Maddie didn’t believe that for a second. “You have.”
Nick furrowed his brow.
“You’re taller,” Maddie said, smiling. “You were always tall, but you’re really tall now.” He was also more muscular. Maddie had no doubt the body that resided under his cute little uniform was something to behold. She always knew he would grow into his looks, but she had no idea the outcome would be this … breathtaking.
Nick swallowed. “So, are you just here for a visit?”
Maddie shook her head. She’d imagined this conversation so many different times, she was genuinely curious where it would actually go. “I’m back to stay.”
“W-w-what?” The word was barely a whisper.
“I’m here to stay,” Maddie said, biting her bottom lip to calm her nerves. “Someone needs to take care of Granny.”
“I don’t need someone to take care of me,” Maude argued. “And I told you not to call me that. I don’t want anyone to know I’m old enough to be a grandmother.”
Nick’s eyes flashed with amusement. “No one would ever believe you’re old enough to be a grandmother, Maude.”
“Only people with eyes,” Harriet said.
“You shut your herpes-infested mouth,” Maude shot back.
Nick glanced over his shoulder reluctantly. Things were going to get out of hand again if he wasn’t careful. Maddie’s sudden reappearance was more pressing than Harriet and Maude’s fight, though. “I was sorry to hear about Olivia.”
Maddie swallowed hard. Her mother’s death had been weighing on her since she’d received the devastating call a month before. She hadn’t been sick. She hadn’t been tired. She hadn’t been anything but full of light. Still, the knowledge that Olivia had died alone in her bed – an undetected heart problem stalking her for years – had thrown Maddie. It had taken weeks of looking over her options – and her life – to make Maddie realize that her only choice was to return home. “Thank you.”
“There was no funeral,” Nick said.
“She didn’t like them,” Maddie said. “She didn’t want people to look at her while she was dead, and she didn’t want a bunch of people crying over her after she’d moved on.”
“That sounds like her,” Nick said.
“Yeah,” Maddie said, shifting uncomfortably. “She was cremated. I’m going to spread her ashes out at Willow Lake when I get settled. It’s what she wanted.”
“She always loved the lake.”
“She wasn’t the only one,” Maddie pointed out.
“So, you’re just … coming home to take care of Maude?”
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me,” Maude protested.
“Yes, you do,” Maddie said, rolling her eyes as she turned back to Nick. “I’m also going to be taking over Magicks.” Magicks was her mother’s store. It was a hodgepodge of candles, herbs, tarot card readings, and other kitschy items, and it was a mainstay in Blackstone Bay. Maddie couldn’t bear to let it go, and Maude was incapable of running it without her.
“You’re giving up being a nurse?” Nick seemed surprised.
“I haven’t been a nurse in a few years,” Maddie admitted.
“Why not? That’s what you went to college for. That’s why you … left.”
Maddie shrugged. That was a conversation for another time – one where they didn’t have an audience. “It’s a long story.”
Nick nodded. “I didn’t think … you said you’d never come back.”
“I was wrong,” Maddie said simply.
Nick cocked his head to the side as Maude and Harriet started going at each other again behind him. “I … .”
“I know,” Maddie said, her heart pinging. “Hey, I’m home for good now. I’m sure we can … catch up … soon.”
“Right,” Nick said, his voice flat. “We’ll just … catch up.”
“WELL, that didn’t go very well.”
Maddie glanced over at Maude, who was sitting in the passenger seat of her car as Maddie navigated the side streets of Blackstone Bay and headed to the outskirts of town. “What didn’t go very well?”
“Your big reunion with Nick.”
“What big reunion?”
“You two used to be closer than a virgin’s thighs at a whorehouse,” Maude said. “What I saw today was downright pitiful.”
“First of all, that’s a really odd – and obnoxious – saying,” Maddie said. “Second of all, what was pitiful? We haven’t seen each other in forever. It’s not like we’re still in high school.”
“He’s your best friend.”
“He was my best friend,” Maddie corrected. “Time changes things.”
“Yeah, that’s why your face is paler than Santa Claus’ butt hair.”
“Stop saying things like that,” Maddie snapped. “You just do it for attention. You know it, and I know it.”
“Don’t change the subject,” Maude said. “I want to know what you’re feeling.”
“I’m not feeling anything.”
“Oh, Madeline Graves, don’t run that on me,” Maude said. “I know how you felt about that boy.”
Maddie refused to look at her grandmother. She was afraid, if she did, the woman would see all of the emotions she was busily trying to tamp down. “He was my best friend.”
“You loved him,” Maude said. “You always loved him. First, you loved him as the boy you went frogging with in the summer. Then you loved him as the boy you went mushroom hunting with in the spring. Then you loved him as the boy who had all the girls chasing him in middle school. Then you really loved him as the boy who broke hearts all across town in high school. He was more than your best friend.”
Maddie sighed. She hated Maude’s insight. The woman had always been a wonderful grandmother – taking her on adventures as a child, serving as a sounding board when her mother didn’t have time to listen to her problems as a teenager – but she had an eerie way of being able to look into Maddie’s soul. It made her uncomfortable. “I loved him as my best friend.”
“Maddie,” Maude snorted, exasperated. “You might have been able to convince yourself of that while you were away, but you’re not going to be able to keep up that charade now that you’re back. You two won’t be able to stay away from each other.”
“We’re adults now,” Maddie said. “A lot has changed.”
“And some things never change,” Maude said. “Some things … some things are just forever, Maddie. You and Nick are forever.”
Part of Maddie wanted to believe that. The other part was more realistic. “We haven’t talked to each other in a decade.”
“And whose fault is that?” Maude challenged.
“Well, it’s certainly not mine,” Maddie said.
“Really? He called you all the time after you left for college,” Maude said. “You dodged his calls until he gave up.”
That was only partially true, but Maddie was feeling belligerent. “Our lives went in different directions.”
“Because you picked a direction he couldn’t follow,” Maude said. “Hell, girl, you picked a direction you couldn’t stick to either.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Don’t even deny it,” Maude said. “I know why you chose to go to college down south. I know what was weighing on you when you did it, and I understand having to get away. You didn’t have to choose to live there, though. You could’ve come home when you graduated. You could’ve had that boy then.”
Maddie made a face as she turned into the driveway in front of Magicks. The store was located on the main floor of an old Victorian, one that Maude and her late husband, Homer, had purchased and renovated fifty years before. Now, the family lived on the second floor of the home and ran the business out of the main floor. “I could never have Nick.” She killed the engine of Maude’s car and handed the keys over to her grandmother. “He never was … mine.”
“Oh, Maddie, you’re so blind you need to find those big glasses you used to wear in middle school,�
�� Maude said. “You know the ones that made you look like a constipated tortoise? You clearly need them.”
“Granny … .”
“Don’t call me that,” Maude warned, wagging a finger in Maddie’s direction. “Girl, just listen to me for a second. I know you never thought that Nick noticed you in that way. And it’s true, it took him a long time to recognize what was in front of him, but you crushed him when you left. You broke his heart. He was a sad and depressed mess.”
“He let me go.”
“What choice did he have, Maddie? Should he have stalked you to Ann Arbor? Should he have wrestled you down and made you see the light? You chose to leave.”
“And he chose to stay.”
“And now you chose to come home,” Maude said. “You can say it’s to take care of me, and if you keep telling people that, by the way, I’m going to thump you good.” Maude waved her clenched fist in Maddie’s face. “You didn’t just come home because of me, though. You didn’t just come home because of the store. You came home because of him, too.”
“He’s got a life that doesn’t include me, Granny,” Maddie said, purposely using the one word she knew continuously drove Maude over the deep end. “I came home to build a new life.”
“And you don’t think Nick will be part of that life?”
“I think there’s too much water under that bridge,” Maddie said, pushing open the car door. “Come on. You can cook dinner while I start getting the store in order. It’s a mess down there.”
“You’re a piece of work, Maddie girl,” Maude said. “You always did have to go about things the hard way. It’s darned unfortunate.”
“Everything is going to work out, Granny,” she said. “It’s going to be fine.”
“It is going to be fine,” Maude agreed, following Maddie up the front steps. “You just don’t realize how fine it’s going to be because you’re downright stubborn. You’ll find out, though, and I don’t think it will take very long.”
“Go cook dinner,” Maddie said, exasperated.
“Fine,” Maude said. “I hope you like casserole.”
“I love casserole,” Maddie said.
“Well, mine tastes like feet,” Maude said. “You’ll live, though. We all know you’re too pretty to cook.”
Maddie watched her grandmother make her way through the store and disappear inside the bowels of the house. Once she was gone, she let the emotions nudging at the edges of her heart take over. Seeing Nick had been harder than she imagined. Her initial reaction to him had been purely physical. When he’d wrapped his arms around her, she’d wanted to climb inside of him. The gesture had been friendly, and strained, but there had been nothing on his part to indicate familiarity. It was just two old acquaintances doing what was expected of them.
That probably hurt more than anything else. She’d expected him to do something. Yell. Rant. Rave. Scream. Shake her. Something. Something that would indicate he still cared. None of that was present.
“Well, I guess it’s better this way,” Maddie muttered, reaching over to a nearby shelf and grabbing a box.
“What’s better this way?”
Maddie yelped at the voice, inadvertently stumbling backwards as a familiar figure blinked into view. “Hello, Mother.”
Three
“You don’t look happy, sunshine.”
Maddie drew in a deep breath and steadied her nerves as she took in her mother’s filmy countenance. She’d expected this. That was another reason she’d returned home. If she couldn’t have her mother in life, she wanted her in death. She fought the urge to cry when her mother’s ghost used the familiar nickname of a happy childhood. “Mom.”
“I wish I could give you a hug,” Olivia said, tilting her head to the side. “You look like you need one.”
Maddie pressed her eyes together briefly, and then wrenched them open so she could study the familiar lines of her mother’s face. Olivia Graves had aged well, which meant she’d retained her beauty in death. She’d lived a clean life. No smoking. No alcohol. Even though her husband had left her when Maddie was a baby, and Olivia had been relegated to long hours of work for meager pay, the woman never gave in to the hardships of life.
“I’ve missed you,” Maddie said, her eyes filling with tears. “I knew you would be here.”
“I could never leave you,” Olivia said.
“What about Granny?”
“Her either,” Olivia said, smiling. “I saw you two come back together. You were arguing. Did something happen?”
“She rear-ended Harriet Proctor.”
Olivia nodded knowingly. “Did they insult each other?”
“According to Granny, Harriet has the herpes,” Maddie said, smiling. She’d missed talking to her mother. It would never be the same. They’d never be able to touch each other again. Maddie would never be able to curl up on her mother’s lap and tell her a lifetime’s worth of woes, but Maddie’s “peculiarity” was a gift – in this case, at least.
“Well, I’m glad she’s feeling better,” Olivia said. “It’s been hard to watch her struggle since my … passing.”
Maddie had been able to see ghosts since she was a small child. The first time it happened, she’d been traumatized. She’d raced home to tell her mother what the man in the strange uniform told her at the cemetery. After five cups of hot cocoa – and a multitude of mini-marshmallows – Olivia had laid out a lifetime legacy to Maddie. The “peculiarity” ran in the family. Maude didn’t have it, but her mother and sister had. Olivia had, too, so she wasn’t surprised when her daughter manifested the ability.
Now? Now it was a blessing. “She doesn’t know you’re here?”
“You know she can’t see the dead, sunshine,” Olivia said. “She always felt lucky because it skipped her.”
“I’m betting she doesn’t feel so lucky now,” Maddie said, settling on the chair behind the counter, her mind busy. “Mom … ?”
“I didn’t know what was happening,” Olivia said, reading the emotion on her daughter’s face. “I was asleep. I didn’t feel it. There was no pain. There was no fear.”
“How did you know what I was thinking?”
“That’s what a mother does,” Olivia said, raising her ethereal hand and miming running it over Maddie’s hair. “You look beautiful.”
“I look like I’ve always looked,” Maddie scoffed. “I’m just boring, old Maddie.”
“Oh, sweetie, you’ve never been able to see yourself,” Olivia said. “I blame myself. I didn’t build up your self-esteem enough as a child.”
“Wasn’t that Granny’s job?”
“And she was good at it,” Olivia said. “It still would’ve been better coming from me.”
“You were a great mother,” Maddie argued. “You gave me everything I ever needed.”
“Except a smile,” Olivia said, studying Maddie’s face. “What were you and Mom arguing about when you came in?”
Maddie wrinkled her nose. “She’s convinced I handled things badly with Nick this afternoon.”
Olivia was interested, her blues eyes widening at Maddie’s admission. “You saw Nick today?”
“He was called to the scene of the accident.”
“Poor, Nick,” Olivia said, chuckling. “He’s got the patience of a saint, and he needs it with those two going at each other.”
“He looked like he was ready to throttle them both.”
“And how did he react to seeing you?” Olivia’s question was pointed.
Maddie averted her gaze. “He seemed surprise.”
“And?”
“He gave me a quick hug, and then we had to go.”
Olivia’s face was hard to read. “I’m betting there was more to it than that.”
Maddie plastered an inscrutable look on her face. “Why are you and Granny so convinced there’s some conspiracy about my relationship with Nick? We were friends – a lifetime ago – and now we’re just old acquaintances.”
“Is that what you’re te
lling yourself these days?” Olivia asked.
“It’s the truth.”
Olivia’s enigmatic smile set Maddie’s teeth on edge. “Keep telling yourself that, sunshine. The longer you keep deluding yourself, the longer you’ll be in pain.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“You know exactly what it means,” Olivia chided. “Don’t act stupid. You’re a bright girl, Maddie Graves. I’ve always known that. The only thing you can’t see is the truth when it comes to Nick – and yourself. You’re clearly not ready to see what’s in front of you, so I’m not going to push you. How about, instead, we get the store organized? It seems to have fallen into disarray during my death.”
“Granny has interesting cleaning habits,” Maddie agreed.
“Since I can’t help, I’ll supervise,” Olivia offered, smiling widely. “I think this is going to be fun.”
NICK pumped his legs hard as he climbed the hill, raising his knees high as he finished the fifth mile of his morning run. His mind was busy, memories of his past colliding with the uncertainty of his future as he tried to wrap his brain around Maddie’s sudden arrival the day before.
What was she doing back here?
There had been a time when Nick had been convinced he would marry Maddie. He knew it in the fiber of his very being. He had grand delusions of her triumphant return to Blackstone Bay after getting her nursing degree, of her racing into his arms and admitting she loved him the second she crossed the town line. He saw a big wedding, children, and happily ever after.
Those fantasies had all been for naught.
It had taken years for Nick to finally relinquish them. When she left for college, Nick considered going after her. He even had his truck packed and a speech written down on a napkin to recite back to her, one that professed his love in no uncertain terms. His courage failed that day. What would’ve happened if it hadn’t?
For the first few months, Nick called her every week. She answered eagerly at first. He could almost hear her fighting off tears over the phone as they talked. After a few weeks, though, she stopped answering his calls. It had taken months for him to give up, each unanswered call poking another hole in his heart. He was bitter after a time, and he’d spent years cursing her very existence – mostly because her angelic face kept haunting his dreams.
Grave Homecoming (A Maddie Graves Mystery Book 1) Page 2