by Linda Ford
“How is it to be mended when she’s left?”
She smiled gently. “Go after her. Persuade her to return. I’ll keep the children.”
He hesitated ten seconds as his head and heart warred over what to do. Couldn’t he trust both? Hadn’t she proved herself trustworthy? Fun yet responsible. “I’ll go.” He swung up to the saddle.
Linette caught her arm. “God go with you. I’ll be praying.”
“Tell the children I’ll be back when I find her.” He knew they’d approve of his decision.
“I’ll let them know.”
He rode from the yard and headed away at a gallop, then realized he needed to slow down. He had a long trip ahead of him.
As the miles pounded away under Sam’s hooves, Abel prayed. He prayed for forgiveness for the wild life he had chosen for a time, for the heartache he had caused his parents. One thing he meant to do as soon as he brought Mercy back was write his parents and tell them how sorry he was. He prayed that God would free him of guilt. You’ve given me life to enjoy and I’ve been attempting to turn it into drudgery. Most of all, he prayed Mercy would listen to him and accept his apology and his love.
The sun was high overhead when he reached the town where the Wild West show was supposed to be. But he saw no sign of it—no tents. Nothing. He saw a man crossing the street and rode up to him. “Say, did I hear there was a Wild West show around here?”
“Sorry, mister. You missed it. They pulled out this morning.”
“Pulled out. What direction?”
“South. Along that road.” The man pointed.
Abel sank back in his saddle. He’d missed her. But surely he could catch up to them. “Thanks.” He headed down the street toward the road indicated. The smell of food slowed him. He should eat before he continued, but he couldn’t spare the time. He must find Mercy.
*
The first night at the show, Mercy knew she’d made a mistake. She’d waited until after dark to crack open the door. She saw no one and quietly tiptoed out. Angel knew her plans and tried to dissuade her but promised she would not interfere.
One foot had reached the ground when a hand clamped to her shoulder. Her breath caught in her throat. She tried and failed to control the jolt that shook her body.
“Gus thought you might be foolish enough to wander about,” Bull ground out. “Says to warn you it isn’t safe out there. It’s my job to make sure everyone is safe, especially you pretty ladies. So be a good girl and go to bed.” There was no mistaking the warning in his voice or the pressure of his hand meant to convey the same message.
She spun around and went back inside.
“I tried to warn you,” Angel said. “Give it up and go to sleep.”
But Mercy did not go to bed. She sat on a chair facing the door. Darkness made it impossible to see anything as she strained for any sound. Maybe Bull would leave. If he did, she’d be prepared.
What a fool she’d been to think she needed excitement and adventure. She didn’t want either. She’d found all she needed in caring for Abel and his family. All she really wanted, all she’d really ever wanted, was someone to care about her. If only Abel had shown he did.
Did God care?
What had Bertie said? God sees us wherever we are. We could never go so far away that God wasn’t with us.
God, are You here right now? Do You see me? She knew He did. Can You help me? She didn’t know how He could but she trusted He would. Trust. Maybe that was the heart of her problem. She didn’t trust her parents to love her. Maybe Butler’s death had destroyed something in them so they couldn’t. But she’d used the same measuring stick with everyone, including God. Just as Abel used Ruby as the measuring stick for his life. She held back a chuckle. They were both so foolish.
God, please rescue me. All I want is a chance to show Abel I’m not Ruby. All I want is a chance to give the twins and him the love that I’ve longed for all my life.
Even if it took a long time, she would not give up.
The night hours slipped away. At times her trust in God faltered. But each time it did, she reminded herself that God was not like her parents to stop loving her.
She jerked to full attention. Had she fallen asleep? What time was it? What had wakened her? She strained to catch any sound. Then she heard it. A scratching at the door.
She bolted to her feet.
Did Bull or Gus intend to take advantage of her? Her hands shaking so badly her teeth rattled, she palmed her pistol. They’d have to deal with that before they touched her.
Chapter Nineteen
The doorknob rattled. Help me, God. Protect me. Mercy could barely make out shapes in the darkness. Couldn’t be certain but it looked like the door cracked open.
“Miss?” The whisper was kindly enough, but Mercy didn’t mean to take any chances.
“Don’t come any closer or I’ll shoot.”
“Miss, I’m here to help you.”
Help? Surely it was a trick. “I don’t need any help.”
“I think you do. You don’t know my name so I won’t give it but you’ve seen me plenty of times in the woods around Eden Valley Ranch. I shot a mountain lion that was about to attack your friend, Abel Borgard.”
The man in the woods!
“You need to hurry. I don’t think Bull will sleep very long.”
Still Mercy hesitated, uncertain whom she could trust.
“Miss, your horse is waiting down the street.”
Nugget. She could trust him. And God. Was this an answer to her prayer? Tucking her pistol in the waistband of her trousers, she grabbed the bags she had prepared earlier. “I’m coming.”
“Be very quiet.”
She stepped outside. A thin moon made it possible to see dark shapes. That bulky form near her door must be Bull. The loud snore made her jump but confirmed he slept. She tiptoed past him, following the shadowy figure ahead of her. Filling her mind were a thousand questions that would have to wait until it was safe to talk.
They crossed the yard. She sucked in air and stilled her anger and fear as they passed Gus’s quarters. Her attention momentarily diverted, she stepped on a stick. The crack shot into the still air and she halted, holding her breath. When nothing happened she continued after the man from the woods.
They left behind the circle of tents and bunkhouses and stepped into the dark street. Still they hurried along as silently as possible. They turned a corner. Dawn streaked the sky, making it possible to see shapes.
A horse whinnied. Nugget. He stood at the hitching rail down the street and she ran to him and buried her face against his neck, choking back tears.
As soon as she could speak, she turned to her rescuer. “Thank you for helping me, but who are you? How did you know I was here?” She stared at the whiskered face as the elusive memory tugged at her brain. “Where have I seen you before?”
“You do remember me.” He grinned. “I wondered.”
She snapped her fingers. “I know where. I saw you at Fort Benton at the Wild West show.” He’d been one of those grooming a big Clydesdale and then had raced a team of them pulling a careening wagon around the arena.
“Clay Morgan at your service, ma’am.” He touched the brim of his hat.
“Pleased to meet you. But how did you end up at the Eden Valley Ranch? How did you know I was here?”
“I left the show at Fort Benton. Got tired of the stuff that goes on after the shows.”
She had an inkling of what he meant.
“So I headed for the Northwest. Heard a man could find solitude and peace there.”
She wondered if he’d found it.
“I saw you riding in the woods and recognized you. Watched you practice your riding and roping tricks. You got pretty good.”
“Thanks.” In hindsight it seemed foolish.
“I saw you ride home soaking wet the other day. Later, I started to worry about you and went to the ranch to see if you got back safely and were okay. A cowboy there told me you�
�d left to join this show.” He grunted and stroked his beard. “I know this outfit. Didn’t figure you’d find it to your liking.”
“How right you were.” She held her hand out. “I thank you. I believe God sent you in answer to my desperate prayers.”
Their hands were still clasped so she felt the jolt in his arm.
“Miss, you think God can use an old reprobate like me?”
She heard the underlying question because it echoed her own of only a few hours ago. “God loves you. He loves me.” The words filled her mouth with sweetness.
Clay pulled his hand to his side. “That’s something to think on. Now you best be on your way.” He scratched his chin through the mass of whiskers. “I suggest you avoid the roads for a while in case Gus decides to try and track you down.”
Her insides tightened again. “Where can I hide?”
He grinned. “Best place to hide is in plain sight. Tie your horse behind the hotel and go to the lobby.”
“I will. Thank you.” But she didn’t leave. “Will I see you again?”
“Could be. I’ve got a camp set up near the ranch.” He sketched a wave and strode down the street.
She took up Nugget’s reins and led him around to the alley behind the hotel, intending to stay out of sight in plain view until Gus and his show were a long way from town.
Now that she had escaped her foolish dreams, the enormity of what she’d done slammed into her and, with a moan, she bent over her knees. She had to get back to the ranch. If they’d let her back. Once Abel heard where she’d been and what she’d experienced he might never want her around the children again. He would be right. Her foolishness put not only herself but others in danger.
A question that had hammered relentlessly at the back of her mind insisted on attention. Were Ladd and Allie okay after their cold, wet adventure? Oh, how she ached to know they were both safe.
Would she ever see them again? Ever get a chance to prove to Abel the love that flooded her heart once she gave herself permission to believe she could be loved?
She waited with Nugget for an hour or so, not wanting to draw attention to herself by entering the hotel too early in the morning.
The longer she waited, the more the questions peppered her brain. Oh, God, please give me another chance with Abel and the children.
*
His stomach growled, protesting Abel’s decision to forgo a meal. But he had to hurry along and catch the show before the day ended. Food could wait, he insisted again. Finding Mercy could not. As he reined about to resume his journey a woman stepped in front of him.
He jerked back on the rein, bringing Sam to a sudden halt. “Sorry.”
The woman looked like Mercy. The way she walked, the tumble of mahogany hair down her back, everything about her.
He rubbed his eyes. Was he dreaming? Seeing her in every adult female? This gal wore trousers and a fringed shirt. No doubt a part of the Wild West show. He wasn’t dreaming. It was Mercy, but why was she here? Had she missed the show? She moved with a purposeful step. Was she trying to locate the show, catch up to it?
He sat back on his saddle. If this was what she wanted, could he take it from her? No. He’d learned that lesson well enough with Ruby. But he couldn’t let her go without talking to her, telling her how he felt.
“Mercy.” His call rang out.
She drew to a halt and slowly turned to face him. Surprise and shock wreathed her face and then she gasped and ran toward him. He dropped to the ground to meet her.
“The twins?” she gasped. “Are they sick? Is Allie…?”
“They’re fine. I came for my own sake.” He grasped her upper arms and held her close but not too close. He must not be distracted by hugging and kissing. “Mercy, I was hasty and wrong in accusing you of putting Ladd and Allie in danger. I know you wouldn’t do that.” He let the words sink in as he filled his lungs.
Her eyes widened as if she found it difficult to believe his words.
He rushed on, determined to make her understand. “I feared everyone would be like Ruby, putting their own interests ahead of the children. But more than that, I feared trusting what my heart said.”
She tipped her head slightly to the side and studied him with guarded eyes. “What does your heart say?”
A smile drew his mouth wide. He drank in her features—her dark eyes, beautiful skin, lovely lips, then realized she waited for his answer. “My heart says…” He tried to sort out the many things he felt. “It says you are the best thing that ever happened to me. I can trust you. And enjoy life with you.” His voice deepened. “Mercy, I love you and I want to share my life with you.”
She laughed softly. “Took you long enough to figure it out.”
“I had a lot to sort out.” He stroked her cheek. “I know you want to join a Wild West show and I would never ask you to give up your dreams. But I’ll come, too. I’ll bring the children. We’ll help you.”
There was a sheen of tears in her eyes. “Abel, you’d do that for me?”
“I’ll do whatever you need.”
She lifted a hand and cupped his face, warm and possessive, and he turned into her palm.
“Abel, I found the show. I was invited to join them. It was awful.” A shudder ran up her arm and he pulled her closer.
“If someone hurt you…”
“No. Our friendly woodsman rescued me.” She filled in the details.
“I’m so grateful you’re safe, but there are other shows.”
She shook her head. “You don’t understand. I don’t want to join a Wild West show. I don’t want to perform. I don’t need the attention, because I found what I need with you and the twins.”
“You did?” He ached for her to say she returned his feelings or at least welcomed them but he wasn’t sure what she meant.
“Abel, I found acceptance with you. I found something worth being a part of.”
He wanted more, but was he being greedy?
She chuckled. “Abel, just in case you aren’t understanding what I’m saying, let me be clear. I love you. I want nothing else on earth but to share your life.”
He stared. “You love me?”
She nodded, her eyes sparkling with joy. “You and the twins.”
He leaned forward, but realized how very public the street was. “Let’s find someplace private.”
She led him to the back of the hotel where Nugget waited.
He pulled her into his arms, looked deep into her eyes. “Say it again.”
Her soft laugh danced across his heart. “Abel Borgard, I love you and I want to share your life.”
He caught the last word with his lips and claimed her mouth with a heart full of gratitude and anticipation of the future.
Cupping his cheeks with her hands, she offered him all her love in a kiss that threatened to explode his heart.
He eased back enough to smile into her welcoming gaze. “I love you, Mercy Newell. When can we change it to Mercy Borgard?”
She trailed her fingers along his jawline sending joy into every corner of his mind. “Do you suppose someone in this town could perform a ceremony?”
He roared with laughter. “You don’t want to wait?”
“I have been waiting all my life.” Her eyes filled with such need he hugged her tight to his chest and leaned his head against hers.
“You have my love now and always.”
She clung to his shirtfront. “I don’t want to ever leave you. Or have you leave me.”
“I won’t, except maybe to go hunting or get firewood.”
She laughed.
His tension eased. “That’s better.” He wiped the tears from her eyes. “Wouldn’t want the bride to appear teary.” He tucked her in at his side. “Now let’s go find a judge or preacher or someone to marry us.”
She leaned her head on his shoulder. “I’m deliriously happy.”
“Are you sure you aren’t just overtired?” She’d told him how she’d sat awake all night waiting for
a chance to escape.
“I’m wide-awake now. Thanks to your kiss.”
They grinned at each other then restricted themselves to holding hands as they reached the street. They found the Mountie in his office and made their inquiry.
“You are indeed fortunate. The circuit judge is here today to hold court. He’ll be glad to perform a marriage ceremony.” He directed them to the hotel.
An hour later they stood hand in hand while the stern-looking judge married them. “I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss.”
She turned and wrapped her arms around her husband. He claimed her mouth in a gentle promise of forever.
Epilogue
“Do I look like a fancy riding lady?” Allie asked.
“You certainly do.” Even more important, she looked the picture of health. Miss Oake’s doctor cousin had visited and examined Allie and given the word that her heart was as sound as Ladd’s.
Marriage to Abel was beyond anything Mercy had dreamed possible. He was thoroughly attentive, affectionate and caring. Within a few weeks, Mercy discovered she could think of her parents without the sharp pain she’d grown so familiar with she barely noticed it.
They had moved into the new cabin before the first snowfall. Mercy had made it homey with framed pictures, a collection of books and the quilts she’d finished for the children in time for Christmas. And what a Christmas it had been. For the first time since she was very young, Mercy celebrated the season with a heart overflowing with joy and excitement. The twins were so eager for the day that many times they brought chuckles to the lips of Abel and Mercy. Sharing the anticipation with the twins and Abel was the best Christmas gift she could ask for. With his ax, Abel had shaped a statue of a boy and girl sitting arm and arm on a bench. It was clearly the twins. She’d never seen anything more beautiful and told him so.
Every day she rose with a smile on her lips. Abel always traced the smile with his fingertip before kissing her.
She sighed.
Ladd tugged at her sleeve. “You gonna get ready?”
She brought her attention back to their task. “I’m about ready.”