by Jools Louise
Where we headed, to the north, was fairly remote since the resort was at the south of the island. The airstrip had been built where it was relatively flat terrain, as had the refuelling station utilized during WWII. Raphael had explored a little with Louis and Dean and Marcus at various times, but hadn’t been here for a while, busy with the resort guests.
He was excited, since he’d been reading up on the various turtles in the area, Fiji, and its surrounding archipelago, and wanted to check out what species might nest here. Sheesh! The idea had sounded great after a couple of beers, not so great in the early hours of sober predawn.
As we trekked along in single file, the sky above began to lighten to a dusky gray and I rolled my eyes. Great, I’d see my first sunrise! Whoopee! I knew I was only bitching because it was so early, and I’d left Caleb and Jackson and Michael warmly cuddling in my bed while I set out through the jungle searching for sea turtles four miles away from my nice warm bed. God! I’m such a whiner. Sighing and getting a chuckle at my grumpy morning demeanour, Raphael finally relented with the coffee and poured three cups out. I frowned, then looked at Raphael, thinking the man must have planted a few seeds with Riley about the turtles, wanting to see if the guy would follow us. Huh! Louis had told us yesterday he wanted a lie-in, so the cup couldn’t be for him.
Coffee break was over much too soon and we set off again, making good time. It took about two hours of hard walking to get to the northern beach and I was secretly glad I’d come as the sunrise was pretty awesome. We watched it from a little hill overlooking the wide stretch of sand below. As the sun rose further, dark shapes could be seen dotted about, hundreds of them. There was a strange scuffing sound, like flip-flops on a sandy floor. We stared.
Lighter still, the dawn brought sea turtles. Specifically, according to our resident wildlife geek Raphael, they were the critically endangered Hawksbill turtles. Raphael did a happy dance, not a bit disappointed that they weren’t the Leatherbacks he had hoped to see.
“So this is a good thing?” Riley asked the question hesitantly, mesmerised by the hundreds of mama turtles digging holes in the sand, covering holes, or heading back to the ocean, exhausted from egg-laying and nest-building duties.
Raphael stared at Riley incredulously.
Grabbing the unsuspecting man by the shoulders, he gave Riley a little shake.
“Hawksbill turtles are endangered. In 1996 their population had declined worldwide by eighty percent, because of exploitation and illegal hunting. They’re a delicacy in some countries and the price on the black market for their meat is extortionate.” Raphael apparently realized that Riley had frozen and immediately let go, cursing luridly in Spanish at his actions.
“No, it’s okay, Raph. I wasn’t scared of you…but someone else has come to look at the turtles.” We all looked to the far side of the cove where a Rigid Inflatable Boat or RIB was moving slowly toward the nesting beach.
“Crap! That’s no fishing boat or lost tourist.” Raph cursed again and I looked harder at the boat. The people in it were definitely not fishermen or tourists. They carried firearms, large nets, and definitely gave every indication of wanting to do something other than admire the turtle site. My instincts went with the theory of them wanting turtle meat and I realized we were definitely ill-equipped to stop the well-armed poachers.
“They’re not doing what I think they’re doing, are they?” Riley sounded angry, watching helplessly as three men jumped from the boat into the shallows and began wrestling turtles into the nets they carried. I began to leap up, but Raphael’s hard grip on me kept me from running to stop the evil men. They seemed to definitely want more than just a normal hungry family needing to eat. I cried inwardly as at least thirty turtles were swept up into nets, and then thrown haphazardly into the dinghy. As soon as they had their hoard, the boat’s engine growled to life again and sped off along the shoreline to disappear around the headland in a north-westerly direction.
We looked at each other grimly.
“It’s taken thirty years for these mothers to return home to nest and lay their eggs. In twenty minutes, those bastards probably wiped out about 4,000 potential hatchlings since the turtles in the water were on their way to shore and hadn’t laid yet. I need to tell Jackson.” Raphael sounded angry and sad at the same time.
Riley placed a tentative hand on his forearm, squeezing lightly.
“We need to stop the poachers coming back. They must have a larger boat further out, since the poachers will know that the island is inhabited. They wanted to zip in and out of here without being noticed. They’ll be back. I’ll stay and keep an eye out.”
“No!” Raphael yelled, horrified.
Riley lifted a brow, blue eyes intent.
“I’ve already been through Hell, stud. What’s the worst that can happen guarding a few turtles?” I snorted, causing Riley to give me a slight smile of amusement.
“I’ll stay with Riley. Those poachers should know I haven’t had my full coffee this morning…and you know I’m a crazy biatch without it!” What was I saying? Those guys had assault rifles. Sheesh! I really needed to keep my mouth shut sometimes.
Raphael looked at both of us, me lifting my chin and giving him my haughty look.
“Perhaps you think it’d be better if I ran for help?” The bark of laughter was just a little insulting, even though he knew I was the least likely person on the planet to run for any reason.
“Good point! I’ll go.” Raphael left the backpack with the breakfast goodies in. “I’ll be back soon, with reinforcements.” His gaze rested on Riley, and then with a grimace of almost pain he moved swiftly back the way they came.
Riley and I sat down to think about our options.
“They’ll be back fairly soon, I should imagine,” I said out loud.
“The poachers?” Riley sat nervously, one hand raking through his brightly coloured hair.
“Yes. The poachers.” I paused for a minute, gazing down at the hard-working female turtles trying to secure the next generation of hatchlings. “Perhaps we should have a surprise in store for them when they arrive.” I could feel Riley’s gaze on me and turned my head to look at him.
“What do you think we could use to act as a deterrent, in case they come back before the guys?”
Riley’s eyes widened as he realized I was serious.
“Raphael told us to sit here and wait for him. You do realize I’m one of the patients here, undergoing psychotherapy due to intense mental trauma?”
I smiled at Riley, cupping his cheek gently and giving him a soft kiss on his nose. He didn’t even flinch, which told me everything.
“I’m thinking the presence of a certain husky, hairy ex-wrestler of the Latino variety might just be helping with that, luv.” Riley blushed, ducking his head in embarrassment.
“Raphael is a keeper, luv. He’s on the peripheral of our group, looking for a soul mate. I thought the problem was me, that he couldn’t bond properly because of me. I think perhaps it’s because he really wants a meaningful relationship with one person. A guy. I think maybe you’re that guy. I saw the look in his eyes when he looked at you…he’s in love.” Riley’s eyes darted to mine, questioning and unsure.
“But…he’s with the crew. He’s one of your crew.”
“He’s with whoever he wants to be with.” I wrapped a careful arm around Riley’s narrow shoulders. “I don’t know much about his history, but I do know the look of a man in love. And Raphael loves you!” I hugged him. “There are no jealousies and no judgements with the crew. I’m not selfish, and whilst I admit he one heck of a…man”—I wiggled my eyebrows to show him what I really meant—“if he’s really into you, then that’s all that matters. I don’t want him unhappy staying in a situation which doesn’t suit him. I love the man, but I’m happy if he’s happy.”
Riley looked like he was going to cry, then sniffed and leant against me.
“I don’t know if I can be with him. I feel like something’s broken ins
ide, but when I’m with him it makes me want to be better. I want to be with him. I don’t want to have these nightmares and memories. If I wasn’t such a coward, I’d have killed myself by now.”
“The only cowards on this island are the ones who just left with thirty sea turtles because they’re too lazy to help save the species and just want to make easy money.” I hugged Riley again, holding his hand in mine.
“You could have given in at any time. You could just take a gun and put a bullet through your brain…but you haven’t. You could throw yourself in front of a train…but you haven’t. You could have told Jackson and all those therapists to fuck the hell off when they suggested coming here and trying to help you. That’s what a coward would do…you didn’t. You don’t want to die, ’cos dying means the bastards who killed your buddies have won. You have nothing to prove to the military. They owe you. You survived whatever they threw at you and didn’t flinch. Healing from trauma isn’t done in a minute. It’s baby steps. One baby step at a time. Do you think the memories will go away? They won’t. They’ll stay with you, but you’ll be strong enough to cope, you’ll be able to box them up and say to yourself, ‘I won, I survived…’” I felt Riley’s arm go around me.
“What happened to you?”
I stared at him for a second.
“The bastards known as my family let a rapist attack me over and over in their home, in my bed every night for two years. No one stopped it and no one cared until one day I got pregnant. Their solution was to ‘self-medicate.’ They got a ‘friend of the family’ to perform an illegal abortion which damaged me so badly I had to spend weeks in the hospital after having my womb removed. I was taken into care at the age of thirteen. It took me nearly dying for anyone to listen to what a bastard my stepfather was and how my mother just let him hurt me so she didn’t have to admit she failed.” Riley’s head rested on my shoulder as I retold my sad tale in a matter-of-fact voice, like it was no big deal.
“The best thing that ever happened was being removed from their care. The worst was having to wake up every day remembering the smell and taste and feel of that monster on and in me. I would wake up in the middle of the night under him or with his dick in my mouth. I can still remember the taste of his filthy, unwashed penis which was the size of a pencil. He had small-dick syndrome. I decided early on I wasn’t going to let him ruin my life, but I was still affected by it for years. No one at school knew what happened, treating me like some fat stupid bitch because I ate to forget. They won’t win. They haven’t won. I have eight, now seven, hunky guys who make me feel special and lovely and loved. Don’t be too afraid to reach out and take what you want.”
“Hear, hear.” I jumped, startled as Jackson’s soft voice sounded behind me.
I looked ’round and saw the crew, Jackson, and five of the guests who were former military. Everyone was armed to the teeth. I hadn’t known we had firearms on the island.
“I suppose you heard all that,” I asked, ducking my head at having revealed my sordid little past.
“Yep! Clear as a bell, luv.” Max could always be trusted to lighten the mood. “You just let me know where the bastard stepfather is incarcerated and I’ll send him a nice gesture of appreciation…like an incendiary bomb.” Although sometimes Max was as fierce as any of the warriors here.
The rest of the crew nodded in agreement, sending me sympathetic looks but not pushing.
“How come you got here so fast?” Riley asked, since Raphael had only been gone for about twenty minutes.
“We saw the larger boat offshore, to the west. Marcus recognised it as one which came here last year, before you arrived. We scared them off, since they got a little…aggressive when we told them this was private property.” Caleb grinned, relishing the memory of Marcus’s warning shot with an RPG across the bow.
I gave Marcus a look and he grinned at me, looking decidedly unrepentant.
“No wonder they had assault rifles,” Riley said, hesitantly joining in the conversation.
“We knew there might be turtles here, but with all the construction and then bonding with Jess, we haven’t explored here for a while. The last time must have been the wrong time of year.”
“How are we going to deter the poachers?” I asked, since poachers were paid by people who usually had lots of money and weren’t deterred by much. The RPG appeared to have worked temporarily, however.
“We just called in the services of a couple of friends of ours from the Australian Navy.” I looked at the grin on Jackson’s face and raised one brow in question.
“Friends?” This came from Riley. Raphael stepped forward, close to Riley but not touching.
“An Ozzie Naval frigate is out doing some manoeuvres in this area, training or something. They said they’d lend a hand in scaring the poachers off.”
No sooner had he said this than a large gray vessel, bristling with guns and a helicopter clinging to its upper deck, eased around the headland.
A small RIB was deployed and aimed for the shore. Jackson and the rest of us waited until the small dinghy headed along the shore, walking to a slightly quieter area of shoreline and then beached in the shallows. Our group met them, taking care to avoid the busiest area of the beach.
“Well now, Jacks! What’s this we hear about a bunch of turtle-snatchers giving you gip!” The broad Aussie accent accompanied a thump on Jackson’s shoulder as the apparent leader of the sailors spoke first.
“Hawksbill nesting site. The poachers already took thirty females that we know of, before the turtles had a chance to reach the beach,” I spoke up, regarding the handsome Aussie curiously. He was tall, sandy-haired, and obviously knew Jackson quite well.
The man looked at me, giving me an approving look and a wink at Jackson.
“Well now, sweetness, my squids got the poachers’ RIB and we brought back the turtles. We just hope they’re okay. About five didn’t make it. They drowned as they were pulled behind the boat, but hopefully the others will be okay.” The man nodded toward the beach where four crew members were lifting the remaining turtles from the dinghy.
Everyone held their breath as the turtles lay for several minutes after they had been deposited on the sand, then one by one began to shuffle forward, finding a small patch of suitable terrain before starting the long process of digging a nest hole. Apparently the urge to give birth overrode the turtle mama’s recent trauma.
“Good luck, guys. We’re staying in these waters for a while, so we’ll keep an eye out for any more trouble. Nice to meet you, ma’am. Look after Jacks for me.”
The man waved, and then nimbly made his way back to the boat, stepping around the turtles that lay around. The boat soon left shore, easing gently through the gentle surf before heading out to the frigate.
“Who was he?” I asked, staring after the departing sailors.
Jackson draped an arm around my shoulders.
“That, my lovely, fiercely protective, always grumpy in the morning love of my life, was Commander Nielson, otherwise known as Murphy.” He smiled at my look of confusion.
“Murphy Nielson? So he’s part Irish, then?” This was said facetiously.
“He’s a Class A scoundrel with women, but a First Class ass kicker when it comes to scumbags. He helped us out when we first came here, used the island for some sea-to-land training stuff, and helps with security. This area isn’t known for piracy or drug trafficking, but the exotic animal trade is worth billions of dollars on the black market. It’s the second largest illegal trade outside of drugs and weapons. The poachers are just the end of the chain. The real money is in Asia and the Orient. These turtles are worth ten to fifteen dollars plus per kilo for meat. The shell is the valuable commodity, used for tortoiseshell jewellery, etc. They’re becoming rarer, so market value goes up. The poachers certainly won’t give up so we need to set up a secure zone around this beach. We think maybe they’ve used this island as a base of operations previously, and now we’re here, they aren’t happy poachers.
”
“I’ll help with the first watch,” Riley said, grasping Raphael’s hand in his. Startled, Raphael looked down at their joined hands, then raised his eyes a little to stare into Riley’s icy blue ones.
“I’ll help Riley,” he said, rubbing his thumb gently along Riley’s knuckles. Riley’s sweet smile stole my heart. I could almost hear wedding bells tolling.
“Marcus and Louis, we’ll have you patrol the area as well, along with these guys.” Jackson gestured to the five ex-soldiers who nodded.
“Is this going to be okay for them? It won’t set them back?” I whispered to Jackson, concerned since the ex-soldiers were here to be helped, not help us.
“Ma’am, we all feel like we’re useless. We need to feel like we’re doing something worthwhile.” One of the guests, Simon, answered and I winced at him overhearing my question.
“I wouldn’t have them doing this if I didn’t think it would benefit them.” Jackson kissed my forehead. “Besides, these guys have just asked to stay on as extra security. One is a pilot, two are great cooks, and two have backgrounds as mechanics and engineers. I think maybe it would help since this really is a safe environment…for the most part.”
“You’re all going to stay?” I asked, smiling. One of the worries when sending them back was where they would fit in. For these five, they obviously felt they could be useful at the resort. I couldn’t say I objected. Over the past few weeks they had fit in very well with everyone.
“Ma’am, this place just feels right for all of us. We don’t feel like we’re isolating ourselves from everything. It’s more a question of building something special.” I looked at the small, wiry man who spoke with a broad Northern Irish accent.
“Most of us have been pushed from one shrink to another. People talking at us and not having any clue what it really feels like to have your whole world destroyed. When some Bible-spouting idiot with delusions of power suddenly unleashes a bomb, it affects whole communities and wipes out families.” The man was shorter than I was, of similar size and build to a racing jockey. He had short black hair, a face which looked like it had connected with a few hard surfaces in its time and twinkling black eyes. Right now those eyes were deadly serious, and I wondered what tragedy had befallen his family. His words were heartfelt and appeared to come from personal experience, although I wouldn’t pry.