by Cindy Stark
He left, closing the door behind him. She blinked, her tear ducts suddenly dry. She didn't need time to think. What she needed was answers. She was pretty sure Scott felt the same way about her as she did him, but she had to know for certain.
* * *
Wild, excited heartbeats thumped against Scott's chest as he pocketed the diamond ring and exited the jewelry store on the corner of Main and Canyon in Pinecone's thriving business district. It only covered two square blocks, but plenty of bustling shoppers ducked in and out of stores, not bothered at all by the fluttering snowflakes that were determined to give everyone a white Christmas.
The phone in his coat pocket vibrated, and he pulled it out, hoping it was Katy saying she'd ended her day and wanted to spend the evening with him.
He was surprised to find James Winward's name and number flashing at him instead. "James?"
"Scott. I'm glad I caught you. There's something I feel compelled to discuss with you even though I'm wondering if I should."
"What's going on?"
He released an anxious chuckle. "I'm being selfish here and completely overstepping my bounds by calling you, but I need to talk to you about Katy."
"Katy?"
Winward covered his issue with wanting to promote Katy, and the problems he faced. "I know this is none of my business, but I like her. She has real potential, Scott. I'd hate to see her blow her future on something superficial."
Superficial. There was nothing shallow or insincere in the way he felt about Katy. But could he let her give up her future for him? Would that be another thing she'd regret? "Have you talked to Katy about this?"
"I did."
"What did she say?"
"She asked for a couple of days to think about it."
Winward's reply sucker-punched him in the heart. "I see." If she needed a couple of days to think about things, then she wasn't certain about him at all. "I'm not sure how I can help, James. This really has to be her choice."
The CEO of the medical center sighed. "I was afraid you'd say that. Like I said, I'm being selfish and influencing people when I shouldn't. I hope you'll forgive me."
Scott ended their call and pocketed his phone. The ring he'd just purchased burned against his hip, mocking him for his absurd idea.
* * *
Katy couldn't believe she was actually looking forward to starting a new work week. She hadn't been able to connect with Scott all weekend other than a quick phone call, and she couldn't wait to see him at the Monday morning construction meeting.
The hour between eight when she arrived and their nine o'clock meeting crawled by. This would most likely be her last time to sit on the committee. She was certain after she spoke with Mr. Winward and gave him her decision, he'd remove her from her position.
She didn't care. She'd known that she couldn't pass up this opportunity to see what lay ahead for her and Scott. But beyond that, she'd also come to some other conclusions.
This was her life. She was tired of living up to others' wants and expectations. Yes, she might be giving up a chance to move up the ladder, but she couldn't believe this was the only opportunity she'd have to use her talents. However, it might be the only chance she'd have with Scott, and she was determined to own her life.
She arrived at the meeting five minutes early.
Scott walked in ten minutes late, his coffee cup and files in hand, a solemn look on his face. "Sorry to be late," he said to the group. He sat and pulled out some papers without giving her a cursory glance.
The quiet meeting room roared around her. Something was wrong. Something was very wrong.
The meeting dragged on forever, and Scott did not look in her direction one time. It was as though someone had skipped ahead a few chapters in her book without letting her know what had happened.
Her phone vibrated. She didn't want to get in trouble for reading emails during their meeting, but she felt compelled to look at it. She tucked her phone between her and the edge of the conference table before checking her messages.
There was a text message. From Scott.
She glanced at him, but he kept his gaze on Winward.
She opened the text. Scott wanted to meet in her office right after they finished.
At the conclusion of the meeting, Scott was the first person out the door. She jumped up and went after him.
"Hey." She caught his jacket sleeve, tugging him to a stop. "Would you like to tell me what's going on?"
The troubled expression in his eyes disclosed more than she wanted to know. "I don't think we should discuss this here."
"Discuss what?" She couldn't go another second without an explanation.
He looked past her, down the hall, as Katy heard voices behind her.
"Let's go to your office."
Katy led him to Janet's office and shut the door. She turned to him. "Scott, I don't know what's going on, but you're scaring me."
The look in his eyes turned tortured. "I never meant to hurt you, Katy."
Oh, God. "But you're going to anyway, aren't you?" She put a hand on a bookcase to steady herself.
"This isn't going to work." His words were like arrows pulled from a quiver as he stared straight at her. His weapons pierced deep into her heart.
Pain swelled in her throat, choking her. This was not how she'd pictured things going between them. She'd been certain he'd felt the same way about her. How could she have been so wrong?
It took her a moment before she could speak. "Why?"
He turned toward the window, presenting his back to her. "I don't want to go into it, Katy. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."
"Sooner? Have you been thinking about this for a while, then?" Had her mother and Sienna been right? Had he been using her? Worse, had she been making a fool of herself this whole time, thinking she'd stumbled across something really special?
He released a weighted sigh and turned to her. "I'm sorry, Katy. I really thought I was ready to take this to the next level, but it turns out I'm not."
She studied his face, looking for any sign that might hint he wasn't serious. She found nothing but a blank slate of granite. "Oh." Bitter emotions welled inside her. She couldn't believe she'd been so wrong about him. But she obviously had been, and it hurt to look at him now. "Then I guess you should go."
"I…" He pressed his lips into a hard line, and she could tell it was difficult for him to speak. But obviously easier than keeping their relationship. "I should go."
He turned and hurried out the door.
Katy stared at the spot he'd occupied only moments before, her heart a bleak, empty shell. A tear formed and ran down her cheek. Then another. Then more, as her grief swallowed her.
She'd never recover from the hole he'd left in her heart.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Several hours later, Katy had composed herself into some semblance of who she'd been before. At least on the outside.
Maybe all those years of living safely had been the wisest choice. She'd certainly never had to endure pain like this before.
She headed out of Janet's office and through the maze of cubicles, passing by her old desk. The four half-walls might not have been the choicest office space in the building, but she'd managed to work there just fine. Several of her co-workers eyed her with envy as she passed. They thought she had it made. They hated her for what she'd accomplished, when really they had no right.
No matter. They'd learn the truth after the holiday.
She reached the administrative suite and entered the quiet sanctuary. Winward awaited her decision.
One of the men directly under Winward passed. She smiled, but he barely gave her a nod. Funny, but it didn't seem to matter which side of the fence a person was on. There were those on both sides who were miserable. Position, money even, obviously didn't make a person happy.
It was up to each of them to ensure their own happiness. How had she not realized this? Getting Janet's job wouldn't fill the empty spots in her life.
&n
bsp; What made her happy was the knowledge she was free to live her life as she chose. If nothing else, Scott had given her this.
She nodded to Winward's assistant as she passed. "He's expecting me."
"Yes, Katy. Go on back."
Winward sat in his chair much like he had that first day he'd summoned her to his office. It was amazing how much had changed in her life since that fateful day. One thing she learned was that Mr. Winward was a person like everyone else with wants and needs, and yes, an ego the size of Texas.
Her boss looked up. "Katy. Have a seat. I'm guessing you have an answer for me."
"I do." She inhaled and let the weight on her chest carry the air away, knowing she didn't really have a choice in the matter, not if she wanted to enjoy her life. "I can't accept."
Mr. Winward's eyebrows shot upward. "Are you sure?" He blinked a few times. "This is a huge salary increase for you, Katy. Promotions like that don't come along very often in a person's life."
She folded her hands to keep them from shaking. She couldn't believe she was actually turning him down, either, but she had no doubt it was the right choice. "It's not that I don't want the promotion, Mr. Winward. I do, and I know I would do an excellent job for you. It's the conditions of the offer."
"Scott."
"Not so much Scott, but the fact that I'm giving up control of my personal life to my job. I'll happily give you eight or more hours a day, but when I walk out that door, I need to own my life. I'm sorry this puts you in a spot. I understand the whole conflict of interest thing and certainly understand why you can't promote me if I don't agree to your terms."
Her boss shook his head. "This is all very interesting, Katy. I heard a rumor this afternoon that you and Scott had already decided to call it quits, so why not just take the job?"
Damn gossip mill. "Like I said, Scott really isn't the point. I refuse to give up my freedom for my job. If it's not Scott, it may be something or someone else down the line."
He studied her for a moment, then shrugged. "If that's your decision, then there's nothing much I can do."
Her stomach sank as she rose. "Thank you for understanding. And thank you again for the opportunity." She walked across the plush carpet toward the door and stopped. "If you don't mind me asking, Mr. Winward. Was it Nina Compton who told you about my relationship with Scott? I'd just like to know who I shouldn't consider a friend."
"I appreciate your question. Whenever you're in business, it's good to know who your friends are and who your enemies are. But no, it wasn't Nina. The information actually came from my wife. She works with a friend of yours at the community college, and you came up in a casual conversation one day."
Bile rose in her throat. "Oh. I see." That was no casual conversation, and Katy had no doubt Sienna had sabotaged her on purpose. "Thanks again, Mr. Winward. Please keep me in mind if any other positions come open."
"Will do."
By the time she made it back to Janet's office, everything was tinted a bright shade of scarlet. She picked up her phone and dialed Sienna's cell. "You'd better answer, because if I have to see you in person, you may not live."
Her friend answered on the second ring. "Katy. I'm glad you called. I've been wondering if you're okay."
Sure she was. She knew the kind of destruction her words could cause and was probably curious about the fallout. "Of course I am. Why wouldn't I be?"
Awkward silence crept across the line. "I don't know. I guess, of course, you'd be fine." The tone of Sienna's voice might as well have been a confession.
"I did have an interesting conversation today."
"With Scott?" There was that, too.
"No, with Mr. Winward. Apparently, you work with his wife."
"Winward?" She paused for a moment as though thinking. "I suppose that could be Glenna Winward."
"Cut the crap, Sienna. I know what you told her about me and Scott. And I know you did it to sabotage my relationship with him."
More silence. "I did it for you, Katy. To keep you from getting hurt. You didn't have a relationship with him. He was just using you."
"How the hell would you know that? You don't know him at all."
"We both know what he's like."
Heated blood hammered through her veins. "This makes me sick, Sienna. You make me sick. You don't know Scott, and I obviously don't know you as well as I thought." She had to hang up. "I sincerely hope you were trying to protect me, and this didn't come from some jealous seed growing inside you. If you did it out of love, there may come a day we can be friends again, but right now, I can't talk to you anymore."
She hung up the phone and grabbed her keys. She'd had all she could take. She'd managed to lose a friend, a promotion, and worse, the man she loved all in one day. Add into the mixture that it was two days before Christmas, and she had the perfect reason to want to escape her life.
If she wasn't worried she'd run into Scott at Swallow's, she'd stop by and get totally smashed.
* * *
Katy called work the following day and let them know she was taking some personal time. Most people would only work a half day anyway on Christmas Eve, and she couldn't stomach watching everyone gloat at her losses. Nina would be the worst.
It was after nine when she rolled out of bed, her head pounding like none other. She'd had a restless, tear-filled night, and she was certain the pain she felt now was worse than her hangover.
She cursed when the doorbell rang before she'd had time to pour her first cup of coffee. She really should watch her language, she thought as she trudged to the door. It wasn't like her to have such a potty mouth, but sometimes, it felt so damn good to toss out a cussword. Like damn. She said it aloud, just because she could.
She peeked out the window to find Sienna's gold Taurus parked in her drive.
"Damn." She slid the deadbolt and unlocked the door, a burst of icy air rushing in as she opened it. "I don't have anything to say to you."
"Please, I need to say something." Her friend stood before her, eyes wet and swollen, a wretched look on her face.
She wanted to slam the door, but she couldn't do it. "Fine. But only because you look such a mess."
Her friend wiped her eyes as new tears started to fall. "I am a mess. A horrible mess." Her voice trembled, and Katy actually felt sorry for the woman who'd been her lifelong friend.
Sienna took a deep breath before continuing. "You're right, Katy. What I did was wrong. So wrong."
She nodded, but didn't interrupt.
"I was jealous." Sienna rolled her red-streaked eyes. "Who am I kidding? I am jealous. It's always been the two of us who've hung out together, and then suddenly, you get a cool promotion and a hot guy, and all in the same day. I felt like all the exciting things were happening to you, and I let it get to me." She exhaled a shudder. "I did tell Glenna Winward. Oh, God." Her tears fell faster now.
Katy's anger faded and pity occupied the space. "I thought we were friends. Why would you do that to me?"
"I don't know. It was such a stupid thing." A nasally sound accented her words. She walked into Katy's kitchen, and Katy followed. Her friend grabbed a tissue and blew her nose before continuing. "I'd run into Lily Winchester at the market, and she brought up Scott and you. She'd heard that Scott intended to propose. She knew we were friends, and she wondered if he'd already popped the question," she said in a rush of misery.
Katy sagged against the counter, shocked. "He was going to propose?"
"He hasn't?" She glanced at Katy's left hand, her brows rising. "Oh, God. Now I've ruined that, too."
Katy shook her head, dazed, only part of her recognizing the utter misery on her friend's face.
"You were a friend, Katy. I was a wretched, jealous beast, and I'm so, so sorry. I know I can't ask you to forgive me, but I had to apologize. I had to tell you the truth."
He'd intended to propose. Tears filled her eyes now, too. She held open her arms, overcome by emotion and unable to speak. Sienna walked into her embrace,
and she held her friend tight. "Thank you for telling me this," she whispered.
Sienna pulled away, sniffing back more tears. "I'm sorry I've been so horrible."
She nodded. "We've been friends forever, and I guess it's about time we admit we're just as human as everyone else. We're allowed to make mistakes. In fact, if we're not out there trying things, making mistakes and learning from them, then we're not really living, are we?"
As far as she could tell, she'd made a huge blunder taking Scott at face value. He'd lied when he'd told her he wasn't ready to be serious, but she knew without a doubt he'd done it because he loved her.
A swelling ball of happiness warmed her insides. He loved her. And she loved him.
And she knew the perfect way to show him how much she cared.
There was just one thing she needed to take care of first.
* * *
Katy pulled into the familiar drive. Her parents would be surprised to see her. They were expecting to meet with her later at her Aunt Lana's house for their traditional Christmas Eve party. But, as her mother was soon to find out, things would be different this year.
Her boots made tracks in the newly fallen snow glistening on the sidewalk. Just like she was making new, unpredictable tracks in her life. But, deep down in her soul, her decisions felt good.
She opened the door, preparing herself for the worst, but hoping for the best. Her mom acted out of love, not spite.
A pile of gifts sat next to the front door. Offerings to take to the party. Placing them by the door was another tradition her mother had started after the year she'd forgotten all the presents. Katy smiled at the memory.
She found her parents in their bedroom, her father sitting on the handmade Christmas quilt that covered the bed and her mom spraying on perfume.
"Katy?" Her mom managed to sound surprised and worried at the same time. "What are you doing here? It's Christmas Eve. You should be getting ready for the party."
Katy sat on their bed. "I'm not going this year."
Her father furrowed his brows.
"Why on earth not?" Deep concern lined her mother's forehead.
"Mom. Dad. There's something I need to say, and I really need you to listen and to hear me, okay?"