When he got back, she was sitting on the bed, still wrapped in the towel. Waiting. He took the packets of condoms out of his pocket, laying them on the side table, and she nodded, smiling. The light from the lamp by the bedside caressed her face.
‘Get undressed.’ Hannah didn’t move. This time she wanted to watch.
As he pulled his T-shirt over his head, she gave a smiling nod, as if she liked what she saw. He was ready for her now, and Matt hoped it wasn’t too soon. But as he stripped his jeans off her smile broadened. Hannah stood, letting the towel fall to the floor, watching his reaction. That pleased her too.
Sliding carefully, slowly inside her was a new pleasure, because he could see her face. Moving until they were both lost in the moment. A thin sheen of perspiration began to form on her brow, and he felt sweat trickle down his back.
This time he felt her orgasm. Saw her face, and the way her hair spread across the pillow. It tipped him over the edge as surely as her voice in the darkness had done. Afterwards, they lay for a long time, curled up on the bed, the heat of the night too fierce for anything other than a sheet to cover them.
Finally Hannah moved. ‘I’m thirsty. Would you like something?’
‘I’ll go.’ Matt tore himself away from her, putting on his jeans and walking through to the sitting room, where there was a small refrigerator, stacked with drinks. Picking up two glasses, he put them down on the bedside table, leaning over to touch her cheek with the can from the fridge.
‘Ow!’ She yelped, sitting up and then caught the can from his hand, pressing it against her cheek again. ‘That’s really nice.’
Heat and cold. Two more opposites to explore maybe. Next time. Matt usually didn’t make any promises to himself about a next time, but it was impossible that there shouldn’t be one. They had a long, long way to go before tonight was finished.
He sat down on the bed, pouring the drinks, aware that Hannah was watching him. Being watched usually bothered him, but for the moment he couldn’t remember why. She took the glass, pulling the sheet up around her.
‘I see your shoulder.’ She was sipping her drink, looking at him steadily.
Now he remembered. Being with Hannah was like drawing a line between now and then—before Hannah, and after Hannah. But suddenly the past broke through, snapping ferociously at his heels.
Most people didn’t even notice the dark mark on the back of his shoulder, and if they did he lied about the cause. The scar was so old now, hidden from his view when he faced himself in the mirror, that he could afford to ignore it. But Hannah had seen more in the way of injuries than most, and anyway telling her anything but the absolute truth would be a betrayal so outrageous that he couldn’t even think about it.
‘I’m not asking you to talk about it, Matt. But I want you to know that I see it and that...whatever happened to you, I wish it hadn’t.’
Her eyes filled with tears suddenly. She knew. But even now, Matt couldn’t let go of the secret he’d kept from everyone.
‘What do you think happened?’ It wasn’t fair to ask her to take all the risks, but Matt couldn’t go there unless Hannah led him. Maybe she wouldn’t. Maybe she’d want to believe that he’d fallen out of a tree when he was a kid...
She moved, pushing the pillows behind her so that she could sit up a little straighter.
‘You carry your shoulder a little differently...lower than the other one. That’s probably the result of it having been dislocated. It’s not that obvious...’
‘And...?’ It was poor encouragement to go on, but it was all that Matt could give.
‘The mark on your shoulder...’
‘When did you see that?’ Suddenly it was important, and Matt didn’t know why.
‘Just now. I didn’t see it when we were swimming.’ She leaned towards him, planting a kiss on his cheek. ‘I was enjoying the rest of the view too much.’
That was what he wanted to hear. That Hannah had only just seen this, and that her reaction had been to ask almost immediately. That she’d cared enough to want to know.
‘What do you think the mark is?’
‘It’s a burn, and it looks as if it happened some time ago, probably when you were a child.’ She hesitated and Matt nodded her on. ‘I saw a mark once that was exactly that shape, when someone accidentally burned themselves with the tip of an iron. I may be wrong...’
‘You’re not wrong. And it wasn’t accidental.’
Her eyes filled with tears. ‘I’m so sorry, Matt. I know you don’t want to talk about it.’
Suddenly that was all he wanted to do. Hannah had reached in and found his secret, and she’d had the courage to tell him that she knew. The heart to cry for him. Matt curled up on the bed, laying his head in her lap.
‘I want to tell you about it...’
She held him, giving him the strength to haltingly begin the story. His father’s rage and his mother’s tears. The more he talked, safe in Hannah’s arms, the easier it became.
‘My mother took it all. Until I was eight years old.’
‘What happened then?’
‘He came home early from work one day. I was in the kitchen with my mother, she was doing the ironing. When she heard the front door slam, she told me to go and play in the garden, and went out into the sitting room. But I didn’t. I listened at the door, and heard him shouting at her, about something that had happened at work. I knew what it sounded like when he hit her, I’d heard that often enough before...’
He couldn’t go on. Hannah waited, holding him. It would be quite okay if he stopped here, she’d understand. The knowledge gave him the strength to continue.
‘For the first time, I didn’t try to hide. I ran into the sitting room and attacked him, but of course he was far too strong for me. He picked me up, and took me into the kitchen, locking the door behind us. I could hear my mother, begging him to let me go and promising she’d do anything he wanted if he didn’t hurt me. He told me he’d give me something to help me remember that I was never to do that again...’
‘He burned you. With the iron.’
‘He branded me. It hurt so badly that I struggled and screamed and he yanked me up by my arm and threw me across the room, that’s when my shoulder dislocated. Then I heard the sound of glass breaking. My mother had smashed the kitchen door, and she was standing over me, with a spade from the garden in her hands. She told him she’d kill him if he ever laid a finger on me again. She was so different, like...’
He felt Hannah’s arms tighten around him. ‘Like a mother protecting her child.’
‘Yes.’ He could imagine Hannah like that if anything or anyone ever threatened Sam. Flaming with rage, like a lioness defending her cub. The thought that what had happened to him would never happen to Sam comforted him.
‘That was the last time I saw my father. He walked out of the house, and my mother picked me up and took me straight to the hospital. She was bleeding from the broken glass, and she told them some story and they patched us both up. Then she took me back out to the car, and told me that we were never going back. She left me with a neighbour while she went back to pack a few things, and then we left.’
‘It must have been...’ Another tear escaped from Hannah’s eye. ‘I can’t imagine how you must have felt.’
‘I felt as if we’d escaped. We drove for hours, all the way to London. We came to this hotel, she had family here but she was too afraid to go to them in case my father found us. We stayed here for two weeks, and I thought that this would be the beginning of a new life for us. I’d have friends, and a nice school. Everything was going to be all right.’
It had been just like now. Everything would be all right, if he just stayed here in Hannah’s arms. Matt knew he couldn’t, that they had serious work to do tomorrow, but he could still believe it for a while.
‘It wasn’t, of course. My mother’s family helped her out,
and we weren’t short of money. We moved from hotel to hotel, until we got a little house, and then after a few months we heard that my father had found us. We ran, and then he found us again, in the cottage in Wales. After that, we just kept running, never really knowing if he was following or not, but never staying in one place for more than six months.’
‘Where is she now?’
‘When I went to medical school, she decided to go to France for a year. She loved Paris, and settled there for a while. She wrote a book, loosely based on her own experiences, and to her surprise it sold. That gave her a lot of confidence, and she came back to England and started to get involved with a charity that helps battered women. She got a job as a columnist for a newspaper and... I don’t know if she’ll ever really mend. But she has a good life now, and she’s happy.’
‘That’s wonderful. I wish you’d tell me what the book’s called, I’d love to read it.’ Hannah paused, as if she wanted to ask a question but wasn’t sure how.
‘What?’ Matt moved, taking her in his arms. Now that he’d told her everything, she was the one who needed his comfort.
‘Will you ever mend? You seem to still be moving around.’
‘I’m not all that sure how else to live. I’ve mended my own life with my work.’
‘But you won’t stay, will you?’
He knew what she was asking. Matt’s departure might be soon, if the job in London came through. But that wasn’t certain yet, and this wasn’t the time for uncertainties.
‘No. I won’t stay.’
She smiled, reaching up to caress his cheek. ‘That’s okay. You know that permanence isn’t my thing either. Just as long as we’ll be friends.’
The thought that wherever he was, he could always just pick up the phone and talk to Hannah warmed him. One thread, to anchor him to the past.
‘Always, Hannah. I may walk away, but I’ll never forget you.’
A sudden crash above their heads startled them. Then Hannah grinned. ‘Thank goodness. Do you think the storm’s coming our way?’
‘Let’s hope so.’ The oppressive heat that had been building up for days now seemed to have loosened its grip a little. Matt got up, drawing the drapes back and opening the sliding doors that were cut into the expanse of glass. There was no balcony outside, just a safety rail, but it allowed cool air to filter into the room. It felt as if the temperature had just dropped by ten degrees.
‘Oh! That’s lovely.’ She ran to his side, throwing up her arms so that the breeze could bathe her body. Then suddenly a sheet of rain started to fall, blowing in through open doors. Hannah squealed, and Matt caught her in his arms, kissing her.
‘Matt! Again?’ She’d felt his erection harden against her.
It came as a surprise to him as well. Just the thought of his father was usually enough to slake any thought of being close to anyone. But his thirst for Hannah was stronger than that. He felt her move against him, turning desire into blind longing. She wanted more too.
‘It’s not me. It’s you... I can’t get enough of you, Hannah.’ A thought crossed his mind. ‘Ever made love in a storm before?’
‘If I have I don’t remember it.’ She wound her arms around his neck, lifting herself to coil her legs around his hips, in an invitation to make her remember it this time.
Thunder still rolled over their heads, feeling as if it was shaking the whole building. Then lightning, bathing the whole room in sudden brilliance. Hannah’s kiss was like the touch of a hurricane, dragging him irresistibly into its force.
‘Now... Before it goes, Matt.’
He wanted that too. He wanted to hear her scream, carried away with the force of the storm. Everything else was blotted out, and now was the only thing that seemed real...
* * *
Hannah woke, shivering in the chill of the breeze from the open doors. The storm had left clear skies in its wake, and sunshine was filtering in through the windows. She pulled the duvet up around her shoulders, snuggling against Matt.
Last night had been life-changing. The force of the storm had been nothing in comparison to the journey they’d made together, and now he was sleeping soundly, his arm slung possessively around her waist. He really had possessed her last night, in every way possible. Head and heart, along with her body.
But there was no time for that today. No time to think about how this couldn’t last. They had things to do. She leaned towards him, riffling her fingers through his hair and kissing his cheek as his eyes fluttered open.
‘Hey, sleepyhead.’ Hannah had hoped for that smile, and it was everything that she wanted it to be.
‘Hey, yourself.’ He closed his eyes, drawing her close, and then opened them again suddenly. ‘What’s the time? Did we miss the alarm?’
Hannah twisted around so that she could see the clock. ‘Six o’clock. We didn’t miss the alarm.’
‘That’s good.’ He closed his eyes again. ‘We can take our time. Get up and have breakfast. Maybe review our list, before the media centre opens at ten.’
‘Yes. We could.’ Hannah snuggled against him, holding him tight, and she saw his lips curve into a smile.
‘Or... I think you haven’t quite made me your very own creature yet. You might want to seal the deal, so that I do everything you tell me today.’
‘You’re not my creature, Matt.’ He could be easygoing when he wanted to be, and that was most of the time. But last night he’d shown a controlled mastery, which had driven her beyond anything she’d thought she knew about sex, and had taken her breath away.
‘What am I then?’
Right now he was sleepy and smiling. Hannah knew that could change in an instant.
‘You’re my...teammate with benefits.’
He chuckled. ‘High five...?’
Matt held up his hand, and she grabbed it, kissing his fingers. Finally...finally he opened his eyes again.
‘You’re thinking we should do this for the team?’ He grinned lazily at her.
‘No. Just because we want to.’
‘My sentiments exactly.’ He pulled the duvet back, throwing it onto the other side of the bed in one strong motion. The heat of their bodies would soon counteract the morning chill in the air.
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
EVERYTHING WENT BETTER and faster today. A good appetite for breakfast made it taste delicious and they stayed at the table, ordering more coffee, while they divided up the things they needed to do today. As soon as they were allowed into the media room, they sat together in their cubicle, concentrating on the screens of the laptops in front of them.
‘I think the lights are sorted. I’ve found a place that does them really cheaply, and they’re sending me through a quote that’s good for sixty days.’ Hannah wrinkled her nose. ‘Do you reckon sixty days will be enough?’
Matt shrugged. ‘We have to win this thing first. Then we can worry about the sixty days.’
‘True. How are you doing with the prefabs?’
His lip curled into a teasing smile. ‘Not too badly.’
‘What? Tell me, Matt!’
He chuckled. ‘I spoke to a few companies, and they offered to send me their best quotes. One offered ten percent off the list price, which was still far too expensive for us. So I decided that I needed to go to the top. I called the managing director’s secretary at Laurence Construction.’
‘And she spoke to you?’
‘I said I was a surgeon with an interesting proposition. I thought that a bit of mystery might help.’
Hannah laughed. ‘Yeah, okay. Go on.’
‘I told her what we were doing, and what we wanted. She said that she’d make some enquiries and get back to me, and I reckoned it was just a polite brush-off. But she called back after twenty minutes, and Sir James Laurence wants to see us. He’s not in the office today, but he’d like us to drive down to hi
s home in Sussex tomorrow morning.’
‘Really? That’s amazing. But do we have the time?’
‘It’s a risk, but I don’t see that we can afford not to take it. I told her that we were being filmed but that I’d tell the production company that we wanted to speak privately, and she said that he’d welcome the cameras as long as there were no microphones.’
‘That sounds promising. Surely he won’t want us to drive all that way just to say no to us in front of the cameras.’ Hannah thought for a moment. ‘What do you say we get all our computer work and phone calls done today, then plan a round trip tomorrow to pick up the samples we need and go and see Sir James?’
‘Yep. And we can start writing up the budget and the proposal tonight.’
‘Sounds good. I suppose we’d better get on with it then.’
* * *
They worked until six, eating lunch in their cubicle. Hannah disappeared to make her evening phone call to Sam, and when she didn’t appear in the dining room, Matt went to find her. She wasn’t in their shared sitting room, but when he went to her bedroom door, he could hear what sounded like crying. Matt knocked, and there was no answer.
‘Hannah...?’
‘I’ll be down in a minute.’ Her voice had a brittle, cracked edge to it.
‘Can I come in?’
‘I’m just combing my hair. I’ll see you downstairs.’
Right. After last night, wanting privacy to comb her hair was the worst excuse he’d heard in a long time. Matt walked over to the sofa, sat down and waited.
It took Hannah ten minutes to comb her hair, or whatever else it was she was doing. When she did appear she rushed towards the main door of the suite, obviously bound up in her own thoughts, and she didn’t even see him.
‘Hannah.’
‘Oh!’ She gave a yelp of surprise, and whirled around. Matt could see that her eyes and the tip of her nose were a little pink, which would have been enchanting if they weren’t sure signs she’d been crying.
‘I didn’t see you there.’
Winning the Surgeon's Heart Page 14