by Tom Sharpe
'Seems a bit of a gloomy book to take on holiday,' said Braintree.
'Salutary,' said Wilt, 'a nice reminder that the world's always been a crazy place and that we don't have such a bad time of it teaching at the Tech. Besides, it's an antidote to the notion that intellectual aspirations get you anywhere.'
'Talking about aspirations,' said Braintree, 'what on earth are you going to do with the thirty thousand quid this lunatic philanthropist has allotted your department for textbooks?'
Wilt smiled into his pint of best bitter. 'Lunatic philanthropists' was just about right for the Americans with their airbases and nuclear weapons, and the educated idiots in the State Department who assumed that even the most ineffectual liberal do-gooder must be a homicidal Stalinist and a member of the KGBand who then shelled out billions of dollars trying to undo the damage they'd done.
'Well, for one thing I'm going to donate two hundred copies of Lord of the Flies to Inspector Flint,' he said finally.
'To Flint? Why him of all people? What's he want with the damned things?'
'He's the one who told Eva I was out at...' Wilt stopped. There was no point in breaking the Official Secrets Act. 'It's a prize,' he went on, 'for the first copper to arrest the Phantom Flasher. It seems an appropriate title.'
'I daresay it does,' said Braintree. 'Still, two hundred copies is a bit disproportionate. I can't imagine even the most literate policeman wanting to read two hundred copies of the same book.'
'He can always hand them out to the poor sods at the airbase. Must be hell trying to cope with Mavis Mottram. Not that I disagree with her views but the bloody woman is definitely demented.'
'Still leaves you with a hell of a lot of new books to buy,' said Braintree. 'I mean, it's all right for me because the English Department needs books but I shouldn't have thought Communication and'
'Don't use those words. I'm going back to Liberal Studies and to hell with all that bloody jargon. And if Mayfield and the rest of the social-economic structure merchants don't like it, they can lump it. I'm having it my way from now on.'
'You sound very confident,' said Braintree.
'Yes,' said Wilt with a smile.
And he was.
The End
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Document ID: ffa1ae6a-2744-4a1f-be25-d3ae4d7c0e95
Document version: 1
Document creation date: 4.2.2012
Created using: calibre 0.8.10 software
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Tom Sharpe
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