Have a Heart 2

by Rachel Burns

  Brianna moved so she was sitting up. She was wearing a pajama with a V-neck top. She knew that her scar was visible with this pajama, but if she covered it up, he would think that she was over sensitive about what had happened. So she sat there with her dilemma and did nothing.

  She finally remembered to answer him. “I’m fine – and you?”

  “I’m fine, thanks. Here is your report card, straight A’s as always.” He jumped to his feet.

  He was having a lot of trouble not looking at her breasts. Her scar was acting like an arrow pointing them out. He had a picture in his head of him ripping her blouse open. His picture was fading and changing back to the reality of her being disgusted with him to the fantasy that it was becoming. He remembered what her breast had looked like. They were beautiful. “Enjoy the weekend.” Then he was gone.

  “That went well,” Brianna said to herself sarcastic after he had left.

  Brianna and Cathy hadn’t been spending that much time together lately because of studying for finals. Brianna went to her room to see if she wanted to do something today. She knocked, and then she heard the voices. Scott was in there with her.

  Cathy opened the door a crack and smiled at her. “I need a moment. I’ll stop by in a bit.”

  Brianna nodded and turned away. She regretted her behavior from that day so much.

  She went into the bathroom and washed her face.

  Why hadn’t she just kept that tiny bit of information to herself? So he touched her while she slept. Big deal.

  A couple of other girls were talking in the bathroom. They had gotten permission from Scott to go into town.

  “Do you mind if I join you?” Brianna asked.

  “Not at all, the more the merrier.”

  “I have to let Scott know, where I am.”

  “I’ll tell him. I hurt my ankle last week playing tennis. I have to stay,” Stephanie told her.

  Brianna wrote a note for Cathy and stuck it on her door. She grabbed her purse and left with the others.

  They all enjoyed the sun as they walked slowly into town. Brianna was already starting to play with the idea of coming back late so he would have to punish her. Then she probably wouldn’t feel so guilty anymore, and he would have to talk to her. The girls went their separate ways.

  Brianna went to the bookstore and asked for sheet music. She sat down at a table and started going through the boxes they had there. She found the song that she had been looking for right away. Even a couple others that she wanted. She paid for them and told another girl that she was going back to the dorms.

  She went right to the music room and played the song that meant so much to her. It was an older song, but she had heard it on the radio once, and she felt that it fit to her too. It was about a father visiting his son, who was dying from AIDS. The father had accepted his son just the way he was. She remembered feeling jealous as she heard it. She had looked up the song and sang along, but now she could play it whenever she wanted. The theme was an ever-present one for her, dying.

  Who would be there for her when it was her time? It was clear that she wouldn’t live to a ripe old age.

  She kept an eye on the clock. She still wasn’t sure if she wanted to get into trouble or not. If she did, then it would be better to get into trouble for a lesser crime. Him not knowing where she was had made him so mad. It would be a repeated offense if she did it again. That would mean that he would really let her have it.

  She cleaned up and went to supper. She had missed lunch. That meant she had missed her tablets too. She even had extras in her purse. If it somehow came out, she would lie and say that she had taken those. Her heart was racing not because of lack of pills but for fear of being caught.

  She ate with the others. Cathy wasn’t there. Was she mad? She wanted to hurry back and talk to her.

  Scott was in the lounge talking to one of the girls about her possibilities of going on to another school after graduating from here.

  Brianna quietly walked past them and dropped her stuff off in her own room, and then she went to Cathy’s door. She knocked and got no answer. She went back to her room and listened to some music, leaving her door open, and so she could see Cathy when she did come back.

  Cathy still wasn’t there. She didn’t come back on time.

  Brianna didn’t want to point this out to Scott, but she was worrying. She knocked on a couple of doors and asked everyone in quiet whispers if they had seen her. No one had. She pulled her nerve together and went to Scott’s room. Cathy was already an hour late.

  She knocked softly. He too had his door open. She glanced around in case Cathy was there. He looked up at her surprised. He raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t say anything.

  Scott was still trying to decide what to do about her leaving without getting his permission, but with the way things stood in between them, it would have been too hard for her to face him. He blamed himself. She was so sweet and innocent, that needed to be protected as long as possible.

  “Hello, Scott. I was just wondering if you knew where Cathy was.”

  “I don’t know. I haven’t seen her since she followed you into town.”

  Brianna shook her head. “I wasn’t in town all that long. I went to the bookstore and bought some music, and then I came back here to the music rooms. I didn’t see her at all, and she wasn’t at supper. I’m worried.”

  He jumped up and ran past her. “Attention everyone,” he called out loudly. “We’re looking for Cathy. Did anyone see her in town today?”

  He unlocked her room and went in. She wasn’t there.

  No one had seen her.

  He pulled out his cell and called the police. Then he called the Dean to babysit. He was gone in a flash.

  “If only I had waited for her.” Brianna was rocked with guilt. “She would have waited for me.”

  Scott got in his car and drove around town looking for Cathy. In his heart, he already knew what had happened. He kept his eyes on the sidewalks. She wasn’t just late, something had happened. He drove slowly with his eyes open. His heart was beating so loudly.

  He drove by the park and saw her sitting on a bench. She was crying. He was so relieved to see her. Thank god Brianna had told him. He would have to thank her later.

  He parked and ran to her. “Cathy, tell me what happened.” He looked at her bruised face. She had been beaten badly. He was already dialing the police when he heard something behind him. He gave Cathy the phone and nodded at her, wanting her to call the police while he kept this guy busy.

  “Get away from my girlfriend. She’s mine.”

  “I wasn’t going to hurt her. She is my baby sister.” Scott kept his eye on her.

  “Are you the brother that told her to stay away from me last year over Christmas vacation. You even spanked her. How dare you stick your nose in our business?”

  “I worry about her. Why don’t you calm down, and we can talk about a few things?” Scott was holding his hands in front of him trying to calm down the obviously drunk man.

  “I don’t want to talk to you. I want to talk to her. That bitch has got it coming. She just won’t listen to me.”

  “I understand. She has a big problem listening. Tell me what she did, and I can talk to her. We may even have to inform my parents. They could set her straight for you too.” Scott felt that this acting would be the only way to calm him down. He needed to stay in between him and Cathy.

  “Would they do that?” He looked interested.

  “Of course. I have three sisters, and this is the one that gives me the most problems. I am constantly looking after her, like right now. She should be at school, but no, I have to drive all over town and look for her.” Scott shook his head, like he was disappointed in her. He could hear her talking softly to the police. “A woman just has to learn her place, especially a southern woman. If they don’t, they disgrace themselves and their loved ones. Tell me what she did this time.”

  “She won’t stay put. She should have stayed at
school with me. Now we both can’t go. The bitch messed up my whole life.” He tried to charge at Cathy again who shrieked.

  Scott plowed into him, sending him flying.

  He had so much alcohol in him that he jumped right back to his feet. Hardly feeling the pain. He went for Scott again. Fists were flying, and Cathy screamed for help.

  “Let me at her, let me at that bitch.” He kicked and hit at Scott. Scott brought his fist up and got him in the jaw. He fell to the ground just as the police arrived. Scott backed away from him, holding his hands up high.

  The police handcuffed Scott and put him in a car. “My sister, make sure my sister gets to the hospital,” he called out. Paramedics were already taking care of her. Others were taking care of her ex-boyfriend.

  The police dragged them all to the station. Cathy leaned on Scott’s chest and cried. Someone opened his handcuffs, and he wrapped his arms around her and held her tightly.

  Cathy was forced to tell the police what had happened. Her ex-boyfriend spotted her as soon as she came out of school. She noticed him and tried to go back, but he grabbed her and pulled her into his car.

  He parked the car in the woods where he scolded her for a long time, and then he beat her. He had wanted to rape her, but she kicked him in the groin so often that he couldn’t. She ran back to town, but she just couldn’t run anymore. He had hurt her leg.

  She decided to sit down and wait for her brother. She was sure that he would come.

  Scott insisted that she be brought to the hospital. He went with her to the hospital after they had both finished giving their statements. Cathy was very clear. She wanted to press charges. Scott was very proud of her. He called their parents and then the Dean and explained what had happened. He told the Dean that he would be staying with his sister.

  Scott returned to the floor. He figured that the truth was out now. The Dean had babysat again. Everyone would have been told that Cathy was his sister. He started to worry that the others would shut her out because they knew that. She didn’t need any extra grief.

  He passed by Brianna’s door, which was open on the way to his own room. He peeked in and saw that she was in there. One less thing to worry about.

  “Scott, you’re back. How is Cathy?” Gretchen asked him.

  Brianna heard her Gretchen saying Scott’s name and flew to the door.

  “She will be just fine. Back in time for classes and everything. I’ll tell her you asked about her.” He moved on down the hall, not wanting to talk about it. He went into his room and sat down at his desk.

  Brianna followed him. She knocked on his door frame. He turned and saw her standing there. The girl he had been trying so hard to avoid for such a long time.

  Brianna was very upset with herself. “I’m so sorry. It was all my fault if I would have just waited for her. Please tell her how sorry I am.”

  “Brianna,” he sighed. “It wasn’t your fault.”

  “Of course it was. If only I had waited, then she wouldn’t have been alone like that. She only went because of me. I am clearly the one to blame.”

  “He was waiting for her. He would have gotten to her one way or the other.”

  “I could have gotten help.”

  “Stop it,” Scott yelled. He seriously didn’t need this. He calmed himself down before he spoke further, pinching the bridge of his nose like he had a headache. “If you had been with her, he would have hurt you too. You didn’t do anything wrong. I need a moment to myself, please leave me alone.”

  Brianna nodded and turned to leave. “I bet Cathy doesn’t see it that way.”

  “No one is blaming you, Brianna,” he called after her.

  Brianna nodded as she left. She went back to her room and closed the door. She knew that if Cathy hadn’t been alone, that she wouldn’t have gotten beaten up to the point that she had to go to the hospital. What she had done was unforgivable.

  Brianna snuck out of the floor and went to see the Dean, telling him what she had done. He told her the same thing that Scott had. He even let her call Cathy with his phone. Cathy didn’t want to hear about anything being Brianna’s fault either. She told her that she was fine, but that she had sprained her ankle. She would be back tomorrow. They could talk then.

  “Sir, could I call my dad?” She knew that he would blame her. Maybe even enough to punish her. She needed that to help her clean her slate. The Dean nodded and left his office.

  “Hello, Daddy, here is Brianna.”

  “How are you feeling, sweetheart? Is everything okay?”

  “No, it isn’t. I did something really terrible. It’s all my fault.”

  “What did you do?” His voice turned from concerned to very serious. She had his complete attention.

  “Did you hear about what happened to Cathy?”

  “Yes, we did, but that wasn’t your fault.” His voice was back to sounding concerned.

  “Yes, it is. I went to town with the other girls, and I didn’t wait the five minutes to go with her. She would have waited for me, but I couldn’t do it for her.”

  “Of all the stupid things I’ve heard you say in your life, I think that takes the cake. If you had waited for her, then there would just be two girls laying in the hospital instead of one. He might have killed you.”

  “Dad, my place was at her side. She has always been there for me.”

  “Darling, maybe it was your instinct warning you. Honey, I don’t even want to hear you thinking about being by that madman. Trust me, you would have been no match for him. He would have just hurt you too.” He paused like he was thinking about something. “Where are you calling from?”

  “The Dean’s office,” she answered meekly.

  “Scott thought your problem was stupid too, right?”

  “I – Well, I guess so.”

  “Get Martin on the phone. Goodbye, sweetheart.”

  “Goodbye, Dad.”

  Brianna went out in the hall and waved for the Dean. “He wants to talk to you.”

  The Dean smiled at her, and then he laid a hand on her back pushing her gently in with him. “What can I do for you Charles? – I see – I’ll talk to her. Give my love to Eva. Goodbye.”

  Brianna got another talking too. No one was taking her seriously.

  Cathy returned the next day. She had a huge smile on her face because she finally felt free of her ex-boyfriend. “He’s in a Texas jail. It will be forever before they let him out,” she told Brianna excitedly.

  “I’m happy he can’t bother you anymore, but I still feel very badly about not waiting for you,” Brianna confessed.

  “What, no. I’m glad you weren’t there. He was as drunk as a skunk. God only knows what he would have done to you.” she saw that her words were having no effect on her friend’s guilt. She laid her hands on her shoulders. “Brianna, please, I understand that you just wanted to get away from Scott.”

  “I think I should just talk to Scott and clear the air. This is even hurting the people around us.”

  “That’s a good idea. Have a nice long talk with Scott.” Cathy hoped that they would each confess that they liked the other one. She had seen Brianna’s eyes watching her brother too. They were both attracted to each other.

  Brianna had brushed her hair about eight times already. She was sitting on her bed and waiting for Scott to show up with her new schedule. Cathy had agreed to say that she was tired, so he would have to bring it himself. Brianna had nervously brushed her teeth a couple of times too.

  The floor meeting had ended over an hour ago. She got up to look into the mirror once again. She wanted to make sure that she had completely removed the toothpaste from her mouth and teeth.

  Brianna looked over her room. It was as neat as a pin. He had given a little lecture at the meeting about room cleanliness. She waited and waited, but he didn’t come. Her eyes would droop shut, and her head would sink forward. She would then awake with a start, telling herself that he would be here any second now.

  Brianna kept nod
ding off, but she fought against it. She tried to hear if he was spanking someone, but then she couldn’t hear anything. Her eyes darted to the clock every few seconds.

  She would look at it several times before a minute would change to the next one.

  It was eleven at night. This was weird. She peeked out into the hall. It was dark and quiet.

  Had he forgotten her?

  She quietly tiptoed down the hall to his room.

  It was clear that he had. So much for her crush liking her back. She knocked softly on his door. Soft enough that he wouldn’t hear her if he was sleeping, she thought.

  He opened the door and squinted at the light. She stared at his chest. It was bare. She had never seen him half dressed before, and it was hard for her to look away.

  “What’s wrong?” Scott asked.

  “You forgot me,” she said lamely. Tears pricked her eyes at how true her words were.

  Scott saw her tears and felt like such a jerk. He hadn’t forgotten her. He had purposely tried to avoid her. Had she been waiting up all this time? It was a quarter after eleven now.

  He left her standing there and went to his desk and got her schedule. “Sorry, here you go. Again it’s better without expectations. Good night.” He closed his door, no longer able to look into her watery eyes.

  Brianna stood where she was a little shocked. She had to take a sharp breath not to cry right there on the spot. She felt like he had slapped her. He must really hate her. He blamed her too.

  She hurried back to her room before her tears spilled over, locking herself in and crying on her bed. She scolded herself for going to his room and bugging him and for believing that he had maybe like her and had touched her on purpose.

  Most likely she should be thankful that she got touched that way. No other man would ever do it again. She would die an old maid. She should be thankful that she had one sexual memory. Her first and last. She cried for hours.

  Scott couldn’t believe how rude he had been to her. She had waited and waited for him, and he was an ass for not showing up. And then she shows up, and he practically slams the door in her face.