Allie’s grandmother was training her ma in the same fashion as Mrs. Richardson’s children. Her grandmother was working towards bettering her ma’s life. How she came to wed Pa, she didn’t know yet, but hoped she was getting closer to that answer. Allie opened the journal and read the next entry dated December tenth, one thousand eight hundred eighty-two.
Oh, mother is pushing me. Christmas is right around the corner and I am working to make sure all of the gifts are made and ready, but mother keeps pulling me away to focus on lessons. I am not sure why she seems to be so determined that I learn all of this as quickly as possible, but Helen just marrying might have something to do with it.
I overheard mother and father speaking in private about my age and needing to cautiously guide me through this delicate portion of my life to ensure an appropriate outcome. I’m not sure what outcome they are hoping for.
Helen procured a suitor and now a husband when her parents held her first ball to introduce their daughter to the available gentlemen. Being of a lower class, I am aware I will not enjoy the same. How mother and father plan to wed me to someone above us is beyond me. I really don’t care about the money or life, I simply want love. I have seen what love looks like amongst some of the other staff and others in the community. I’ve seen it enough to know that I much prefer that over the life of wealth. True happiness could not always be found within the higher class.
Now I’m rambling and wasting my time on my gift making. I am crocheting a lap blanket for Helen in the colors she chose for her wedding. I hope she will think of her wedding and smile every time she uses it.
For William, their oldest child and only son, I am knitting a scarf to go with a new suit he just purchased. He is four years older than I and preparing to start his own life.
Cassie, the youngest, and younger than myself by a year, will be getting stationary that I am making. I dried rose petals from last summer and am pressing them into the paper. Her gift is my favorite to work on. Each page is unique and beautiful. I must go and continue my work since mother has decided to leave me be for now, being that it is the Sabbath and lessons are withheld.
Allie smiled at the thought of her ma working on those gifts. She loved to make things with her hands, and now she knew how she developed her skills for her embroidery and quilting that she continued. It seemed Ma had many talents, some Allie hadn’t known before. She continued reading with the next entry dated December fifteenth one thousand eight hundred eighty-two.
Did I meet my future husband today? Mother allowed me to venture into town with William as chaperone and purchase more yarn. I failed to purchase enough to finish my blanket project for Helen and was worrying that I wouldn’t have time to finish it. At least I don’t have to spin my own and can afford to buy it.
William saw me safe and sound to the entrance of the shop, but refused to go in. Instead he said he had his own shopping to do and would retrieve me soon. Since I knew exactly what I needed, my purchase didn’t take any time at all.
I stepped out and decided to wait for him, not knowing exactly how long that might take. After standing only a few minutes a young man approached me. He had such a warmth to his smile and light in his eyes. I was lost for words for a moment and was nervous at first, not knowing him, but he was so kind.
He was concerned for me being alone. I told him about William and he decided he would wait with me until he returned. Oh, the way he cared for me and spoke to me with interest in what I had to say. No man had ever cared what I thought on most matters before. After I had carried on so, he asked me all kinds of questions and truly wanted my opinions. He was very sweet and handsome. Mother is going to be irate, but we made plans to meet again. I don’t know much about him, but I plan to learn everything. We arranged a time to meet after Christmas and now I must find a way to make that work!
Nothing else was written for that day and Allie was extremely curious to know who this man was. She knew her ma and pa met while passing by on the street. One meeting lead to more which led to marriage. This sounded like it was Pa. She turned the page and found it dated after Christmas, December twenty eighth one thousand eight hundred eighty-two.
Christmas is always a busy time with preparations for the Richardson’s annual feasting. The twenty-fifth is spent with just family, the twenty-sixth is a lavish party for their closest friends, and the twenty-seventh is a celebration for the staff. They allow the staff to take over the dining room and have a full Christmas meal. The staff still prepares it all first, though.
I am tired. I don’t normally help in the kitchen, but when times get busy, I do what I can. Mother doesn’t like me having to do any work that toughens my hands or makes me perspire, but I refuse to be served by my friends and equals, regardless of what mother wishes.
Now that all of that is over, I can finally relax. There will be no more lessons until after the New Year. I am free to do what I wish. Normally, I lay around and read, recouping from the laborious work.
The whole staff gets the time off, except for the essentials that must be done to keep the house running. Today was the day I was to meet my future. I spoke to Mother about taking a stroll through the city park. She refused at first, of course, stating that I needed a chaperone and she wasn’t up for it just after the last three days.
I had already enlisted Helen, who agreed during Christmas. Helen was married now and could serve as chaperone. On the walk to the park, I explained to Helen my original motives for wanting to visit the park. She was angry at first, but upon telling her my last story, she decided she needed to meet the boy. I’d struck her curiosity.
When we arrived, I noticed he was already waiting for me. I made the introductions. Helen sat on the end of the bench and allowed me to sit in the middle. We conversed for an hour before he needed to take his leave. I learned about his family and how he grew up and he learned about mine. Helen seemed interested but remained mostly silent.
He asked if we could meet again and Helen answered for me. She is going to allow us to meet again at her home, under her supervision, of course. On the way home, she talked about how she felt when she first met her husband. She claimed that she could see that in me. Mother can’t know. I am sure she wouldn’t approve, even though everything will stay proper. I am not sure what will happen with this, but I can’t wait to find out.
Allie closed the book feeling sweetly sad. Her parents had talked about how they met, but they left out so many details. Sweet details. Both Ma and Pa were hard working folks. They had been hardened on the outside from a tough life.
Allie would have never guessed this was their start. She was overjoyed getting to hear it now. If she could continue to read she would, but the supper hour was drawing near and she had work to do. She set the journal on the table for another time and went back to work, with the words of her ma replaying in her head and a smile upon her face.
CHAPTER 28
Over the next few days Allie continued taking naps in the afternoon. She had been through much in the last several weeks and Frank was thankful she was resting. Tears had been a regular occurrence. Frank had witnessed the grieving process from an outsider’s perspective may times.
Being a doctor allowed him to see the beginnings and endings of life. He saw joy and grief on a regular basis. The more times he witnessed it, the more a wall went up. He was increasingly able to separate himself from such grief, mostly. His emotions were present, but not at the level in which the loved ones experienced. Watching his beloved go through it broke his heart. One minute she would be fine, smiling, and the next something would spark a memory or thought and she would either cry or become angry. He didn’t take any of it personally, but he did hope that this portion would soon end.
Today was no different. By the middle of the day, Allie had already circled through her emotions twice. Frank was trying to be patient, but he found he needed a break. He was deeply saddened when Ma died, but the toll this took on Allie was crushing. Her spirit, the very essence that
made her who she was had vanished. When he thought he could see her returning she would disappear again.
Frank was tired. Knowing that grief was something no one could avoid, he knew she must work through it all. He really didn’t know how to help her, though. He hugged her when she cried, let her yell when she was angry, and tried to make her laugh as many times as he could. This afternoon he was called away from the office and wouldn’t be around to see to her needs for a while.
Roger had stopped in and summoned Frank to his house. He hadn’t said much other than Alex was sick and needed to be seen. Little kids getting sick was normal. Without knowing specifics, he wasn’t sure if he would be tending to a tummy ache from eating too many sweets or a childhood disease. He hoped it was the first or something else minor.
Walking up to his bed, his stomach sank as he knew it was the latter. Alex was pale and clammy, which were all the signs of a fever. Emma had briefed Frank on Alex’s bowel issues in addition to the fever and complaints of sore throat. Lifting his shirt revealed the rash he’d hoped he wouldn’t see. Alex had all the signs of typhoid. He patted Alex on the hand and explained that he needed to speak to his parents and then would be right back. Frank, Roger and Emma all stepped out of the room and gently closed the door behind.
“There is no easy was to say this, so I’m just going to say it. Alex has typhoid,” Frank said as he placed his hand on Roger’s shoulder.
Emma sucked in air and Roger stared unmoving.
“What, what do we do?” Emma stuttered with the swells of tears beginning.
Frank thought for a moment.
“First, we quarantine. Emma, I know you want to be with him, but you are with child. You need to think about your other children as well.”
Emma started to sob and Roger held her against him. They both stared at Frank.
“Then, we work on bringing down his fever and making him more comfortable. I have a few things I’m going to give him. One is to help with the fever. Another is to control the diarrhea. He is going to need to have boiled water ready to drink. Emma you can keep up on that while still staying away.”
Emma nodded.
“Another way you can help is making sure there is a steady supply of strong meals. Once we bring this fever down he will need to eat to keep up his strength.”
Emma rubbed her hands together nervously. “I can do all of that.”
“Good. Roger can help me, but that means he will have no contact with you until this is all over.” Frank looked between them.
Roger gave Emma a kiss on the forehead and then looked at Frank as though he was preparing for battle.
“All right, then. Roger we will need to get him in a lukewarm bath.”
The men talked as they headed back into the room and Emma went the opposite way to begin on her tasks.
Hours passed and the men took turns wiping down Alex’s body. His fever had lessoned, but was not gone. Typhoid could last weeks, and Frank knew they were just starting this battle.
“Roger, we need to get a schedule going. Sleep will be needed by both of us in order to get him through this.”
Roger agreed, already feeling tired, but not wanting to sleep.
“You take the day shifts and I’ll do nights. Teach me what to do.”
Frank thought that was the best plan considering. Frank found paper and pencil and wrote down the instructions as he taught Roger.
“I’m going to go home and inform Allie. I’m sure she is beside herself not knowing where I am. I’m coming back here to sleep, though. I know we both need to rest, but I will sleep better here than clear at my house. Then if something isn’t right, I’m here for you to wake.”
Roger stuck out his hand to shake Frank’s, but decided to pull him in for a hug instead. Frank was the one keeping his son alive at the moment. He already owed him everything. They parted and Frank rushed home as quickly as he could. When he walked through the door Allie rushed to greet him
“I’ve been worried sick. Supper was hours ago. It’s pitch black outside.”
Frank squeezed her tight.
“That’s the life of a doctor’s wife. I’m so sorry my dear. I was out on a call.”
Allie stepped out of the embrace.
“That was what I was hoping. My mind was racing in all different directions about what could have happened.”
Frank rubbed the back of his neck not sure how to tell her what he needed to.
“Are you hungry? I saved food.” Allie started heading to the kitchen, but Frank stopped her.
“No, Emma fed me.” He waited until the realization showed in her eyes.
“Emma? Why were you there?”
“Come, sit.” They both took the chairs in the living room before Frank continued. “Alex is sick. I’ve been there all afternoon and into the evening.” Frank blew out a breath. “Allie, it’s typhoid.”
Allie gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. A moment later she dropped her hand.
“How is he?”
Frank ran his hand down his face attempting and failing to wipe off the tired.
“He has a long way to go. I left him with Roger. Emma has been instructed not to go near him. I’m heading back over.”
Allie held an expression of confusion and worry.
“Roger and I decided to take turns with him. I’ll be sleeping over there until this is over.”
Allie nodded, and tears started to fall.
“Oh, Emma!” Silently she wanted to hit her head against the wall. She had been jealous of Emma and now her son’s life was in jeopardy. She was a horrible awful person. “Is there anything I can do?”
Frank thought on that for a moment.
“Yes, I think there might be. Emma is beside herself and pacing the floors since she isn’t allowed in. Maybe I can convince her to spend time with you daily. That will break up her days and hopefully keep her sane. Being with child, she needs to keep up her health.”
Frank knew they both needed a distraction from their worries. If he couldn’t help Allie, perhaps this would be some reprieve in its own way.
“Of course,” Allie bobbed her head. “You will need things, change of clothing, blankets…” Allie raced up the stairs and began packing for him.
Frank followed dragging his heels. He was tired, but liked seeing that Allie had some energy. She had been so tired lately. Maybe she had moved past that. Frank was leaving Allie again when she needed him, but this time he knew he needed to.
Something told him she would be fine, he could feel that. With Alex was where Frank was supposed to be for the time being. Frank took the bag from Allie and, after kissing her goodbye, headed as quickly as possible back to Alex.
CHAPTER 29
Allie paced the floor for days. Emma had come daily and Allie tried to find things to talk about that would distract her, but nothing worked. Emma was scared, and Allie was too. Keeping busy was the only way to keep her calm. They worked in the kitchen, tended the garden, and walked through town. During one of their walks, Emma asked Allie a question that pained her.
“Having Alex like this made me so scared. We need to plan for the possibility of more of us getting sick. What if Roger and I get sick and don’t make it? What would happen to our children if they are fine?”
“Emma, let’s not talk like that right now. Let’s focus on just today.” Allie’s eyebrows furrowed with concern.
Emma stopped walking and turned Allie towards her.
“No! You are not a mother, so you don’t understand the importance of having a plan. I don’t want anyone else to decide the future of my children.”
Allie cringed and she grew cold as she felt the blow Emma’s words caused.
Emma grasped Allie’s shoulders and looked into her eyes and continued.
“This place, this life is all my children know. We have no family close by. I don’t want them shipped across states when they are dealing with the worst thing that could ever happen to them. They barely know either of our fam
ilies. They know here. I want them to stay here.”
“But how? They can’t live on their own.” Allie was confused, perhaps still off guard from the reminder she was not a mother.
Emma moved her soft hand to Allie’s cheek.
“With you Allie. You and Frank. God forbid should anything happen to both of us. Oh please, say you would take them and raise them as your own.”
Allie sucked in air, her eyes moving between Emma’s trying to find the truth that lay within. “You are being silly. The likelihood that both of you would be gone is low.” Allie pulled away and took a few steps, eyes on her shoes.
“Allie, I’m not being silly. Yes, let’s hope that it never comes to that, but I need to know they have somewhere to go. Somewhere they already know so they won’t be as scared.”
“Oh Emma,” Allie turned back to her and embraced her. “Of course, we would do that.”
Her heart did a tiny flutter at the dream of having children, but she quickly beat it down as the cost of losing a friend was no price, no option. She wanted children, but she would never hope for the death of their parents to have that. Emma and Allie pulled back from each other, both wiping their own tears.
Later in the day Allie had returned to her ma’s journal. Emma’s words remained in the back of her mind as she read on. She was touched that Emma would think of her and trust her, but hoped that would never be needed. Allie kept reading while her mind was divided between the two. She almost missed the significance of the passage and started again fully focused in order to follow.
May thirteenth one thousand eight hundred eighty-three,
Mother has discovered my secret. Allen and I had been meeting regularly at Helen’s home and no one was the wiser until today when Mrs. Richardson decided to make a drop in visit to her daughter’s home. She walked in on us sitting in the morning room drinking tea.
After both Helen and I heard an ear full, she immediately went straight to my mother informing her. Allen followed Helen and I home. Mother was livid. I, of course, already knew she would be, which was why I wished to keep this secret.
In His Time Page 13