“Oh. I’m sorry for jumping to conclusions.” She offers Summer her hand. “It’s nice to meet you. Ryan and I used to date in college, and I lived in the house with him and your brother for a while. I see the resemblance now.”
I harrumph, and Myndi’s baby daddy looks like he wants to rip my head from my shoulders.
I’d like to see him try.
“Please don’t remind me,” Summer says. “Most of the time I try to forget we’re related.”
Myndi laughs, and it rubs me the wrong way. I can’t stomach being in her presence any longer. The ghosts of the past are choking the life out of me every second I’m around her. “I’m going outside. It’d be nice if you left by the time I return,” I spit out, as Gabby gasps.
“I’m so sorry. He’s—” I don’t hear the rest of Gabby’s apology as I storm outside.
“Hey, man. You okay?” My brother Caleb approaches me with caution, because they all know how crazy that woman makes me.
“I’ll be fine once I don’t have to look at her face.” Caleb shares a loaded look with my other brother Dean. “And no, before you ask me for the thousandth time, I don’t want to talk about it. Why the fuck is she here, anyway?”
“Gabby didn’t know they were coming,” Dean coolly states. “You know she’d never ambush you like that. I’m not even sure if Gabby knew Myndi was pregnant.”
“They’re best friends. Of course, she knew,” I bark, venting my frustration in the wrong direction.
“Don’t fucking take it out on Gabby, Ryan,” Caleb snaps back. “She lost her best friend in all this, and she’s never once blamed you for that.”
“Because it wasn’t my fucking fault!” I yell.
“Keep your voice down,” Dean cautions. “There are kids around.”
I attempt to rein in my anger, but I’m too wound up. Air whooshes out of my mouth as I drag my hands through my hair. “Fuck.” I chew on the inside of my mouth. “Seeing her again just brings so much shit to the surface, and it’s not something I enjoy thinking about.”
“I get it,” Dean says, nodding as he squeezes my shoulder.
Dean is the only one who knows everything that went down with Myndi. I wanted to confide in Slate, but I couldn’t ask him to keep it a secret from my sister, and if her best friend didn’t tell her the truth, then I wasn’t bringing them into it either.
“And I understand,” he continues. “Every time I have a confrontation with Annie, I’m in a foul mood for days after.”
Annie is Dean’s ex-wife, my nieces’ mother, and a Class-A bitch. It doesn’t matter that she’s apparently happily re-married; she still loves trying to wind my brother up any chance she gets.
The door opens behind me, and our parents join us. Great. Just what I need. “You okay, son?” Dad asks, looking me directly in the eye.
“I’m fine,” I lie, tension tightening my jaw and twisting in my gut.
“Maybe you should talk to her,” Mom softly suggests. “It might help if you unburdened whatev—”
“Seriously, Mom? You’re in no position to lecture me on this,” I snap. Shaking my head, I harrumph at the audacity of that woman to interfere, given her track record and when she hasn’t a clue about the situation with my ex.
“What exactly does that mean?” she asks with a frown, sharing a troubled glance with my Dad.
“Nothing.” I push past her. “Forget it. I’m going for a walk to cool off. I’ll catch you later.”
I veer left, away from the yard where the kids are playing ball.
Slate and Gabby purchased this house primarily for the lavish gardens. It stretches over two acres, and they have all the outdoor space they could ever need. I walk for five minutes until I come to the small covered seating area nestled between leafy trees and flowering shrubs. Plonking my butt down on the love seat, I cradle my head in my hands, wondering why I keep letting that woman get to me.
Why I enabled those cruel words she spoke to dig so deep into my heart, damaging it beyond repair.
Why I ever believed I was destined for love and marriage and the kind of family life my best friend shares with my sister.
“Hey.”
I pick my head up as Summer’s sweet voice rings out.
She shoves a bottle of beer at me. “Thought you could use this. Miley says she’s good to drive us back.”
My fingers curl around the cold glass, tingling where my skin comes into contact with her hand. “Thanks.” I whip the bottle away as if her touch is toxic.
It might as well be.
For the first time in over two years, I’ve met someone who threatens these steel walls I’ve built around my heart, and I don’t fucking like it one bit.
I don’t want to feel the things I’m feeling for this girl, and I’m terrified it goes beyond lust.
I made a promise to myself when things turned to shit with Myndi.
A promise I wouldn’t let myself fall again, and I won’t break it. Not even for someone as gorgeous and sweet as Summer.
“I’m not great company right now. You should head back.” I don’t even look at her as I attempt to dismiss her.
In true Summer fashion, she ignores me, dropping onto the seat beside me. “I like it out here, and we don’t have to talk. I’m good with silence.”
We sip our beers, rocking back and forth on the seat, in amicable silence, and the irony isn’t lost on me.
After a while, she sets her empty bottle down on the ground and clears her throat. “You know, I believe people come in and out of our lives at different times to teach us something. Maybe it’s something about ourselves. Maybe it’s something about the world. But I think every experience helps shape us. Helps prepare us for the future. Even the bad stuff. Even the stuff that seems like it might break us.”
I twist around to face her. “You want to know what I think?” She nods eagerly. “I think that’s the biggest crock of shit I’ve ever heard,” I spit out, still riled up. “That you’re way too young and naïve to know what you’re talking about. And I doubt you’ve faced any bad shit in your life.” I’m being a jackass, but I’m too pissed to tone it down.
She purses her lips, staring calmly at me while she contemplates how to reply. “You’re right. About it all, except the crock of shit. You might not share my beliefs, but that doesn’t give you the right to be rude about my opinions. Yes, I haven’t had to face many obstacles in my life. I know I’m luckier than most. But just because I have limited personal experience doesn’t mean I’m wrong.”
I pick at the label on my beer, mulling her words over, as she stands. Panic is instant. “I’m sorry. Don’t go,” I blurt before I’ve had time to rethink it. “I didn’t mean to disrespect you or your beliefs. It’s just hard for me to look objectively at it when my experiences have tainted my opinions.”
“I understand, and you’re forgiven,” she says, running her hands over the bark of a large, old, oak tree.
“Just like that, huh?” I inquire, climbing to my feet.
She spins around, her dress swirling around her thighs with the motion, reminding me of the ballerina on the top of the music box Gabby had as a kid. She used to watch that little ballerina rotate for hours at a time, forcing the rest of us to suffer that sickly sweet melody repeatedly. “I don’t bear grudges. Life’s too short.”
“I hope you never change, Summer,” I truthfully say, shoving my hands in the pockets of my jeans to ignore the urge to touch her. “There aren’t many like you in the world.”
She beams at me, dropping a curtesy that’s cute as hell. “Why, thank you, kind sir.” She turns back around to the tree, straining her neck to look up. “I have an idea.” There’s a devilish glint in her eye as she looks over her shoulder at me. “Let’s climb this tree.”
I stare at her blankly for a few seconds, sure I must’ve heard that wrong. But she’s already on the move, expertly placing her feet on the bark, and pulling her torso up as she climbs.
“Why?”
&n
bsp; “Because it’ll be fun.” She says this like my question was preposterous.
“You’ve done this before,” I remark, watching her scale the tree with skill. I place my hands on the bark, deciding I may as well join her in crazy town.
“Well, duh.” She looks down at me, laughing. “I grew up on a farm with an orchard and a small forest. Climbing is practically my middle name.” Her eyes shimmer with excitement and adventure, and I force my gaze away as she climbs higher, flashing her panties at me. I concentrate on climbing the tree and not looking up, but it takes mammoth self-control. I must be as crazy as she is to even contemplate this. It’s been years since I did anything on the spur of the moment, and the feeling of exhilaration is just what I need to distract my troubled mind.
She’s light on her feet, her body flexible, as she climbs higher and higher, while my heavier limbs struggle to keep pace with her. Eventually, I catch up, and I sit on the thick branch directly across from her. She has her hands planted on either side of her, her legs dangling over the edge, as she swings them back and forth with no fear.
“I tried to persuade my parents to let me live in the woods at the back of our property after I watched The Hunger Games,” she tells me without invitation. “I wanted to be like Katniss. Minus the killing part, obviously.” She grins at me. “I was convinced I could survive out there, blanketed in Mother Nature’s arms, and that I could fend for myself.”
“What happened?”
“My parents agreed to let me spend one night outside, and I barely lasted four hours.” She giggles. “Although that was Marc and Charlie’s fault because they snuck into the woods once it was dark and started throwing things and making noises, and I got so frightened I ran all the way back to the house leaving my tent and my bag behind.” She rolls her eyes. “It’s a wonder I still speak to any of my brothers given the stuff they pulled on me growing up.”
“It’s a rite of passage. Gabby can tell you about all the shit Slate, my brothers and I pulled on her over the years.”
She smiles. “I wouldn’t have it any other way, because then it’d mean they don’t care.”
Silence engulfs us, and I scan the land down below and in the distance. “It’s peaceful up here.”
“It is,” she agrees. “I love it, and you can see so much.”
I lean back against the trunk of the tree, swinging my legs up onto the branch. “Myndi accused me of cheating on her,” I admit, suddenly wanting to talk to Summer about it although I’m not brave enough to tell her everything.
“And did you?” she asks in a curious tone devoid of malice or accusation.
“No. I would never do that. Never.” Not after what I witnessed as a kid.
Cheating is a major deal breaker for me.
I rub a tense spot between my brows. “If I had ever felt like that, like I wanted to be with someone else, I would’ve ended things with her before betraying her trust. She knew how I felt about cheating, but she still wouldn’t accept that I was innocent.”
“Why did she believe you’d cheated on her?”
A pain slices across my chest as I revisit one of the most painful times in my life. “Because this bitch manipulated the situation one night when I was out at a club without Myndi. Catching me completely off guard, she pulled me into a kiss, and her friend recorded it in the seconds before I realized what was happening and pushed her off me. I was so fucking mad, especially when I discovered she posted it on social media within minutes, tagging my girlfriend, ensuring she’d see it and jump to the wrong conclusion.”
I pull my knees up to my chest, staring out at the darkening sky. “Myndi had already decided before I even got home to explain. She knew that bitch had been chasing after me for months. Knew I’d been continuously turning her down, but she didn’t want to hear my version of events, choosing to believe that photo instead.”
I gulp over the lump in my throat. “And it’s not like I didn’t understand her initial reaction because the photo was pretty damning, and Myndi’s ex had cheated on her, so she had understandable trust issues. But the difference between her and me is that if it’d happened in reverse, I would’ve given her the benefit of the doubt because I trusted her. I’d never given her any reason to doubt my loyalty, yet she immediately believed the worst. I thought she’d cool down the next day, but she didn’t. She refused to believe me, some other shit went down she blamed me for too, and that was it for me.”
“That sucks, and I’m sorry it happened to you.”
“Well, I’m not,” I honestly admit. “Because it proved that we never would’ve made it as a couple, and it was better to find that out before I’d invested any more of my time in a relationship that was going nowhere.”
“Is that why you don’t date anymore?”
“Who told you I don’t date?”
“I kinda guessed that first night we met, and Miley confirmed it.”
Fucking Miley and her big mouth. Not that it matters. It’s good that Summer knows this in case she’s harboring any silly notions of her and me.
“I didn’t date before Myndi, and I haven’t dated after her, and that’s what I prefer. I enjoy casual hookups when I need to fuck, and I make sure the girl knows it’s only a onetime thing. That it’s only sex. A pure physical release and nothing more.”
“And you haven’t grown tired of it? You don’t feel lonely?” Again, her questions are inquisitive, not critical in the slightest. It’s so easy to talk to her. To be honest with her. Because she genuinely doesn’t judge.
“Nope.” It’s not a lie if I’m deluding myself. “This way, there are no complications.” I swing my legs back around, looking her straight in the eye. “No feelings involved. And that’s exactly the way I like it.”
CHAPTER 11
Summer
I can tell he’s convinced himself he believes it, but deep down, he knows it’s not the truth, and that makes me sad for him, because he’s so closed off, so guarded, so unwilling to open his heart again that he might miss out on the greatest love of his life. Of course, I don’t voice those opinions, because he’d just chalk it up to my innocence and inexperience again, and I don’t want him thinking I’m hitting on him either, so I keep those thoughts to myself.
But I feel for him. I truly do. I’ve no plans to tie myself to a guy, but my heart is wide-open, and if love finds me, I won’t turn it away.
I’ll embrace it.
Jump off the cliff with gusto, allowing myself to free fall, trusting that I’ll land safely. Yes, I might be damaged or broken when I hit solid ground, but I know I’ll survive.
Ryan would never leave the platform, missing out on the entire experience, and I hurt for all those lost opportunities he’s most likely already foregone.
“We should get down,” he says, dragging me out of my head. “It’s getting dark and we need to head back to the city.”
“Okay.” I make a move, but he shakes his head.
“Let me go first.”
I don’t argue, letting him descend first and giving him a head start before I climb down. A gentle breeze blows around me as I descend, still lost in thought, and I’m a little distracted.
I’m about twenty feet off the ground when I lose my footing. It happens so fast, and it’s so unexpected, that I do the one thing you should never do—panic. My hands grapple at the tree trunk, my fingers desperately trying to hold on even as I feel myself falling.
“Fuck! Summer!” Ryan shouts from somewhere below me.
I close my eyes, humming under my breath as I go into that Zen place in my head, preparing for the inevitable hard landing. It’s not as if this is the first time I’ve fallen out of a tree. I’ve a history of broken bones to prove it, so I’m expecting the worst.
But it doesn’t happen. Instead, I land in a pair of strong, warm arms, and relief washes over me. With my eyes still shut, I wrap my arms around Ryan’s neck, resting my head on his broad chest, inhaling his potently masculine scent.
Might as
well take advantage of the opportunity while I can.
Being held by him again is nice. His heart is beating frantically under my ear, mirroring the pounding organ in my chest.
“You scared the shit out of me,” he exclaims, his voice gruff. “You’re lucky I’d reached the ground, or you could’ve been seriously injured.”
My eyes flicker open, and I lift my head, peering into his piercing blue eyes. “Thank you for saving me.”
He makes no move to put my feet on the ground, and I raise no objection. My heart is thumping wildly, doing cartwheels and somersaults behind my rib cage as we stare at one another. Something indecipherable passes in the tiny space between us, and despite my previous protestations, I know I want him. I’m only fooling myself by pretending otherwise.
I want him so badly I could cry.
I need to feel his lips on mine again.
To savor the feel of his tongue as it sweeps inside my mouth.
To burn from the fiery tingles scorching a path across my skin in all the places where he touches me.
His chest rises, his pupils darken, and I imagine his mind has gone to the same blissful place mine has. My tongue darts out to moisten my dry lips, and his eyes follow the motion. “You shouldn’t thank me,” he half-whispers, his eyes still glued to my mouth.
“Why not?” I whisper back, circling my arms more firmly around his neck as he holds me closer to this chest.
“Because I’m about to do something I shouldn’t.” He lowers his head, lining our mouths up, and his warm breath fans over my face. “Now is the time to say no if you don’t want this,” he whispers across my lips.
Determination flows through me, and I bridge the tiny gap between us, pressing my lips to his.
Our mouths glide effortlessly together. Once, twice, three times. Just a barely there kiss each time. A fleeting meeting of lips.
No Feelings Involved: A Brother's Best Friend Standalone Romance Page 9