It startled her—she hadn’t expected to be next. And she hadn’t given her prayer any thought. Your sister has acute leukemia. Kendall shrugged. “I don’t know what I want to pray for. I guess, my business.”
“Just your business?” Sheridan asked with a frown in her voice.
“Yeah,” she responded, and wondered what Sheridan knew. She wouldn’t have been surprised if Pastor Ford had alerted Sheridan; but if she had, that wasn’t cool. She didn’t want any of these women in her business—she didn’t want any connections.
“Okay,” Sheridan finally said. “What specifically about your business?”
“I’ve been in partnership with my husband…my ex-husband, and we’re trying to work out the terms of my buying his interest,” she said. “I guess I’d like to stand for that happening…soon.”
“Hold up.” Asia raised her hand in the air. “All this time, you’ve been running your business with your ex-husband while he’s been poking your sister? Man, if that were my sister, she’d have to pay.”
Your sister has acute leukemia.
Kendall said, “Stay out of my business, Asia.”
“Why? You’ve been all up in mine.”
“I keep telling you, little girl, you don’t want to mess with me.”
“And that’s another thing,” Asia said. “I ain’t no little girl.”
“Will you two just stop it?” Vanessa yelled, shocking them all. “I cannot believe how you’re acting.” Her hands waved through the air. “You’re in church and this is supposed to be a prayer group, but with you two I feel like I’m watching Saturday night boxing, live from Las Vegas.”
After a moment, “Thank you, Vanessa,” Sheridan said.
“Well maybe we should all get a clue.” Asia pouted. “None of us wants to be here.”
“That’s not true. I want to be here,” Sheridan said.
“Me too,” Vanessa piped in.
“That’s because neither of you has a life,” Asia said.
“You know what, Asia.” Sheridan threw up her hands. “I got the clue. You don’t want to be here. So leave.” She paused, looked at Kendall. “Anyone who doesn’t want to be here should leave!”
“Fine with me.” Asia jumped up, looked around, her glance stopping with Kendall. She paused, and then as if she had a thought of her aunt, she slowly returned to her seat. “If we could just move this along faster, I could handle these meetings.”
Sheridan inhaled, waited for the oxygen to give her energy. “Since you’re staying, what would you like to put on our prayer list?”
“Nothing.”
“Girl,” Kendall yelled, “would you tell her something so that we can get out of here?”
“All right. You can pray for…my daughter.”
“Is there something wrong with her?” Vanessa’s tone was wrapped with care, her annoyance with Asia forgotten.
“No, there’s nothing wrong.” Then Asia paused, looked at the three pairs of eyes that stared at her, now with more concern than contempt. “Actually, I’m a little worried.” Her face became long with misery. “I have a feeling that something is going on with her—in school or somewhere.”
“Something like what?” Sheridan asked the question, but Kendall and Vanessa’s eyes stayed glued on Asia too.
She shrugged. “Maybe I’m imagining it. Just pray for her safety.”
“Okay,” Sheridan began, peering at Asia deeply. “We’ll definitely pray for her—Angel, right?”
With a grateful smile, Asia nodded.
Sheridan said, “Actually, I have the same kind of request. I would appreciate your prayers for my children.”
“You have a daughter, right?” Vanessa said.
Sheridan nodded. “My daughter’s thirteen and I have a son, Christopher, who’s in his second year at Hampton University, although this semester, he’s in China as part of an exchange program.”
“Wow,” Vanessa said. “You’ve got to be proud.”
“I am. So, I want to pray for God’s covering and protection over them.”
They all nodded.
Sheridan glanced at her watch. “Well, I know a few of you really want to get out of here.” Kendall and Asia bolted from their seats. Sheridan and Vanessa slowly stood as well.
When they bowed their heads and Sheridan began the prayer, Kendall wondered how much longer this prayer group would go on. Sheridan was a saint—definitely for putting up with Asia, but she hadn’t made it easy either.
“Lord, protect our families,” Sheridan said. “We are in such a battle, a war with the enemy.”
That made Kendall shudder. She needed to pray for her family, for her father and his strength.
“Protect our minds, Lord, so the devil cannot get in.” Sheridan paused, as Vanessa coughed. “We will always give you the honor and the glory, in Jesus’s name.”
And together they said “Amen.”
Chapter Thirty-four
SHERIDAN
Pastor Ford’s embrace was warm. “Come on in,” she said, inviting Sheridan into her living room.
“Pastor, are you sure this is okay? I know you were trying to take a few days off this week.”
Pastor Ford waved her hands, erasing Sheridan’s words. “I invited you because I wanted us to have lunch. I grilled all of this chicken and somebody’s going to eat it.” She laughed. “And I want to catch up with you on the prayer group.”
Sheridan sighed. “The group hasn’t been going well and I think it’s my fault.”
Pastor Ford frowned.
“Shambles doesn’t even begin to describe what my life is like. I don’t know how I thought I could help anyone.”
“Why would you say your life is messed up?”
Sheridan shook her head. Tori kissing, or Brock being missing—she didn’t know where to start. “Things began to fall apart right after my dad passed away. It’s as if I lost my covering with his death.”
“You know that’s not true. So, what’s going on?”
“Well, there’s Tori.” For minutes, Sheridan took her pastor on the journey from the kiss to Irma’s words to Tori’s battle in school. “I want to believe that what Tori said is true, that it was just a kiss. But Pastor, this really has me shaken. I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t stop seeing Lara and Tori….” She stopped, shuddered. “Pastor, suppose Tori is…because Quentin…”
Pastor Ford held up her hand. “First of all, you know Quentin wasn’t born that way, so neither was Tori.”
“That’s what I’ve been telling myself, but where did this come from? There has to be some reason why Tori wanted to kiss Lara.”
“There’re a couple of reasons. I believe Tori’s telling the truth. She probably was just curious about kissing—not curious about kissing a girl. But what made her believe that kissing a girl would be fine is the problem. The movies, the TV shows, the videos that are promoting same-sex values are designed to desensitize our children. Make them believe that homosexuality is no big deal. They’re trying to get our children to believe that their lies are the truth.”
“That’s exactly the way Tori was acting, Pastor. As if it were no big deal. But if she’s curious about kissing, what’s next? What’s the next thing she’ll want to try—with a boy or a girl?”
“Tori’s a teenager. This time was bound to come. But it sounds like you handled Tori fine. Just keep that communication open. You’re going to have to keep talking to her and letting her know that it’s okay for her to talk to you. That’s the only way you’ll stay in control.”
Sheridan nodded.
Pastor Ford continued, “And be prepared for Tori’s questions. She may ask you some things that you don’t want to answer.”
Sheridan moaned. “I thought life was tough with Christopher.”
Pastor Ford chuckled. “But you made it through and look at him now.”
“I made it with a lot of prayer.”
“That part never changes. So no more talk of not leading the prayer gr
oup.”
Sheridan shook her head. “It’s not just Tori.” She paused. “There are so many other things. This is just not a good time.”
“You still don’t get it.”
Sheridan frowned.
“God uses you when He wants to use you, not when it’s a good time for you. This is all about Him—His time, His purpose. And usually He picks the times when we think we are most inept.” She paused. “So, you just need to quit complaining, and turn your thoughts to these other women. Pray for Kendall, Vanessa, and Asia and what’s going on in their lives. When you do that, watch how everything will fall into place in yours.”
It felt like a scolding, but somehow it felt right. If she turned her focus outward, maybe she could rid herself of the twisting in her stomach that had become her new companion.
She forced a smile. “Okay.”
“Great!” Pastor Ford said. “Now, you’re going to need some energy to do all of that praying, so let’s get to eatin’.” Pastor Ford laughed, but Sheridan didn’t. She couldn’t, not through the rumbling that had just erupted in her stomach.
Chapter Thirty-five
SHERIDAN
Sheridan rolled the shopping cart down the aisle, the basket only half filled. But, she didn’t feel like wandering any longer through the thirty aisles of the grocery superstore. Not with her stomach being so unsettled.
“It’s just the chicken,” she told herself. But she didn’t believe her words. She hadn’t eaten much with her pastor, but still she felt sick.
Pushing her cart forward, she closed her eyes for just a moment, but when she looked up, it was too late. Her shopping cart slammed into the back of the man standing in the checkout line.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” the man said, turning around.
“Quentin!”
He grinned. “First you dump your coffee all over me, and now you’re trying to run me down with this weapon of mass destruction. If I didn’t know better, I’d think you were following me around the city, just waiting to attack.”
“Believe me, if I wanted to hurt you, it would be with something more lethal than a shopping cart, Dr. Hart.”
“Ouch.” He laughed and put the carton of milk he’d been holding onto the conveyer belt. “How’ve you been?” He kissed her on the cheek.
“Fine.”
He frowned. “Doesn’t sound that way.”
She shrugged, thought of Tori. Then thought of Brock and turned her eyes away from him. “So, you’re doing your own shopping these days?” she asked.
“I’ve been doing my own shopping since…” He stopped. “I haven’t spoken to Tori in a couple of days and that’s not like her. Is everything all right?”
Sheridan peered at Quentin. Wanted to ask him right there if he were trying to turn their daughter gay. Knew right then that was a ridiculous thought. “She’s fine. I’ll make sure that she calls you tonight.”
Sheridan watched her ex as he took cash from his wallet to pay the cashier. He still moved with grace, his perfectly manicured fingers cutting through the air as if he were conducting a symphony. He still stood with dignity, his head high as if he were above the world.
“I’ll wait and help you take that stuff to the car,” he said, interrupting her thoughts.
She didn’t know why her face burned with heat under his glance. He put his grocery bag on top of hers and rolled the cart into the parking lot. After he packed the packages inside her SUV, he asked, “You want to grab a cup of coffee?”
She tilted her head. “You have time for a lot of coffee these days. Who’s taking care of your patients?”
He chuckled. “My patients are fine. It’s just that I think bumping into you is a sign. We haven’t spent much time together recently.”
“We haven’t spent time together in three years. And why would we?” She leaned against the car. “We’re divorced.”
“Doesn’t mean we can’t be friends.”
“No need. I have plenty of friends.”
He leaned next to her, stepping into her personal space. “I’ve missed you as my friend, Sheridan. There was a time when we could talk about anything.”
“There was a time when I could trust you with anything.”
“And you can’t anymore?”
She shook her head. “Lost all of that when you told me you preferred Jett over me.”
“Never said that.”
“That was the result.”
He peered at her for a long moment. Made her skin burn more. Made her heart pound harder. “Even after all these years, and the fact that Jett is gone, you still can’t forgive me?”
“I’m not sure what I’m supposed to forgive you for, Quentin. Forgive you for being gay?”
“I’m not actually gay. I’m…well, I’m whatever. And, I can’t help that.”
She ignored his comment. “Or maybe I’m supposed to forgive you for leaving me.”
“I never wanted to do that.”
She hesitated. “Did you really think I would go along with you being with me and Jett at the same time?”
He tilted his head toward the sky. Waited for a bit of time to pass. “I’m not sure what I wanted then.” He shrugged. “I guess that’s why I’ve had such a hard time since.” Now his eyes were on her. “There is one thing I’ve been absolutely sure about, though.” He moved close, so close she could feel his breath as he spoke. “I’ve always known that I still love you.”
She stayed in that place—just for a moment—before she backed away from him.
He said, “I’m not asking you for anything. Just want you to know the truth. I love you. Always have. Always will.”
Life in the grocery store parking lot continued—cars passed and honked. People strolled and talked. All was normal, except for this declaration from her ex-husband. “How can…” She stopped. “Never mind. We don’t even need to go there, it doesn’t matter.”
“Are you sure about that?” he asked softly.
“Yes.”
But he looked at her as if he knew her heart was blasting through her chest. “Then, if you’re so sure, come home with me.”
“What?”
Her shock made him laugh. “You’ve never been by my place except to drop Tori off. And, we could have a cup of coffee…and talk. Talk about where we went wrong.”
“We?”
“Okay, maybe not we.” He softened his voice. “But we can talk about finding a way to be friends.” Her glance followed his hand as he entwined his fingers with hers. Their hands melded together—as if they were meant to be. Then his thumb stroked her palm the way he used to, and she remembered everything that it had taken her three years to forget.
“So, do you want to come by my place for…a cup of coffee? And to talk. I need to talk about…” He stopped, not finishing the thought.
Now she knew why her heart pounded. This was what she’d prayed for. Was he ready to renounce his lifestyle, come back to the side of right?
He squeezed her hand. “I need you, Sheridan,” he whispered. “I need to talk to you.”
She almost nodded, almost agreed. But when her stomach rumbled, reason returned. And she pulled her hand and heart away from him.
“Sheridan…” His beeper vibrated, and he glanced at his pager. With a sigh he said, “I’ve gotta get this.” His eyes held more than regret when he leaned forward and brushed his lips against her cheek. “Let’s finish this later.”
He strolled away before she could tell him that there was no need for later. It was already finished.
Inside her car, she turned on the ignition, tried to turn off thoughts of Quentin—his words, his touch. But it was only when she thought of Brock that she smiled.
Chapter Thirty-six
SHERIDAN
The telephone had rung just once and when he picked up, Sheridan spoke before he could even greet her.
“Brock, I love you and I miss you and I want to see you.”
<
br /> “Me too.”
She’d inhaled hope. “I don’t want to fight anymore.”
“I never wanted to fight at all.”
“I want to see you; can you come over?”
And then, the sound of dead air, the quiet nothing that came through once someone disconnected. She stared at the phone, her face tight with confusion.
In the next moment, the telephone rang. “I meant to say yes.” Brock’s smile came through. “Give me about an hour. I love you.”
He’d hung up again, and although she’d wanted to linger in the memory of his words, she’d rushed to her bedroom to shower.
Now Sheridan peeked through the curtains just as Brock’s car stopped at the curb. She scooted from the window and turned to the mirror. It had been a long time since she’d given this much thought to the way she looked. She never had to—no matter what she wore, Brock thought she was beautiful. But today she’d chosen with care. The new jeans she’d purchased months ago hugged her curves and the equally flattering white silk T-shirt completed the ensemble—all designed to remind Brock of the reasons he’d had to miss her.
The bell chimed and with a deep breath, she swung the door open. “Roses,” she exclaimed.
“No, my name is Brock,” he kidded. He kissed her and then handed her the flowers.
She inhaled—the perfume of hope. She smiled, knowing now, they would be all right.
Inside the kitchen, she arranged the stems into a crystal vase and the moment she finished, he wrapped his arms around her and held her as if they hadn’t spent twelve days apart. “I’ve missed you,” he whispered.
She closed her eyes, took in his scent and his words. When she stepped away from his embrace, she said, “I’ve missed you, too. I was surprised when I didn’t see you in church.”
“I’ve been going to my grandmother’s church.” He paused. “Maybe I’ll come back to Hope Chapel Sunday.”
Holding hands, they wandered into the family room, and when they sat, he held her in the quiet. “This is what I’ve missed most,” he said.
She nestled deeper into his chest. “I don’t know how to get you to believe how much I love you.”
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