by Cybill Cain
“Fair enough. We’ll put a pin in it for now.” He didn’t press for a comment about his feeling drawn to me. I appreciated that about him, the confidence he had to just speak his mind without requiring validation or reciprocity. He knew I’d heard him, and allowed me to respond when I was ready. That was a rare quality, and I admired it very much.
“Was there anything else you needed from the store?”
“Yes, I made a list while you were in the shower.” He pulled it from his pocket and handed it to me. I glanced over it quickly. “I saw a grill on the back deck. I’d like make you dinner tonight.”
“Thank you, but that’s not necessary. You’re on vacation here.”
“And I like to cook, and I never get the chance. It would please me very much.” Was I really going to argue with him? No, when your movie star crush wants to grill lobster for you, you just say yes, and thank you.
“Yes, all right, and thank you.” I put the list in the back pocket of my shorts. “It’ll just take me a few minutes to finish up in here first.”
4- The View from Here
Max
When Annie got back from the store I was just finishing up making us a snack. We’d had a late breakfast, but I wanted something to hold me over until dinner. I was craving a grilled peanut butter and honey sandwich, something I’d first had in Australia a few years ago. I’d seen the honey on the counter this morning, but on my hunt for peanut butter I’d found something else.
When I opened the pantry, another DVD had tumbled out, hitting me on the head before clattering to the floor. Escape Velocity, another of my action films, I found when I turned it over. When I reached for the bread, I’d grabbed Knight Tech, a techno noir thriller, but the pièce de résistance was finding Heartthrob, my one romantic comedy effort, tucked under the sink between two frying pans.
I stacked them on the table, and waited for her to return so that I could get to the bottom of whatever the hell was going on with her and my movies. Were they so bad she had to put them out of sight?
I set the table, and helped her put the groceries away, giving her time to catch her breath and take a few bites of her sandwich before I couldn’t stand it anymore. I’d covered the DVD’s with a dishtowel, and pulled it off as I asked her one of the many burning questions on my mind.
“Annie, why is it every time I open a cabinet or a door one of my movies comes tumbling out?” She choked on her sandwich, coughing so hard she scared me a little. She reached for her water, taking a sip before she started coughing again. Once I was sure she wasn’t dying on me, I waited patiently for her to answer me.
“It’s not what you think,” she sputtered, still having trouble getting her throat clear.
“Oh? And what do I think exactly?” I was enjoying this, probably more than I should be, since she still sounded like she was having trouble breathing, but I was a little hurt that she had been pretending to not know who I was. Finally, she got herself settled, and turned to me.
“I imagine you must think I’m a little nuts.”
“The thought did cross my mind. You’ve been acting like you had no idea who I am, but that clearly isn’t true.”
“No, it is true.” I was confused, but then she went on. “Meenan didn’t tell me who was coming. All he said was someone famous who was close to his boss. Famous people stay here often, so I didn’t think much about it. Frankly, I was more worried about your connection to his boss than who you might be.
“When you got here, of course I recognized you, but you were on vacation, and all I could have said were things you’ve heard a thousand times. ‘Oh! I’m such a fan! I loved you in Knight Tech! You’re my secret movie boyfriend!’ How comfortable would you have been to find yourself staying in the home of a fangirl? And how lame would I have been to give in to my knee jerk reaction to fawn all over you?
“When I saw you standing in my foyer I decided that it would be better for both of us if I acted like you were just a regular guy, instead of my movie idol, because I didn’t really know you, and pretending that I did because of some role you’d played wasn’t fair to either of us. I was also pretty sure that if I came on like a stalking nut case that I would miss the chance to truly know you, so I hid your movies, and played it cool.” She paused there to take a quick breath. “I didn’t plan on you being so kitchen-y. Most famous people expect me to wait on them hand and foot, insisting that I bring meals to their rooms sometimes, because they don’t want to step foot near the kitchen to get their special vitamin fizzy water, or whatever.” She’d been shrinking in her chair the whole time she was babbling, like a balloon someone was letting the air out of. My head was reeling both from the speed of her discourse, and it’s content.
Secret movie boyfriend? Fangirl? Movie idol?
“It’s your fault,” I told her, taking the last bite of my sandwich. She snuck a peek at me through her lashes.
“Whaddya mean?”
“I’m so kitchen-y because you’ve made me feel comfortable and at home here since I arrived.” Her head snapped up, her eyes wide like she doubted what she’d heard. Her considerateness gave me a warm feeling. Too many people would have done exactly what she had consciously chosen not to do, and she was right, mostly. The tenor of our meeting would have changed if she had fangirled me, but not like she was thinking.
If the painted goddess I had seen in the attic had come downstairs and told me that I was her secret movie boyfriend, I would have taken her with me into my room and fucked her until sunrise, the way any good boyfriend would do. I’d probably still be busy making her come for me.
I shifted in my chair, my dick was hard again, like it always seemed to be around her. Part of me was glad she’d played it cool. I wanted this to build a little more. I wanted to get to know her. I was almost sorry I’d put her on the spot about the movies. Almost, but not quite, because I was sure she never would have told me if I hadn’t called her out on it.
“I’m…glad you feel at home here.” She reached for her sandwich, and took another cautious bite, chewing slowly and sipping her water, before letting out what sounded like a sigh of relief. “I’m glad you found them. I’m glad you know. I hope that you don’t think too harshly of me for lying.”
“I don’t. My life is very strange sometimes. You’re more right than you know. Very few people who didn’t know me before I did movies can separate the man from the image. I’m glad to know you can.”
“It’s the gift of the artist, to see the man behind the curtain.” What a strange way to put it.
“I think that would be a gift, but not everyone would. Sometimes, a little illusion is what we need to get through the day.”
“Sometimes, it’s a little delusion that trips us up, and makes us fall.”
“And you never fall, Annie?” She snorted.
“Harder than most. I’ve got the scars to prove it.” She sat back, crossing her arms. “I think that’s the price, you know? You see so much, and get so confident in not getting fooled that when you do, you land hard enough to make up for all the times you played it smart, or thought you did.”
“Thought you did?” She shrugged.
“I don’t know how to explain it well, but I think that seeing behind the curtain can lead to making choices that are smart, but also to missing out on things that you would have gained if you’d not known to step away. Like,” she turned to face me, uncrossing her arms, and resting her head on her hand as she warmed up to the topic. “I might cross the street if I saw someone coming I didn’t want to talk to, dodging them and the situation entirely, but what I didn’t see is that if I had stayed on that side of the street, and accepted the conversation I didn’t want to have, a half a block away I would have met the man of my dreams, but I missed him because I didn’t want to have that initial conversation. We miss each other because now I’m on the opposite side, hurrying by with my head down, and he doesn’t look over.
“And of course there’s the part where once I go in, I go all i
n, and hold on way longer than I should because I was so sure that I saw something there worth holding on to, and that if I wait just a little longer it will show up.
“One of the hardest things I’ve had to learn is that potential doesn’t often equal reality when it comes to dealing with people.” I let out a breath.
“Boy, do I understand that. So many times I’ve seen things in people, things that they can do, but refuse to do, that would make them happier. My wanting them to be happy doesn’t rate on their own internal measuring scale. The hardest thing I’ve had to accept is that people have to want to be happy themselves, and there is nothing I can do to truly change or influence their decisions or opinions.” She smiled at me, nodding like she really understood what I was saying.
“People gots baggage.” I laughed.
“Yes, they do. We all do. God knows, I do.” She reached over to squeeze my hand. This time, it was my heart that throbbed instead of my cock.
“Ready for your lighthouse tour, baggage man?” I couldn’t resist teasing her.
“Only if you promise to fawn on me a little.” She giggled, and blushed. I loved it.
“That costs extra.”
“I’m a big tipper.”
“I bet you are,” she drawled, smiling as she stood, and put her plate in the sink.
***
Annie
We walked the beach side by side on our way to the lighthouse. It was a quiet walk, both of us lost in our own thoughts. I was relieved that my secret was out on the table now, and I didn’t have to worry about saying or doing something that would tip my hand about knowing who he was. I was free to just be me now, and that felt good. It made room for me to think about his request.
I stopped, and turned my face up to the sun for a moment, letting its light warm me while the sound of the waves soothed my mind. It never failed to remind me that I was small and insignificant in the face of time, and that the things that held me up and out would fade to nothing in the face of such eternal things.
It also created a sense of completeness that I be here to feel the light and hear the waves, because my very presence was required to close the circle. These majesties mattered more because someone appreciated them.
When I opened my eyes I found Max staring at me. There was curiosity and appreciation in his gaze, but it was for me instead of the wonder around us. It made me tingle. I held my hand out to him, and he took it, coming to stand beside me.
“Close your eyes, Max, and give your face to the sun. Hear the ocean pounding against the sand, churning as if it were a living thing unto itself, locked in an endless battle to escape its confines and sweep over the land. If you give yourself over to it, you can feel the earth move beneath your feet.” I watched as he did it, and tried not to get lost in the feel of my hand in his.
He had said he was drawn to me, now that I was able to relax around him completely I could admit that I was drawn to him as well. Several minutes passed with his face looking up before he staggered next to me, his hand tightening around mine. His eyes opened, his expression a little panicked from his experience. He chuckled and stepped closer to me, making me crane my neck to look up into his eyes. The wonder I saw there sent a shiver through me.
“Did you feel that?” he asked, he smiled down at me, sounding a little awed. I shook my head.
“Not this time, I was too focused on you, but I have felt it before. For just a second, when you locked into your surroundings, it felt like you were falling, didn’t it?” He nodded, his smile evening out to linger on his handsome face.
“It felt like the ground disappeared beneath my feet.” I smiled back at him.
“Pretty cool, right?”
“It really is.” We resumed our walk, still holding each other’s hands, our fingers intertwined. When we got to the lighthouse he stopped and looked up. Anticipating his question, I answered before he asked.
“It is one hundred and ninety three feet tall, originally commissioned in the late seventeen hundreds, it’s been rebuilt twice, and relocated once during its history. We’re lucky to have it here. It serves as a beacon to tourists as much as it does to ships.” We walked around the entire base, him to see it up close, and me to look for trash that needed to be collected.
When we got back to the door, I slipped off my backpack, and took out the key. He bent down to admire the potted flowers I kept by the door, brushing his fingers gently across the early spring blooms. He could touch me like that, too, my inner voice whispered. I swallowed, and shushed it. “Ready to go in?”
“Yes, please. I can’t wait to see it.” I unlocked the door, and let him go in first. He stopped inside, and immediately dug out his cellphone to take a picture of the winding staircase that led to the top. The way the light was coming down made it seem mysterious and beautiful, like the beginning of an Escher drawing. I had my camera, too, and put my pack down to get it out. I’d shot this scene countless times, but the light always made it unique. I got off a few snaps, before following him around the staircase to the room off the backside.
“What’s in here?” he leaned in, seeing the cot and rudimentary supplies I kept here in case of emergencies.
“Caretaker’s room. If a bad enough storm comes, I stay here until it passes, making sure that everything is working properly. I’ve only had to do it once since I took over, but I learned then how important it was to keep this place stocked.” Max looked at everything closely, not dismissing a single detail of what he was seeing. I wondered if it was that attention to detail that made him such a good actor. “Ready to go up?”
“Yeah,” he backed up and smiled down at me so sweetly that my heart did a little flip. “Lead the way.” I was already climbing when it occurred to me that he was probably watching my ass again. I liked the idea that he was looking, but refused to check. Imagining it made my breathing erratic. I was out of breath when we got the top, but it wasn’t from the climb.
“You all right?” he asked, looking amused. My gaze raked over him from head to toe, seeing the erection I’d felt at the sink last night was back full force. I felt the smirk on my face.
“As good as you are,” I told him, cutting my eyes to the side as I teased him. He laughed, and took my hand again, bringing it up to his lips for a soft kiss that wiped the smirk right off my face. I stopped panting. I stopped breathing as I stared into his eyes, wishing I knew what he was thinking.
His lips were soft and warm, and I wanted them to keep kissing me. There were spots on my skin screaming for their touch. If he followed them, he would eventually wind up with his lips pressed to mine, and that seemed like the best idea ever. I gasped, remembering I needed air, and tried to calm my racing pulse.
“Tell me about the view from here.” I thought he was giving me a graceful out, until he used his hold on my hand to pull me in front of him, standing right behind me. He leaned around me, and placed his hands on the railing, but he was careful not to press his hips to mine, and I wondered if that was a courtesy to me or to himself. When his hot breath fell across my neck, his mouth right beside my ear, I decided it must have been for him, because he was bent on driving me crazy. “What’s that over there?”
“The town of Upton,” I squeaked, clearing my throat before going on. “You came through there to get here. It’s where I shop, and where most of the people I was talking about this morning live.”
“And that, over there?”
“The local marina.”
“Do they have rentals for the day? Fishing trips, glass bottom boat rides, scuba, things like that?”
“Y-Yes.” I grabbed the railing for something solid to hold onto. The effect he was having on me was unprecedented. It felt like I was on fire, and every breath from him ignited me further. My nipples were hard and I could feel the dampness between my legs, and he hadn’t even touched me. I rolled my eyes, feeling sorry about teasing him a moment ago. Was this payback?
“Are you all right?” he asked me again. I could hear the smile i
n his voice, like a dare. An evil grin spread over my face just before I arched my back and pressed my ass into his erection. I felt another wave of hot air brush my skin when he suddenly exhaled, and growled softly in my ear. I’d meant to show him how it felt to be teased, but it was a bad plan if I’d wanted revenge, because the feel of his hardness pressed against me was devastating, and my body wanted more. I rocked back into him again, feeding the ache in the sweetest ways.
“Annie,” he groaned in my ear, but he didn’t step away, nor did he ask me to stop. Instead, he took his hands off the railing, and placed them on my hips, taking control of what I had started, rocking into me when I pushed back to feel him. I’d pulled my hair up into a pony tail before we left the house, and that gave him access to my neck.
His lips were hotter than they had been when he kissed my hand, almost scalding me. My arm floated up to wrap around his neck, holding him to me. He grunted his approval, lightly nipping my ear.
Distantly, I felt him take the camera that I had around my neck, before his hand came back to my hips again. His hold on me was firm but gentle. He was in control, but I sensed that all I had to do was say stop, and he would. I didn’t want to stop. I pressed back harder against him, rubbing my hips from side to side to really feel him.
He was a big man, all over. The feel of him made me press harder, wanting more. “Slow down, Annie. Let me give you what you need.” Yes, I thought, not able to find the breath to speak it.
His hand slid up my body, under my shirt, pushing up my bra to let my breast rest in his big palm. He felt the weight of it, making soothing sounds to calm the torrent his touch was setting lose inside me. His other hand came up to do the same, freeing my hips, but leaving me to rest against his hard cock. When he tugged my nipples, twisting them between his fingers before stretching them out and releasing them, I made a sound somewhere between pleading and swearing. He chuckled in my ear. “It’s good to know I make you hard, too, Annie.” He kissed my neck again, “Do I make you wet, too?”