by Monica Cole
“The way ya’ll spend every second together, one could misinterpret.”
“Misinterpret what?”
Canyon saunters into the kitchen, sliding his phone into his pocket as he takes a seat beside me.
“Elaine thinks we’re lovers,” Parker replies, making me choke on my coffee.
Canyon smiles as I reach for a napkin and wipe my mouth.
“Someone sounds jealous.”
“I’m not jealous,” I mutter, tossing my wet napkin at him. “I just don’t know what you see in each other. You’re both irritating as hell.”
“That’s just one of the things I love about him,” Canyon replies in a sickeningly sweet voice. He and Parker exchange adoring glances and I start dry heaving.
“Get a room,” I grab my mug and take it to the sink, turning around just in time to see them fist bump each other. I walk back over to the table and lean against my empty chair.
“Canyon and I are about to head to the studio. You want to come?” Parker looks at me expectantly. Hopefully. Honestly, it’s the last thing I want to do right now, but I promised Canyon I’d try, and I owe it to Parker. I am curious to see Canyon’s studio, so I guess it wouldn’t hurt to tag along.
“Sure.” I shrug casually and when Parker smiles, I regret my decision a little less.
Canyon’s studio is impressive.
It’s located in an old building downtown but with the renovations he’s done, it looks brand new. Modern. Sleek. It kind of reminds me of his house with all the black and white, but there are splashes of color here and there making it feel a little less sterile. The walls are decorated with canvases of his work and a white couch with two matching chairs surround a glass coffee table that matches the glass counter towards the back of the room. I wander over to one of his portraits but stop short when I notice…
“So what do you think?”
My stomach churns as I tear my eyes off the portrait. Canyon is leaning back on the counter with his elbows propped up, his face expressionless.
“It’s amazing,” I answer, unable to keep my eyes from drifting back to the picture. I can’t believe he kept these. Let alone displayed one in his studio. My heart in my throat, I study the close up portrait of me, lying on my bed, gray eyes wide as I stare directly at the camera. My hands are splayed beside my head, bottom lip caught between my teeth. I look relaxed yet…terrified. And I know exactly why because I can recall the moment perfectly. Canyon kneeling above me. His body between my legs. The way he kept leaning over to brush the hair from my face. The memory is as clear and sharp as glass, reflecting everything we used to be. And now… I look back at him but this time, he’s the one staring at the picture. Like he can sense me looking, his eyes drift back to me, his gaze lingering on my mouth a beat too long.
“So…” I start, walking over to the couch. It looks expensive and stiff. I’m surprised at how comfortable it is. “What happened to you becoming the next Dr. Beckett?”
I cross my legs and Canyon’s eyes follow the movement, causing my skin to break out in goose bumps even though I feel like fire is pumping through my veins. He walks across the room and joins me on the couch but unlike earlier when he sat on my bed, he keeps his distance.
“A lot of things changed after you left,” he starts, leaning forward so his forearms are resting on his legs, “Dad was still pressing med school, but I was tired of living in his shadow. Tired of following his agenda.” He pauses, rolling his lips together. “One day I just lost it. Told him I wasn’t going to med school, which meant college was out of the picture for me since he refused to pay for anything else. He was pissed to say the least. I don’t think he talked to me for a solid month, but after I scheduled a few clients and started making money, he got behind it. Helped me advertise and eventually helped me buy this place and fix it up.”
I blow out a surprised breath. “That’s…not like the dad I remember you having.”
Canyon fiddles with the tear on his jeans. “He’s changed a lot. I think once he realized my photography had potential, he figured it was worth me pursuing. Which is shallow, since he should’ve been behind my dream because he’s my dad. But it worked out, I guess.”
I pull my ponytail over my shoulder, picking at the dead ends. “It’s just doesn’t seem like your dad to let you off the hook that easily. He was so adamant about you going to med school. Always harping on you about your grades.”
“It’s not like he agreed with it right off the bat,” he argues. “When I said he was pissed, I mean he was livid. He’s drilled med school into my head since before I could talk. I don’t think he ever expected me to change the plan. It took him some getting used to, and I’m lucky he came around like he did. Otherwise I wouldn’t have this place.”
His eyes wander aimlessly around the room, his mouth set in a firm line. He’s upset. I can tell because he’s grinding his teeth together, making the muscle in his jaw spasm.
“I never thought you’d have a place like this,” I say, hoping I’m making things better, not worse. I’m not sure why our conversation turned sour, other than it maybe had to do with talking about his dad. I’d rather avoid a conversation about him anyways.
Canyon lifts his head and leans back against the couch. “Me either. But it sure as hell beats working in a hospital every day for the rest of my life.”
I tilt my head up, studying the grooves in the ceiling. “To be honest, I’m kind of glad you aren’t going to be a doctor.” I muse, rolling my head to look at him. “I think you’d be kind of sucky at it.”
He cocks an eyebrow, a faint smile starting to appear. “Oh really?”
I nod my head, chewing on the corner of my lip. For a split second, his eyes fall to my mouth and then I’m looking into pupils so large, the brown in his eyes is almost nonexistent. He shifts so that he’s facing me, his leg drawn up on the seat, nearly touching my knee. And then it does. Our legs brush and the heat pulsing through my body is enough to brand a hole into the couch.
“Give me one good reason why you think I’d suck at being doctor,” he challenges.
I glance down between us, wishing I could take a deep breath to get oxygen flowing to my lungs. Of course, I was letting total bullshit fly out of my mouth because it’s hard to stop that stuff from spewing out. Honestly, I think Canyon would’ve made a fantastic doctor. He’d make a fantastic anything because he’s talented and smart and even though he broke my heart, he’s the most caring guy I know. I really need to learn to keep my mouth shut.
He’s staring at me, waiting for an answer so I blurt out the first thing that comes to mind. “Scrubs,” I say, almost outwardly cringing when I realize how stupid it sounds. Yet, I still keep talking. “You’d look really freaking bad in scrubs. And white lab coats.”
He snorts a laugh. “Seriously? That’s your answer?”
I shrug. “It’s true.
It’s not.
I’ve seen him in scrubs before. A few months after we met, Canyon shadowed his dad at the hospital. After he’d finished, he came by my house, hung out for an hour and the only thing I could think about all week was how hot he looked in a stupid pair of dark blue scrubs.
Canyon runs a hand over his jaw, still smiling. “I think you’re lying but I’ll let it slide since we both know I’d put McDreamy to shame.”
It’s my turn to snort. “No one can out dream McDreamy.”
“Whatever. I’m McDreamy and McSteamy all rolled into one.”
“More like McFull-of-yourself,” I shoot back and then give him a questioning look. “How do you know who McDreamy and McSteamy are anyway?”
He rubs the back of his neck, biting down on his lip like he just got caught red handed. “I hit a low point in my life okay? I don’t want to talk about it.”
I can’t help the smile the creeps up on my mouth. He watched Grey's Anatomy. And I have blackmail material.
A bell ringing above the door grabs our attention, alerting us of the young couple that just walked in.
I recognize them immediately. Jason Rapport and Lindsey Collins. Jason and Lindsey both went to Alden until Lindsey transferred. They continued to date though, because Jason was oblivious to the fact that Lindsey cheated on him all throughout high school. Jason always seemed like a nice enough guy and I felt sorry for him. I’m definitely sorry that he’s apparently still stuck with a cheating snob like Lindsey when he could clearly do so much better. Her cheating isn’t the reason I dislike her though. I dislike her because ever since she laid eyes on Canyon, she’s been trying to get in his pants. And from the way she’s ogling him right now, I’d say she hasn’t given up trying.
Canyon gets up and I watch in half amusement, half irritation as he shakes Jason’s hand and returns Lindsey’s hug. When she pulls away, her hand trails down his stomach, and then she’s flashing him the monstrous diamond ring on her finger.
Classy.
“Oh my god. Elaine Reynolds, is that you?” Lindsey rushes over like we’re long lost friends, giving me an awkward hug as I remain sitting. I honestly have no clue what to do. She used to hate me in high school, even more so when she found out I was friends with Canyon. I guess she forgot. That or she’s just full of shit.
Lindsey sits down and crosses her legs, the blue sundress she’s wearing riding up her thighs. She steals a quick glance at Canyon to see if he noticed, and I can’t help but check too. Lindsey is gorgeous. Dark red hair that spills around her shoulders, a small nose and pouty lips. Height that girls like me would kill me for. So I’m surprised when I look up and find him staring at me instead. He flashes me a small grin, making one of his dimples appear and it’s not hard to see why Lindsey has been throwing herself at him all these years.
“So where have you been, Elaine? You practically disappeared after graduation.” She addresses me but her attention is still on Canyon. I’m still confused why she’s pretending to give a single crap about me, but I indulge her nonetheless.
“College,” I reply, watching her chew flirtatiously on her lip, “University of Tennessee.”
When Canyon still doesn’t acknowledge her, she faces me, her flawless face beaming. “Wow! College,” she gushes. “You never struck me as the college type. School always seemed to be your brother’s thing. Oh- and football.” She giggles. “Who am I kidding? Parker was good at everything. Some people just get all the talent. It’s a shame ya’ll were in that wreck.”
At that moment, Parker appears from the back room, catching the last part of the conversation. He gives me a sympathetic look as he shakes Jason’s hand. Lindsey hops up, clearly done with talking to me, and leans down to hug Parker. He looks just as awkward as I did, like he’s wondering why the hell she’s hugging him. It’s not like she knows either of us very well. Just what happened to us.
“Do you two want to take your own car or ride with us?” Canyon asks Lindsey.
“We’ll ride with you,” she says, smoothing her hands down her hips. “Parker and Jason can talk football while you and I discuss what I’m thinking for the engagement pictures.” She winks, touching his arm.
I throw up a little in my mouth.
“Alright. Let me get my equipment then we can head out.” He steps around her and looks at me. “Elle, can you help me real quick?”
Lindsey narrows her eyes as I stand up and follow him to the back. It’s a small room with a black back drop, lighting and other props. Canyon stops suddenly, and I collide into his solid chest, his arms gripping my shoulders to steady me.
“Are you okay?” he asks, scanning my face carefully.
“If you’re referring to what Lindsey said, then yes, I’m fine. It’s not anything I haven’t heard before.”
Actually, I’ve heard worse. Especially after the accident. People talked. Spread rumors. Some true. Some not. The true ones always cut the deepest because I couldn’t deny them. I was the reason Parker was paralyzed. The reason he didn’t get to finish college or continue being scouted for the NFL. I was the little sister who lived in her big brother’s shadow. Nothing special. And then I was the person who stripped him bare of all his titles. The person who took his life away.
“Just because you’ve heard it before doesn’t make it easier to hear.” His hands slide down to my wrists and encircle them completely. I lower my head and he presses his thumb to my pulse, almost like he’s trying to find another way to read me since he can’t see my face.
“It’s okay, Canyon. Really. If it had bothered me, you would’ve known it.”
He looks at me, rubbing his lips together uncertainly. He probably thinks I’m lying but for the first time in a while, I’m not. What Lindsey said didn’t bother me because her words are already programed into my brain. And I hear them every day, because I can’t let myself forget.
Canyon releases my wrists and begins gathering his equipment. He silently moves around the room, shoving things into a bag slung over his shoulder.
“I can’t believe you’re taking their engagement picture,” I say, watching him disconnect a lens from his camera. “You know she just wants to screw you, right?”
He shakes his head like I’m joking.
“Oh, I’ll ride with you and then maybe when we’re finished you can ride me.” I twirl my hair and stick out my chest.
Canyon chuckles. “You do a scary good impersonation of her, you know that?” With his head bent, he looks up from the camera, eyes blatantly roaming over my chest. I immediately straighten, but my chest is heaving with each breath, making me feel more exposed than I’d like. The way he’s watching me…I swear he knows exactly what he’s doing. That he’s the only guy who can send my body into a frenzy with one look or shatter me with the sound of his voice. Two years at college and not a single guy could replicate those feelings. I used to wonder if there was something wrong with me because I wasn’t attracted to anyone else and the idea of sex seemed lackluster. Then I figured out my problem. That I still have too much of Canyon coursing through my veins. Pumping him into my heart like a sickness.
“Canyon, you ready?” Parker wheels into the room, stopping short when he sees us. Canyon and I look away at the same time, recognition flashing behind Parker’s eyes as they drift between us. “Sorry to interrupt,” he says slowly, “but if I have to sit through one more second of Lindsey’s gossip, I might start bashing my head against the wall.”
Canyon picks his bag up off the floor and slings it over his shoulder. “Sorry, man. I’ll be there in second.”
Parker nods, catching my eye as he leaves the room. I’d have to be blind to miss the amusement in them.
“Are you coming?”
I blink and turn to find Canyon beside me, pulling a gray beanie over his head. “What?”
He checks his phone before sliding it into his back pocket. “Are you coming with us?”
I realize he’s inviting me to come along on the photo shoot, but considering its Lindsey Collins, I’d rather spare myself the torture. “Actually, no. I don’t think I am. I might call Whitney and see what she’s doing today.”
Canyon nods but doesn’t say anything else as he leaves the room. I follow him into the lobby, say a quick goodbye to everyone and then leave the studio. Since I rode here in Canyon’s van, I have no choice but to walk home. As I step off the sidewalk, I eye the shiny white van with Canyon Beckett Photography branded on the side. It’s over the top fancy, something his dad probably insisted he buy. But what gets me is that it’s wheelchair accessible. When I walked outside this morning and saw it sitting in the driveway, I was floored. Canyon has done so much for Parker. Helped take care of him. Gave him a job. Bought a damn van that’s wheelchair accessible. All for Parker. If anything’s ever made me feel like a shitty sister, this tops it. It terrifies me to think what could’ve happened if Canyon hadn’t stayed. If he’d gone to med school like he was supposed to. The sting of tears burn the back of my eyes but I rapidly blink them away. After everything Canyon has done, I owe him. No matter our past. And if we have one, no matter our future.
>
Chapter Nine
Whitney: Whatever you’re doing, stop
It’s Friday night and I’m lying in bed with a bag of Cheetos and no pants when I get Whitney’s text. This is how I’ve spent every night this week, and my weekend isn’t looking anymore eventful. Not that I’m complaining.
Me: Um, no. I’m watching Friends.
Whitney: There’s a party down at the cove tonight. We’re going.
Me: I don’t want to go to a party.
Whitney: You never want to do anything. Get up and get dressed.
Me: You can’t make me.
I slink underneath the bedspread as if somehow it will keep me safe.
Whitney: I just walked in the front door.
Shit.
Before I can react, my door is being slung open. Whitney narrows her eyes when she sees me peeking out of a small hole in the blanket.
“You’re pathetic, you know that?”
She shuts the door and immediately heads to my closet. Reluctantly, I peel the covers back to see what she’s doing. Or rather, what she’s looking for. Judging by the way she’s dressed, something sexy like the black mini skirt and blue top she’s wearing. Over my dead body.
“Hurry and get your lazy ass up. The party’s already started.”
She stalks over and rips the covers off my partially naked body. I’m wearing a tank top and panties that have little cat faces on them. She busts out laughing.
“I can’t believe you still have those,” she snickers, tossing me the clothes she picked out. She goes to my dresser and pulls out a black thong. “Here. Just in case.”
I snatch the thong from her hand. “What do you mean just in case? I’m not planning on anyone seeing my panties.”
Whitney shrugs, checking her mascara in the mirror. “Maybe not. But it’s better to be safe than sorry.” She looks at me over her shoulder. “Do I need to remind you of the time I was wearing a pair of my mom’s granny panties the same night I got to third base with Clark Benson?”