Anna leaned back against Wilhelm. “Why did you get here so late? I thought you said you would be here earlier today.”
“We got a late start. Issues with the jet, but everything is fine now. We have had that one for many years. It is time for a new one.”
“I guess it was good that you were late.” She sighed. “At least Ben knows the truth about me now.”
“I cannot imagine him not understanding, Liebling. But, it is not easy, knowing that the woman you love is being forced to do things that she does not want to do. Does he know about Alex?”
Anna shook her head. “I didn’t even get a chance to explain all that. Jack interrupted before I could.” She shook her head. “Maybe it’s for the best and it should just end now.” But she didn’t want it to end. She loved Ben. She missed him. As much as she adored Wilhelm and Kurt, she loved Ben and would give anything to be with him.
“Anna, if things…do work out with you two, please do not feel obligated to be with Kurt and I. We want you to be happy.”
She hugged Wilhelm. “Thank you, Wilhelm.”
Wilhelm ordered up dinner a while later and they ate. The two men did their best to cheer Anna up, but it didn’t work very well. She was quiet and miserable the whole evening. But she did her best to not cry, though Wilhelm told her to cry if she needed to.
“Anna, as much as I desire you, I am not going to make you sleep with me,” Kurt said as the movie they were watching ended.
“But.…”
“Anna, I want to make love to you, but only if you want to. And I do not think you really want that right now, do you?”
Anna bit her lip and shook her head slowly.
“It’s all right, Engel. Really.” He chuckled. “I think it might be better if you sleep with Vati though. I do not know if I could control myself if you were in my bed.”
“Kurt…,” she protested.
“Anna, I do not want to hurt you. I do not want to do something unconsciously and make you regret it in the morning. Vati has far more self-control than I do.”
“That comes from self-discipline, Kurt,” Wilhelm laughed.
In the end, Anna went to sleep in Wilhelm’s room, where he simply held her all night. Anna appreciated his big body wrapped around her, giving her unconditional comfort.
*****
Thursday rehearsals were long. Jenna told Anna that she’d seen Ben last night and that he’d been miserable. Jenna had tried to fill in the gaps for him, answering questions as best as she could.
“I think he’ll forgive you, Anna. He loves you a lot and misses you. It’s just a lot to process. I told him how Devin is and it’s not your fault. I even told him what Devin did to me so he would understand the type of person Devin is.”
Anna was hopeful after she talked with Jenna. If she had seen him and talked to him, then maybe he really would forgive Anna.
She kept her phone near her at all times in case Ben tried to call, but her phone remained silent.
When she returned to the hotel that evening, she still hadn’t heard from him.
“Anna, you must give him time,” Kurt said, squeezing her hand. “It is a lot to process.”
Chapter Five
Friday came at last. Anna not only had opening night jitters, but nerves from waiting to see if Ben would call. Would he miss her first ever professional performance in the Nutcracker?
Midday, she checked her phone to find a message from Ben.
“Hey, Anna,” he said. “I’m ready to talk now. I’ll be at the performance tonight and we can talk at the after party, okay? I’ll see you then.”
There was no “I love you” and his voice sounded strained. She couldn’t gather any clues from his message, even after listening to it several times. He was going to end it, she was certain. But then, why would he come to the performance and the party if he was going to end it?
All afternoon she was on pins and needles, anticipating what would happen that night. One minute she was excited and ecstatic, the next she was despondent and in tears.
She tried to focus as she got ready that evening, putting on her stage makeup, fixing her hair, and donning her skimpy gold and green costume. The ritual helped calm her ragged nerves.
A dozen pink roses were sent to her dressing room without a card. She knew they were from Alex and ignored them.
As they waited in the wings for their cue to enter the second act, Travis hugged her and told her everything would be all right. “If he doesn’t forgive you, I’ll go beat him until he does,” Travis whispered in the darkness of the wings.
Anna smiled. “Thanks, Travis.”
She heard their cue and they moved into position. When their music began, she stepped out on stage with Travis behind her, and, like magic, the world fell away until only the dance remained.
*****
After the show reality came crashing back, and Anna rushed to her dressing room to get ready for the party. She smiled as she got ready, knowing she would see Ben soon. She had concluded that the only reason he would be coming tonight was that he still wanted to be with her. Coming to a performance to break things off just didn’t make any sense. Jenna and Travis both agreed.
She listened for a knock at the door while she dressed, hoping Ben would come to her backstage. When she was ready, she decided to text him and let him know she would see him at the party and headed over in her own car.
She didn’t see Ben when she arrived, but saw Wilhelm and Kurt. She made her way over to say hello.
“You were wunderbar, Liebling,” Wilhelm said, kissing her cheek.
“Ja, you were,” Kurt agreed.
“Thank you,” she said with a smile. She told them about Ben’s message.
“Well, then, don’t just stand here. Go find him.” Kurt said.
She turned to go and saw Devin standing behind her. “Hello, Anna. Wonderful performance tonight.” He kissed her cheek. “I’m glad I allowed you to continue dancing.”
Anna smiled nervously. “Thank you, Devin.” She looked around as she spoke, but still no sign of Ben.
“Looking for someone?” Devin asked. If she hadn’t been so preoccupied, the strange tone in his voice might have given her pause.
Anna looked up at him, caught off guard by his inquiry
“Anna, go find Jenna like you said you wanted to,” Kurt said. “You can find me later.”
Anna smiled gratefully at him. “Yes, Kurt. If you’ll excuse me,” she said to both Devin and Wilhelm.
Chapter Six
Devin watched as Anna walked quickly away, eyes scanning the room for her boyfriend. She didn’t know that he wasn’t here; that he wasn’t coming. But Devin knew. He would take care of her distraction once and for all by the end of the weekend. He had warned her about her duties and she chose not to listen. She would certainly listen more carefully after this weekend. Of that, Devin was certain.
*****
“Jenna, Matt, have you seen Ben?” Anna asked anxiously as she approached the couple.
They both shook their heads. “He said he was coming,” Matt said. “We sat next to each other at the theater.”
Anna looked around, fear gripping her heart. Had he changed his mind? She blinked away tears.
Jenna put her hand on her arm. “He’ll be here, Anna. Don't worry. Maybe he had car trouble.”
Anna’s eyes didn’t stop moving the rest of the night. She searched constantly for Ben, but he never came. When people began leaving, hopelessness seized her heart.
Matt looked at her helplessly. “I don’t know what happened. He was coming, I swear.”
She saw Wilhelm walking towards her and ran to him. “He didn’t come,” she sobbed into his tuxedo jacket. Wilhelm hugged her close.
“Who are you?” she heard Matt ask.
“I am Wilhelm Kunze Herzog von Hesse. I am...ah, Anna’s guardian, you might say.”
“Guardian? Then why didn’t you protect—”
“Matt, please,” Jenna interrupted,
and Anna knew Jenna had told Matt about her life, too. “Wilhelm is a good man. He does what he can for Anna.”
“Danke, Jenna. And you are?”
“Matt Bolling. I’m Ben’s roommate.”
“Ah. Yes. Do you know where Ben is? You can see that Anna is quite upset.”
Matt shook his head. “No. It’s weird. He said he’d be here. I can’t imagine what happened. I called him a couple of times, but he didn’t answer.” He sighed. “Maybe he just needed more time to himself.”
Wilhelm hugged Anna closer. “I am truly sorry, Liebling.”
“I’m sure he’ll call you, Anna,” Matt said, putting his hand on her arm. “When I see him. I’ll hit him for you, okay?”
Anna gave a half-hearted laugh. “Okay.”
“Kommen Sie, Anna. Let us return to the hotel.”
Anna waved to her friends and let Wilhelm lead her out of the ballroom. “Where’s Kurt?”
“He…found a new friend,” Wilhelm answered, shaking his head slightly.
Anna was glad for Kurt. She hated the idea of him sleeping alone because of her.
Wilhelm took her back to the hotel, helped her undress and tucked her into bed. Then he turned out the lights and crawled in next to her, pulling her close.
“Wilhelm, do you want me to…?”
“Nein, Anna. You needn’t worry about me. I am fine. It is you that I am worried about.” He kissed her cheek. “I put your phone next to the bed. If he calls, you will hear.”
“Thank you, Wilhelm,” she said softly.
*****
Wilhelm lay in the dark room, holding the precious girl against him. He could feel desire stirring inside him, but that was not what she needed right now. She needed a friend and father, something Devin had denied her. Wilhelm was more of a man than that. He would give Anna what she needed instead of demanding what he wanted.
Devin had acted suspiciously at the party. Wilhelm knew Devin to be hard-hearted, but the way he spoke to Anna made Wilhelm suspect Devin knew more than he let on. Wilhelm certainly would never underestimate Devin again. The Chairman would surely do anything to get his way.
Poor Anna. She was just caught in the middle of all this. It wasn’t right. She deserved some happiness.
But at the same time, the idea of Ben breaking up with her was of some comfort to Wilhelm, even though it broke his heart to see Anna suffering.
He was sure Ben loved her. Wilhelm had asked around about the young lawyer while Anna was gone and had only heard good things about him. But Ben could never give Anna everything she needed. She needed protecting. She needed someone who could face Devin and win.
Devin would eat Ben alive.
She needed Alex, but for some reason unknown to himself, she was furious with him. He had asked her about coming out for the New Year and had never seen such a look on her face as when she said she didn’t want to go. He was a little hurt until he realized that her anger was directed toward Alex and not himself.
Alex hadn’t meant to hurt Anna, but it was a good thing he’d left. Wilhelm was very proud of the effort Alex exerted to learn the old ways. There was much more to learn to be able to defeat Devin, but they had discovered a way for Alex to protect Anna in the meantime. That would be taken care of when she came to visit in a few weeks.
If Ben broke up with her, it would be for the best. For all of them. If he didn’t…well, they’d have to deal with it some other way. Perhaps Wilhelm could talk to him before he went back to Germany. He could explain to Ben what had to happen. If he truly loved her, he would want what was best for her. He just hoped Anna would cooperate.
*****
Anna slept fitfully. She had nightmares about Ben. That he wouldn’t speak to her. That they tried to be together and they couldn’t. That he was dead. In the morning she apologized to Wilhelm for tossing and turning all night, and he was very understanding.
Anna headed to the theater after breakfast. She sought out Jenna as soon as she put her bag in her dressing room.
“Ben didn’t come home last night,” Jenna told her as she paused mid-stretch at the barre. “Matt said he’s done that before. When he’s upset about something, he’ll just go for a drive and not tell anyone. Then he’ll come back and everything will be fine.”
“Then why did he tell me he’d be at the party? I don’t understand.”
“I don’t know, Anna. But I’m sure everything will be okay.”
The day dragged on. There was no call from Ben. No text. No nothing.
Anna found that dancing in the two performances that day provided the only relief from the ache in her heart; a few, precious minutes of distraction in an otherwise dark day. Her heart twisted and her stomach churned the rest of the time. She couldn’t have said whether she danced well or not, and even her friend’s assurances did nothing to cheer her.
She felt terrible about being poor company for Wilhelm, and apologized again and again. “I can go home if you want, Wilhelm. You could find more…pleasant company…if I did.”
“Nonsense, Anna,” Wilhelm said in response, squeezing her hand. “You are not going anywhere. I want to make sure you are all right.”
Wilhelm once again held her all night as she tossed and turned.
Sunday dawned and still Anna hadn’t heard from Ben. She felt so hopeless she could hardly get out of bed.
“Anna, do not give up hope,” Wilhelm said. “He will call.”
Anna drove to the theater and mechanically went through the motions of warming up and getting ready.
She came alive when she danced, and only when she danced. Aside from that, she stared at her phone while sitting in her dressing room.
Chapter Seven
After the last curtain call of the evening, Anna trudged back to her dressing room. She contemplated calling Wilhelm to let him know she was going to go for a drive; she needed some air.
“Hello, Anna.”
Anna jumped when she stepped into the room and saw Ian sitting on her couch.
“Ian? What are you doing here?”
His eyes were hard. Had she done something wrong?
“Devin wants to see you. Tonight.”
Anna took in a shaky breath. What had she done to earn a punishment? “I need to tell Wilhelm—”
“It’s been taken care of.”
She studied Ian closely. He was acting strange; cold and distant. “Ian, what’s wrong?”
“Please, Anna,” he pleaded softly, breaking through the ice for just a split second. Then he was hard again. “Get ready as quickly as you can.”
Anna moved quickly. She didn’t want to anger Devin more if he truly was angry with her. As she dressed, she wracked her brain, trying to figure out what she’d done. When she was ready, Ian led her out the back of the theater to a waiting Town Car. He opened the back door for her and then got in the driver’s seat and drove away.
“Where are we going?” she asked.
“The Manor.”
“Am I to be punished?”
Ian didn’t answer at first. “No,” he said after a few moments of silence.
Something about his manner disturbed her. “Ian. Please. Tell me what’s wrong.” She leaned forward and put her hand on his shoulder.
“Anna, don’t. Just…please be quiet and we’ll be there soon.”
That didn’t help any. Ian’s strange behavior just made her more anxious.
She stared out the window and watched the scenery fly past her. What had she done to anger Devin? Nothing came to mind. He had left her alone for the most part the last month or so. She usually knew what Devin was angry about, but this time she honestly didn’t know.
After what seemed like forever, Ian pulled into the drive to the Manor and a few minutes later, they stopped in front of the huge building.
“Leave your bag,” Ian said stiffly as he opened her door. “Someone will attend to it later.”
Anna followed him silently into the dimly lit entryway. She removed her shoes and expected
Ian to lead her up the stairs to her room or Devin’s. Instead, he led her down a hallway she’d never seen, through a paneled wooden door and into a room that looked like a large living room. The red-carpeted floor was springy and a lit fireplace graced the far wall. Computer monitors lined one sidewall with a long desk below it. The room was shadowed except in the center where Devin sat in a tall chair, his chin resting on steepled fingers.
Anna looked up at Ian.
“Go greet him properly,” he whispered.
Anna felt odd as she walked towards Devin wearing jeans and a sweater. She’d never gone anywhere in the Manor wearing street clothes. She nervously stopped a few feet in front of Devin, dropped to her knees and bowed before him.
“Good evening, Mistress,” Devin said in a gentle tone. “You may sit up. I hope you don't mind my needing you tonight.”
“Whatever would please you, Master,” she said quietly, bringing herself to a sitting position.
“Come, Baby. Suck my cock and then we have some things to discuss.”
Anna immediately moved toward Devin and untied his black linen pants. She took his cock into her mouth and began sucking and licking him as best as she could.
He laced his fingers through her hair. “Good girl,” he murmured. “I love how you always suck my cock so well. So enthusiastically.”
Anna closed her eyes to keep the tears from falling. She wanted Ben so badly, she could almost feel him near her. She missed him terribly. Where on earth could he be?
Devin came in her mouth with a low moan and Anna licked him clean, then returned to her knees and awaited his next instruction.
She stared at the floor between his feet as she felt him staring at her. “You don’t seem happy, Baby. What’s wrong?”
She swallowed. She didn’t want to tell him what was wrong, but she had no choice. He had asked. “I miss…someone.”
“Your boyfriend?”
“Yes.”
“Anna, you’ve been very distracted with him lately. I don’t like it.” Devin said.
“I’ve tried to perform my duties as always, Master.”
“You’re not as enthusiastic about pleasing the men I bring to you. And you’re never home, so if someone wants you, they can’t find you.”
The Life of Anna, Part 3: Embraced Page 3