“Drive safely. I’ll see you soon.” He said as he backed away from the car.
“I will. I’ll keep your father in my prayers too.”
“Thank you Char, I appreciate it. Have a good night.” Eric said before I pulled away.
As I drove away from Elizabeth’s house I felt a sting of pain in my chest but I knew I’d made the right decision. Like Skylar said to me that night, I didn’t want to take something that wasn’t mine to take. It wouldn’t have felt right. On our way home I thought about the night Lucy was conceived. Being with Eric made me think about Skylar. Thinking about him brought a smile to my face.
I had kept Eric’s dad in my prayers as promised. At Thanksgiving, when it was my turn to give thanks, I thanked God for Lucy, our health, and all the people that God had brought into our lives over the past year. CeCe joined my family for Thanksgiving but seemed distant or overly stressed from studying for upcoming exams. She said that political science classes were consuming and that her parents were not of any help to take the load off. CeCe’s parents graduated with high honors from both undergraduate and graduate law programs. She confided to me that she continued to struggle and was pulling all-nighters, at least once or twice a week to pass her tests. She looked tired and less of her usual perky self. I proposed that we take another day during Thanksgiving break to go somewhere fun. She said she wanted to but needed the time instead to study for finals. I told her I understood but was a little let down. Hoping to take her mind off matters, I shared that I’d run into Eric and that we hung out once. I assured her that he had asked about her and was interested in how she was doing these days. CeCe seemed to brighten a little and was excited to hang out with him over Christmas break if she could just get through finals and her parent’s insistence with her grades.
Thanksgiving break ended for CeCe and she went back to school, wary for her approaching finals. Eric came several times to the diner and let me know that his father’s radiation appointments went well. We joked back and forth and talked about Lucy and Aiden. I told him that CeCe would be home in a week for Christmas break. Eric seemed excited. I was looking forward to spending time with CeCe after the finals, that she had been dreading, were over. I had talked to her far less this semester than usual. She was always busy with studying or Tri-Delta events.
It was nine o’clock. I picked up the phone and dialed CeCe’s number. She answered the phone.
“CeCe, it’s Char—I’m just checking to make sure you’re still coming home tomorrow.” I asked over all the background noise.
“Yes. I’m so thankful my finals are over. I’m going to a party tonight with some of the girls and I so badly need to just unwind. I’ve never had this much stress in my life.”
“I’m so glad you’re done with your exams. Why is it so loud CeCe?”
“Oh, we’re getting a little party on before we head over to the frat house.”
“Okay, well don’t get too much party on—be careful Ce.”
“I’ll be fine—you’re too behaved Char. I just need a good party.” She said sounding possibly tipsy.
“What? I’m too behaved? Single-mom over here?” I asked surprised by her comment.
“I’m just joking. I love you Charlotte Renee. I gotta let you go. We’re leaving; I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”
“Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow CeCe. Have fun—but be careful. Make sure you stay with the girls—you sound like you’ve been drinking.” I said concerned.
“I’m fine. Just fine. Really fine—now that finals are over. I’ll be Okay mom.” She laughed.
Slightly offended I replied, “Alright, I just care about you and want you to be safe CeCe.”
“I’m fine. I’ll call you when I get home tomorrow.” CeCe said before hanging up the phone.
I could tell CeCe had been drinking, which wasn’t completely unusual at school. However, she sounded drunk and vulnerable. I worried about her being so far away. If I were there I could at least make sure she didn’t make any bad decisions. I said a prayer for her and went to bed with Lucy.
Chapter 17: Secrets
The next day CeCe never called. I had worried about her despite her unfamiliar rudeness to me over the phone. I didn’t want to call her parents and upset them unnecessarily. I figured I’d wait till evening and call her if she hadn’t called by then. I was excited to see CeCe—hoping that she’d be a little less anxious now that finals were over. I planned a bonfire at the beach for the day after she got home from school with Richie, Eric, CeCe and I. I had gotten my mom and dad to watch Lucy and figured this would be a great way for CeCe to get to know Eric and a nice way for her to unwind from her parents and school.
Evening came and still no call. I was mad that she hadn’t called me. She had gotten a new, smaller, cell phone, a few months ago, to replace the larger cell phone she carried mostly in her car. I tried calling her cell phone several times at five, six and seven PM. All I got was voicemail each time I attempted to call her. My frustrations started to turn in to worry. I called once more, this time calling her parent’s home, and asked for CeCe. Her mother answered the phone.
“Hi, Mrs. Crawford; I was wondering if CeCe got home yet?”
“Yes she is. She got home a few hours ago but she’s sleeping. Can I have her call you tomorrow?” Beverly said in a cool voice.
“Sure, thank you Mrs. Crawford.” I said feeling a touch of anger rise up from the pit of my stomach.
“Okay dear. I will have her call you then. Charlotte, how’s Lucy doing?” Beverly asked.
“Thank you, she’s good. She’s getting big so fast.” I replied surprised by her asking since she sees her at mass every week.
“Oh good to hear; I’ll let Cecilia know you called; have a good night Charlotte.” She said before hanging up.
CeCe had been home for several hours and hadn’t bothered to answer my phone calls or even call to let me know she got home safely. She didn’t have the common courtesy to call her best friend to let her know she was still alive. She was rude to me over the phone and then didn’t even say goodbye before she hung up last night. I know she was drinking and with her other friends but I would never talk to her or treat her like that. Was she mad at me? Was she outgrowing me? I was feeling hurt and angry that she didn’t think enough of me to at least call so I didn’t think she was in some ditch somewhere. I had the opportunity to go out with a really nice, really hot guy and turned it down for her and now she treats me like this? Granted, she didn’t know that Eric kissed me or that we had a really nice evening of light flirting and much laughter. Unless she did know and that was why she was acting like a turd.
Angry at CeCe, I figured I would just get Lucy and go to bed early since I wasn’t going to be seeing her this evening. The next morning came and CeCe had still failed to call me. At this point, I was getting less interested in hearing from her—the longer she took to call me back. I had done nothing wrong. I was a good friend. For her to treat me with such insincerity was bothersome. What had happened?
About five PM I called CeCe after no word from her since she arrived home yesterday.
“Hello?” I heard CeCe’s voice.
“Hello?” I said sounding a bit perturbed.
“Hi Char. I’m sorry I didn’t call you. I’m not feeling good.” CeCe said yawning.
“I’m sorry to hear that but why didn’t you at least call me when you were driving home so I knew you were okay?”
“You’re not my mother are you?” CeCe said brashly.
“CeCe! What is going on? You hung up the phone on me before that party and you didn’t even call me like you said you would. You had enough time to call when you were driving. I was worried about you because I knew you were drinking and have been very stressed lately. And no, I’m not your mother but I am a good mother and a better friend than how you’re behaving right now.”
“Chill out Char. I don’t need more people yelling at me or telling me what I’m doing wrong.”
�
��Me—chill out? What has happened to you—to us? I love you CeCe and you are being so hurtful. I just care about you and miss you and I’ve been waiting for you to come home. I even set up a surprise bonfire tonight for us to hang out with Eric and Richie at the beach.”
“I’m sorry Char. I’m not feeling very good. That was nice of you but I’m not going to be able to come out tonight.”
“CeCe—what is going on? Do you want me to come over?” I asked hearing something in her crackled voice.
“No, I’m just not feeling well. I’m in bed. Tell Eric and Richie I said hi tonight.”
“Are you sure? I can come over. I don’t like fighting with you CeCe. You’re my best friend—I was really worried about you and I miss you.” I said feeling frustrated with how quickly the conversation went to pot.
“I’m sorry too Char. I’m sure. I just need sleep. I’ll call you when I’m feeling better. It’s been a really long semester and I just need some rest.”
“Okay then, call me after you’ve gotten enough rest or if you need anything or anyone…like your best friend.”
“Thank you Char.”
“You’re welcome Ce, I love you.”
“I love you too, goodnight.”
“Goodnight CeCe.” I hung up the phone.
Something had changed but I wasn’t sure what. Her feeling better and needing rest ended up taking another two weeks. CeCe hadn’t bothered calling and was a no-show to Christmas Eve mass and Christmas at our house. Although difficult, I avoided making the first phone call to her. I wanted badly to speak with CeCe and see her but wanted to know that she still felt the same way about our friendship. She was my best friend and only lived five minutes away but her absence while home made it no different than when she was five hours away at school. I was on winter break from school as well and although busy with raising Lucy and working at the diner, I managed to fill in CeCe’s absence with Eric. When Eric asked about CeCe, I said that she was getting over some flu and didn’t want to get anyone else sick. I didn’t want to pull him into any drama or poison him against her. I just wanted my best friend back but in the meantime Eric’s companionship was very welcoming and made life, living singly, a little less lonely.
I saw CeCe twice before she went back to school. Once we went to the movies and talked very little. Our conversations were mostly superficial with little meat or grit. The second time she visited me at the diner, I was working. We were busy at the time she came in and I spent very little time with her as I was busy running trays of food back and forth, taking orders, and ringing up checks. CeCe, for some reason, had been avoiding me for the most part. If someone had heard our conversations, they wouldn’t be able to tell we were best friends. CeCe had changed. I hadn’t; I was still the same girl, except with more responsibilities now. Sadness filled my heart as she left for school with little emotion towards me. Like Skylar, once again, I felt abandoned by someone so close and dear to me.
Months had passed since I’d seen or heard from CeCe. It was almost April and I was getting ready to graduate with my Associates degree. Her absence from my life made it hard to write my book about best friends. I grew closer to Eric, as a friend, and we spent more time with him and Aiden. Eventually, I opened up to him about the displacement of my friendship with CeCe. He listened and offered no suggestions or judgment. He merely listened until finally I had little left to say about the condition of our friendship. Our conversations slowly changed from CeCe to other topics. Eric played the piano for me. He had written a ballad. It was untitled or at least he said it was. The notes were deep and soulful just like him. When he played, everything else faded away. He was lost in the music and so was I. It was hard not to get caught up in the moment. I questioned if I had made the right decision to be just friends. But deep down inside, despite his perfection in almost every way, I still felt a loyalty to CeCe and couldn’t think of betraying that if she still had an interest in him.
Graduation was around the corner and I decided to call CeCe to invite her to my big day. I was proud, that even though delayed, I had accomplished what many said I probably wouldn’t have being a young, single-mother. I would not be stopped. This was just the groundwork for my career in journalism. The last time I sat in a cap and gown my best friend sat beside me, cheering me on. I wanted so badly for CeCe to come and be with me this day. I had worked so hard and put so many hours in to make this a reality. I wanted the most important people there to share my achievement. I wanted—needed CeCe there. I sent an invitation to her school address and left her a voicemail twice.
Graduation Day came and all of my family with Lucy, Aunt Juanita, Trudy, and Eric sat in the audience. I sat, somberly, on the stage with my fellow graduates. This time I had no speech to give. All I had to do was to sit and enjoy the moment. I sat and stared at the empty chair where CeCe was supposed to sit. I couldn’t help but take this personally. I knew she was busy, but it was a Saturday. She could have driven down the night before. She could have called to say she couldn’t make it and wished me congratulations, but she didn’t. As the ceremonies ended and our family got up to leave, I spotted CeCe’s parents. They walked towards us with Beverly holding a blue envelope and James holding a bouquet of flowers.
“Hi Charlotte, CeCe wasn’t able to make it and asked if we could come to congratulate you.” Beverly said, smiling.
“That was so nice of you Bev.” My mother said, reaching out to hug her.
“These are for you.” James said, handing me the bouquet of flowers.
“And this too.” Beverly placed a blue envelope in my other hand.
“Thank you, that was so nice of both of you.” I said still in shock to see them at my graduation.
Beverly carefully bent down, in her dress, to Lucy’s height, “You are getting so big and so pretty like your mama.”
Lucy smiled and held onto my knee, hiding partially behind my leg.
“Would you like to come over sometime and go swimming in our pool? No one uses it with CeCe being gone all the time.” Beverly said looking up at me.
“Thanks, I’m sure she’d enjoy that. She loves the water.”
“Well feel free to come over whenever. You don’t need an invitation.” Beverly said before standing back up and straightening her dress.
“We have to get going, congratulations Charlotte.” James said.
“Thank you both for coming. When you talk to CeCe, will you please tell her I said hi?” I asked.
“We will if we can get a hold of her. She’s always so busy.” Beverly said rolling her eyes.
“Thank you both.” My mother said shaking James’s hand and nodding at Beverly.
“Bye.” I said waving.
“That was weird.” Richie piped up.
I looked at my mother and Eric—the two people who knew I was hurt by CeCe’s absenteeism. I was surprised that she had sent them and that they actually came. I hadn’t said anything to Richie about CeCe as he was immersed in his current play and I didn’t want to bother another person with my CeCe issues. I found it strange though as CeCe grew farther apart from me; her mother seemed more congenial now then she did the whole time we were growing up.
We went to Tru Rox for a celebratory dinner. Trudy closed the diner that Saturday night for a small graduation dinner in my honor. It was nice. I was blessed to have so many good people around me that I tried not to think of CeCe and her almost non-existence in my life. I received many cards, gifts, and well-wishes. I opened the card from Beverly and James. Inside were five words ‘Charlotte, a job well done’ written in Beverly’s handwriting, along with two-hundred dollars. I could feel the tears waiting to fall as I fought them back with so many people present. Eric slipped me his card, later in the evening while people were busy talking loudly and laughing. He gave Lucy a hug and twirled her around, with flying giggles, before he came back over to where I was sitting. He gave me a hug and congratulated me one more time before he left.
“What’s up with you guys?” Ric
hie asked.
“We’re just friends Rich.”
“Why? He’s a great guy and obviously he cares about you.” Richie remarked.
“He is a great guy and a wonderful friend. But he’s just a friend.” I said trying to convince myself.
“Yeah, he’s better than some other friends of yours.” Richie said sarcastically.
“Richie don’t say that about CeCe.”
“I didn’t mention any names, you did.” He looked at me.
“Her parents gave me two-hundred dollars in their card.”
“Yeah, her parents did not CeCe—CeCe didn’t even show up. What’s going on with her?” He asked, looking for a truthful answer.
“I don’t know. It really bothers me but I’ve done everything I can. I can’t make her be my friend.”
“No, but you can’t put your life on pause because CeCe decides to take a hiatus from being your best friend.”
“I’m not.”
“Really? Eric Sothersby, a nice, guy who would do anything for you—who follows you around all the time—who’s good to your daughter—who’s perfect for you— is interested in you and you keep him at the friend’s level because you’re waiting for CeCe to make up her mind—to decide if she’s going to come back and like him instead? I love CeCe too—you know that. Char, when are you going to do something good for yourself?”
“What are you talking about Richie? I just finished my Associates degree in journalism—something I’ve always wanted.”
“Char—you know you can’t just work at Trudy’s for the rest of your life—that’s her dream not yours. Your degree is only part of it—you can’t forget about your heart.”
“I’m trying to enjoy this day, not be a moppy mess.”
“Okay, I’ll leave you alone for now. But what are you going to do if you miss the right opportunity when it was right in front of you all along?”
“Then I’ll have to deal with it when it happens. I just want to try and enjoy this moment as much as possible.”
“I love you sis. I want all the wonderful things in this life for you. Eric is one of them. At least consider him a possibility?”
Southern Belles, a Novel About Love, Purpose & Second Chances (9781310340970) Page 24