Her face flushed a pretty pink and he was almost distracted enough to let it go . . . almost. “I’d be thinkin’ ye’d known me for about eight years.”
Jessi’s eyes glassed over. “How can ye say that when I’ve loved—”
Ashamed that he’d pushed her to tears, Reilly walked over to where she stood. “If ye remember, lass, yer da and yer ma didn’t let ye run wild until ye were at least five years old.”
She ducked her head and stared down at her feet.
“As to the other good bit of news ye’ve just shared with me, I’m pleased that ye love me.”
“I don’t—”
He held out a hand to her. When she refused to take it, he traced a finger along the line of her jaw and down to the tip of her chin. “Ye do. I’ve always wondered if that wasn’t what had ye followin’ along behind us.” He brushed a strand of hair from her eyes. “I’d hoped ye’d forgotten about me, especially when me ma wrote and told me about Sean McNulty courtin’ ye.”
“He didn’t court me.”
“Ah,” Reilly said, gently placing his hands on her shoulders and pulling her closer. “So ye haven’t left anyone pinin’ for ye at home.”
Jessi’s eyes darkened to a warm, deep brown, and he knew she was distracted by her temper. “I’ve left hundreds. There’s William Feeney, Michael Landers—”
Reilly pulled her against him and said, “But ye only love me.”
“I don’t—”
He silenced her protest with his mouth. Drinking in the sweetness he hadn’t known existed until he touched her, he tasted heaven in her innocent kiss.
Reilly smiled down at her. “Aye, ye do.”
Jessi sighed. “I refuse to love a man who doesn’t love me back.”
“Give me time to get to know ye, lass,” he asked. “I admire yer spunk and yer backbone.”
“Admirin’ isn’t the same as lovin’.”
“It’s the first step,” Reilly said, pressing his lips to hers once more. “I’m thinkin’ ye taste of home,” he admitted. “Though I may need another taste to be sure.”
Jessi placed her hands on his chest and shook her head at him. “If ye truly admire me and think ye want to get to know me, ye’ll have to court me.”
“Court ye?” Confused, he said, “But ye’ve already agreed to marry me.”
“That I did,” Jessi admitted. “But I may have been a bit hasty and put the cart before the horse, and ye know ye’ll never get anywhere travelin’ like that.”
“She’s got you there, John.”
“Inga,” Reilly started, “I forgot you were there.”
“That’s quite a compliment to you, Jessi.” Inga smiled at the couple. “But since you’ve noticed me, I have to say I agree with Jessi. There’s no reason not to court her.”
“But ’tisn’t the same as back home,” Reilly protested. “We don’t have a priest to read the banns for three weeks in a row.”
“But we do have a church, even though the preacher isn’t due for another few weeks yet.”
“I’ll never understand why ye can’t find one who’ll stay put,” Jessi said.
“They follow the circuit and visit a number of towns, baptizing babies, performing marriages and reading from the good book.”
“But why?” Jessi asked Inga, but Reilly was the one who answered.
“The towns in our new state are spread far and wide. The preacher has a lot of people who need him, lass.”
“We can’t get married until the priest—or preacher, since there are no priests out here—has read the banns for three weeks in a row. Ye know that John.”
“How about a compromise,” Inga suggested.
“What did ye have in mind?” Reilly hoped it was something he could live with. He had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach that the longer he put off marrying Jessi, the more reasons the lass would have for not marrying him. That she would marry him wasn’t up for discussion. As far as he was concerned, the question wasn’t whether she would be his bride, but when.
“We could call a town meeting,” Inga suggested, “and Reilly could explain the custom, and we could have Doc read the banns.”
Jessi was shaking her head, not a good sign.
“Yer being stubborn, Jessi.”
She looked up at him and bit her lip. “I can’t help it. ’Tisn’t the same here.”
He took her hand in his and cupped her face in his other hand. “Give it a chance, lass. This land is wide and beautiful and has much to offer.”
“More than County Cork?”
Reilly’s gaze softened, knowing she must be homesick. “Aye, lass. Will ye at least consider Inga’s idea?”
She shrugged. “Do I have a choice?”
Reilly pulled her into his arms and hugged her close and whispered, “Ye’ll always have a choice, lass.”
“Then I don’t have to get married?”
He couldn’t help it; he laughed. “Except in that, lass.”
Chapter Fifteen
“But I thought you wanted to marry John?”
The look on Pearl’s face matched the expression on Inga’s when Jessi’d told Inga the same thing yesterday.
Jessi looked at one of the four women who had befriended her from the first moment she arrived in town. “Why haven’t ye joined Millicent and the others?”
Pearl snorted. “As if I’d do that. Millicent Peabody isn’t just mean,” Pearl told her. “She’s stupid, too.”
Jessi couldn’t believe her ears. “Are ye sayin’ ye think the woman’s not smart?”
“No,” Pearl corrected her. “I’m saying she’s stupid. Dumb, if you prefer that word.”
“I’m guessin’ ye don’t mean dumb as in mute.”
Pearl grinned, “And that, my dear, is one of the differences between you and Millie Peabody. You take the time to be sure you understand what someone is telling you. Millie jumps to conclusions, and thinks she understands, when in reality…”
“Ye think she’s stupid.” Jessi snickered. “I understand ye fine, Pearl.”
“It’s so gratifying.”
“But half of the town still thinks I set the fire.” Jessi didn’t know how she was going to get through to the people who had recently chosen to treat her like she was a pariah. If they wouldn’t get close enough for her to explain, how would she get their attention without shouting at them?
Remembering John’s suggestion about announcing his intentions to marry her, she said, “I just thought of a way to get through to the people Millicent has control over.”
Pearl lifted her teacup, sipped and set it back down on its saucer. “Do tell.”
“Ye know how John’s got his heart set on marryin’ me?”
Pearl grinned. “Yes.”
“Well, I’ve decided to go along with his plan to have Doc begin reading the banns this coming Sunday.”
“That’s wonderful—”
“But instead,” Jessi said, “I say we have Doc stand at the pulpit and ask everyone who was in town the night of the fire to come forward.”
Pearl leaned forward, intrigued. “And?”
“Then we ask each one to tell Doc what they were doin’ when they heard the crackle of lightning and boom of thunder.”
“What if they didn’t hear it?”
“They’d have had to have been deaf. And we know no one in town is deaf, but we do know of a few people who are dumb and blind.”
Pearl got up and hugged Jessi. “I think it’s a wonderful idea. I’m just sorry I wasn’t in town that night.”
“ ’Tis all right,” Jessi reassured her as Pearl returned to her seat. “Inga and I were, and we’re not backing down.”
“But what about Doc announcing Reilly and your intentions to marry in three weeks?”
Jessi hesitated, unsure how to talk to anyone about her reasons for not wanting to marry John—or anyone.
Pearl lifted her cup to sip, but paused. “Has anyone ever told you that I’ve been married before?”
>
Jessi nodded.
“Did they tell you I was married to a bastard?”
The younger woman shook her head. “Do ye mean by birth or that he was cruel to ye?”
Pearl stared off into space for so long, Jessi thought she wouldn’t answer the question. Finally, Pearl looked back at her.
“More than cruel, Jessi. There are some things a man can do to a woman that make her feel less than human. But she’s not, no matter what horrible things are done to her. If someone believes in her heart that what she thinks and feels is right, then no one can make her into something she isn’t.”
Jessi looked down at her folded hands. Could she talk to Pearl? What if her friend thought she was something beyond contempt, like Mrs. Peabody did? Unable to take that chance, she got up to clear the cups away and wash the few dishes they’d used while Inga lay down for a little while.
“When you’re ready to talk, please remember I’m here and know what you’ve gone through.”
Jessi whirled around and placed her hands on the table. “Ye have no idea what they did to me!”
Pearl nodded. “That’s only because you haven’t told me.”
“And I mean for it to stay that way.”
“If you don’t talk about it, Jessi,” Pearl said quietly, “you haven’t a hope in hell of moving past it and getting on with your life.”
“What life?” Jessi cried. “A man I’ve loved forever has asked me to marry him, but not because he loves me as I love him.” She paused to draw in a breath. “But because he feels responsible for what happened to me.”
“How do you know for sure?”
Jessi’s hands trembled as she remembered when and how John proposed. “Ye were there when he told me I was marryin’ him. What else can I possibly think?”
Pearl got up and wrapped her arms around Jessi and held on tight. “Have you asked him why he wants to marry you?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Jessi asked, pushing back from Pearl.
Pearl shook her head. “Not to me. Why do you think he’s determined to marry you?”
“Absolution.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Pearl told her.
“If ye think I’m so smart, then why do ye doubt me on this? I’ve known John forever.”
“Through a child’s eyes, and you’ve loved him with a child’s heart.”
“No!” Jessi stepped back and wrapped her arms around her waist. “The day he walked up that plank and boarded that ship was the day me heart broke for the first time.” Jessi put a fist to her breast. “I felt it in here every day for six long years until I saw him in the street.” She had to stop to clear the tightness in her throat. “When he didn’t know me, me heart broke for the second time. All that time I’d pined for him, he hadn’t thought of me at all.”
Pearl’s eyes filled with tears, as she shared Jessi’s pain. “But do you know the man he’s become? Six years is a long time, longer still when you’ve traveled as far as John has, and done all that he’s done.”
“What do ye know if it?” Jessi demanded.
“I know that he was nearly trampled by a bull down in Texas.”
Jessi’s hand flew to her mouth. “Mother of God! When did this happen?”
Pearl shrugged. “I don’t know the exact date, but I do know that it was before he and Flynn followed Seamus here to Emerson.”
“They all came together? How long have they known each other?”
“You don’t know?” Pearl asked, and waited for Jessi to answer.
“No.”
“Did you know that John would risk his life or fight to the death for a friend?”
“He hadn’t had any reason to do as much back home,” Jessi finally admitted.
“He has here,” Pearl told her. “More than once.”
Jessi knew she shouldn’t care, but she had to ask, she had to know. “Has he—has there been…”
Pearl shook her head. “In all the time he’s lived and worked out at the Flaherty ranch, he hasn’t courted anyone.”
“Thank ye for tellin’ me, Pearl, but there’s more that I need to know.” Jessi swallowed and asked, “Has he been to any bawdy house?”
Pearl smiled. “John’s a decent man. He’s never once treated me as less of a person because of the rumors that have abounded in this town for as long as I’ve lived here.”
“What kinds of rumors?”
Pearl hesitated, then asked, “Do you want to sit outside?”
“If it’s too hard to tell, ye don’t need to. It won’t matter a bit, because I’ll not be thinkin’ less of ye, no matter what anyone says.”
“I’m proud to have you for a friend,” Pearl said. She asked, “If you feel that way, then why won’t you tell me what happened?”
“I might, but I’m not ready to yet. I’m going to check on Inga and then get started on one or two of the recipes John’s ma gave me.”
“She must have hoped you’d have time to bake for her son.”
“Oh, ’tis more than that,” Jessi said, setting out the ingredients. “Ye see, we planned—”
She drew in a sharp breath, realizing what she’d been about to say, and watched as Pearl’s eyes narrowed at her. “Why did you come all the way from Ireland?”
Jessi knew she’d have to tell her friends sooner or later; she might as well start with Pearl. “Do ye want the truth of it, or shall I make up somethin’ I think you’d want to hear?”
Pearl’s expression changed and she laughed. “Why don’t we start with what you think I want to hear and work our way around to the real reason?”
“Well, then,” Jessi began, taking one of Inga’s aprons off the peg where she kept them and tying it around her, “I’ve always wanted to travel.”
Pearl snickered, making Jessi feel lighter than she had for weeks. “And then there was the opportunity for me to face a horrendous storm at sea with thirty-foot waves.”
When Pearl finally stopped laughing, Jessi wiped her hands on her apron and smiled. “Mrs. Reilly decided that if John wasn’t coming home, and he hadn’t yet found a wife in this huge country, then maybe he needed a girl from back home.”
Jessi measured out the sugar and cut in the butter. “She gave me their family Bible and John’s favorite recipes, along with her secret weapon only to be used in case of a dire situation.”
“Let me guess, this secret weapon had to do with John having a weak spot in his jaw.”
“How did ye know?”
Pearl smiled. “He sported a bruise the size of a small fist on his chin for days, and I heard that he landed flat on his back, so I’d guess something must have hit the front of him to have him land on his back.”
“You’re not mad at me for deceivin’ John?”
“How have you deceived him?” Pearl asked.
“Well,” Jessi said, slowly, “I didn’t tell him why I’m here.”
“Has he asked?”
“More than once.”
“When will you tell him?”
“I’m thinkin’ I’ll let him ask me a few more times first.”
“You’ll tell him before the wedding?”
“Actually,” Jessi said, adding a portion of the flour to the butter mixture. “I’m thinkin’ it isn’t fair for me to marry the man just because his mother and I think it’d be grand.”
Pearl nodded. “I agree, but why wait?”
“I want to give him a chance to get to know me. He still thinks of me as the scrawny knock-kneed girl who chased all over Cork after him.”
“Did you?”
“Chase him?” Jessi smiled. “Aye. But he never let me catch him.” Jessi sighed. “More’s the pity.”
“Do you want to get to know John?”
“I’ve learned a bit about him already,” Jessi confessed. “And I like what I’ve learned, but I’d really like the time for him to understand why I’ve come and why his mother would send me.”
“What if he can’t accept it?”
“I’d have
to live with that, now wouldn’t I?”
“Would you leave town?” Pearl asked.
Jessi looked around the kitchen and then out the back door. “I’m not sure. I like the friends I’ve made and what I know of the town, exceptin’ Mrs. Peabody and the outlaws.” She shuddered. Best not to think of them right now.
“Have you told anyone else why you’re here yet?”
Jessi shook her head. “No. I haven’t had the chance.”
“Do you mind if I talk to Maggie?”
Jessi shook her head. “I was thinkin’ it might be time to tell the others as well.”
“And Bridget and Inga?”
“Aye. Ye’ve all been so wonderful to me, I feel like I’m deceivin’ the lot of ye as well.”
“Can you and Inga come out to our home tomorrow afternoon?” Pearl asked.
“I’m sure I can convince Inga.”
“Convince me to do what?”
“Inga!” Jessi whirled around. “Ye should be sleeping.”
“I was,” she said, walking toward them. “I’m finished.”
Pearl laughed, and Jessi rolled her eyes. “Doc will have me hide.”
“He’ll get over it,” Pearl said quietly.
“There are some things a man doesn’t get over,” a deep voice rumbled.
“Well, now,” Jessi smiled. “If it isn’t me favorite lawman.”
“You know more than one?” Justiss asked, making her laugh.
“Do ye want the truth,” Jessi asked, repeating what she’d said to Pearl earlier, “or shall I tell ye what I think ye want to hear?”
Pearl shook her head and told him, “I’d go with the truth from that one.”
Jessi smiled and felt warm inside. It was wonderful to make new friends and be able to tell them things you wouldn’t tell anyone else. Special things—scary things…just things.
“We’ll be takin’ Inga out to Pearl’s house tomorrow.”
Justiss’s eyes darkened. “Are you sure you should be riding in the wagon?”
His concern for Inga came through loud and clear.
“I didn’t think about it.” Turning toward Pearl, Jessi asked, “Could ye ask everyone to come here?”
“There’s no reason I can’t see Pearl tomorrow,” said Inga.
The Irish Westerns Boxed Set Page 91