The vaccine and the blood tests—cheap little home kits, like pregnancy tests—are the final fingers in the dam against rising tide of the Hive. If they should fail…
Jack drag-bounces the cart to his third-floor apartment—his fortress islet within the atoll of his closed-off block—and knocks on the door; he has a key but Gia's so edgy these days he figures it'll go easier on her nerves if he doesn't just barge in.
"Oh, Jack!" he hears her say through the door, and he knows she's got her eye to the peep lens, but he detects a strange note in her voice. Something's up.
And when she opens the door and he sees her red eyes and tear-streaked face, he knows it.
"What's wrong?"
She pulls him inside, leaving the cart in the hall, and closes the door.
"The test!" she sobs. "Vicky and I—we're positive!"
Jack's heart drops. Gia's been obsessed with the virus, and rightly so, to the point where she's been testing the three of them every day. Jack's been buying kits by the gross, figuring if it gives her peace of mind, then fine, do it twice a day if you want.
But in the back of his mind he's always dreaded the possibility of this moment: the false positive.
"No." His tongue is an arid plain. "No, that can't be. There's got to be a mistake!"
She's shaking her head, fresh tears spilling onto her cheeks. "I just repeated it. Same result."
"Then it's a bad batch."
"Same batch as yesterday."
Jack can't accept this. He moved them here so he could protect them, keep them safe. They've been under his wing, rarely leaving the apartment.
The sick feeling in his stomach worsens as an appalling thought hits him like a runaway train: Is it my fault? Did I bring it home?
"Do it again," he says. "All three of us this time."
Gia nods and wipes her eyes. "Okay." She turns and calls, "Vicky!"
"What?" says a little girl's voice from one of the back rooms.
"Come in here for a minute, okay?"
"But I'm watching a movie!"
"You've seen that movie a hundred times already. Come here just for a second, okay?"
"The Parent Trap again?" Jack says, trying to look cheerful as Vicky mopes in.
"And I was just at the good part where they find out they're sisters!"
"That the nice thing about videos—you can stop them any time and pick up later right where you left off."
Gia has seated herself at Jack's rolltop. "Let me have your finger, Vickie."
A groan, an eye roll. "Not again!"
"Come on. One more time. Jack's doing it this time too."
"Oh, okay."
She walks over to Gia and presents her finger, flinches as her mother stabs the tip with a microlancet, and allows a drop of blood to be milked onto the circle of absorptive paper in the center of the test kit card.
"There," Gia says with a smile Jack knows is forced. "Was that so bad?"
"No. Can I see my movie now?"
"Sure."
As Vicky hurries off, sucking her tiny wound, Gia's trembling fingers squeeze a drop of reagent from its bottle onto the bloodied circle. She glances at her watch, puts the card aside, and looks up at Jack.
"Your turn."
Jack allows his finger to be subjected to the same ritual. Barely feels the prick. Soon his blood sample is doused in reagent and waiting for ten minutes to pass.
And Gia's makes three.
The wait feels interminable, with Gia pacing back and forth, rubbing her hands as if scrubbing them, a beautiful young blond Lady Macbeth working at a stubborn stain. Jack opens his mouth twice to say something, anything to soothe her raw nerves, but can't think of a damn thing that isn't lame or inane.
Finally she looks at her watch and says, "Time." But she doesn't move. "Jack… will you? I can't… I just…"
"Sure, Gi."
Jack steps to the desk, flips the three cards over and, carefully maintaining their sequence, lifts the rear panels. One by one, the flip side of the absorbent paper is revealed, and around the blood spots on the first and third cards… a blue halo. Around the second, only a ring of moisture.
Jack closes his eyes and feels the room rock around him.
Can't be. This isn't happening. Got to be a mistake. We've all been vaccinated, we all eat the same, drink the same, and I'm the one who's in and out, I'm the one with all the exposure. It should be me, not them.
He opens his eyes and looks again, begging for a different outcome. But nothing has changed: two positives flanking a negative.
Gia is staring at him. "Well?"
Jack swallows. "Positive." His voice is a hoarse rasp. He quickly gathers up the cards. "All three."
"Oh, Jack," Gia sobs, floating toward him. "Not you too!"
She flings herself against him and they stand there clinging to each other, Gia weeping, Jack's throat too tight to speak.
He crumples the test cards in his fist. Can't let Gia know. If she learns he's negative she'll blame Vicky's infection on the only other person the child could have caught it from: her. She'll never accept that she could have caught it from Vicky. Gia will assume all the guilt, and it will crush her.
And Jack's negative will open a gulf between them—she'll recede from him, fearing that a kiss, a caress, even a word spoken too close will infect him, and Jack couldn't bear that, not now, not when she needs him most.
"Christ, I'm so sorry, Gia," he manages. "I must have brought it home."
"But how can that be? We took every precaution. And the vaccine…"
"Doesn't work. That's been the word on the street lately. Now we know it's true."
She buries her face against his chest and sobs again. "Vicky… I can't bear the thought…"
"I know," he says, pulling her closer against him and feeling a sob building his own throat at the thought of Gia and Vicky becoming meat puppets controlled by the Hive. "I know."
What now? he asks himself, trying to corral his panicked, skittering thoughts. What can I do?
He hasn't heard of anyone beating this infection. But that doesn't mean no one ever will. There's always a chance for a breakthrough, for a wild card.
Look at me—I should be infected but I'm not. Maybe that means something. But how to find out?
Abe. Abe knows everything.
He releases Gia and looks her in the eye. "It's not over."
"What do you mean?"
"When I was talking to Abe yesterday he mentioned something about a new breakthrough."
"The days of breakthroughs are gone," she says dully.
"Gia, if there's anything in the pipeline, anything at all, Abe will have a line on it. I'll call him right now."
He grabs the cell phone and punches in Abe's number, something in the past he never would have considered doing, but a lot has changed in five months. He waits through a dozen rings—Abe doesn't believe in answering machines—then tries again. Still no answer. Abe's always in this time of day. Maybe he's in one of his black, ignore-the-phone moods. He's been having more of those lately.
"Looks like I'm going to have to go see him," Jack says. He doesn't want to leave Gia but time is critical. The fact that they've just turned positive means she and Vicky are in the early stages. If something can be done, the sooner the better. "I won't be gone long. You'll be okay?"
Gia nods wordlessly.
"Gia," he says, taking her by the shoulders, "we're going to beat this." And he knows he sounds like a hack actor in a bad soap opera but he can't stand seeing her like this. He's got to give her some hope. "Have I ever let you down?"
"Jack…" she says, and she sounds so tired. "This is different. This isn't something your methods can fix. The best scientific minds in the world have tackled this and they've all come up empty. Every time they think they have a solution, like the vaccine, the virus mutates. So what can you do?"
And when she puts it like that, what can he say? No reason to think he can offer Gia and Vicky a chance when the big
brains can't. But still he's undeterred.
"Maybe I suffer from terminal hubris. And maybe I can't stand by and just let this happen. I've got to do something."
He doesn't say that guilt has pretty much taken him over. He brought Gia and Vicky here to protect them, but the bug got to them anyway. So even if it's not his fault, he feels responsible.
"Then do it," Gia says, without a hint of enthusiasm, "but don't expect me to hope, Jack, because as much as I want to, I can't. I'm looking at the end of everything I am and you are and whatever we might have been, and the strangulation of everything Vicky could be."
"We're not through yet."
"Yeah, we are. Our futures end in a few days. If it was death, I could accept that—at least for myself. But this is a living death… and…"
Her voice trails off, and her gaze slips off Jack and settles somewhere in space.
Jack has never seen her like this. What's happened to her indomitable spirit? It's as if the virus has already changed her, reached inside somehow and snuffed out an essential spark.
He holds her in his arms again and kisses her forehead. "Don't write us off. I'm going over to Abe's and see what he knows." He releases her and backs toward the door. "I should be back in an hour or so. I'll call if I'm going to be any later. Okay?"
Gia nods absently. "I'll be here. Where else can I go?"
Jack turns at the door and sees her standing in the middle of his front room, looking like a lost soul. And that's so un-Gia he has second thoughts about leaving. But he's got to see Abe. If there's any cause for hope, Abe will know.
Free of the cart this trip, Jack makes good time through the empty streets toward Amsterdam Avenue, not sure if he is fleeing the dark reality of his apartment or running toward a ray of hope. Soon he is standing before the Isher Sports Shop. The lights are on inside but the front door is locked. That's not right. He bangs on the glass but Abe doesn't appear.
Worried now—for years Abe has been a heart attack waiting to happen—Jack pulls out the defunct Visa card he keeps in his wallet for moments like this. Looks up and down the street, sees no one near enough to matter, and uses it to slip the door's latch. Abe's never devoted much effort to protecting his street-level stock, but it would take a Sherman tank to get into his basement.
"Abe?" he calls as he steps inside, relocking the door behind him. "Abe, it's Jack. You here?"
Silence… and then high-pitched cheeping as something pale blue flutters overhead. Parabellum, Abe's parakeet. Abe always cages the bird when he leaves, so he must be here.
Jack's apprehension intensifies as he heads for the rear, toward the counter where he and Abe have spent so many hours talking, solving the problems of the world time and again. And then as he rounds a corner piled high with hockey sticks and the counter hoves into view, he stumbles to a halt at the sight of all the red—the counter puddled with it, the wall behind splattered.
"No," Jack whispers.
Gut in a knot, he forces himself forward. Not Abe. Can't be Abe.
But who else's blood can this be?
He creeps toward the counter, edges around the side, looks behind—
It's Abe, on his back, white shirt glistening crimson, head cocked at a crazy angle, throat a ragged hole, torn away by a blast from the sawed-off shotgun lying by his knees.
Jack spins away, doubles over, sick. He doesn't vomit but wishes he could. Rage steadies him. Who did this? Whoever tried to make this look like a suicide didn't know Abe, because Abe would never…
After a while Jack straightens, staggers to the back of the store, finds an old tarp, and drapes it over Abe's body.
The blood… still so wet… couldn't have happened more than twenty, thirty minutes ago.
If only I'd left a few minutes earlier I might have been here in time to…
And then he sees something on the far corner of the counter. The square of a virus test kit. He steps closer. A used kit… and the blue halo says it's positive.
Jack sags against the counter. "Aw, Abe."
And he understands: Abe saw no hope for himself. That means Jack will have none to offer Gia and Vicky.
He sits a long while, feeling lost and paralyzed as he stares at the test card. Finally he pushes himself into motion. Can't leave Abe here like this. What's he do? Call the cops? Will they even come? And if they do, there'll be an investigation and someone will find the armory in the basement. And all the while Abe's body will molder in a drawer in the morgue's cooler.
No. Can't have that. Jack knows what he has to do: come back tonight with the car and take Abe's body to Central Park. No cops, no inquests, just a quiet private burial for his oldest and dearest friend.
But what about Abe's family? The only family Jack knows of is a daughter in Queens. Sarah. Jack's never met her; he hid Gia and Vicky at her place during the rakoshi mess last summer, but she was out of town then.
Jack reaches for the blood-spattered Rolodex and flips through it. Abe used a computer down in the basement but stuck to old-fashioned methods up here on the main floor. An ache grows in his throat at the sight of Abe's crabbed handwriting and for a moment the letters blur. He blinks and tugs on the "S" tab, and there it is: simply "Sarah" and a number.
He calls the number and when a woman answers he asks for Sarah.
"This is she."
"I… I'm a friend of your father's. I'm afraid—"
"Yes, we know," she says. "He's dead."
Jack's alarms go off at the we. "How can you—?"
"We were hoping to get him to the point where we could stop him from such tragic foolishness, but those damn tests are so—"
Jack slams down the receiver. He can imagine how it went down. Sarah stops by with a peace offering. They've never gotten along, but these are extraordinary times and maybe they should bury the hatchet. She's brought something sweet, something her father can't resist, something heavily spiked with the virus.
And later, when Abe's blood turns positive, he knows he's a goner and knows who made him that way and it's all too much for him. Never would have believed it of Abe, but no telling what a person will do when the whole future goes dead black without a single glint of hope—
Jack's breath freezes in his chest as he remembers Gia's ten-mile stare when he left her and now he's heading for the door with his heart tearing loose. The phone rings and he knows he should ignore it but doubles back on the slim chance it might be Gia. She knows he's here, maybe she's trying to reach him.
"Jack," Gia says in response to his barked hello. "Thank God I caught you."
"What's wrong?" The preternatural calm of her tone sends screams of warning through him. "How's Vicky?"
"Sleeping."
"Sleeping?" Vicky is not a napper. "Is she sick?"
"Not anymore. She's at peace."
"Christ, Gia, what are you saying? Don't tell me you—"
"I didn't have enough sleeping pills for both of us, so I gave them all to her. Soon she'll be safe."
"No!"
"And I've got one of your guns for me, but I didn't want to use it until I called you to say good-bye—"
The phone slips from Jack's fingers and he's dashing for the door, bursting onto the sidewalk, and sprinting east when he glances up and skids to a halt at the sight of a giant face staring down at him. It's the Russian lady but she's grown to Godzilla proportions.
"NOW DO YOU SEE?" she cries, her booming voice echoing off the buildings. "NOW DO YOU UNDERSTAND? THIS WILL BE IF YOU DO NOT STOP VIRUS NOW!"
What does it mean? That this is all a dream? No. Much as Jack wishes it were true, he knows it's not. This is too real.
Averting his face from her giant, blazing eyes, he starts running again, down the center of a treadmill street with cardboard buildings sliding by on each side to give the illusion of forward progress, but he's getting nowhere, and no matter how much speed he pumps into his legs, no matter how he cries and screams at the top of his lungs, he's no closer to home than when he started…<
br />
13
"Kevin's being a real dickhead about it, Mom."
"Elizabeth Iverson, that is no way to talk about your brother. And where did you pick up that kind of language?"
"I can't help it, that's what he is. And I don't care if he comes. Who wants him around anyway."
Kate clung to her cell phone as she peeked into Jack's bedroom—he was still tossing this way and that under the covers—then returned her attention to Lizzie. With everything that had happened, she'd missed her morning call to the kids. Just as well; they both slept in on Saturdays. She'd waited till after dinner to check in.
All she'd wanted to do was touch base with them before they went out with their friends, but had wound up in the middle of a sibling contretemps. She should have seen it coming, but this was the last thing she needed now: Kevin was refusing to go to Lizzie's recital on Monday. Lizzie was acting tough but Kate could tell she was hurt. Ron had never been good dealing with arguments between the kids so, exhausted though she was, Kate had been designated referee.
She sighed. "Put him on."
"I said, I don't care!"
"Lizzie, please put your brother on."
A few seconds of muffled sounds, then a sullen, "S'up, Ma?" from Kevin.
"What's up yourself, Kevin? Have you got something better to do Monday night?"
"Aw, Mom, I hate that music, you know that."
"No, it's not Polio, I'll grant you that," she said, referring to her son's favorite band, perpetrators of cacophonies he referred to as "slash metal" or "thrash metal" or some such unlistenable noise. She realized that every generation needed music that rawed their parents' nerves, but please. "The music's not the issue, however. Your sister's feelings are."
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