by Dayo Benson
“You won’t believe the dress I bought today. It’s hot.”
“Is it?” Carl asked absent-mindedly.
“Yeah. Its soft pink chiffon with a corset bodice and layers at the bottom. Little crystals at the top, strapless…” I wondered why I was blabbing. Carl wasn’t even listening. I went to hang the dress in my closet. I hadn’t bought any shoes, but I knew I had at least a dozen pairs of pink shoes. I’d have to go to my mom’s and get them. I decided to do that immediately.
“Where are you going?” Carl asked when I walked through the den toward the front door.
“To my mom’s. I need to get some shoes.”
“Can’t you get them on Monday?”
“We’re moving to our new house on Monday, remember?”
“Okay, I’ll take you.” Carl stood up and took his car keys out of his pocket.
“I can take myself.”
“If you’re really only going to your mom’s, why don’t you want me take you?” Carl asked suspiciously.
I narrowed my eyes, but caught myself before I said anything. The wedding was only a week away, and I didn’t want any bruises. “Let’s go then,” I said.
***
On Monday morning, I was doing some last minute packing when a sudden dizziness took over me. I placed a steadying hand on the closet from which I was removing the remainder of my clothes.
“Are you okay?” Carl asked. “You look really weird.”
“I’m fine.” I let go of the closet and continued packing. Soon, I was breathless and panting. I sat on the bed wondering what was wrong with me.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Carl asked again.
I nodded. The next thing I knew everything went black. When I woke up, Carl was shaking me while talking into his cell phone. “Look, my wife just passed out, and I want an ambulance. I don’t know what caused it, but when you get here, maybe you can tell me,” he barked. He gave our address and then hung up.
I sat up, slightly disorientated.
“Are you okay, Lexi?”
“Yeah.”
“You just fainted.”
I rubbed my eyes. I felt so weak. When the ambulance arrived, I was taken to hospital. We waited for forty-five minutes before I was seen. The doctor checked me over and said everything looked normal.
“Well, she fainted. That isn’t normal,” Carl pointed out.
“If you faint again or still feel unwell over the next few days, come back, and we’ll check you again,” the doctor told me. “You could be anemic.”
“Okay.” I picked up my purse. What a waste of time.
“Alternatively, have you taken a pregnancy test?” the doctor asked.
“No.”
“Well, you might want to do that.”
Something inside me constricted. I couldn’t be pregnant again! This was so déjà vu.
I made Carl stop over at a grocery store on our way home. I bought a pregnancy test and went to the bathroom as soon as we got home. The test confirmed the doctor’s suspicions. I couldn’t believe I was going through this again. I wept alone in the bathroom, wondering what I was going to do, wondering how Carl would react, wondering whose baby it was. I had to know how far pregnant I was before I’d be able to work it out.
I wiped my eyes and went to meet Carl in the bedroom.
“So are you pregnant?” he asked.
I nodded, not looking at him, and he didn’t say anything.
As we finished packing our things, I realized that although I considered my pregnancy bad news, I wanted to keep it this time.
A couple of Carl’s friends arrived to help us move our things. I sat in the den while they loaded up their cars. When we got to our new house, I went straight to mine and Carl’s new bedroom and lay down.
Carl and the guys brought all our stuff into the house, then the guys left. A few minutes later, I heard Carl leaving too. Only God knew what he was thinking. He’d probably gone to drink himself crazy.
He returned a few minutes later and came upstairs with a bottle of water and a paper pharmacy bag. “I bought you some special pregnancy drugs. You need folic acid in these early stages.”
“Thanks.” I swallowed the tablets and lay back down.
“So, is it mine this time?” Carl asked. I sensed a hint of resignation in his tone.
“Of course, it’s yours,” I said with more assurance than I felt. “You never let me out of your sight, so it can’t really be anybody else’s, can it? I can’t get pregnant by telepathy!”
Carl sighed. “I don’t want any stories about miscarriages or the like this time, okay?”
I turned over, away from his gaze.
Chapter 61
On Friday morning, the day before Matt and Michelle’s wedding, I went to my mom’s beauty consultancy and had my roots done and some highlights put in. I was still blond, and I was planning to stay that way for a while. I didn’t tell my mom that I was pregnant. I wanted to choose the right moment.
When I got home, I stood sideways and looked at myself in the mirror in the hallway. My stomach was still as flat as ever. From my calculations, I was about ten weeks pregnant. Shouldn’t I have a bump yet?
I went to the kitchen to fix a snack and saw the housekeeper that Carl had hired against my wishes. Her name was Louise, and she was pretty old. I wondered whether she would feel insulted if I started cooking while she was cleaning up. I smiled at her and took a bottle of water out of the fridge. This whole housekeeper thing was so weird.
“What would you like for lunch?” Louise asked.
“Actually, I was thinking I would cook myself today and let you go home early.”
Louise wouldn’t hear of it. She shooed me out of the kitchen, muttering about how the bedroom was the place for pregnant women not the kitchen and that I should go lie down.
I went to the den, wondering where Carl was. Maybe he’d gone to buy a suit for the wedding. He’d been talking about going shopping, but I knew he’d leave it until last minute.
***
Carl waited downstairs while I finished getting ready for Matt and Michelle’s wedding. I smiled at my reflection in the mirror as I put on my earrings. I was going to forget all my problems, namely my pathetic marriage and unwanted pregnancy, just for today. I could start worrying about whether my baby would look like Carl, Dan, or Professor Jackson, or whether it would be a hybrid of the three of them, after the wedding.
I thought of Jace as I contemplated which perfume to wear. I had been sure I would never get over him. Had I gotten over him? I would have to see him to know.
Carl’s jaw dropped when I went downstairs to meet him. “Okay,” he said slowly, a slight frown furrowing his brow. “How come you never dress up like that for me?”
“You never take me anywhere?”
“How come you always cover up that cleavage?”
I rolled my eyes.
Carl nodded his approval. “You always look gorgeous, but today you look crazy gorgeous.”
“Thanks, let’s go.”
It was already quarter to one. It was a good thing that we knew the way to the church.
When we got to the church, it had been decorated, and it looked so different from the time when I’d come for youth group. I looked around for a familiar face, but there were too many people. I couldn’t see anybody I recognized. We were late, but the ceremony hadn’t started yet. Eventually, it started twenty minutes late.
A hush fell over the hall as the organist struck up the chords for the wedding march, and everyone looked toward the back of the hall to see the bride. I smiled when I saw Michelle. She was radiant in a flowing white gown and a beautiful veil. She was simply breath-taking.
I cried throughout the ceremony. I was so jealous. What had possessed me to have such a small, low-key wedding? I had always wanted a big wedding, just like this.
Matt looked great too in a white suit. The highlight of the ceremony was the vows. They did the traditional vows, and then they each read their
own made up vows to each other. While Michelle was reading her vows, Matt must have started crying because she removed a packet of tissues from her bosom and handed them to him while the audience chuckled.
The reception was held at the Glacier hotel on the waterfront. I expected the hotel to be all that, but I was still surprised by the grandeur of it when we got there. We were given the seating arrangement, and I was glad to see that I was on a table with Monica. Jace’s name was next to Monica’s.
I jumped when someone grabbed me from behind and hugged me. I could smell Agent Provocateur’s Allure Sensuelle. “Monica,” I guessed, turning round.
Monica beamed at me. “How did you know?” She pulled me into another hug.
“You haven’t changed your perfume, and only you wear that much.” I pulled back from her and laughed. “It hovers around you like a cloud. I can almost see a mist.”
Monica grinned. “Oh, girl, it’s so good to see you.” She looked me from head to toe and raised her eyebrows. “Wow! When I saw that dress, I knew it had to be you. It couldn’t be anyone else.”
“You look great too, Monica.” She was wearing a pale peach taffeta dress and looked gorgeous as always. Her hair was piled on her head and a few stray curls dangled around her face. “How’s med school?”
“Let’s not talk about med school.” Monica’s huge chocolate eyes darkened. “It’s tough. Everyone is smart, and it makes me feel so dumb. I just hope I’ve done well in my exams. I’ve prayed too much about it not to.” Monica looked at Carl, who was still standing behind me. “Oh, hi, Carl.” She turned back to me. “I’ve missed you so much. We have a lot of catching up to do, and I mean a lot. We’re sitting together anyway so we can talk.” She looked over my shoulder. “Oh, there’s Jace,” she announced.
My heartbeat went into overdrive. I didn’t dare turn around. He came over, and I smiled at him. To say he looked gorgeous was an understatement.
Jace gave a low whistle. “Whoa, Lexi, are you trying to kill us?” He pulled me into a hug and kissed my cheek. “It’s been so long—too long. How’ve you been?”
“I’ve been good,” I replied.
“Lexi!” Sandy Hutton screamed, pushing through the crowd to get to us.
“Sandy! Wow you look great!”
“I thought my dress was going to be the best,” she snapped playfully.
“Too bad,” Monica said.
“Hi, Carl,” Sandy said, and I was reminded of his presence behind me. I looked back at him and smiled. He put an arm around my shoulder.
“How’s college?” I asked Jace. “By the way, what are you studying?”
“Business management and finance. I want to be able to actually understand what’s going on with our hotels. I’m planning to take over the finance team.”
“Cool,” I said. “By the way, I had no idea your hotels were this good. This is my first time.”
“Wait a minute. Don’t tell me you and Carl are still together,” Sandy interrupted, looking at the arm Carl had around my shoulder.
“We are,” Carl said. He took my hand and held it up to show them my wedding ring. Everyone stared at it in silence.
Jace recovered first. “You’re married?” he asked me. I nodded. “To Carl?” he asked.
“Yeah,” Carl answered.
“When?”
“Just before Easter,” Carl said.
Sandy looked indignant. “And how come none of us got an invitation?”
“It was just a small wedding,” I said uncomfortably.
Just then Tanya came over. “Lexi,” she cried. “It’s only been a year, but it seems like longer than that.”
We hugged, and she smiled at my dress but made no comment. She now had a bob with bangs that fell over her eyes. “Love the new look.”
“Thanks. Let me introduce you to my fiancé.” Tanya grabbed a nearby guy by the arm. “This is Spencer Caldwell. We met in college.” Tanya looked up at Spencer who was extremely tall and towered above her. “This is Lexi, my friend from high school.” We shook hands.
“Lexi and Carl are married now,” Monica told Tanya.
Tanya’s eyes widened, and she looked at me for confirmation. “Since when?”
“Since March,” I supplied. I showed her my ring.
“Wow, I need sunglasses,” Tanya joked. “So how’s married life?”
I decided to let Carl answer that question. “It’s great,” he said. “We couldn’t be happier. Every day I wake up and see her, I feel like I’ve won the lottery.”
“Excuse me. I’m supposed to be an usher,” Jace said. “I’ll talk to you guys later.” He walked away, and everyone was quiet for a moment.
Tanya grinned. “That’s so sweet, Carl. Did you hear that Spencer? I want you to say things like that when we’re married.”
I watched Jace as he walked away.
“Where did you go for your honeymoon?” Monica asked.
“Mykonos and London,” Carl answered.
Just then some of the guys from our high school football team came, and Carl moved away with them.
“Sandy, aren’t you supposed to be helping Michelle change into her second dress?” Monica asked, and Sandy nodded.
“Better run. I’ll see you guys later.” She hurried away.
“Me and Spencer are going to sit at our table now, but I hope we can talk later before you leave,” Tanya said to me.
I nodded, and then followed Monica as she took me by the hand and started walking quickly toward the exit. “Where are we going?”
“Outside.”
We pushed our way through the crowd until we got outside. Monica led me round to the back of the hotel into the gardens, and she sat down on the low wall that ran around it. I remained standing because I didn’t want to ruin my dress.
“Lexi Dixon, what are we going to do with you?” she said with a sigh.
“You mean Lexi Layton.”
“Why did you marry him?”
I frowned. “What kind of question is that? I married him for the same reasons anyone marries anyone else,” I said defensively.
“Last time we spoke, you were talking about going to Hawaii with Dan Black.”
“People change. Feelings change.”
“I’m just confused. I really can’t believe it.”
“Why?”
“Because you’ve never seemed to really like Carl. Even in high school, it was Jace you liked not Carl. Remember how far you went to try and get Jace back?”
I winced. “Don’t remind me.”
“Well, I saw the way you were looking at him before when he walked away. Carl saw too by the way. He was real jealous when I was his date for that disco.”
“Thanks for reminding me that you dated my husband.”
“You know I don’t mean it like that,” Monica said unapologetically. “I don’t know what possessed you to marry him. Has he changed or something?”
“Not really.”
“Then what happened?”
“Nothing happened. We just decided to get married.”
“And you didn’t invite me.” Monica scowled. “I don’t care if it was a small wedding; I’m supposed to be your best friend.”
“Oh, yeah, a best friend who I haven’t spoken to in months, who wasn’t really speaking to me, even before we left high school.”
Monica gave me a hurt glare. “I wanted to speak to you, but you cut me off when I became a Christian.”
“No, you cut me off and started hanging out with all your religious friends.”
“No,” Monica said. “I still wanted to talk to you, but you thought I was dating Jace.”
“Whatever,” I said giving up.
A gentle breeze played with Monica’s curls, and they danced around her face. She shook them out of her eyes and looked up at me, shielding her eyes from the sun with her hand. “So who’s your best friend now?”
“Dr. Paula.”
“Why does that name sound familiar?”
I smiled b
itterly. “She’s that psychotherapist we went to when you were depressed.”
“Oh, don’t remind me about that time. Do you see her?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“Because of my dad.” Well, that was part of it. “I haven’t been for a while though. I’m fed up of talking about my problems. I want a solution not an agony aunt.”
“Jesus is the solution.”
“Maybe,” I said wistfully.
Monica looked surprised. “Oh, so I’m allowed to say that now? Because in high school, you bit my head off every time I tried to talk to you about God.”
I looked around at the hotel gardens wondering how big it was. It was so beautiful.
“So, how are things?” Monica asked.
“Great. I kind of believe in God now. I guess you’ll be happy to hear that.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I met a Christian girl at college. She’s been telling me stuff about God.”
Monica raised her eyebrows. “Cool. I actually prayed that God would send someone to speak to you.”
“I nearly became a Christian a few months ago.” I didn’t know why I was telling Monica this. The words were just spilling out of my mouth.
“Well, why didn’t you?”
That was the time Carl brought a girl home. “I don’t know. I’m not completely sure about it yet.”
“What aren’t you sure about?”
“Dunno. Maybe I’m just not really ready. I think I just wanted a quick fix for my issues.”
“Christianity is more than a quick fix.”
“I’ll bear that in mind.” I didn’t want to start some big deep conversation about religion right now.
Monica seemed to sense that. She twirled a curl around her finger and looked around. “What do you think of Jace’s hotel?”
“It’s great. Has Jace got a girlfriend?”
“Not that I know of.”
“I don’t get why he walked off like that before.”
She didn’t say anything.
“Have you got a boyfriend?” I asked her. She shook her head. “Why not?”
“The whole dating game just seems so superficial to me. I want the real deal. Until then, I’ll just keep myself to myself.”