Table of Contents
Prologue
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nineteen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
About the Author
Other Books by Cheryl Douglas
Coming Soon
Kara
Book Four in the Starkis Family Series
Cheryl Douglas
Copyright © by Cheryl Douglas
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, including photocopying, graphic, electronic, mechanical, taping, recording, sharing, or by any information retrieval system without the express written permission of the author and / or publisher. Exceptions include brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Persons, places and other entities represented in this book are deemed to be fictitious. They are not intended to represent actual places or entities currently or previously in existence or any person living or dead. This work is the product of the author’s imagination.
Any and all inquiries to the author of this book should be directed to: [email protected]
Kara © 2015 Cheryl Douglas
Kara
Kara Starkis is no stranger to stupid mistakes. At twenty-one she walked away from her fiancée days before their wedding and has regretted it every day since. A weekend of fun in the sun with Dustin leaves her with more questions than answers. But she needs to know… can he ever trust her again?
Dustin Matthews tried to forget Kara. He’s even tried hating her. But seeing her again reminds him how much he loved her. He never planned to let her back in his life, but now that he has, he’s not sure if he can move on without her.
But when Kara drops a bombshell that could change everything, can Dustin figure out how to forgive or will he choose to forget her?
Prologue
“Dustin, I love you, but I can’t marry you.”
I heard the words, but I couldn’t believe them. This had to be a joke. The woman I’d built my life around couldn’t marry me? This was a nightmare. I was going to wake up. I had to wake up because this couldn’t be happening. Not to me. Not to us.
“What the hell are you talking about?” I tried to stay calm, but I felt panic wash over me as my rage built. “Our wedding is in three days! Three goddamn days! We have family and friends flying in from all over the world for this!”
“I know.” The tears that had been building in her eyes trickled slowly down her face until she brushed them away. “I’m sorry, I just—”
“You’re sorry?” Waves crashed against our legs, but I barely noticed. Nothing could cool my raging temper now. She was sorry? Was she serious? She’d just torn out my heart and stomped on it, and she was trying to tell me she was sorry. “That’s supposed to make me feel better?”
She would be sorry eventually. When she realized she’d made the biggest mistake of her life not marrying me. We were soul mates; I knew it. I felt it every time I looked at her, and the fact that she apparently didn’t feel the same way was crushing me. My pride told me to get the hell out of there, not to even listen to her pathetic excuses, but my heart, which had been in love with this woman for years, wanted to stay. To try to convince her that she was making a huge mistake, that we belonged together and couldn’t find happiness with anyone else.
God, the thought of being with anyone else, or worse, seeing her with someone else, was the final blow. I couldn’t take it anymore. I had to get out of there. To get as far away as possible from the place and person I loved.
“I know nothing I say or do can make this better,” she said softly, reaching out to touch my arm.
“Don’t touch me!” I shouted, pulling back. “You’re right. Nothing you say can make this better. Just tell me one thing.” Because no matter how much it hurt, I had to know. “Why?”
“We’re still so young, Dustin. I don’t feel like I’m ready to—”
“Then why the hell did you accept my proposal?” Right here on this beach we loved, just a couple of months ago, I’d produced the ring I painstakingly selected for her, and she’d cried before throwing her arms around me and telling me how much she loved me. Had she been lying? Had our entire relationship been a lie? A joke on me? It sure as hell felt like that.
“Because I wanted to marry you.” She shook her head. “It’s just that it’s all happening so fast. I didn’t know you’d want to get married right away or—”
“Don’t tell me you didn’t have a say in any of this, Kara. If you didn’t want this, you could have said something.”
She crossed her arms. “Really? Because I kind of felt like my opinion didn’t matter. Once our parents and the wedding planner got involved, I didn’t feel like I had a say anymore. You didn’t even ask me if I wanted to move back to Raleigh with you. You just assumed I would.”
“That’s where I’ve been busting my ass to build my business and make a name for myself. Now that you’re finished with school, you don’t have any other commitments. Why wouldn’t you want to move to my hometown to be with me?”
She turned away, and I knew she could never give me an answer that would satisfy me. It didn’t matter how many excuses she offered or how much she tried to justify her actions—bottom line, it was over. She didn’t want to marry me.
“You’ll regret this,” I swore. “But when you do, don’t come crawling back to me, begging for forgiveness, ‘cause it’ll never happen.” I felt like I was spewing hate, a foreign emotion in relation to her. “I don’t want to see your face or hear your voice again. Do you understand me?”
She turned slowly, shaking her head. “Don’t do this. Please, just—”
“I’m not the one doing this,” I said, pointing at her. “You are! You did this. If you wanna blame someone, blame yourself!”
I stalked up the beach, intent on getting as far away from her as I could. I heard her cry out my name, but nothing could stop me. Not now that I knew the truth. She didn’t want to be my wife.
***
Kara
I’d known it would hurt, but nothing could have prepared me for his reaction. The man I loved hated me, and I couldn’t say I blamed him. If I were him, I would have hated me too. I shouldn’t have waited so long to tell him.
When he’d wanted to push up the wedding date, I should have told him that I wanted to return to school in the fall, that I wanted a long engagement… that I needed a little more time before I became his wife. But now I’d never have a chance to say those things. He was gone, and I knew Dustin well enough to know he wouldn’t come back until he was sure he wouldn’t have to see me again.
“Hey.” My sister Catia sat beside me in the sand. “I heard Dustin peel out of here. I’m taking it things didn’t go well?”
I laughed through my tears before dropping my head into the alcove created by my folded arms resting on my knees. “No, things didn’t go well. He hates me, Cat. Dustin hates me.” I was sobbing uncontrollably.
Cat put her arm around my shoulders, drawing me close as she tried to calm me. “He doesn’t hate you, honey. He could never hate you.”
“He said he never wants to see me again.” I squeezed my eyes shut, but nothing would stop the flow of tears.
“Trust me, he hates me.”
“Did you try to tell him that you just needed a little more time? That you didn’t want to cancel the wedding, just postpone it for a while?”
I wondered if throwing the word postpone in would have made a difference? He still wouldn’t have been happy, but maybe he wouldn’t have been quite so hostile. “I didn’t get a chance. He just went off on me.”
“He’ll calm down,” Cat assured me. “He just needs some time to come to terms with the fact you won’t be getting married in a few days as planned. When he realizes that he still loves you and you still love him, he’ll reach out to you.”
“What if he doesn’t?” My biggest fear was that I’d never see or hear from him again. I’d never have a chance to tell him that I’d never wanted anything more than I wanted him.
“Then you’ll call him.”
“Didn’t you hear what I said?” I felt too emotionally drained to go back and forth with my sister, but she wouldn’t stop until she was satisfied she’d made me feel better. But nothing short of Dustin coming back so we could talk this out and revise our plans would have made me feel better. “He said he doesn’t want to see or hear from me again. If I tried to call, he would just hang up on me.”
“So you’ll go see him. He may not have to come back here for a while, but nothing’s stopping you from hopping on a plane and going to Raleigh. Just give it a few weeks. When he realizes he doesn’t want to live without you, he’ll be willing to listen to reason.”
I shook my head, knowing my opportunity to state my case had left when he did. “If I showed up at his door, he’d only slam it in my face.” That would have been even more painful than watching him walk away. I couldn’t do it. I wouldn’t do it. This was my mess to clean up, but Dustin hadn’t given me that option.
The only option I had now was to pray every day that he would reach out to me. If he didn’t… I couldn’t let myself consider that. He had to.
Chapter One
Kara
I was sitting on the wraparound deck, enjoying the beautiful view, when I heard a woman’s laughter coming from next door. I froze. I’d only come to our parents’ summer home in the Hamptons because Catia had sworn to me he wouldn’t be here.
“Sssh,” Catia said, raising one finger to her lips.
I didn’t want to hear what they were saying or doing. Especially if they were… I couldn’t let myself go there. I’d been engaged to Dustin once. The thought of him making love to another woman, even if she was his fiancée, was abhorrent.
“Dustin, stop!”
A stunning redhead ran onto the deck next door. Even though the houses were a few hundred feet apart, I knew it was her. I’d have known her anywhere. Though we’d never met, she was the woman living the life I should have had with the man I’d been stupid enough to let go.
He captured her in his arms, burying his face in her neck.
I couldn’t breathe as I watched them. The pain in my chest was too sharp. My stomach lurched, threatening to expel the cream-cheese-and-lox bagels we’d had for breakfast.
“I’m so sorry,” Catia mouthed, her face as pale as I suspected mine was as we watched them, stunned and appalled yet unable to look away.
Catia had said Dustin had tweeted he was taking his beautiful fiancée to the Bahamas for a little fun in the sun, so she’d thought we would be safe to use our house next door to his family’s vacation home. Apparently they’d changed their plans though, and it was too late to escape, to pretend I hadn’t seen them or that their little public display of affection wasn’t tearing out my heart.
It had been almost eight years since I ended our engagement. I knew it shouldn’t hurt so much after all this time, but the heart doesn’t always align with the head. In that moment, my heart still wanted Dustin even though my head told me he was another woman’s man now.
He looked up at the same time I tried to look away, and the shock on his face must have mirrored my own.
He was even sexier now. He was more muscular, and he had a colorful back tattoo that made my mouth water. Those were the things I hadn’t been expecting. The rest I had memorized. From his light hazel eyes to his dark hair and skin, I knew this man. Seeing him was almost as familiar as looking at my own reflection.
“Oh God,” Catia whispered. “He saw us.”
“Of course he saw us. Did you think he wouldn’t?” I knew it wasn’t her fault that he was there, flaunting his lover in my face. It was my fault, but I’d already punished myself enough to last a lifetime, at least according to my sister.
“What should we do?” she asked, removing her floppy hat. “Should we wave?”
“I don’t care.” I turned my head so I was no longer looking in his direction. “Do what you want. It’s not you he hates. If I waved at him, he’d probably flip me off.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” Catia said, slapping my forearm while she waved at him. “He waved back.”
“That’s nice.” I picked up the e-reader I’d abandoned on the ottoman earlier, praying I could feign disinterest for his benefit.
“Oh my God,” Catia said, digging her nails into my arm. “He’s coming this way, and he’s bringing her with him.”
I swallowed convulsively, praying I wouldn’t throw up. “This cannot be happening. I can’t do this.” I sounded slightly hysterical as I reached for my bottled water. “I can’t meet her. I can’t see him. I’ll—”
“Sssh,” Catia warned. “It’s too late. Be quiet, or they’ll hear you.”
Dustin walked down the stone path and climbed the stairs before unlatching our gate. I’d watched him cross that yard a hundred times, but the sight had never made me want to cry before.
“Hey, ladies,” he said, smiling at Catia. “I didn’t know you’d be here. It’s been a long time.”
“It sure has,” Catia said, standing. “It’s wonderful to see you, Dustin.”
He took her hand before leaning in to kiss her cheek. “You look great, Cat.”
I died a little inside watching him reconnect with my sister. They’d always been close, and I knew she’d missed his friendship after we broke up. Yet another casualty of the biggest mistake of my life.
“This is my fiancée, Jana.”
“It’s nice to meet you,” Catia said, accepting Jana’s outstretched hand.
I couldn’t sit there forever, pretending my worst nightmare wasn’t playing out before me, so I stood, pasting on a smile. I prayed he wasn’t as good at reading me as he’d always been because if he was, I was in deep trouble. “Dustin.” I locked eyes with him briefly before I offered my hand to his fiancée. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Jana. I’m Kara, Dustin’s—”
A look of horror passed over his face before he gave me a sharp nod, indicating I should keep my mouth shut.
“Uh, neighbor.” Now I felt like a fool because it was obvious we were his neighbors, but what I’d been planning to say would have been even worse. His ex-fiancée or maybe the woman who dumped him and broke his heart. Ugh. I needed to get the hell out of there.
“It’s so nice to meet you,” Jana said, clasping my hand. “I hope we didn’t disturb you.” She poked Dustin in the ribs. “I’m painfully ticklish, and he exploits it every chance he gets.”
I tried to smile, but I was sure it looked more like I’d stubbed my toe and was trying to hide the pain because that was exactly what it felt like.
“We were just going to go for a jog,” Jana said, pointing toward the trails. “He was trying to convince me we could get our exercise in other ways, but—”
“Uh, babe, speaking of that jog,” Dustin cut in, “why don’t you hit the trails and I’ll catch up with you in a few? Mrs. Starkis mentioned something about wanting to build an addition, and I promised her I’d have a look next time I was up.”
“Oh, your parents are here?” Jana asked, looking toward the large stone house our family had owned since we were born.
“No,” Catia said, “but my mother fil
led me in on what she wanted, Dustin. I can go over the details with you, if you want?”
He looked relieved. “That’d be great. You don’t mind, do you, honey?”
“No, not at all.” She held up her iPod. “I downloaded some new tunes, so I’m good to go. It was really nice meeting you both.” She smiled at Catia and me.
“You too,” we said in unison.
I waited until Jana was safely down the path before I said, “Well, it was nice seeing you again, Dustin. I’ll let you two discuss those renovation plans.”
“There is no renovation,” he said, sounding frustrated. “I was just trying to buy a little time. What the hell are you doing here?”
“Me?” I asked, straightening to my full height. That would have been more impressive if I’d had heels on. I only stood five three, and he had a full foot on me. “What am I doing here? What are you doing here? I thought you were supposed to be in the Bahamas.”
“How do you know that?” he asked, narrowing his eyes.
“She told me.” I hooked my thumb toward Catia. I knew I would hear about it later for throwing her under the bus, but she owed me for convincing me to come here in the first place.
“I follow you on Twitter,” Catia said, raising her palms. “I thought when you said you were going to the Bahamas for the weekend, it would be safe to come up here. Darius is having a party here this weekend”—she winked—“so he’s inviting all of his hot, single friends. We didn’t want to miss out on all the fun.”
Catia didn’t want to miss out on all the fun. I just wanted to make sure they didn’t trash the place. My brother’s friends could be a rowdy bunch, and my parents would kill me if I let them wreck the house they loved. Even though my siblings and I were the same age, my parents claimed I was the responsible one, tasked with looking out for the other two.
Dustin glared at me. It was obvious that despite the act he’d put on in front of his fiancée, he still harbored a lot of resentment toward me. “Cat, do you mind if I have a word with your sister?”
Kara (Starkis Family #4) Page 1