“Oh God, Tess…” Her mom’s expression took on the horror Tessa had felt at Jonah’s announcement, and she grasped her hand.
“From the hallway.” Tessa squeezed her hand in reassurance. “But Flynn convinced Jonah’s sister that he could take Jonah down for rape with the proof he had.”
“That poor boy.”
That made Tessa smile. “Not exactly poor, Mom.”
“Monetary wealth doesn’t have a thing to do with emotional wealth.”
True. Which made her realize how bankrupt Jonah’s eyes seemed any time he was near her, especially when the conversation edged toward the topic of her sexual assault. “I think it’s painful for him to be around me. Either that or I repel him.”
He wouldn’t be the only man who couldn’t handle her past.
Tessa stared at the box of Christmas lights her dad had hauled out of the attic earlier this morning, and they spun her back to the night of Steele Trap’s holiday party.
After they had sex—hot, amazing, intense sex—on top of his desk, Jonah had pulled away from her and looked at her with the kind of horror that made her blood chill. His expression was a combination of disgust and shame, two emotions Tessa was no stranger to herself.
She’d worked so hard to put them in their proper place after she was raped. Seeing them so clearly displayed on Jonah’s face ripped open a place in her carefully constructed emotional sanctuary.
So she slipped on her underwear and straightened her clothes.
But when Jonah tried to walk out, she grabbed him by the arm and pushed him into the nearest chair. “Talk,” she ordered. “You owe me that.”
How she hated to guilt him like that, but as many times as she’d dreamed of being in this man’s arms, none of them had ended like this, with him looking at her as if she was someone he didn’t know.
“I don’t want to be like them,” he said, his eyes glassy with pain. “They paid, but it wasn’t enough.”
“Like who?” she asked. Surely he couldn’t mean… “Jonah, what just happened here was consensual. You understand that, right?”
“That doesn’t make it okay.” And he walked out.
Tessa blinked, bringing the box of lights and the present back into focus. “He needs me to talk with the authorities to clear him,” she finally said to her mom.
“Is there any reason you wouldn’t?”
Tessa leaned in and rested her head on her mom’s shoulder. “Honestly, I’m afraid I’d do almost anything for that man.”
3
North Carolina
One Year Later
Present Day
Someone had tried to make Tucci’s, a downtown Charlotte restaurant, glimmer with holiday cheer. Fake mistletoe hung from doorways, colorful foil garlands swagged along the walls, and little Santas parachuted from the ceiling.
But for Jonah, it was suddenly too noisy, too hot, too crowded.
Any place where he and Tessa Martin were in the same room was too crowded. Made him feel as if his skin had been tossed in the dryer and shrunk like a wool sweater.
What was she doing here?
He hadn’t seen her in person since the day he’d asked her to help Micki. To help him. After Tessa had called the DA and State’s Attorney to clear his name, he’d told himself that an elaborate floral arrangement and a heartfelt thank-you note was enough.
Now it felt like nothing more than a dick move.
He took a sip of his beer and tried to keep his attention on the circle of people around him. He’d heard a few of his former developers would be in town and figured it was a perfect time to talk with them about a new project he wanted to launch.
“So when are you gonna tell us why you’re plying us with food and booze when we’re supposed to be at some boring conference dinner?”
Jonah flinched, realizing Jimmy Stafford, a Python whiz, had caught him staring at Tessa like a teenager jonesing for a prom date.
He forced himself to look away from her, but his brain was still mulling over her appearance. She was wearing snug black pants, heels that could fuel a thousand fantasies, and a silky red shirt. He caught himself rubbing his fingers together as if he could feel the texture of the fabric, so he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans and pretended he’d simply been glancing around.
At the bar, a dude with a martini in front of him was staring intently at someone. Jonah followed his line of sight directly back to Tessa. The guy’s scrutiny made the hair on the back of Jonah’s neck quiver. Then he looked down at his drink, and Jonah relaxed. Just a man looking at a beautiful woman.
He blinked, remembering Stafford had asked him a question, but instead of answering it, he asked, “What’s Tessa doing here?”
Keith Benery, a self-taught young developer he’d hired at Steele Trap, was standing on the opposite side of the tall cocktail table. “Aw, shit. I didn’t realize this was a private thing. Figured you were fine with anyone from Steele Trap coming, and she was going to be around, so—”
“Not a problem.” It wasn’t, because he wouldn’t let it be.
Tonight was about making strides to shed his recent reputation as the bored Baby Billionaire. Baby Fucking Billionaire. His brothers had given him the nickname with a sort of twisted affection, but it still rubbed.
After he’d saved his hometown from the brink of bankruptcy, people had acted as if he was some kind of savior. A hero. But he wasn’t.
Any idiot with a bank account could throw money around. And since he’d built his big cedar-and-glass house on the ridge, people had started to idolize him even more.
If only they knew they were wasting their time looking up to a man who didn’t deserve their admiration.
“I wanted to feel you out about working on a side hustle,” he said to the guys around him.
Keith hooked a thumb in his belt loop and knocked back half his IPA. It always struck Jonah as a little funny seeing the guy drink beer, because with his blond crew cut and freckles, he looked about thirteen.
“Another game like Steele Survivor?” Jimmy asked.
“Nah. Been there, done that.” He could’ve made another game, since the timeline on his noncompete had expired. Steele Survivor was a game he’d first imagined when he was a kid. It was fun, and it had made him a rich man, but at the end of the day, it was just a game.
Now, he wanted to make something that mattered.
Before Jonah could explain his idea for a suite of personal safety apps, Keith turned and called out to the room, “Hey, guys, Steele’s making games again!”
That brought the rest of the coders he’d invited his way, drinks and snacks in hand. They crowded around him and peppered him with questions.
“Another survivor game?”
“What platform are you looking at? Console or iOS?”
Before he could correct Keith’s assumption, a blond waitress hurried toward Jonah with a tray of appetizers. “Can I offer you something?”
By the husky tone in her voice, she wasn’t trying to sell him on the deliciousness of those one-bite pork sliders.
“Thanks, but no…”
She smiled and leaned forward to give him a clear view of what appeared to be 400ccs of silicone. “Are you sure?”
He caught movement over the waitress’s shoulder, and looked up to find Tessa walking toward the group. Crap. She probably thought he’d been ogling the woman’s tits.
Why did she always seem to catch him at his worst?
He wasn’t actually a butt-brained douchebag. At least not all the time.
Tessa touched the waitress on the elbow and nodded to the guys opposite Jonah in the conversation circle. “Those gentlemen were just asking for more sliders.”
The waitress glanced at the other guys, dressed in shirts screen-printed with things like “Zelda is the girl” and “Video games don’t make us violent. Lag does.” Then she looked back at Jonah with disappointment clearly shining in her eyes.
Hell, it wasn’t as if he had anything on
them when it came to dressing like a grownup. His own shirt said “√-1 23 ∑ π… It was delicious.” But his credit card was the one that had been handed over for tonight’s tab. And something about a Barclays Black Card seemed to get women’s attention.
The waitress did a little eyelash flutter at him, then headed toward the other guys, who greeted her and the sliders with a cheer and some juvenile backslaps.
Tessa moved closer, teasing Jonah with her scent. While the others momentarily gave the waitress and the food their full attention, Tessa sipped her wine and smiled over the rim of her glass. “It was nice of you to host this get-together. Are we celebrating something?”
“No, just catching up.” He didn’t want to tell her about his app ideas because they’d been inspired by her. By what had happened to her.
Something no one should have to endure.
If a person ever felt threatened, he or she should be able to quickly and covertly communicate with a small circle of people they trusted. People who could help them out of a dicey situation. The uses for an app like that could be widespread, but he wanted to roll it out to domestic violence and sexual assault victims first.
He shrugged and tried to avoid Tessa’s scrutiny. Whenever she looked at him like that, as if she could clearly read all his thoughts, he didn’t know whether to feel psychoanalyzed or turned on. “Heard a few people were in town, so…”
“Jonah, look at me.”
“What? I am looking at you.”
“No,” she said, laying her soft hand on his scruffy cheek and almost stopping his heart, “you’re staring at my left ear.”
He couldn’t help but let a small smile break through, because she was right. “You have nice ears.”
Crazy thing was, his statement was true. Decorated with classic pearl earrings, Tessa’s ears were dainty and perfectly curved. Sexy.
Sexy ears. This was what happened when he didn’t have enough to keep him busy—he got juiced up looking at a woman’s earlobes.
Her hand skimmed down his face, and she let it fall away. Even while surrounded by people, the loss made him feel alone. Hell, if it weren’t for Tessa, he could be sitting alone in a jail cell.
“Thank you,” he blurted out.
“For?”
“For clearing me,” he said, turning more fully toward her to ensure others didn’t hear.
“All I did was tell the truth.”
“You made it possible for my sister to live the life she wants instead of the one she was forced into.”
“And you? Are you living the life you want?”
“Please don’t try to play shrink with me. I don’t need you crawling around in my head.” And fuck-all if that didn’t make him think about her crawling into his bed.
Tessa simply took another sip of her wine and slowly placed her glass next to his, allowing her knuckles to brush his. “You’re right. I’m not your therapist. I’m not your priest. I’m just a friend.” With a sad smile, she reached up and smoothed his hair out of his eyes. “And a friend knows when another friend is feeling a little lost.”
Hell, in one way or another, he’d been stumbling around in the woods since he was seventeen. Since the night he’d failed Tessa.
Something he’d been trying to make up for ever since.
He wanted to drop to his knees and ask her to forgive him. He also wanted to drop to his knees and—
“So, Steele, what’s this new project of yours?”
Good. Saved from his own imagination.
Suddenly, a weird feeling crawled up the back of Jonah’s neck, and he glanced toward the bar to find the same guy who’d been scoping out Tessa staring at him.
“I’ve kept all of you away from your conference for long enough,” Jonah told the developers. “Tell you what, I’ll set up a video call next week with anyone who wants to hear more.”
The man at the bar struck Jonah as familiar, but he couldn’t place him. Maybe the dude was a Steele Survivor fan. That happened every so often. Someone recognized him from a picture on the Internet or some tech magazine.
But then the dude’s attention shifted to Tessa once again and his expression changed. Hardened into speculative interest.
Uh-uh, buddy. No one looks at this woman like that.
Something on Jonah’s face must’ve flashed like a neon light, because Tessa asked, “Are you okay?”
“Someone who looks familiar is at the bar. I should go over and…” beat his ass. But martini dude slid off his stool and into the crowd.
“I need to leave,” he told Tessa. “Get your coat.”
“What?”
“I want to walk you to your car.”
“I valet parked. Besides, people are still here.”
Damn, he hated to spook her, but he didn’t like the way that guy had up and disappeared. “There was a guy at the bar who has been staring holes through that sexy red shirt you’re wearing. And not in a good way. Now, I’d like to walk you to your car.”
Her gaze flickered over to the bar and back.
He set his half-finished drink aside and quickly shook hands and bumped fists with his former employees. “Y’all stay as long as you want. Everything’s on me.”
He helped Tessa into her coat and grabbed his jacket from a nearby chair.
Outside, Tessa handed the valet her ticket, then turned to Jonah. “Something strange just happened in there. You asked people to come out and then you acted like you wanted to be anywhere else but here.”
Blowing out a breath, he looked down the street where people were spilling out of bars and restaurants just like this one. Their laughter and smiles reminded him of his siblings. Happy, settled, freakin’ content because they were doing something important and had someone to share it with.
Like Britt with the Steele-Shepherd Wildlife Research Center, and Reid with the law enforcement training center. Grif ran the city and had a great family. Evie was a modern-day Florence Nightingale, and Micki was teaching a cyber warfare class and developing education software.
He wanted that. A new purpose other than the status of former video game king.
That was why the app idea appealed to him so much. His initial thought had been to have some of his former employees help him, but maybe he should forget about involving them. Maybe he was trying to re-create something he had no business re-creating.
And the thought of talking with Tessa about his plans, as duct-taped and chicken-wired together as they were, made him feel strangely exposed. Besides, she might not appreciate that a hardship in her life was now giving him purpose.
The valet drove up in a silver BMW, a symbol of just how successful Tessa had become, and parked it at the curb in front of them. Compassion clear in her eyes, Tessa stepped closer to Jonah and placed her palm on his chest. “What’s going on? For a few minutes in there, I thought you were going to turn and run.”
He’d wanted to run from her and she’d seen it. He didn’t need her to realize that how he felt about her made him vulnerable. So fucking defenseless.
So he went on the offensive, herding her toward her car. When her back was against the side, he lowered his face to her ear. “Stay out of my head. That wasn’t your job when I hired you, and it isn’t your job now.”
“I’m just being a friend.”
He couldn’t afford for her to have any active role in his life. He’d left Seattle because a city of half a million people was still too small to hide that he wanted her with an intensity that wasn’t in any way nice. Or easy. Or decent. “I don’t want you to be my friend, I want…”
“You want what?” Her hand came to his waist and her lips moved, their glossy red sheen making a haze come over his vision.
“This.” He put his arms on either side of her, caging her against the car, and covered her mouth with his. God, she tasted of expensive wine, hot woman, and somehow like cinnamon, just as she had the last time he’d kissed her.
For a few sweet seconds she responded, her lips nimble and mobile
under his. But soon—too damn soon—she was pushing against his shoulder. “Stop. Jonah, stop!”
Her panic pulled him out of his moment of insanity, and he yanked his mouth away from hers and stood there staring down at her, both of them breathing heavily, their chests brushing with each harsh inhale and exhale.
They were standing on a sidewalk in view of tons of people, and he would’ve gladly done Tessa against this car.
He had to accept that he’d never be able to control himself around this woman. If anything spoke of the shadows inside him, it was this, his complete disregard for what was right when it came to her. She clouded what little good judgment he had and turned it into a swirling vortex of confused lust. “God, Tessa, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean—”
“It’s not you.” She let her hands drop from his body and turned her face away.
How could it not be him? He’d caged her against the car and would’ve fucked her right here. No second thoughts.
“It’s the beer.”
“What?”
“I can’t… I can’t…beer…” She fumbled through her purse and held out a tin of breath mints.
He stepped back so quickly, his heel caught on the sidewalk seam and he had to do some fancy footwork to stay upright. He took the mints from her, popped a half dozen into his mouth, and crunched them violently between his teeth. Of course she couldn’t stand the smell of beer on a man’s breath. He should’ve realized that. “I didn’t… This shouldn’t have happened. It won’t happen again.”
“I wanted you to kiss me. It’s just that certain things…”
Make you remember. “I understand.”
“I don’t think you do,” she said softly. “Jonah, when are you going to stop denying that we want one another? Won’t you at least give us a chance to see what this is? What it could be?”
He couldn’t, and he was managing that by knowing she lived over twenty-six hundred miles away. “When do you fly back to Seattle?”
“I’m not. I’ve moved to Asheville to start my own corporate coaching company.” Her lips curved in a small smile. “I’m back home to stay.”
Stripping Bare (Steele Ridge Book 7) Page 3