But what about the fear of what the king had ordained?
Likhvanbai once told her that Ala-ud-Din Khilji had planned to invade Gujarat around Samvat 1356 (1299 CE). He had to pass through the Dhori roads of Mewar because that was the only accessible link to Gujarat in those days. The entire region was under Gora’s charge, who did not allow the Turks to go past. An armed confrontation had ensued between Ala-ud-Din’s royal army and Gora’s forces. The Turks were defeated. But, by that time, Maharawal Samar Singh, Ratan Singh’s father, had judged the immensity of the power of Ala-ud-Din’s army. Deciding not to get involved in the tussle, he allowed them to pass through their territory. Gora did not agree with the decision. Maharawal Samar Singh understood and respected his sentiments but was bound by his limitations. He did not want to invite trouble unnecessarily.
It was because of Raghav Chetan’s chicanery that Gora was living on the sidelines. Raghav had poisoned Mahawaral Ratan Singh’s mind against Gora. Influenced by him, the maharawal had suspended Gora.
It was Gora Rawat who had forbidden Raghav from entering the women’s apartments without permission. His experienced eyes had sensed that Raghav was not only an evil soul but also a man of malicious intentions. Dedicating two hours to the practice of yoga early in the morning seemed to have made him believe that he was entitled to do anything.
Instigated by Raghav, the Rajan had punished the honest and dedicated Gora.
For a moment, Padmini felt anger flickering towards the Rajan. Why was he pleased with dishonest hangers-on? Why did he treat honest, straightforward and plain-spoken persons as enemies? If, in this critical situation, Gora takes up the gauntlet, the people of this land will welcome it. All high-ranking officers of the state have great regard for him. Even Prince Veerbhan, as they say, is a great admirer of Gora.
She stopped at the thought of Veerbhan. She seemed to have guessed that after their conversation, Veerbhan would have been in a state of inner conflict, with serious misgivings in his mind about the parishad’s decision.
It is quite possible that he is going through a phase of indecisiveness. Now that he is struggling with indecision and doubts, it is the right time to approach him. His consent is most important at this juncture. Even now, it is not too late. I noticed that though he is not kindly disposed to me, he is not cruel at heart.
But she was not sure whether Gora Rawat would pay heed to any request; whether he would take the risk of making a commitment, and whether he could forget the insults heaped on him. She had her doubts. The Rajan had disregarded him, which he didn’t deserve, and had denied him the credit he deserved.
What if one gets the cold shoulder on approaching him? And would the Rajan accept it calmly once he comes to know? Above all, would it be right to contact a suspended general?
The idea that she had enthused over took no time to dissipate. Various thoughts in conflict with each other took over. And again, in no time, she was in the grip of a dilemma. Once again, despair took over. Everything appeared to be in a state of utter confusion.
She regained her composure. No, this apprehension is born out of the deep-seated fear in my heart during this hour of crisis. She had to act not only as a faithful wife but as a queen. This was the moment of truth, the words flashed in her mind. She alone was the master of this moment.
How can subjecting a woman to indignity be an act of dharma? Righteousness is the spirit of dharma, which inspires one to act nobly and set ideals worth emulating. It opens up doors to a new liberation. The path of liberation does not follow a particular route. It has to be discovered.
Gora was a brave man. Bravery was deeply embedded in his character. Besides, he was a man of wisdom who would pull out all the stops to protect the truth. He had to be approached. There was no other option.
It would be her first and last effort.
The more she thought about it, the stronger her resolve became and the faster her ambivalence dissolved.
This decision cannot be delayed further; it cannot be put off till tomorrow because tomorrow exists only in the realm of imagination. It never comes. What exists in reality is today; this very moment. It’s now or never. I must go.
As soon as this thought took root in her mind, she decided to act on it. She got up and felt as though the power of every nerve, of every fibre, had converged; her past life and all that the future held had merged into the present. Drawing strength from an unknown source of inspiration, she was filled with tremendous self-assertion. There was no ambiguity, no conflict and no uncertainty in her mind.
‘I must go and meet him.’
Deep in her heart she felt a feeble ruddy glow akin to the first light that appears at dawn to dispel the darkness of the night.
An unflagging steadiness was growing in her heart. It was an unfamiliar, incorporeal strength. Breaking away from her image as a soft and delicate person, she girded herself to face the situation with determination and courage. She believed that noble thoughts and sacred affirmations had the blessings of God. With this thought in mind, she felt as if a weight had been lifted off her. The silent powers of nature seemed to give her strength. She had a feeling that some unknown forces were taking care of her.
The night was nearing its end. Some stars were still twinkling. The dim light of early dawn had started spreading.
Sugna stayed awake till late. Padmini was conscious of her presence all through. Sitting close to the door constantly, Sugna had dozed off and slumped to the floor. Padmini shook her gently to wake her. ‘Sugna! Sugna!’
Sugna woke up with a start and squinted. Before she was fully awake, Padmini said to her, ‘Sugna! Go and get the palanquin ready. I have to go right now, at this very moment.’
Bewildered, she stared at Padmini quizzically. Half asleep, half awake, she couldn’t understand what the matter was. Her eyebrows narrowed. It was not very often that Rani Padmini went out of her apartment. When she did, it was to go to the temple or to attend some special celebration. But why today? And all of a sudden? That too at this odd hour? She stared at her Ranisa open-mouthed. At that moment, Padmini did not look like her usual self: simple and innocent as a child. Sugna was confused. Unable to think clearly, she kept sitting apprehensively.
‘Hurry up before anybody asks why and wherefore,’ Padmini said, ‘There’s no time to answer any questions. Be quick and call the attendants. Ask them to spruce up the palanquin.’
Sugna rearranged her apparel and was about to leave when Padmini impressed upon her the gravity of the situation. ‘Tell the attendants that they have to take Ranisa to Gora Rawat’s residence. Tell them to be ready immediately as they have to set off early, before the sun rises.’
Just as Sugna mechanically turned to go out, Padmini cautioned her, ‘Don’t let anybody else know. Just get the palanquin ready and come back.’
* * *
Made of sandalwood, the palanquin was adorned with strings of pearls and gems. Padmini, accompanied by Sugna, sat inside. A new sense of optimism was pervading her in an atmosphere where people were gripped by a sense of impending gloom. She looked out from the curtained window. Not a soul was in sight. The streets were deserted. Every home, every doorpost, every door and every panel appeared to bow down silently in despair.
But Padmini was seeing far beyond; she had retreated into her world of thoughts. For a brief moment, a question arose in her mind. Did she take the decision of discussing the matter with Gora all of a sudden, or was the idea already embedded in her mind?
The palanquin moved at a steady pace. Its rhythm slowly calmed the turmoil in her mind. The wind was light and the weather seemed quite favourable.
The palanquin was close to Gora’s house. She looked out and saw that somebody, not clearly identifiable, was standing on one side of the house. She looked at the figure carefully and felt that it might be Gora himself. Standing outside what looked like a stable, a man was stroking a white horse fondly. The steed had turned its neck backwards and was swishing its tail and neighing.
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The man did not miss the palanquin heading in his direction. Startled, he tried to scrutinize it. It seemed to be the royal palanquin from the queen’s apartment. There was no mistake; it was definitely coming towards his residence. He became alert and began to watch carefully.
Sugna emerged from the palanquin and asked the bearers, ‘Is this the house of Gora Rawat? Are you sure?’
‘Gora Rawat’s house is a well-known place in Chittor,’ replied the youngest attendant.
The morning light had not spread completely. In the dim light, Gora could not see or understand anything clearly. However, from the concern in the voice of the woman standing at a distance, he guessed there was certainly something serious and confidential. He pulled the bridle, turned the horse to one side and positioned it well out of harm’s way. Then he approached them and said, ‘Yes, I am Gora. Why did you take the trouble to come to this humble servant’s residence?’
Sugna bowed respectfully and said, ‘Maharani Padmini has come to seek your advice. She wants to consult you.’
‘Rani Padmini?’ Gora was stunned. For a moment he couldn’t believe his ears. Before he could say anything, Padmini stepped out of the royal palanquin. Gora bowed and paid obeisance to her. Most humbly, he said, ‘Why did you take the trouble, Ranisa? You should have sent for me, your servant, instead.’
Padmini looked admiringly at Gora’s slim and well-built body. His strong frame reminded her of Sage Dadhichi. Stories suggested that the sage had offered his bones to the gods for them to make a thunderbolt, which Indra used to defeat Vritasur and other demons. Strength radiated from his body, and on his face was the glow of a mighty warrior. There was no look of acrimony or resignation on his face. Though he was gentle, absolutely dignified with affection in his eyes and serenity on his face, adversity had made him intense and earnest.
With utmost respect, he ushered the younger queen of Mewar into his house. Devoid of all trappings of luxury and comfort, the room was almost bare. On one side, a white sheet, clean but very old, had been spread on the floor. In one corner, on a small table, was a sharp arrow attached to a bowstring.
It didn’t take her long to understand that Gora had sold all his belongings to save his self-respect.
He said deferentially, ‘The women and children of the house have gone to the temple of Samidheshwar. A night-long vigil of devotional singing has been organized there. I was with them and had just returned. With your permission, may I go and bring them back to welcome you?’
‘No, no. Let them enjoy themselves. This is no time for formality. I have come here for a special purpose.’
Gora couldn’t fathom what the queen wanted to say. Curiously, he said, ‘Please give me a command, Ranisa!’
‘You know what has happened and how it happened. Now that we are facing a bad time, you should forget and forgive everything. I beg of you. I have come to you with a lot of hope and trust. And this trust is not without reason,’ replied Padmini.
‘Please don’t embarrass me. It’ll be my privilege to obey your orders, Ranisa! It will be my good fortune to be able to prove my loyalty.’ His self-consciousness did not go away completely, but he started speaking more freely.
Padmini watched Gora closely, carefully. Despite doubts lingering in her mind, she wanted to be sure if he was genuinely committing himself or if he was saying so just to give her false hopes. She felt a huge surge of relief and happiness to see a glint of determination in his eyes. She wanted to make it clear, in no uncertain terms, that she always had full faith in him and that she firmly believed that he would be able to protect the honour of Mewar.
She narrated to him in detail the incident of Veerbhan’s visit and the parishad’s decision that was conveyed to her. Coming straight from her heart, each and every word was drenched in pain. Recalling the conversation, she felt as though her entire being was smouldering. Every now and again, her throat would constrict, bringing tears to her eyes.
Gora heard her till the end with unwavering concentration. Her otherwise composed visage quivered a little every now and then. Even though he was listening to her intently, a whole stream of thoughts ran alongside in his head.
After she had finished, the queen said, ‘I have come here to remind you of your capabilities. The whole of Chittor knows that you are brave, a veteran warrior full of energy and vigour, and above all, you have always taken a righteous and principled stand.’
Gora didn’t say a word. Lost in labyrinthine thoughts, he was silent and grim-faced. Padmini gazed at him with unblinking eyes. He was her last hope. She felt that his heart, too, was as heavy as her own. Padmini said piteously, ‘The life of the Rajan, as well as my honour, is at stake. I have come to you with the hope that you will protect us.’
‘Please don’t embarrass me again and again, Ranisa! I am fully conscious of my responsibilities during this difficult time. I do not know how far I’ll be able to succeed in my efforts, but I’d stop at nothing to do all I can and should do.’ His eyes were moist with intense emotions; his voice revealed a firm assurance.
Deep in thought again, he had absolutely no doubt about what his mission entailed. It was only the nuances of how he would go about fulfilling it that needed to be drawn out.
Adverse conditions had made Gora very patient. There was no trace of worry or distress lining his face. When he emerged from his train of thoughts, he said, ‘You need not worry, Ranisa. I assure you, he will never succeed in his sinful design.’ His humble yet assertive tone came straight from the core of his heart. The assurance in Gora’s words strengthened her confidence that he would be able to rise to the challenge.
Padmini wanted to tread cautiously, which is why she wanted Gora to seek consent from Prince Veerbhan, to whom the king would pass on the baton. ‘Prince Veerbhan’s consent is necessary. So, before finalizing any plan, we must have his permission. The responsibility of bringing him around has to be shouldered by you.’
Seeing the pain deepening in her eyes, Gora said reassuringly, ‘Don’t worry about that, please. I know him personally. I know his character well. The enthusiasm to do something, and also some impatience, are part of his personality. He is gentle and easy to be with, which is why he is unable to hide his emotions. It will not be difficult for us to explain to him that justice and morality demand that we fight for our self-respect. When he visited you, he must have been under some momentary pressure. This is not his inherent nature. But rest assured, this servant of yours will not finalize any plan without his consent.’
Despite this, the apprehensions in Padmini’s mind were not completely resolved. She said, ‘Before formulating any plan of action, we need to consider all aspects of the matter. The terror in our minds, a sense of gloom and failure, and a defeatist attitude has made this task even more difficult. I have unshakable faith in you, which prompted me to approach you. But we need the support and involvement of other military generals and warlords as well. They, too, have to be taken into confidence. When fear intensifies, it takes time to awaken courage in people. We have to make them realize their inner strength and self-confidence in a very short time. The brazenness and ferocity of the tyrant has weakened their morale and fighting spirit. It is, therefore, incumbent on you to awaken in them the dormant Kshatriya dharma, the heroism of a born warrior.’
A gentle radiance came over Gora’s face.
Padmini continued, ‘The people are despondent. Fear of death has gripped them. This does not augur well for our state. We need to attack this frustrated mindset and help them regain courage and confidence.’
‘I understand what you expect from me, Ranisa! Your humble servant will proceed according to your wishes.’
Padmini’s mind was crowded with all kinds of thoughts. But she was not as perturbed as before. Gora’s support had pacified her.
After a pause, Gora said, ‘Ranisa, I too have a request to make.’
‘Please go ahead,’ Padmini raised her head to look at him.
‘My elder brother, Ga
van, has a son. His name is Badal.’
‘Yes, I have heard of him.’
‘He is a brave and sharp-minded warrior. He is not merely a skilled fighter; he has something deeper inside him. He confronted the Turks when he was posted at the Lion Gate, through which the paths from the Narmada valley on the north head towards the south. From the garrison atop the hillside, he foiled the royal forces’ attempts at intruding into our territory. He made the blockade impenetrable for the Turks. I feel that he may prove to be a pillar of great strength in this fight. If you personally ask him to join me in our operation, he will do so with added enthusiasm.’
An expression of reassuring confidence returned to his eyes.
‘Indeed. I too am curious about his acts of bravery and remarkable capabilities. Where can I meet him?’
‘He should be here any moment. Every morning he goes to a big playground to hone his horsemanship as part of his daily exercise.’
Just then they heard a horse outside. Gora went out of the room.
Padmini began to wonder how the brave Gora had agreed to face the enemy without any fear or second thought. His lack of hesitation indicated clarity of thought, as though any inner conflict, lack of fearlessness, and aimlessness were not part of his nature. It was apparent that he did not have to think twice. He had suffered so much, and yet he had indomitable faith in life.
Gora returned with Badal. Padmini looked at him, a twenty-or twenty-two-year-old strapping, young lad. Regular exercise and vigorous tasks had ensured his body was well-sculpted, sinewy and powerful. A fire-like glow shone on his face, and his personality as a whole had an unusual agility, discipline, sturdiness, enthusiasm and a spirit of dedication.
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