by Teresa Hill
Finally, he was back, and there she was, curled up in a blanket, sitting on the sofa on the porch on a perfect fall morning, sunlight leaving her practically glowing. She had a pretty smile on her face, some color in her cheeks and all that glorious, golden hair.
Christ, she was beautiful.
Just insanely beautiful in a way that had him fumbling for even the most mundane of things to say, like... Hi or Good morning. Words simply would not come out of his mouth.
The cabin wasn't well lit, was even worse on a gloomy day or at night, and now, seeing her in the full light of day...
Men probably made fools of themselves all the time over her.
Fortunately for him, he had a moment to try to pull himself together while she fussed over the dog, petting his giant head, lighting up even more at the sight of him. Aidan was jealous of the damned dog. He wanted her face to light up at the sight of him. He wanted to have the right to rush to her, get that close and be greeted with a look of pure joy.
"Hi," she said finally, a bit shyly, glancing at him.
"Hi," he managed.
Then he remembered his wayward hand on her breast. He still had to apologize, and it wasn't something he could do while staring at her and remembering how insanely soft and perfect her breast had felt in his hand. The sincerity level would plummet, especially if he looked like he was not just thinking about it, but had enjoyed the hell out of it, while he apologized.
"Grace, about this morning..." He wasn't even certain she'd remember. She'd been sleepy, too. But if she did remember..."I was completely out of line. I'm sorry."
She looked puzzled. "Was there something I missed?"
"The hand?" He held it out, kind of in the shape it would have if it were still curled around her breast. The moment he realized it, his hand dropped like a stone.
"Oh, that." A bit more color bloomed in her pretty cheeks. "I wasn't sure if it actually happened."
"It did."
"Well." She shrugged, smiled. "It wasn't exactly a tragedy."
"No, not that. I'd just hate for you to think I deliberately took advantage of the situation."
"No, Aidan. Never." She let him off the hook completely. "I think the rule is, if you were at least half-asleep, it doesn't really count."
"I was at least half-asleep." When it started. But then he'd woken up, and there he'd been, with his hand under her shirt, the warm curve of that perfect breast in his hand, and he remembered that with startling clarity.
She laughed a bit. "You look so uncomfortable. I'm not that fragile, either, Aidan. Please don't think of me that way."
"I don't. I just..." Wanted to take care of her, slay dragons for her. Erase every memory she had of her idiot husband, and then make any other problems she might have simply vanish.
That was what he wanted.
After not even a day.
"Forget it," she said.
"Well, that's not so easy," he admitted.
And wasn't that the perfect thing to say?
He winced. "I just keep making it worse, don't I?"
She laughed again. "If it helps, I could say I really loved sleeping with you."
"Yeah. Me, too. I really loved sleeping with you." He grinned back at her. "Honestly, Grace, I haven't slept that well in months. I felt so good when I woke up this morning."
"Me, too. It doesn't seem possible that one night's sleep could make that much of a difference but..."
The whole world looked different.
He waited, gave her time, but she didn't say that, and he didn't either. He really didn't want to completely freak her out. And yet, right now, he would have given his right arm to kiss her.
Really kiss her.
Just once.
Because he felt alive again.
Because he actually wanted to be alive again, and that was definitely a new feeling for him recently.
"I hope you didn't do too much this morning and pull open your incision again."
"I don't think so." He peeled off his high-tech, light-weight pullover, threw it over the arm of a chair beside him, pulled his T-shirt up and rolled the waistband of his sweatpants down on one side. No blood seeping through the bandage. "See? I'm good."
"Okay. I would have been really mad at you if you had."
"Grace, I know my own body," he said. "Barring emergencies, I'm actually careful to stay within my physical limits now. I know that's the only way I'm going to heal."
"But you did too much yesterday, and then first thing this morning—"
"I know. I overdid it yesterday, which makes my muscles tight and sore. So I need to loosen them up again. Walking is the best thing, and that's straight from my doctor's mouth."
"Okay, but you were gone for a while—"
"Because I was walking very slowly," he explained.
"Oh, okay. Good. But I'm still taking a look at that incision later to make sure the butterfly bandages are holding and put more medicine on it."
"Whatever you want to do." Aidan was fine with having those sweet, soft hands of hers on him for any reason.
"Thank you. Have you had coffee? I just made some. Why don't you get a cup and come sit with me? Enjoy the morning. It's a beautiful spot."
No way he was turning down any invitation from her. He got a mug and poured the coffee, went back outside and sat down in one of the chairs facing her, which seemed to puzzle her.
"You don't want to see the lake?" she asked. "It's perfect this morning."
"Honey, I can see the lake anytime I want. But you?" He shook his head, grinning. "With the gloomy weather yesterday and the bad lighting inside I couldn't see you that well until just a few minutes ago. Damn, Grace. I've seen nice-looking women before, but you? You're beautiful. More than that. I don't think I can come up with the words..."
"Oh," she said, as if disappointed.
"Get that all the time, huh?" he guessed.
She shrugged, gave him a wry grin.
"Gets old? Men raving about your looks?"
"They just get stupid," she confessed.
Aidan threw his head back and laughed. "Well, yeah, I can see that. We're highly visual creatures. We can't help it. That's how our brains work. And, yeah, we get stupid in the presence of breathtakingly gorgeous women."
"I didn't think you were going to be one of those guys." She sighed. "I didn't think you were going to be weird about it. And it was nice, that it didn't seem to matter to you. I mean, it's not really who I am. It's just a face. I was born this way."
Aidan leaned toward her. It was likely too much, too soon, but he couldn't seem to hold back where she was concerned. "The thing is, Grace, I think it's exactly who you are, beautiful inside and out."
She shot him a look that said she thought he was full of it.
"Hey, I wasn't trying to flatter you, I swear."
"You don't even know me," she argued. "It hasn't even been a full day."
"You think knowing someone deep down is really about the length of time involved?"
"Okay, point taken—"
"Aww, dammit." Too late, he remembered her husband. How long, he wondered, had she known him, and yet not really known him, even when she was married to the man? "I completely forgot, I swear."
"It's okay. I know you didn't mean it that way."
"Maybe because you feel like you know some things about me? Already? In less than a day?"
"All right. You got me there," she admitted.
"Thank you." And then he just let himself look at her, enjoy the sight of her, the smile that was all for him. Well, him and the dog, but that was okay.
This woman should always have a reason to smile. If she were his, he'd make it his mission in life to make her happy, to take care of her, to never hurt her.
If she were his...
It was ridiculous even to think about that. She was still all torn up over a husband who'd cheated on her. Aidan was a mess both physically and mentally, so wasn't he an appealing proposition for a woman? Never in his li
fe had he had so little to offer a woman, and what happened? She walked into his life. It was like some great cosmic joke. Here she is, and Sorry, you can't have her.
But he had her now, and he wanted to keep her for as long as he could.
"I was thinking, Tink's owner seemed really attached to him. She'd probably feel better knowing he's okay. Want to go with me? See how she's doing? If she needs anything? I mean, you don't have to be anywhere else today, do you?"
"No. Not really."
"I hate thinking about her being in the hospital and not having anybody."
"Of course. You're right. I just... I meant it when I said I want to search the cabin today. I want to see if my husband brought another woman here."
"You really want to know, Grace?"
She nodded, determined.
"You think it's going to make you feel better to know?" he asked, because he couldn't see how it would.
"I'll know, and I need to know," she insisted. "Will you help me?"
"Sure, if that's what you really want."
"Even though you think it's a bad idea?"
"I do, because it seems like you're already hurting and the details are either going to hurt you more or make you even madder or both. I don't see any point in that. Well, unless it somehow helps you get over the man. I'm all for that. But I hate the idea of us finding things here that will hurt you even more."
"But you'll help me?"
He nodded. "I told you, I'll do anything I can to help you. What do you want to do first?"
"Check on Maeve. We should call first. She may need some things from her cabin, and maybe there's a patio or something at the hospital where she could come outside and see Tink."
The dog had been stretched out, half asleep, at Grace's feet, but he perked up at the sound of his name and whined.
"We're taking him with us?" Aidan asked.
"We can't leave him here. He's scared, and he doesn't really know us or this place."
So, getting her into a restaurant for a nice meal was out. It was going to be less like a date and more like dog sitting, but it was Grace, and he'd take any time he could get with her.
Chapter 7
Maeve had had surgery that morning and was still sedated, Aidan learned when he was able to get a call through, so she couldn't tell them anything she might need. And she'd be in ICU at least for a few days, so no visit with the dog, although the nurse—who was probably breaking all kinds of rules by talking to him—said if his name was Tink, he was the only thing Maeve had asked about. No one else had come to visit or called.
Grace still didn't want to leave Tink, and the damned dog clearly knew it. He whined whenever she left his sight, even sat on the other side of the bathroom door pawing at it and crying while she showered and dressed.
Aidan was disgusted by the animal's behavior, but understood his devotion to the woman. "She likes me better than you," Aidan told him, hoping it was true. "And she's coming to town with me. You'd better not do anything to mess that up."
Grace came out of the bathroom in a cloud of steam and the most glorious scents imaginable. He wanted to take her in his arms and run his nose over as much of her skin as she'd allow.
"Were you out here threatening the dog?" she asked, standing there with wet hair, wearing a simple pair of jeans and a pale pink sweater, looking so soft and pretty it was all he could do to keep his hands off her.
"Maybe," he admitted.
She frowned at him.
"You smell delicious," he told her. And how he was going to go in there and shower in that same space where she had been—naked and dripping wet—with the scent that was all over her no doubt still lingering in the air inside, he didn't know.
"And you could be nicer to the dog," she said.
"He can't have you out of his sight without crying like a baby."
"Well, he's been through a traumatic experience—"
"Traumatic?"
"You said Maeve was something of a recluse, so she was probably Tink's whole world, and now as far as he knows, she's disappeared. Of course, he's upset."
"He's playing you, looking for sympathy and attention." And damned if the dog didn't give her his most pathetic look, right at that moment. "See?"
"I can't help it. I hate the idea of leaving him here all alone," she said.
"Okay, but all I have to drive is a motorcycle. No way it'd work for him, so we'd have to take your car. Do you really want that mess in your car?"
Tink whined pitifully, looking from Aidan to Grace with big, sad puppy dog eyes, the big baby.
"Oh, you poor, sweet thing." Grace scratched his head. "We're going to have to get him clean somehow, even if all we have is the shower."
Aidan groaned. "How? Because I doubt he's going to like it or that he'll stay in there willingly. Which means one of us will have to be outside the shower, keeping him in. And he won't exactly wash himself, so one of us will have to be in there with him, washing him."
"Well... Okay, that's what we'll do." She seemed determined and not the least bit uneasy.
Aidan thought his head was about to explode just imagining it. Was she kidding? She had to be kidding.
"You're going to strip your clothes off, and the two of us are going to herd this dog into the shower?" he began. "Then I'm going to stand on the other side of the shower door and keep shoving him back in there with you, while you soap him up and rinse him off? Because he probably weighs a hundred pounds, and I don't think you could hold him inside the shower, if he wanted out. So I think I have to be the one outside the door holding it shut, and honestly, Grace, I don't know if I can do that."
"You mean... because you'll tear your side open again?"
"No, because I don't think I can be in the same room with you while you're naked. Not to mention naked, soapy and wet. Although, I have to say, if that didn't give me a hard-on, I don't think anything ever will."
He didn't mean to add that last part, but his mind was fogged by the scent of her and now this image he had in his head of them giving the dog a shower, and then it was too late. He'd said it.
She laughed. "So, it's possible we could get the dog clean and help you with your little problem?"
Aidan just looked at her, dumbfounded for a long moment. Finally, he told her, "That is not a problem for you to fix, Grace."
"I didn't say it was. I was just thinking... You know, two birds, one stone?"
Stone? Really? Stone?
And then, just like that, he felt what he thought was the first hint of blood pooling in his groin. The vaguest hint. Nothing close to stone-like. He wasn't even certain he felt it. Maybe it was all wishful thinking on his part, because just like that, it was gone.
When he had the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen standing in front of him, ready to get naked for the sake of a dog? And, yeah, as an aside, maybe help him with his little impotence problem?
"I thought you'd be happy," she said, and he couldn't tell if she was teasing him or really trying to make him crazy. "I mean... to know that... everything was going to be okay. You know... Down there."
And then her gaze drifted downward, just for a moment, before rushing back to meet his eyes, and she gave him an impish little smile.
"You said the doctor was sure it would be fine, that you just needed some time, right?" she reasoned, like it was nothing to worry about. "So, what's the problem? I mean, are you really worried about that?"
"Yeah, I am. I'm a guy. We worry about that. Probably more than we should, but we do."
"But you said the doctor—"
"I know what he said, but it wasn't his body he was talking about. It's mine, and that's just not the kind of thing a man ever puts in the don't-worry-about-it column." Aidan hadn't really cared until she'd come along, because he hadn't been all that enamored with life as a whole or anything in it. So who cared if he could get it up? But now, he cared.
"And surely," he went on, "you don't expect me to believe that you... that someone who I suspect is
a very good girl, would—for reasons I can't understand—take off your clothes in front of a man who's practically a stranger, just to help him out with a problem like this?"
"Maybe I'm tired of being a good girl. Look where it's gotten me. Not that I mind being here with you. I'm talking about having a cheating rat of a husband. I still ended up with my life in a mess, good girl or not."
"So this would be about getting back at him?" Because that made some sense to him. It wasn't smart, and he didn't think she'd actually do it, but he could understand the impulse.
"Not completely. I just... You brought it up," she reminded him. "And made a joke about it. So I thought it was okay for me to joke about it, too. But I guess, like you said, guys really don't think anything about that is funny."
He just looked at her, her cheeks flushed, hair wet, face bare... She had gorgeous skin, and long, spiky, wet eyelashes, and big, pretty, blue eyes, and she was teasing him about being impotent? The world was a dark and twisted place at the moment, and yet, at the same time, full of possibilities and laughter and her, which meant there was no way it could truly be grim. Still, she was teasing him about this?
"I understand that it's really none of my business," she went on. "And if you don't want to talk about it, that's fine. I just thought... You haven't really tried to see if everything works, right? You said you hadn't been near a woman in months, so you really don't know what will happen, right?"
She'd asked him that? Really?
"You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to," she offered.
"No, it's..." He groaned. "We really are going to be those kinds of friends? Telling each other every damned thing?"
"If you want to."
He laughed, short and quick, couldn't help it. What the hell? "Okay, no. I haven't really tried. I mean, I haven't actually taken a woman's clothes off and climbed into bed with her and... tried."
"Well, there you go," she said, as if she'd proven her point.
He couldn't believe this. "You had a husband, Grace. You lived with a man for... how many years?"
"Three."
"Okay, three years. Surely you know it doesn't always take any... deliberate effort? For something like that to happen?"