“Cody, put your plate in the sink and wash your hands, then get upstairs and clean your room,” Abby instructed her son, who seemed not to notice the drama unfolding before his mother and aunts.
When Cody had left the room, Abby looked at Roger in confusion. “Your father didn’t know this woman had been pregnant with his child?”
Roger shook his head. “Theirs was an odd relationship. Father saw her only when he was in Washington, D.C. Months would go by when they didn’t see each other. He’s not even sure exactly what year she gave birth.”
Belinda wanted him to stop. She didn’t want to hear any more. Change had always frightened her and she feared his words would forever change the relationship she had with her sisters. In the deepest part of her heart, she feared the one who didn’t really belong was her.
“Why the subterfuge? Why come here as a worker and give a false name?” Abby asked.
Roger ducked his head, as if in embarrassment. “From the moment my father found out about having a daughter, he’s been possessed with the need to find her. Unfortunately, the day after getting the letter detailing her location, he suffered a series of strokes and has been in and out of hospitals for the past several months. He hasn’t been well enough to set the wheels in motion to find her. I took it upon myself to do that. I wanted to come out here and check out what kind of woman my sister might be. I figured my father would be better off not knowing if she were dead, or addicted to drugs, or something as equally appalling.”
He paused a moment, his jaw clenched with tension. “My father has a certain image to uphold, and he’s vulnerable not only to scandal, but to blackmail. I needed to find out more details before opening Pandora’s box.” The tension left his jaw. “But in the months I’ve been here, I know my father would be proud to call any one of the three of you daughter, and I’d be just as proud to be a brother to any one of you.” He gazed at each one of them with eyes the color of Belinda’s. “So, which one of-you three is adopted?”
“We don’t know,” Colette answered after a moment’s pause. “Abby found an envelope marked ‘adoption papers’ when we were young. We all agreed we wouldn’t look at them. At that time we didn’t want to know which one of us might be adopted.”
“But you have to look at them now.” Roger sat forward on the chair, his jaw once again tightened with tension. “I got a phone call last night that my father has had another heart attack, this one worse than any he’s had before. Time might be running out for him and his one wish is to meet his daughter.”
Belinda’s heart convulsed with anxiety. She knew they’d do what he asked. They’d open the papers and discover which of them was his sister. A dying man’s wish was more important than a childish vow made long ago.
“We have one small problem,” Abby said. “I don’t know where the papers are. When I went through Mother’s and Father’s things after their death, I didn’t find those particular papers.”
“They’ve got to be around here someplace,” Colette replied. She looked at Abby, then Belinda. “We’ll just have to look until we find them.”
“I can’t tell you what it would mean to my father,” Roger replied as he stood. He looked at Abby. “If it’s all right, I’d like a couple of days off. I want to fly home and check on my father:”
“Of course. Take as much time as you need,” Abby replied.
“The last report I got was that he’s stabilized, but I won’t feel comfortable until I see him for myself. In the meantime, if you could find those papers…I’d love to be able to give my dad some answers as soon as possible.”
“We’ll do our best to find answers for you,” Abby said. The three sisters stood, as well, and for a moment there was an awkward silence. Belinda felt as if she should say something…do something. After all, Roger might possibly be her half-brother.
Roger seemed to sense their internal turmoil. “I don’t expect anything around here to change. Until you find those papers and we know which of you is my sister, I intend to do my job just like all the other ranch hands.” Without waiting for a reply, he nodded goodbye and left the house.
“I think I’ll go check on some things in the barn,” Luke said as he rose from the table.
“I’ll go with you.” Hank also stood. Belinda realized the two men were leaving to give the sisters some time alone to digest what they’d just heard.
“I always feared a day like this would come.” Abby finally broke the silence as she sank down at the table.
“Nothing is going to change,” Colette replied. “I don’t care what those papers say, nothing is going to change the fact that you two are my sisters.”
“I agree,” Abby echoed.
Belinda nodded, but her heart beat an uneasy rhythm. Although she knew nothing could ever change the love she had for Abby and Colette, she knew nothing ever stayed static, and opening those adoption papers would change things between them. If what Roger said was true, one of them was the daughter of a U.S. senator.
“Do you think Roger was telling us the truth?” Colette asked, as if hearing Belinda’s last thought.
Abby shrugged. “It sounded rather farfetched, but somehow had the ring of truth to it.”
“He did have that newspaper clipping,” Belinda reminded them.
Abby sighed, her face mirroring the expression of stun that Belinda knew her own features wore. “I know there are boxes of papers and pictures and such in the basement, and some things still in the closet in Mom and Dad’s room. I’ve got a few things in the office I’ll need to go through again. I don’t know, maybe I overlooked the papers before.”
“I’ll go through the things in the basement,” Belinda offered.
“And I’ll search the bedroom and see what I can find,” Colette said.
Without discussing it, Belinda realized they had come to the decision to rescind the vow they’d made so many years before. Silently the three began clearing the breakfast dishes from the table.
“NOTHING,” Belinda said several hours later as she joined her sisters in the living room. “I found pictures, old report cards and handmade little gifts in those boxes in the basement. But no adoption papers.”
“And I didn’t find anything in the bedroom,” Colette said.
Abby shook her head. “Nothing in the office, either. I think I’ll go into town to see if I can speak with Mack Hargrove. As Mom and Dad’s lawyer for so many years, maybe he’ll know something about the papers.”
“If you don’t mind, I’ll ride into town with you. I’ve been intending to pick up a couple of sweaters for Brook,” Colette explained.
Abby nodded and looked at Belinda. “Want to take a ride with us?”
Belinda shook her head. “No, thanks. I think maybe I’ll take Candy out for a ride.”
“It’s a gorgeous day for it,” Abby observed.
Within minutes Abby, Colette, their husbands and kids had left for town. Belinda pulled on a lightweight jacket and stepped out onto the front porch.
The late afternoon sun was warm despite a slight nip in the air. The shadows cast by the trees and structures were long and deep, portending the coming sunset.
Billy Sims, one of the ranch hands, worked on a distant corral fence, painting a new section white to match the rest of the fencing. Belinda watched him for a moment. Abby had fired the sullen, dark-haired cowboy several months before because of his uncontrollable drinking problem. She’d recently rehired him, giving him a second chance at staying sober. It seemed all their workers had secrets, but none affected the Connor sisters as Roger’s did.
She frowned, recreating Roger’s features in her mind. Was it possible she was his sister? Did they share similar physical characteristics? They both had blue eyes, but so did Abby…as well as millions of other people in the world. Roger was fair, as was Belinda, but again that was no proof that they shared common genes.
She shook her head in an attempt to dispel those thoughts. Time would tell. When they found the adoption papers t
hey would know which of them was Roger’s sister. In the meantime, what she wanted most was to ride hard and fast, clear the muck from her mind.
Heading for the barn, she tried to dismiss all thoughts of Roger and the startling information he’d told her and her sisters.
She entered the barn and paused a moment for her eyes to adjust to the semidarkness. She heard a deep male voice coming from one of the stalls and recognized it as Bulldog’s. She found him brushing down Blackheart, Abby’s favorite horse. For a moment she stood just outside the stall door, listening to him coo and murmur to the horse.
“C’est un jour parfait…Parfait… That sounds like ice cream, don’t it, Blackheart,” he said.
Belinda froze. Bulldog was speaking French? As she remembered her parting words to Derek on the night of the Harvest Moon Dance, her blood boiled.
“Hi, Bulldog.” She opened the stall door and stepped inside where the huge man worked on the black horse.
“Hey, Belinda.” His eyes crinkled at the corners with his pleasure. “What are you doing out here?”
“I thought I’d take Candy for a ride,” she explained.
He nodded. “It’s a pretty evening for a nice ride.” He placed the brush down and smiled at her again. “C’est un jour parfait pour semarier.” He said the words slowly, carefully. “That’s French.” He beamed at her. “It means it’s a perfect day to get married.”
Don’t shoot the messenger, Belinda thought to herself, knowing Bulldog had no idea the French message would needle her. “Let me guess. Derek taught you how to say that.”
Bulldog nodded his head. “He surely did. Derek is my friend. He’s helping me learn French so I can impress Rhonda. She knows how to talk French.”
Again Belinda’s blood flowed hot and angry. How dare he manipulate Bulldog just to get under her skin? Well, she’d just ride over to Derek’s place and give him a piece of her mind. Saying goodbye to Bulldog, she headed for Candy’s stall.
Within minutes she rode out of the corral on Candy. While Abby and Colette preferred more spirited, challenging mounts, Belinda’s favorite was the gentle, sweet-natured quarterhorse with the caramelcolored mane.
She decided to ride for a while before heading to Derek’s. She gave Candy free rein, allowing the horse to set their pace as they passed the corrals and outbuildings and headed for open pasture.
She passed the dragon tree, its branches ablaze with autumn colors and again she thought of the vow she and her sisters had made so long ago.
On that particular night they had been children and the idea that one of them might be adopted had frightened them all. They were no longer children, but Belinda was still frightened. She’d always gained her strength from her sisters, her family, and she didn’t want anything to taint the very special relationship the three Connor women shared.
No matter how they all agreed that nothing would change, Belinda knew they were fooling themselves. Change was inevitable when the adoption papers were opened.
As Candy broke from a gallop to a run, Belinda threw her head back, wanting the brisk wind to blow her thoughts away as easily as it whipped her hair from the neat braid down her back.
She rode for a long time, letting the physical pleasure and rhythm of riding Candy soothe the tension that had knotted inside her for days.
Lately it seemed that each dawn brought a new set of problems rather than the promise of a beautiful day. The constant stress of trying to figure out how to save their home, Derek’s unexpected return and crazy ideas for marriage and now Roger’s bombshell…her nerves had been stretched taut for too long and she feared a snap was imminent.
The oranges and pinks of sunset faded from the sky as she turned Candy around and headed for the Walker place. Perhaps a little explosion of ire would be good for her soul, and she knew just who she wanted to aim a little ire toward.
She broke into the clearing of the Walker property and reined Candy to a halt, surprised at the house that seemed to have magically appeared since the last time she’d been here.
The former Walker house had been a simple onestory structure. The one that rose before her was twostory, with a wide, wrapping veranda that extended across the front and around to one side. Although unpainted and without trimwork, it was easy to visualize how attractive the house would be when completed.
“What do you think?” Derek’s voice startled her, and she squinted her eyes to find him sitting in the shadows on the veranda.
“I’m impressed,” she said reluctantly.
“Why don’t you get down from that horse and let me give you the twenty-five-cent tour?” He stood and approached her.
Although touring his new home was not the reason she’d come, she found herself curious to see inside the place where Derek would more than likely live out the rest of his life. She dismounted and tied Candy to the porch railing, then followed Derek through the front door.
While the outside looked like a traditional twostory, the inside belied the exterior facade. Belinda caught her breath as she stepped into a huge room with floor-to-ceiling windows across the back wall. The space was big enough to be divided into a formal living room, family room and kitchen, but it was obvious Derek had opted to forgo walls and instead create one large and airy living area.
“This will be the heart of the house, where we’ll eat our meals, talk about our day, watch the kids do their homework.”
Belinda studiously ignored the subtle implication that somehow she would be a part of his future family life. She wasn’t about to get caught up in any fantasy he might spin to trap her into agreeing to his preposterous marriage scheme.
“Come on upstairs and see the rest of the house.”
Reluctantly she followed him up the wide oak stairway to the upper level. The first room he led her to was obviously the master suite. A cot covered with blankets held center court in the otherwise empty, unfinished room. “I’m spending nights out here,” he explained. “I’m not taking any chances of somebody burning me out before I even get completely settled in.”
“Have you had a chance to speak with Junior about the original fire?” Belinda asked, trying to keep her mind focused away from the huge Jacuzzi tub that was the focal point of one corner of the room. It was far too easy to imagine the room lit with candles, bubbles spilling out as Derek folded his lanky length to join her in a tub of sweet-scented water.
He nodded, his eyes dark and hooded, giving nothing away of his inner thoughts. “I got copies of the reports a couple of days ago. Unfortunately there isn’t much to go on. All we really know is the fire started in the hallway just outside my bedroom and it was started with gasoline. A gas can was found in the woods, but there were no fingerprints on it.”
“How would somebody have gotten into the hallway?” she asked.
He shrugged. “I’d left the front door unlocked, knowing that Mom and Dad might come in early in the morning. I never worried about locking the doors at night This was my home, my community, and I trusted in its safety.” The blankness in his eyes dissipated, overshadowed by a cool hardness. “I won’t make the same mistake twice. Now I trust nobody.”
Yes, that’s what Belinda saw in his eyes. A loss of innocence. A naiveté betrayed. She recognized it because she’d lost the same when she’d received his letter after the fire. Innocence lost and illusions destroyed.
“This will be Tasha’s room,” he said as he led her into one of the rooms on the opposite side of the staircase from the master suite. “She’s the five-yearold. You’ll like her, she’s so bright and loving.”
“And this will be Toby’s room,” Derek explained as they entered another room. His features softened into a half smile. “Toby has been lost since his parents’ accident. He’s become pretty withdrawn. He’s going to require lots of love and attention.”
Belinda didn’t want to hear about these children. Already with just his brief description of the two parentless kids her heart swelled with compassion. And memories of another chi
ld.
She walked back down the stairway, wanting out of this house he was building, away from the future he was carefully planning for himself and the two children. “It’s a wonderful house,” she said as she reached the front door. “And you should be very happy here.”
He leaned against the stair railing, his eyes once again cold and distant. “I don’t think about my own happiness much.”
His words created a haunting inside Belinda. What had happened to him in the last three years that had made him change? She knew why she’d lost her ability to dream of happiness, but what had happened to him?
Her very curiosity about him irritated her. He was the past, her past, and she had no desire to revisit that past in any way. “Derek, I came by because I want you to leave Bulldog alone. I don’t like the idea of you manipulating a friendship with him just to teach him a little French and get under my skin.”
“I’m not manipulating a friendship with Bulldog. He is a friend.” A small smile curved the corners of his mouth. “And he shows a real aptitude for foreign languages.”
Belinda opened the door and stepped out onto the porch, surprised that while they’d been inside the sun had gone down, leaving the surreal illumination of twilight.
“Belinda.” Derek grabbed her arm before she could step off the porch. He pulled her up against him, his closeness stealing her breath away. “All I’m asking from you is a little bit of your time.” The warmth of his breath fanned her face and the scent of him surrounded her. Heat radiated from his body, a warmth that counteracted the coolness of the night air.
She struggled to step away from him. “Let me go.”
“Not until you’ve heard everything I have to say.”
He sighed, but didn’t release his hold on her. “I’ll admit I was wrong to tell the judge my marriage to you was imminent. But I wanted those kids and your name popped into my head before I’d consciously thought everything through.” He let go of her and stepped back, then raked a hand through his hair. “I’ve already promised you that the marriage would be in name only. I don’t want a physical relationship with you, nor do I want any kind of emotional commitment. We had our time together years ago and that book is now closed. But, Belinda, I need you. Every day you procrastinate about our marriage is another day those two little kids stay in foster care.”
Sunrise Vows Page 5