Obviously, my attempt at reconciliation went wrong as hell!
“Hello?”
“Hey baby.”
The way Damion purred into the phone made me feel even worse. If it wasn’t obvious before, it was more than apparent now that I had to stop messing around with Damion. Having sex with him was a mistake and it definitely couldn’t and wouldn’t happen again.
And I was not going to tell him about the pregnancy. As far as I was concerned, even though I didn’t know what I was going to do, Damion was never going to know about this baby.
“Hey, Damion.”
“I won’t keep you long. I know the charges to talk on your cell are crazy out there.”
“Exactly.”
“You and the girls havin’ a good time?”
Of course, Damion thought that I was in Mexico with Lyric and Vic. That’s what I told him before I confessed that I had a man. Something told me that he was calling so much while I was in Puerto Vallarta because, after he learned that I had a man, he kinda figured that Blood was here too.
“We’re having a really good time. The resort is beautiful. I am actually running late for dinner.”
“That’s cool. I’ll talk to you later. See you when you get home?”
Shit!
“Sure,” I lied. “See you when I get home.”
I hung up not believing that this man was actually on my ass knowing that I had a whole boyfriend!
Following Blood’s instructions, I was leaving the suite to meet him at a secluded area of the beach that he pointed out earlier today. He told me to dress up, so I did as I was told and wore a very beautiful floral Dolce and Gabbana silk maxi dress with matching stiletto sandals. As I walked through the resort, I tried to imagine what he was up to. Like I said before, he spent every moment of this trip making it as romantic as possible; couples massages, sex on the beach, and even a late night movie on the beach- things his thug ass would never do in the states.
Tea lights led the way to the secluded beach. That hadn’t caught me off guard until they literally led to a table set for two with Blood standing next to it in the finest linen suit I’d ever seen. I nearly cried because I had never seen my man dressed in anything but jeans. Rarely would he even wear cargo pants, so my heart melted to know that he’d put forth the effort to make such an impression on me.
I had to get rid of my heels once on the sand, so I kicked them off frantically and ran to him, hugging and kissing him on his cheek.
“Oh my God! You look amazing!”
He did. He even smelled just as good as he looked. If he was trying to put the fire back in our relationship, it was working… thus far.
He pulled my chair out for me and everything. I couldn’t believe it. Blood was from the streets, so little things like pulling my chair out he had never done. I couldn’t even get the car door opened for me back at home. He showed his love in other ways; Louis Vuitton this, Gucci that, Lexus this.
No complaints here.
“What’s all this about?”
Looking into his eyes over the candlelight, I was able to remember who I fell in love with. I could remember the man that I avoided like the plague back in 2007, the man that I refused to have sex with because of my celibacy but he attempted to buy it with the same high-end things that he gives me now. I remembered back when I was pregnant with a man’s baby who didn’t even want me and how Blood held me and that baby down, rubbing my feet, taking me to the doctor, paying my mortgage, and giving me moral support when I would cry over my baby’s father. I remembered when I thought Blood was dead and the sadness that I felt when I thought that I would never see him again.
I stared into his eyes as all of those things came back to me. He was looking into my eyes like he was remembering and appreciating the same things about me.
“I love you, Tricey.”
Immediately, I responded, “I know, baby,” as he grabbed my hand and kissed it.
“And I am so sorry.”
I quieted because I was speechless as I thought I saw tears in his eyes. My man was a goon, a street nigga who rarely showed fear or intimidation, so to see the glass in his eyes, even if he was too much of a man to let the tears fall, let me know that, no matter what shit he found himself in, this man loved me.
“I didn’t mean to do it, baby, I swear. And I know that it’s going to take a lot to get our household back right, but I want it back.”
My heart skipped so many beats. I had let the past few weeks let me forget the kind of devotion this man had for me. Obviously there were some flaws in him that made him lie to me, but one lie, out of an immeasurable amount of times that he’s shown me dedication and loyalty, wasn’t bad.
I had to realize that it wasn’t that bad at all.
Thirteen
Sunday, September 16, 2012
LYRIC
I had been spending the last two days under Marcel.
Tricey and Blood said that we could spend the last days of our trip coupled up, rather than forced to do group activities like water polo and snorkeling. I believe me and Vic’s altercation had something to do with that, but I was too cool with spending the rest of our days in Puerto Vallarta under my man.
However, we were leaving in the morning, so I wanted to stop by Tricey’s room to have a little quality time with her before we got back to our regular lives in Chicago.
“Hey, beau,” I greeted her as I entered her suite.
Tricey looked so pretty in a fitted maxi dress with mesh inserts. She looked stylishly fabulous, but emotionally a hot mess.
She said hello and hugged me with little energy.
“What’s wrong, girl?”
I could sense that something had gone wrong. I quickly listened for sounds of Blood in other areas of the suite, but heard nothing.
“Where is Blood?”
“He’s gone to get us some lunch.”
“What’s wrong?”
“Girl,” she said with a sigh as she walked out onto the patio.
She sat in the posh patio chair. I was happy to sit beside her. My feet were killing me, since I was trying to be cute that day and walk around in five inch pumps. They made my legs look good in my blue jean dukes though, so I was suffering through the pain for the sake of looking hot.
I noticed that Tricey had drifted off into misery and was lost in her own thoughts. “Girl, what the hell is going on?”
Then she spit it out. “I’m pregnant.”
Needless to say, I was a bit shocked. I knew that Tricey was planning on getting pregnant, but that was before Mauri appeared out of thin air. She hadn’t even told me that she thought she might be pregnant.
“Really?! Did you just find out or something?”
“I have known for little over a week.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?! And why the long face?! I thought you were ready to have a baby with Blood.”
Tears filled her eyes. She fought hard to keep them from falling onto her perfectly made up face.
Then, she dropped a bomb. “It’s not Blood’s baby.”
My mouth hit the floor. I tried hard to fix it, to act as if what she said wasn’t that bad. But, fuck that, no need in fronting for my best friend. “Whose is it, Tricey?!”
“Damion’s.”
She covered her face, seemingly to hide her eyes from seeing my horrified reaction.
“You slept with Damion?! When did this happen?!”
“Girl, a few weeks ago. It was an accident.”
“Did you slip and fall on the dick?!” I attempted to laugh so that she would laugh, but it didn’t work.
“I can’t believe that I’m pregnant,” she pouted.
“What are you going to do?”
“I’m not having it, of course.”
Pressure seemed to release from my shoulders. Not that Tricey being pregnant was my problem, but I felt my girl’s pain being in this position.
Yet, the position was null and void if she didn’t plan on keeping the baby.<
br />
As I rested my hand on her back, attempting to rub her frustrations away, I told her, “Well, in that case, it will be okay. Nobody has to know but us.”
“I know, but it’s just frustrating me to be in this position, especially with what Blood and I are going through. I am trying to forgive him and work this out so that my family will be okay. And now this?! I cannot believe that I’m pregnant.”
“You’re what?”
Blood’s voice came out of nowhere- so much so that Tricey and I jumped out of our skin.
Nervousness ran through my body as Tricey and I noticed him standing in the doorway of the patio. I am sure that Tricey was wondering the same things that I was; how long had he been standing there and how much had he heard?
“You’re pregnant, Tricey?”
Quickly, she tried to fix it. “I think that I am.”
But Blood wasn’t buying that shit. He came out onto the patio with so much confusion on his face. “No, I just heard you say that you can’t believe that you’re pregnant. Why didn’t you tell me?!”
I was standing to make my exit. This wasn’t a conversation that I needed to be in the middle of.
Tricey was stuck; didn’t know what the hell to say first, so I spoke up. “Tricey, I am going to go, okay?”
I wanted her to give me a sign, something telling me if she wanted me to stay, if she wanted me to call for help, cuz this nigga was about to kill her, anything!
Yet, she just muttered, “Okay,” while running her fingers through her hair in frustration and looking up at Blood with eyes full of anxiety.
As I left out of that suite, I said a little prayer for my friend.
Tricey
“Tricey, tell me the truth. Are you pregnant?”
By now, Blood had replaced Lyric’s seat. He was now sitting beside me as I held my hand over my face, trying hard to hide my fear and think of what to say.
I had to tell the truth. I couldn’t lie. By the look on his face, he had heard me loud and clear. I just wondered how much he’d heard. “Yes, Blood, I’m pregnant.”
Finally, I looked into his eyes. I had to man up and get my shit together. I couldn’t let this trip and how romantic he’d been lead me to saying or doing anything stupid that would get me caught up. Beyond the guilt, I made myself remember how Blood had royally fucked up first, so I had little to feel bad about and a lot to make sure that I hid well.
“Why didn’t you tell me?!”
Immediately, I put on a big front and got defensive. “Because we’ve been going through so much shit at home.”
“How far along are you?”
Quickly, I tried to remember the last time that we had sex before Mauri came into the picture, because since then, we had only very recently had sex, so recently that I wouldn’t even know that I was pregnant yet. “Eight weeks.”
“So what’s the problem? Why didn’t you tell me?!”
“Because I’m not having it.”
“Why not?!”
Apparently, he hadn’t heard a thing that I said regarding Damion. I thanked God for that as I continued to convince Blood that I couldn’t have this baby. “Because we have two small kids already. Did you forget about that?”
Despite the fact that this was Damion’s baby, I couldn’t have another baby period, seeing it as though I now had a four year old and a one year old in my home.
“I can afford three kids,” he replied, like I should have known better.
“But my energy can’t afford to keep up with them! Blood, you are always either making runs or out of town. How can I look after two small kids while pregnant?!”
As if it were no issue at all, his response was, “I’ll hire a nanny.”
Terror entered my body like the powerful force of the ocean that played as our backyard. I couldn’t believe the urgency and sincerity that I saw in this man’s eyes as he held my hand and begged me to have this baby. “Tricey, please don’t kill my baby. If it will make things better, I’ll send Mauri back.”
“Just like that? If it’s that easy for you to send him back, then why is he here in the first place?” I could see the frustration pouring from him as I made very valid arguments. “Blood, this baby isn’t going to fix things.”
I said that because, by the look on his face, I felt like he wanted me to have this baby because it would be something else forcing me to stay with him no matter what.
“Tricey, you’re my woman. We’ve been through everything together. I don’t want you to have this baby because it might fix anything. I want you to have this baby because I’ve been waiting on this moment for years. Please don’t take that away from me because I made a mistake. Please.”
STAR
Sitting across from my parole officer was nerve wrecking. Initially, when I arrived for my monthly visit I was cool. Then, as Officer Taylor looked over my freshly done hair, nails, and new outfit in scrutiny, I realized that maybe I should have dumbed it down a bit for my visit.
“So what’s going on with you, Ms. Anderson? How is work?”
Officer Taylor was a young probation officer. He couldn’t have been more than thirty. He reminded me a lot of Malik given his age. Unlike Malik, he treated me like a criminal and was nowhere near as fine as Malik.
He had an old skool fro that was barely shaped up and thick glasses, like they were government issued.
“Work is fine. It’s work,” I replied.
“Humph,” he muttered with his hand on his chin as he looked me up and down.
He stared at me and I simply stared back at him. This motherfucka really made me sick. He was one of those people that took their job over and beyond because, for once in his life, he was in charge and had some importance.
“Have you been escorting, Ms. Anderson?”
His tone was so judgmental and critical, but I shrugged it off. I was use to it by now. I had been being interrogated by him monthly for the last year.
“Of course, not,” I lied.
“You only make seven dollars an hour at the grocery store. How can you afford this hair and new clothes?”
I had been reading men for years, so I could see right through him. I knew that it more so angered him that I had better things than he did, while I was the one that was the parolee and he worked his ass off every day.
“I have family that help me out a lot,” I answered with a smile.
“Humph,” he muttered again. With a roll of his eyes, he began to shift through paper work. “You only have two months left on parole. What are your plans after that? Are you going to school? Do you plan on getting custody of your son?”
“I don’t know what I am going to do career wise, but I am definitely going to get custody of my son.”
“You said that with a little anger,” Officer Taylor said, sensing my irritation with not being the legal guardian of Jordan. “You can’t be mad that your mother has custody of your child. Had you not committed these crimes, you would have never gone to jail and you would have custody. Lesson learned.”
I bit my tongue. Being on parole was like gaining an additional parent that made you sit through a therapy session monthly. I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t wait for these eyes to be off of me in the next two months.
“C’mon, Ms. Anderson. Let’s go take this drug test. Hope you pass.”
I wanted to wipe that arrogant smirk off of his face with my foot. Again, I calmed down and told myself that I only had two more months. I thought of the freedom of being able to finally live on my own and raise my son how I saw fit.
I even thought of the possibilities of having that freedom with DeShawn, but that was more of a far-fetched fantasy than a thought. I hadn’t seen him since Wednesday.
On Wednesday, we kicked it like normal; ate and drank. Surprisingly, he bent a few blocks while I was in his car. Of course he left me in the car while he ran in this and that spot. When his phone rang, he said the minimal; not wanting me to hear his personal business.
We went back to th
e hotel, fucked, and, again, he paid me for every hour that he spent with me. I took it of course, but I felt like such a whore. Ironically, I never felt like that when I was with my regular customers. I took it as them needing me, which is why they pay. But it was apparent that DeShawn was using me while my heart wondered if he would ever call again.
Fourteen
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
STAR
Tuesday, I finally got that call.
I should have been ashamed the way that I was waiting around for this man to call me just to use me, but, despite the awkward tension, there were advantages to being with him.
I could actually stomach sleeping with him, and he spent so much time with me when he did that I made good money while doing it.
There was still a lot of tension between us and a lot of doubt in the air. As we rode around Tuesday morning, finding a breakfast spot, I told myself to be prepared for whatever happened. Again, I was being stupid and putting myself in harm’s way. But my gut was telling me that this man wouldn’t pay a ‘G’ every time he saw me just to eventually kill me. Why pay to kill me or hurt me when he could have done it for free and gotten it over with the first time that we were alone at the hotel?
When I looked over in the driver’s side into those eyes hiding under that fitted cap, I saw the same confusion in his eyes that was in my heart. Just as I didn’t understand what he was doing with me, I don’t think he understood why he was with me either.
I assumed that the money just helped him feel like he was just fucking me, paying a whore, and not stupidly fucking with me again.
When we arrived at a truck stop that I was familiar with, because he’d taken me there so many times when we were dating, he told me to stay in the truck. That proved it right there. He was ashamed of being seen with me, and that was rightfully so. Hell, I set him up. He heard the testimony that I didn’t want to be involved in the robbery, really liked him, and was pressured into doing it. The hood hadn’t heard that though. For all I knew, his whole crew and hood thought that I was a cruel bitch that set him up and laid in his bed while my crew killed his friend.
Good Girls Ain't No Fun Boxed Set (The SIX romance and urban fiction volumes of the LOVE, SEX, LIES series) Page 96