by Adair, Mary
“Tell me of the reason for sickness?” New Moon quizzed and instructed Dawn on the ways of the Cherokee.
Golden Dawn tilted her head to one side, thinking as her basket continued to grow, “The evil spirits, Anisgi'na, affect a body. Something that person has done was impure, or has invited impurity into their life.”
“And who can be said to take the spirit of those who have lost their purity?”
“The spider entangles them and their souls are pulled away toward the darkening land.”
New Moon made to continue this line of thought. Dawn noticed a sudden moment of weakness when Moon’s breath caught in her throat, as she seemed to perceive the subject. Dawn had to agree, it felt ominous to talk of death and illness while they both worried about Panther. Dawn’s worry over her father’s absence had torn at her stomach like a wild animal trying to get out.
“What are some of the sources of dye in making a basket?” Moon changed her questioning.
Raven nodded in his doze, glad of the change of topic as well. It was relaxing to be around those he could trust without any pretense or worry, and the talk of illness had been leading him to tense up unconsciously. His thoughts were becoming troubled, following a well-trod path of question about his purpose and place. He opened his eyes, watching the two weaving their baskets.
Moon had married a white man, and Dawn was a half-breed like himself. The principal people were his brethren, those he felt closest to as a people, but they seemed to judge him constantly. Colonists and Europeans were easier for him to get along with, but they seemed to distrust him or simply could not understand how to treat him.
None of that was present with New Moon or Golden Dawn. Both had similar paths in life to his. As little as he would have liked to admit it, Panther's absence helped. That man was so hard to emulate, standards incredibly high and abilities so intimidating. Mistakes felt like failure beneath such a watchful gaze.
He rubbed his face, interrupting the talk of dyes, “New Moon, would you say that I am one of the people?”
Moon looked up from her basket, and stared straight into Raven's eyes. The barest hint of a frown crossed her features. She turned her gaze back to the work, “Why is it that you look for others to answer the question of where you belong?”
Raven grunted, “Why is it that you answer my every question with a question of your own?”
She shook her head, hiding her mirth, “Apparently you intend to do the same to me.” Raven noticed how Moon tilted her head at Dawn, warning the girl's twinkling eyes not to laugh, “Yet, I ask you only questions that you already have an answer to. You will more likely believe yourself than anyone else. If I give you an answer, you will question it. If you give yourself an answer, you have decided on your own truth.”
“You and Panther always give me the same responses, yet I am no closer to finding this great answer you speak of.” He stood, careful not to disturb Little Fox. He suddenly felt restless as the relaxation from before evaporated, “I have been over the ocean, through towns in England, and through the woods of Virginia, Carolina, to Louisiana. I have not yet found any answers, let alone one that will satisfy my heart.” His fists clenched, and he turned to go.
Moon's amusement disappeared, and she had to put a hand on Dawn's knee to prevent the girl from standing, “Raven Who Flies To Meet The Clouds, be at peace with yourself, first. Above all else, find that peace.”
Raven stopped at the doorway, exhaling slowly. Over his shoulder, he spoke with resignation as he stepped outside, “I am trying.”
New Moon turned to Dawn. “You are free to ask the questions that have been tugging at your spirit.”
Dawn was not surprised by her mother’s statement. Her mother knew her as well as she knew herself. “You saw Father in a vision before he came to the village.” She glanced up at New Moon who smiled patiently.
“Yes.”
“Was that dream the reason my uncle did not request Father be adopted by the Wolf Clan?”
“If Panther were adopted into the Wolf Clan he would not be your father now.” New Moon set her basket aside. “I have long past explained to you why members of the same clan cannot be joined? But…knowing is not always understanding.”
“I understand, Mother. My question is why was Little Buffalo not adopted by Father’s Anisahoni Clan or by your clan, the Wolf Clan?”
New Moon looked at her daughter and Dawn saw the soft black eyes that had comforted her all her life tear up. A small tear escape Moon’s left eye. With a gentle touch, Dawn reached up and wiped the tear away with the back of her finger. “You had a dream. You told the dream to Dancing Cloud and though you refused to see the truth in the message, my uncle understood. Am I not right?”
“You are right, my little one and you are wise…, and you have inherited my gift of dream visions. Am I not right?”
“You are right, Mother. I have dreamed.”
***
In the evening, Raven Cloud stepped out of the village to go to water with thoughts no clearer than earlier. He had hoped to spend the day restfully lounging, but inner turmoil had kept him busy pacing the village in thought. After leaving the gate, he broke into a run, freeing his mind to the physical task.
Instead of taking as direct a path as possible to the cove, Raven sprinted through the forest with abandon. He pushed himself, straining at the limits of his speed and endurance. Questions echoed through his mind that he could not answer.
Panther's extended absence had him wondering about his true father. Raven's childhood need for that figure had been minimal. Men at the trading post had helped him develop as a child, and Panther had taken over completely after the move to Chota Town. As Little Buffalo, he had idolized the one-time Colonel and great warrior. That man had led him to learn the ways of the Principal People, had taught him to be a man.
Now, as he ran, he began to feel a great debt toward Red Panther. That debt felt impossible to repay, and suddenly a new anger arose toward the father that he had never known. It fueled him, urging him into another sprint among the trees. The night was cool, and it kept him running longer than he had intended. Deep into the wood, his purpose beyond the walls remembered, the paths took him back to the hidden pool of water among boulders.
Tossing aside his breechcloth, he plunged into the water headfirst. It was cold, though it seemed to grant him a comforting clarity. He spoke words of ceremony for the hunt, and then swam. Floating on his back, he stared up into the darkening sky. Wispy clouds of white were wrapped in gold and red. Hints of purple lined the airy tufts. To the east, faint pinpoints of light were already shining down against deep blue.
As soon as he stopped thinking about all of his questions, his distress left him. The first hints of understanding whispered to him, but the sound of approaching footsteps brought him out of his state of serenity.
Farthest Running Antelope stepped into the water slowly, wading out until the water covered his shoulders. He disappeared beneath the surface. Rising up again, he spoke the hunt's word. Solemn moments passed, and then he nodded to his friend, “I am going with you tomorrow. We will enjoy a fast hunt.”
Raven Cloud moved to the side of the pool. He was chasing the fleeting thoughts, sensing their importance, “It will be a good hunt, yes. We should be able to keep a quick pace. All who are going are strong runners.”
Antelope nodded, “Yes, though none quiet as fast as me…” he made a dramatic gesture with his hand, “and you, of course.” His laugh echoed off the boulders around them, “I think some of the others are offended that you have returned, so quickly they've lost stature in how they measure up.”
Cloud made a noncommittal shrug, “I have given them little to measure. I left no mark here and have yet to make any new one.”
“Perhaps, but you have grown well, and they see that. Do you doubt your ability?”
Another shrug and the half-breed turned to look back to the stars, “I know what I can do, and where I have grown strong. Still, even
a fine gun may explode the first time it fires. I am as unproven as that weapon, you know this.”
Antelope shook his head, already stepping from the water, “You treat yourself with a harshness usually reserved for a terrible enemy.” Strapping his breechcloth back on, the young man crouched down, sitting on his heels, “You earned your new name. You have shown yourself as quick, strong, and dependable.”
Raven took a moment to get out as well, replacing his own scant clothing, “And yet I was still sent away, and I have lost much of what I gained before leaving.”
Antelope rose and put a hand on his friend's shoulder, “Do you think that we all reach some cliff from which there is no greater height to climb? Am I to be expectant of constant respect since I am no longer Runs Far? Or, instead, do I expect nothing while trusting in myself that I will do as best as I can?”
Stepping away, the hand dropped from Raven's shoulder, “We all do our best, I know that.” Raven said as he ran is fingers through his wet hair pushing it back from his face. “Life is a struggle with constant challenge. None deny that.”
“Yet here you are, unable to see. You are a strong warrior, and the village knows it.” Antelope gently scolded his friend.
Raven Cloud made his way to the entrance of the enclosure of boulders, “You say this, but I know that I must prove to be what you believe to be true. But come, we talk too much, and our next day will be long.”
The duo made their way from the cove, breaking into a run that became a race. Farthest Running Antelope made it back to the gate first, but the distance between the two was in inches.
Chapter Five
In the morning, a hunting group of six set out in high spirits. Many from the village stood near the village entrance to watch them go and wish them well. It was to be the first hunt for two boys aged 12 and 13. An older hunter was with them as well, Climbing Bear, the uncle for the boys who oversaw their training personally. As part of a lesson, Raven was to be in charge of the overall hunt.
Whooping and elated calls followed the hunters as they approached the entrance. As they ran out the gate, all six fell into the strict silence required of them. The pace quickened dramatically too, with Raven taking the lead and pushing them all to maintain one speed.
Raven was happy to find the run easy to him, and kept a watchful eye on the boys to ensure that neither fell back nor stumbled. He noticed that the uncle had a strap looped about his waist above the breechcloth, understanding it to be the means by which the man would correct the two youngest of the group. A quick snap from the leather would keep the new hunters in line.
All day they ran, pausing only shortly to check trails and consider signs of game. They were not tracking anything yet, but keeping to areas that would suit them best for the following day. Admirably, the boys kept up throughout their loping movement among the trees and hills. Raven timed his breaks carefully to check for signs of game, thinking it a good way to give the youngest two a rest without showing that he was doing so and diminishing their honor.
As the evening wore on, the entire group was nearly sprinting at the end of their day's travel. Everyone, even Antelope, seemed as if he felt the test of endurance. The boys had grimly set jaws and narrowed eyes. Finally, Raven signaled their halt as they filed into a narrow draw in the shadow of a steep hill. A stream gurgled to meet them, and they followed this until they reached a small waterfall. Here, next to the fall's small pool, they made camp.
Sunset painted the forested hill in crimson and shadow. Gentle gusts tumbled leaves through the air and scattered the waterfall in small bursts of spray. Each of the troupe took turns dipping into the shallow pool, curling themselves up so that the water covered them completely.
Raven did this with a feeling of calm that stunned him. The ceremony in the depths was coming to mean much, for nowhere else had he gained so much insight into his internal dilemma. Words touched his lips in whisper, “Give me the wind, give me the breeze...”
After all completed the rituals they built a fire and all happily gathered around to enjoy its warmth. None would admit it, but the night was cool and the water had chilled them. They ate supper, a welcome meal after fasting since the night before. Finally, the meal was finished, the fire banked. Then, everyone, tired from the day's activity, rubbed its ash on his chest in preparation for the night.
At daybreak, everyone got up expectant and restless. They returned their campsite to the land as much as possible, and Raven took the lead once more. This time, the pace was much slower, a stalking walk up the hill with frequent stops to check for spoor and other sign.
When they found a deer, each knew their attack would take place without hesitation. As part of challenging the developing warriors, the hunt would be carried out without weapons. They would corner one of the animals carefully and come together as a group to subdue it. Ideally, such a task would take place upon a young buck or a smaller doe.
Thankfully, they had found a small group of deer without alerting the animals to any human presence. The youngest boy was chosen to stalk a small doe, assigning him the task of creeping as close as possible to their prey.
Though the moment was crucial, Raven had been distracted. Movement caught his eye in the woods, and a figure that looked human disappeared behind a tree. Gritting his teeth in frustration, he went to investigate this potential threat. With Panther missing, and reports of mercenaries possibly being in the area, he would forgo the hunt in the off chance that there was danger. He gestured for Bear to take over the group.
All direction and instruction was carried out in silence. The boy did his part as Climbing Bear gave signal, and the rest of the hunters crept around the deer, spreading into a circle that would surround all of the creatures. Remaining deathly quiet, it would be up to the one boy to signal when the rest would jump forward for the final attack.
Though he was only 12, the youngest was careful yet quick. He praised the winds for sending the deer's scent to him and not the other way around. Every time one of the deer even flicked an ear, his body went rigid. After stopping and starting a hundred times, the doe was nearly an arm's length away. The moment had arrived, and the boy sprang with a mighty kick of his legs. His leap was true. Strong arms and hands shot around the deer and clenched its underbelly.
The deer scattered. They sprang forward like oil skittering across a hot pan. All of the hunters ran forward, ignoring the other animals and closing in on the one. Now it was only a matter of holding it down and killing it. Though stumbling from the boy's weight, it was still zigzagging through the woods. Helpfully, it was slowed drastically both by its panic and the captor's grip.
Antelope reached the deer first, then Bear and the other young boy. The rest of the group closed in as well. Each of the hunters grabbed hold of a leg, or the neck, or just a handhold of fur and skin. Seconds after the youngest hunter leapt, the animal was subdued.
Climbing Bear handed the youngest his knife, trading places with the boy to hold the beast from bucking away. Confidently, the triumphant boy grabbed the back of the doe's neck, murmuring words of thanks with a glance upward, “Oh Great Terrestrial Hunter.”
The young brave offered up prayer to the Great Spirit and thanked the creature for its sacrifice to bring food for the village. Then he honored the dear by ending its life in the manor all young braves are taught. The prayers of thanksgiving and honor to the deer is a sacred and necessary act that the young brave performed with great respect.
With the creature dead, they made camp where they had felled it. The fire built, they fed a piece of the deer's tongue to the flames. All were talking about the hunt, and speaking on everyone's contribution to a successful kill. The mood was lighthearted and triumphant. They noticed Raven was missing, but had seen him stalking something else toward a thicker grove of trees.
Bear had waved the others away from following, “Let him go, we must attend to the kill.”
Raven Cloud was far from the group. Creeping along, he snuck up on the perso
n hiding nearby. After he caught a second flash of movement, he knew someone was spying on them. Suddenly, he heard the faint snap of a careless footfall in the wrong place. The twig gave away the other's position. Instantly, he sprinted toward the sound, drawing his knife.
Rounding a large, ancient tree, he raised his blade to strike.
“Buffalo, no, stop!” Golden Dawn raised her arm in defense, eyes wide as she looked up from a crouched position on the ground.
Raven gaped, lowering his weapon, “Golden Dawn. What are you doing out here? What madness persuaded you to follow a hunt?” Dawn stared at the ground, forcing her face to remain expressionless as she hid the shame and anger she felt. They had not even seen her, or heard her. She had kept silent, had kept out of sight, and there would not be a single word of praise for any of her abilities to remain hidden.
Struggling to control her voice, she answered, “I wanted to practice. I wanted to try my own hand at being on the hunt.”
“And New Moon, does she know you are out here? Will she be worried for you, wondering what has become of her daughter?”
Dawn realized her Buffalo fought to control his anger. Never before had he shown real anger at any of her reckless escapades. Buffalo’s anger with her caused her pain as no punishment could.
Her head sunk lower, “I told her I was going to gather items for dying baskets. She did not know I'd be gone for more than the afternoon, let alone several days.”
Raven reached out, taking Dawn's hand and pulling so that she would rise to her feet. He jerked his head back toward the group, “Come, we will show them your presence, and then I am taking you back to Chota Town before you are missed any longer.”
As the two approached the fire Dawn noticed nearly everyone showed at least a bit of shock at the presence of New Moon's daughter. Anger showed in their gazes as well. Each looked away openly ignoring her.