Love Starts With Z

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Love Starts With Z Page 18

by Tera Shanley


  “Soren?” Kaegan asked, cocking a dark eyebrow as if he already knew her answer.

  Ben. Ben hadn’t done anything wrong, just been in the path of Mark’s insatiable wrath, and now he lay cold in the woods somewhere. They’d all be dead if he’d had his way. Every drop of blood that seeped from Kaegan’s wound filled her with vengeance, black and bottomless. She dragged her gaze away from the fire in Kaegan’s eyes to meet Mark’s. “I don’t eat dog meat.”

  Before he could respond, Kaegan shoved a wad of gauze in Mark’s mouth, then tied a bandage around his head until the only noise that came from the man was muffled yelling. He struggled, but Colten stepped forward and held him firm.

  Steady tears made tracks down Lauren’s face, but she stood stoically, gun limp in her hand. Whatever she and Mark had been, she didn’t move to defend him now.

  Kaegan dragged Mark by the collar until he reached the edge of the dull firelight. “Soren,” he said gruffly, “I can handle a lot of things, but I can’t handle being away from you right now. Could you please come with us?”

  She stood and followed behind Colten, boots crunching through the leaves. Lauren and Adrianna followed closely behind her. Splitting up now that their numbers were dwindling suddenly seemed like a terrible idea.

  Kaegan picked a wide tree near the creek. He and Colten tied Mark as if he were hugging the trunk, doubling up on the rope in case he rubbed one free on the rough bark.

  Lauren turned away, and Soren wrapped an arm around her shoulder as they made their way to Ben’s still body. The moonlight reflected off the shallow waves and illuminated his face in tones of soft blue.

  Soren sank to her knees beside him. It wasn’t fair. She hadn’t known him that long, but he should’ve gone to war with them and died honorably, not been snuffed out by some messed up revenge trip that had nothing to do with him and everything to do with her. His death was on her. She didn’t hit him over the head, would never hurt him, but she’d taunted Mark, and Ben had become collateral damage during his rage. Lauren covered her face with her hands, and her shoulders shook with quiet weeping. Soren held her close, resting her muzzled chin on her shoulder.

  The rhythmic snick, snick of the handheld shovel sounded behind them as the boys dug a grave for Ben.

  Adrianna stood by the creek, watching the water flow by. It was her way. She wasn’t good at farewells.

  Silently, Kaegan and Colten lifted Ben’s body and set him in his final resting place. Adrianna found a large river rock and placed it as a marker at the head of the grave and one by one, they touched it and trailed back toward camp.

  As they passed Mark, Kaegan followed through on his promise, pulling his machete and cutting into his forearm until it ran red.

  For the first time in her life, the smell of fresh blood wasn’t enticing. Now it turned her stomach. Tonight never should’ve happened.

  Colten dropped back, waited for her to catch up, and slipped an arm around her shoulders. Leaning his temple against hers in a move that shocked her to her bones, he whispered, “I saw what you did back at camp. You went after the gun pointed at me instead of the one that would’ve saved you, and that says something about the type of person you are. I’m sorry I stabbed you when I first met you, and even if we die out here, I’m glad I got the chance to know you.” He reached back and unclipped the muzzle. “Don’t wear this anymore. It upsets Kaegan, and he’s struggling enough with all of this. Hell, I can’t stand to see it on you anymore either. You aren’t a monster, Soren. People like Mark are the ones who deserve to be muzzled.”

  Perhaps her emotions had been amplified with the loss of Ben, but the streaming tears down her cheeks were all Colten’s doing.

  He brushed a knuckle across her damp lashes, his smile white in the moonlight. “I’m still calling you Z, though.”

  She laughed thickly and nodded. “I don’t think I hate it so much anymore.”

  Chapter Eighteen

  KAEGAN WATCHED HER and Colten with an unfathomable expression, and Soren slipped her hand into his when they caught up.

  Colten stoked the fire when they arrived back at camp, and the glow lit the woods, flickering off tree trunks and brush. The first aid kit was in Adrianna’s satchel, and she handed it to Soren without her asking. Kaegan’s face was a gory mess, and they didn’t need the smell attracting things that went bump in the night.

  “Come on, sit down,” she said, gesturing to the dark side of a large evergreen.

  Grunting, he slid down against it and sighed heavily. He wouldn’t meet her eyes, so she straddled him and cupped his cheeks. “Mark’s death isn’t one that you should carry. He killed Ben. He would’ve killed all of us.”

  He blinked slowly, drawing his dawn gray eyes to hers. “I should’ve seen it coming.”

  “You did. You took the firing pin from his favorite weapon. Kaegan, you saved us.”

  “No, I should’ve seen the ambush by the creek. Ben had gone quiet, but I just thought he shoved off for a piss. He was dying instead.” He hissed as she dabbed the gash on his head with a cloth she’d doused with canteen water. “He hit me with a branch. Looked like he used the same one on Ben. I think I only blacked out for a minute, and when I woke up, I tried to revive Ben, but his face—”

  “I know. I saw it.” She wished she hadn’t, wished there was a way to erase the memory from her mind, but it was there, bright and unavoidable. Maybe it was a good thing she didn’t dream.

  Brushing his finger down her jaw, he whispered, “You did good. I saw you fight Mark.”

  “He still bested me.”

  “Only because you were focused on protecting the others. You were beautiful. Lethal. But when Mark pulled the trigger against your head, it did something awful to me.” His voice trembled. “I wanted to rip his head from his body with my bare hands for trying to hurt you.”

  The firelight on the other side of the tree cast quivering shadows across the woods as the others prepared for sleep. One half of Kaegan’s face was illuminated in the soft glow, enough for her to see the hunger that churned in his eyes as he dropped his gaze to her lips.

  “I want to kiss you so bad, sometimes I can’t think of anything else,” Kaegan said, focusing on her parted lips.

  It was hard to breathe, hard to think when he looked at her like that. As if he were hurting and the only thing that could relieve the pain was the taste of her. She lifted a curved, threaded needle to his wound, but he grabbed her hand and shook his head.

  He gripped her waist so tight, his fingers dug into her flesh as he pulled her forward until she was crushed to his hips. Even through the thick canvass of her pants, she could feel his rising excitement against her.

  “I’ve worried half my life that I’d never find someone to match me,” he rasped. “I was scared I’d walk the earth alone and never really be affected by anyone, and then I saw you, and now I don’t even feel like the same man anymore. You’re different, deeper. And the more I’m around you, the more I want to be different too. My life is yours, Soren. My body, it’s yours. I trust you with all of it.”

  She kissed his neck lightly and whispered against it, “My body is yours too, Kaegan, just not my lips. I’ll get the muzzle.”

  “Don’t,” he said through gritted teeth. The tree was wide, and the team had settled near the fire. The murmur of their conversation had died until it felt like they were alone with the wind.

  “What do you want from me?” she asked.

  “Tonight, I don’t want anything from you.” Slowly, he untied the leather string of her pants, loosened them until they lay open.

  Glancing around, she said, “We can’t do this here.”

  Pulling her close until her chest brushed his, he slid his hand down the front of her, cupping her, silencing her denial as the warmth of his hand met the wet heat he’d created with the intensity of his admissions. Her body hummed as she wrapped her arms around his neck. She could never be close enough to him, and as he slid a long finger inside of her,
she gripped his shirt and stifled a groan of ecstasy. Rocking against his touch, she set the pace, slow and languid at first, but faster as tension filled her. He nibbled on her neck, sucked and kissed in turn, and as climax built, he pulled her tighter and tighter against him until there was no ending to her and no beginning to him. His arms flexed and shook, his breath trembled against her neck, and she bit her lip against the scream building in her throat. She shattered, and the only thing holding her together was Kaegan’s embrace.

  “Kaegan, Kaegan, Kaegan,” she breathed as she buried her face in his shoulder.

  A deep chuckle filled the quiet night and he eased her back. “Don’t hide it from me, love. I want to see the face you make when I touch you.”

  She tried to steady her breathing, but anything more than simply existing seemed impossible. The smile dipped from his face as he studied her, and by the time he slid out of her, she was no better than mud in his hands.

  God bless that man, he tightened and tied her trousers when her fingers didn’t seem to want to work and then pulled her beside him into the shelter of his arm. Cocking his head, he said, “I like the way you say my name.”

  She smiled into the darkness, heat flooding her until it reached the tips of her ears as the shudder of aftershocks pulsed against where he’d caressed her.

  “I was afraid…” he started. “I was worried you wouldn’t be able to feel anything inside of you either. Since you don’t feel pain, I didn’t know what pleasure would be like for you.”

  Pursing her lips against a smile of pure satisfaction that threatened to take over her entire face, she snuggled against his ribs. “Pleasure won’t be a problem for us.”

  His lips were warm as they pressed against her hair. “Good.”

  Kaegan lay below Soren at the base of the tree, on a worn blanket with his go-bag propped under his neck like a pillow. He was on his side, with his arms crossed in front of him as if he were cold, but when she searched for gooseflesh on his skin, she could find none.

  Maybe she should put her blanket over him. She was lookout tonight, so she wouldn’t need it. No, she was just obsessing. He was fine, and if she covered him up, he’d only wake. Even in his sleep he looked exhausted, or haunted, or maybe a disturbing combination of the two. She could tell being with her had only been a temporary escape, and that his thoughts had drawn inward, to Ben, when he sat beside the campfire to eat the leftover dinner that had been warming there. His silence was deafening as she’d searched for something to say to take the burn of Ben’s loss from their shoulders.

  No, she wouldn’t risk waking him. He needed the rest as much as the others did.

  Dragging her gaze away from his sleeping form to the moonlit forest, she leaned back against the trunk of the tree she’d scaled for a better vantage point. Frogs croaked, but it was an unusual sound. Sometimes it was akin to screaming, and at first it had rattled her. And why wouldn’t it after the long night the team had? But time healed all, and in this case, settled all, and she had grown used to the screaming frogs as the hours dragged on.

  In a few hours’ time, it would be dawn, and they could break camp and escape the haunted woods where they’d lost a chunk of their team to betrayal. The urge to hurry from this place was so thick it was almost tangible.

  Movement caught her eye, and she squinted, waiting for her eyes to adjust to the darkness below.

  Another blurred movement, but this time, she caught a flash of brown fur. The dog was back.

  They’d discussed a name for him. Lauren had written Maynard on her board, and when Soren had agreed it was the perfect name for him, Colten started calling him Nards for short, so they re-cast their votes. Instead, his name was now Max.

  She climbed down the tree and dug a piece of dried venison from Adrianna’s satchel. Slowly, she approached with her offering, but Max didn’t seem interested in food at the moment. He slunk back and forth, tail tucked.

  Soren frowned and cocked her head. Maybe he was agitated by the Deads Mark had likely attracted near the creek. “They’re far enough away they won’t pay attention to us tonight, Max,” she said soothingly.

  A high pitched whine wrenched from his throat as he looked behind him and jumped at some disturbance beyond her senses. A twig snapped and Max bolted.

  Drawing her battle sword, she listened for a groan, a shuffle, anything that would point her in the right direction. She didn’t smell Deads, and she should at this short a distance. She wrinkled her nose and sniffed, but still nothing.

  As quietly as she could, she crept through the woods in the direction of that small ruckus. It was probably an animal. A rabbit or deer. Even a boar, perhaps.

  The camp was far enough away she could barely make out the fire. It was nothing. She scanned the woods, but everything was still and quiet except for the screaming frogs.

  “Geez, Mitchell,” she muttered. “Get ahold of yourself.”

  As she turned, she ran into a solid wall of muscle. A man with a tattoo across the side of his face gave her a cold smile, and then threw a black bag over her face before she could scream. She fought like a wild, injured animal, but as soon as she thought she’d made ground, the crack of her skull sounded like gunfire in her ear.

  A dull ache spread from her temple to behind her eye, and her legs seized and refused to work.

  This was it. This was the part where she died.

  Chapter Nineteen

  ADRIANNA’S CURSING WOKE KAEGAN UP from a deep sleep. Dawn had broken the horizon, and the sun now hung heavy in the eastern sky. He would’ve been more concerned with the late hour if it wasn’t for Mark-the-Dead, standing at the edge of a branch Adrianna was pushing on.

  “Hurry up, Colten,” she groused.

  Colten rubbed his eyes sleepily, yawned, and pulled his machete. One languid thrust and Mark fell to his knees, limp but propped on the branch. The ropes still hung from his wrists, and Colten lifted one up to examine it. “Son of a bitch, someone cut these.”

  Kaegan looked around, the feeling of unease pushing him to action. “Soren?”

  The morning light sifted through the trees, leaving the ground speckled around him. Leaves lazily rustled in the wind and branches swayed. Nothing more.

  Adrianna dropped the branch and yelled, “Soren! Where are you?”

  “Why would Soren cut Mark free?” Colten asked, still staring at the sliced rope.

  “She didn’t,” he said bolting for the woods. “Someone else did, and I bet this has something to do with that kid we saw in the woods yesterday.”

  Turning around and around, he searched the woods. Damn it! Where was she? No way in hell would she let Mark slip past her when she was on watch. Dread slammed into him like a glacier, and his chest constricted until it was hard to breathe. She was gone. Every instinct in his body screamed it was so, but still, he searched the woods.

  A flash of brown ran between two trees, and he pulled his gun and aimed.

  “Don’t,” Colten warned. “It’s just Max. Don’t waste your ammo on him.”

  Kaegan lowered his weapon as the mutt slunk from the tree he’d hid behind and sniffed at something on the ground. He looked up and then sniffed again, repeating the gesture until Kaegan surged forward. The dog had found something.

  Skidding to a stop, he brushed leaves away from a single curved blade in the dirt, the smaller of the pair Soren carried on her back. The ground was torn up, like she’d fought, and branches had been snapped where something big had been dragged away.

  “Pack camp fast,” Kaegan breathed. “They could have hours on us.”

  He stared in horror at the fallen blade as Colten sprinted for camp. He didn’t matter without her. Nothing did. She was everything good, and now she was in danger. He wouldn’t, couldn’t believe her already dead. His heart would’ve felt it if she didn’t exist anymore.

  “Hold on, Soren. We’re coming for you,” he breathed.

  “Check its back. Does it have wings?” a man asked from somewhere far off.


  Opening her eyes made her want to retch, so she pulled her knees up to her chest and tried to stay asleep instead.

  Rough hands pulled at her shirt, and she gasped. A shrill and constant noise rang against her eardrum, irritating and grating. A breeze caressed the bare skin of her back, and a calloused hand rubbed down the length of it. Not Kaegan’s hand.

  Squinting against blinding sunlight, her cheek brushed against splintered wood as she tried to turn her head. Light streamed in through a crude, glassless window, and large, untied boots echoed across the floorboards in front of her face. She tried to rub her temple, but her hands seemed to be tied behind her back.

  “Where am I?” she asked softly, so as not to add to the shrill alarm rattling her brain.

  The man with the tattooed face leaned down in front of her and smiled, exposing two missing teeth in front. “Well, darlin’, you’re in hell. That’s where you are. Don’t worry yourself none though. You won’t be here for long.”

  Thank goodness for small blessings. If she had to exist in the cloud of that man’s fetid breath much longer, she’d lose her sense of smell.

  “’Cause we’re going to kill you,” he clarified.

  Oh.

  “Can you tell whomever is rubbing my back to lay off?” she asked sweetly. “I’m not a fucking kitten.”

  “What are you?” the man behind her asked.

  Soren gritted her teeth. If they wanted answers, she wasn’t giving them lying down and vulnerable to their groping.

  Tattoo Face yanked her into a sitting position and dragged her backward until she leaned against a wall. “If you’re smart, you’ll answer Bossman. Or,” he said, pulling a knife from his belt, “I can start cutting off fingers until you talk.”

  She wouldn’t exactly feel that, nor was it likely to entice her to talk, but he didn’t have to know that.

  Bossman wore hunting garb, and his camouflaged boots squeaked as he knelt. Intense, dark eyes studied her like she was a lab rat.

 

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