With that, he turned and left without a look back. I sat wide-eyed watching him go, not fully comfortable with what had just happened. Even though I didn't feel the same revulsion I had felt before, I still rubbed my cheek as if to wash away his touch.
After I got myself bandaged up and the blue rags discarded, I slipped on the fresh white t-shirt. It was big on me, and I felt a moment of awkwardness knowing it was Hawk's, but the fact remained that it was clean and I was dressed again.
Afraid to leave, I wandered around his messy room. Laid out the same as mine, this one didn't have the window boarded up and it was open to let in a breeze. A picture sat on the dresser, featuring a younger version of Hawk, a girl that bore a striking resemblance to him, an older woman, and a frisky German Shepard. It was a window back to another time.
I picked up the frame, deciding to snoop. I was curious about any clue that might give some insight into Hawk. Flipping open the clasps of the frame, I pulled the picture out to see if anything was written on it. I was rewarded with a spidery scrawl that named them all. Ryan, Stacy, Grandma Helen, and Brownie.
I sighed as I finished my examination and put the picture back in its place. Other than figuring out his first name, the picture only hinted at memories of people likely long dead. Now I felt guilty for intruding.
With nothing else to do but worry, I stared out the window. This window looked out into a little courtyard and it was the first time I realized the hotel was a giant square. On the other side of the courtyard, past goats and sheep, stood the other half of the building. The place was massive. There was no way I could go out on my own and hope to stumble across Joss.
As the afternoon wore on, I began to pace as my ankle allowed. Luckily, it seemed I had just twisted it in the fall and hadn't done any real damage to it. As the sun began to set, I became increasingly nervous that Hawk still had not come by to check on me. I wondered if I had been missed yet.
Finally, as the sun started to sink beyond the rooftops, Hawk rushed back into the room. I nearly jumped out my chair as he slammed the door behind him. He was sweating profusely, his right eye was black and swollen, and his lip was cut.
"You have to leave tonight." He said, coming to stand in front of me.
"What happened?" I gasped. "Are you okay?"
"What, this?" He chuckled and managed a smirk. "It's nothing. Should see the other guy."
I scoffed as I crossed my arms over my chest.
"Look, you've got other things to worry about right now. This will heal." His face turned serious again as he gave me the news. "Reed is crazed right now. In the past week, we've managed to kill all of his main supporters. He doesn't know where you are, but it won't take him long to figure it out. As soon as he does, he'll know I'm against him."
The look of worry that crossed his face forced me to ask him, "If you've been against him, why did you stay here for so long?"
His shoulders slumped and he seemed defeated. Maybe even a little ashamed. "Reed did the same thing to me that he's been doing to you, holding a loved one to keep me in line."
"Who?" I asked gently.
"My Grandmother. She's the only family I have left. I never gave Reed a reason not to trust me. He actually came here with me to save her. Then something inside him snapped and things disintegrated to this." He threw his hands in the air in a dramatic gesture, and then let them fall limply to his sides.
I wanted to reach out to him, to comfort him, but didn't know how. Instead, I stood there uncomfortably, waiting, staring at his swollen face. Taking a moment to compose himself, Hawk rubbed a hand across his forehead and winced as he brushed past his tender eye. He shook it off as he led me to the window.
Pointing across the courtyard, he said. "Tonight, Sal will be guarding that door. Dark hair, round guy. He'll wave from that window when it's clear. Get through the courtyard, and once you're in the other side, just go straight on through. Cross the parking lot to a side street called Janeway. Follow that north for two blocks and there'll be a white house with red shutters on the corner. In that backyard is a shed with all the stuff that Tristan and I could smuggle out of here. Joss should be waiting for you there."
I turned worried eyes up to him. "What's going to happen here?"
He sighed as he leaned against the windowsill. "I don't know for sure. The ball's in motion now though. There's no going back. Hopefully Tristan's got everyone evacuated upstairs already.
"Look, if we manage to do this, the men here will scatter. Don't trust anyone you meet out there. Head to Vegas. It's still pretty much overrun with red-eyes. No one is going to follow you in there."
"Except Reed." I said.
He reached out and squeezed my hand. "Except Reed." He answered.
I took a deep breath before speaking, squeezing his hand in return. "Thank you, Ryan."
His head snapped up as his hazel eyes fixed on me. "It's been a long time since anyone's called me that."
"Sounds better than Hawk." I shrugged.
Again, he watched me intently for several moments before he smirked and nodded. "I guess so."
I looked down, unable to meet his gaze any longer.
"I need to get out there again." He continued, still holding my hand in his. "Thank you, Ali." He said, pulling my hand up to his lips. "Good luck." He kissed the backs of my fingers, then released me and backed away.
"You too." I mumbled after him as he left.
~ ~ ~ ~
Every minute I had to wait for the sun to go down was torment. I was worried about Joss and my own escape, and occasionally the odd thought of Ryan would flit across my mind. I wondered if I would see him again before I left. It felt odd to even care.
As the darkness grew, I didn't dare light the lantern in the room. The light could draw unwanted attention from the guard outside. Instead, I pulled the chair up to the window and waited in the dark.
It seemed like hours passed when I finally saw another man walk up to start a conversation with the guard on duty. I guessed he was who Ryan had described. I waited anxiously for them to finish talking, and was planning to slip out the window as soon as I got the sign.
My attention was so fully on the scene across the courtyard that I almost missed the sound of the door opening. As soon as I registered the click of the latch, I spun from my chair, my heart instantly pounding in my chest. The man stood silently in the hallway, shrouded by shadows.
Softly, I called out. "Ryan?"
I hoped it would be him, slipping back into the room for a final goodbye, but the goodbye had already been said. I knew it wasn't Ryan. Something inside me sensed who it was before he ever spoke.
"I trusted him." The cold, emotionless voice sent chills down my spine. "And he betrayed me."
The flare of a match sparked light into the room, and he lit the lantern that had been sitting on Ryan's desk. Reed's single eye glittered with hatred as he turned to me.
"You had to come and ruin it all, didn't you?" He spat, and I trembled. I knew I could fight back now, though. Joss was gone. He was safely away from here.
"I never asked to come here." I bit back, bending over to pull my skinning knife from my boot. "You're getting what you deserve."
"I never deserved this!" He shouted, spittle flying from his mouth. The intensity of his sudden anger was just a glimpse at how unstable he was. He failed to notice the knife in my hand. His focus was far beyond me. "I was trying to keep everyone alive. Keep everyone safe."
"Funny way to do that." I grumbled when he fell silent. He shook, barely keeping his anger reigned in, and I did my best to prepare for his attack. It was hopeless trying to steady my hands from shaking. Fear leaked through me.
"You have no idea how hard it is to run a place like this. To keep everyone happy. To keep everyone fed, and to never get a thank you for it." He grumbled. "Those sluts deserved to be thrown in the pits. Always whining, always wanting more. They got what they deserved.
"My men worked hard to protect them. They were never
shown any gratitude. I made sure they were rewarded." He paced a small circle, walking back and forth as he rambled. My stomach turned.
In one second he was standing there, looking sane. In the next, his face twisted and he was lunging at me. His hands raised to catch me by my throat.
Knowing he was going to attack and being ready for it was not the same thing. He still caught me off guard. At the last second, I dropped into a crouch, barely escaping his flailing hands. He still managed to tangle them in my hair again, and as soon as I felt the tug, I became enraged. It overpowered my fear.
Not again! The thought reverberated through me, and I wasn't sure if I had actually screamed it out loud or if it was only in my mind. I attacked frantically, crazed by panic and the want to escape him. I stabbed at his arms, cutting into flesh and drawing blood. It splattered against the walls as he spun away from me, abandoning his attack as he examined the fresh blood spilling from new wounds.
I’d fought him off, but my ankle screamed at me in protest and my wounded shoulder weakened me to the point I could barely grip the small knife. I passed it to my left hand, but I knew my chances of fighting him off a second time were grim.
"So you're not as defenseless as you portrayed earlier." He said calmly. All traces of anger vanished. He was oddly composed and terrifying. "Interesting."
"You don't have Joss to hold over me anymore." I growled, hoping that wasn’t a bluff. I stayed crouched, hoping I could spring away if he came at me again.
"Oh, do I not?" He said, perking up as if he was just finding out a bit of new information. "I wasn't aware."
He pulled my torn blue shirt from the trash bin and tore a strip from it to wrap around his arms. "What about Mr. Hawk? I do have him. Would that be enough to buy your knife from you?"
Would it? I wondered.
But I didn't think he did have Ryan. He had been silent in the hallways, slipping in here without guards, skulking around in the dark like a shadow. Also, Sal was still outside on guard. With a quick glance, I could see him pacing at his post. That was still going according to plan.
I turned back to Reed, who was preoccupied with his makeshift bandage. A desperate plan began to form in my mind and I latched on it.
"I know what you're doing." I stammered, catching his attention as his one green eye bore into mine. I stood up, letting the light bathe me, hoping my voice was loud enough to carry across the courtyard. Small at first, it gained momentum as I spoke. "You're trying to hold it all together, but it's like trying to balance a ball on the head of a pin. You can do it, for a while at least. Maybe a long while. But you have to face that eventually it's going to fall. It's all going to come crashing down, like shattered pieces of glass that you can't put back together. You'll fail, and this horrible thing that you created here will fail right along with you."
By the end I was sneering, my anger having grown with each word. I didn't dare glance over my shoulder to see if Sal had noticed me. I could only hope that what I was doing wasn't horribly foolish. Hawk's men weren't the only ones still out there, but if only I could get Sal’s attention…
"You might be able to hold me for a while." I continued. "You might even be able to kill me, but that doesn't matter so much anymore. I don't matter anymore because it's already over."
"Oh, that's where you're wrong, Ali." He hissed. "You're the only thing that matters."
Reed lunged. The sight of his wide, crazed eye coming at me froze me like a dear in headlights. I was staring death in the face. He was going to kill me.
My head snapped backwards before I even felt the punch, and my body crashed against the window sill behind me. Through the thick haze that had quickly fogged over my vision, I struggled to defend against my attacker and the agonizing pain that radiated from my many injuries.
I was losing both battles.
Chanting in my mind one last phrase, I hoped for the impossible. That he could hear me. That he would know.
I'm sorry, Joss.
Gunfire split the night.
CHAPTER 7 – JOSS
The fat-man roughly dragged me up the stairs with Tristan following close behind. His hands were supportive, trying to hold me up while the other guy yanked me off balance. Part of me was angry at Tristan, but I pushed that away, telling myself I would have done the same thing to protect Ali.
But would I?
I was pushed through the stairwell door and dropped in the hallway.
"Your sister's real pretty, boy." the fat-man sneered and I felt my stomach turn. I was bent over, my face just inches from the carpet and I refused to look up. "Maybe there'll be a little something of her left when Reed's done with her."
The hallway was remarkably vacant beside Sal, who was on guard duty again. I clenched my eyes shut as tight as possible, gritting my teeth. Ali's words repeated in my mind.
If you bite them, they'll turn.
"Come on, Allan." I heard Tristan intervene, but the fat-man only snorted.
"How long before Gwen's back down in the pits, Trist?" Allan growled at him, and Tristan went silent.
"Both you boys need to calm down." Sal spoke up. "Reed's under a lot of pressure right now, we sure don't want to add anything to that pot."
With that, he bent down and started to undo my restraints. Allan snorted and my body jerked as his booted foot nudged me roughly in the ribs. Sal actually batted his foot away before he finished untying me.
When I straightened, Tristan was glaring at Allan. The smirk Allan returned was disturbingly familiar. It was the same smirk he wore right before he hit me. I took a few steps back, not wanting to be close if the two men came to blows.
Sal stepped between them in an attempt to diffuse the tension. "Allan, go on downstairs. Crystal might be lonely."
Allan ignored him, leaning around to smirk again at Tristan. "I like them a little younger, with a little fight left in them."
Tristan remained frozen, his jaw ticking as he clenched it. Allan chuckled sadistically as he finally turned to the stairwell. He opened the door, but paused, turning to me. "Redheads always have the most fight in em."
"Out." Sal snapped before I could react, and he pushed the sweaty man into the stairwell.
"I'll kill him." Tristan said once the door closed. Hearing the determination in his voice, I didn't doubt it. I understood it. The man was disgusting, and the thought of him touching Ali hurt me inside.
Sal turned to Tristan and gave him a reassuring pat on the arm, but it did nothing to erase the angry look on Tristan's face. I felt useless and numb. Sal's eyes met mine, and I was sure I saw sympathy there in his wrinkled brown eyes before he turned away.
"Clear!" He yelled out. All the doors along the hallway started to open. As the hallway filled with playful children, I looked at the scared and tense faces of the women that followed them. I couldn't stay here.
If you bite them, they'll turn.
What did that mean? It was an effort to reign in my rampaging thoughts as Stephanie made her way to me, frowning deeply with concern. She gingerly poked at the new bruises on my face, but didn't say anything. The sadness in her eyes spoke enough.
"How much longer will he let her stay up here?" Tristan said to Sal in hushed tones, but those of us standing near him still heard. "I can't let them take her back down there."
"Hush." Sal said, his eyes darting to me and the others standing in the hallway. Stephanie dropped her head. As if on cue, Gwen stepped from her room and rushed to Tristan, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug. She hadn't overheard the exchange between Allan and Tristan.
Immediately, the anger was washed from Tristan's face when she appeared, but when she wasn't looking, worry creased his brow. As he held her to him, his eyes met mine over her head and I realized a portion of that worry was directed at me. I nodded to him, hoping he understood that I didn't blame him for binding me. His frown relaxed a little and he nodded back.
"Let me wash you up." Stephanie was saying as the stairwell door burst open and
Hawk came rushing through. It was the first time I had seen him since he patched me up.
Hawk paused, seemingly taken aback by all the people still crowded around the doorway. His eyes passed over us all and his gaze seemed to linger on me for a tad longer than anyone else. Then his attention fell to Tristan and he grabbed his arm, pulling him close to whisper in his ear. I was only able to catch a couple words, one of which was Russell.
Then Hawk disappeared as quickly as he'd come.
Tristan gave Gwen a long, deep kiss before following, and Sal took up his post again as if nothing had happened. It was awkward for the few of us that remained standing there, and I began to wonder how to exit gracefully. It was Gwen that moved first, sighing dejectedly as she turned back to her room. She even offered me a sympathetic smile as she passed. My dark, ugly bruises were probably to thank for that.
"Come on." Stephanie pulled at my arm. Even as I let her lead me away, I looked back to Sal, wondering what he would do if I attempted to follow the two men. What had they been talking about? Did Russell have something to do with Ali? I hadn't seen him down there...
If you bite them, they'll turn.
I stumbled. The weight of Ali's words slammed into me, and all the blood drained from my face. I fell against the wall, Stephanie unable to keep her grip on my arm. I barely registered the wide-eyed look of worry on her face as I went down. She was on the outside of my nauseating realization.
Ali bit Russell and he turned. That's what she meant. If I bite them, they'll turn. We can pass on the infection. We weren't immune after all.
I was on the floor, crouching against the wall and I jerked away from Stephanie's reaching hands, suddenly feeling tainted. Sweat had broken out across my brow and now Sal was coming towards me.
"You okay, kid?" He stepped forward, offering me his hand, but I shrank away from him too.
"Ye-ye-yes." I stammered, needing him to stay away. Wrapping my arms around myself, I forced myself to my feet. "Just dizzy."
Sal stepped closer to me, forcing Stephanie back. Her hands were protectively covering her belly as she looked on with concern. At least Sal didn't reach for me again, but he was definitely too close. "He won't hurt her too much."
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