“Hi, gorgeous,” he answers sleepily on the fourth ring.
His soft voice sends more chills up her spine because he sounds like he did in her nightmare. “Don’t worry; you’ll always have the golden boy.” The words crack the fissure in her heart another inch deeper and she takes a deep, shaky breath.
“Heavy breathing? Is this a dirty call?” he teases. A small tear rolls from her eye and runs a trail down her cheek and across her nose before it drips to the sheet.
“Jules? Babe, are you alright?”
There’s a muted shuffling on his end as he asks again, “What’s wrong, Jules?” he says with more bravado.
Closing her eyes, she tries to shake herself from the fist of fear her body is under. “Bad dream,” she manages in a small voice.
He groans under his breath. ”Want to tell me about it?”
“No.”
“You haven’t told me you’ve been having nightmares. Is this a first?”
His voice is filled with concern and Jules feels her mind retreating from the paralysis of the nightmare the more he speaks.
“That bad, huh?” he prods when she doesn’t reply.
“Every night.”
“Every night?” West clears his throat. “Why don’t you tell me about it? Is it the twister? Tanya?”
“I just needed to hear your voice. This one was different and…I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“Babe, I’m sorry. I’m here…what can I do?”
“Nothing, I just wanted to hear you. I’m sorry I missed your messages earlier. I fell asleep.” Stretching down, she pulls the comforter from around her legs back over her body. She scoots up to her pillow, rolls onto her back and holds the phone to her ear. “Sorry I woke you.”
“Don’t do that, Jules.”
“Do what?”
“Trivialize things and apologize to me. Don’t do that. You don’t need a reason to call me, ever.”
“Will you tell me about your night? What did you men do?”
Jules falls asleep sometime later, listening to West talk about their drive and dinner and football. He talks her to sleep. His smooth voice provides the perfect soundtrack to lull her senses.
When she awakens late Saturday morning, the first thing she does is check her messages. There are two on her phone, and the first came soon after she fell asleep.
Spike <3: Sweet dreams, gorgeous. I’ll text you in the morning
The second came around eight in the morning and floored her.
Spike <3: Morning. I’m betting you’re still asleep, or I’m hoping you are. I’ve been tossing all night thinking about you. I wish so badly I could see you this morning. I woke up with these lyrics on my mind…you have no idea how much you mean to me
If your dreams turn to fears
And baby when your nights end in tears
No you won’t ever have to be alone
Cause I promise you…
You will find me, after the storm
Jules reads the lyrics in her mind again and again, singing them to her own tune. She recalls the guys at the bonfire asking him if he had his guitar with him and realizes she never asked him about playing. Making a mental note to hear his voice Monday, she sends him a quick reply before heading down to grab breakfast.
Jules: It’s perfect. YOU are perfect. Have fun today, I’ll watch for you on tv. Call me tonight when you get back to your brother’s <3
The day turns out to be dreary and misty, but Jules finds comfort in the overcast sky because it means she can lie in her pajamas all day, veg out and watch television. It also means the day drags by. She finishes her homework, plays with Jase, watches football and even helps her mother with dinner. But she is still restless, bored, and she misses West something fierce.
They exchange a few texts throughout the day; mostly comments about his brother having a great game and how they are going out to dinner. He asks again about her nightmares and she evades the question by thanking him for his sweet song. He promises to call her after dinner to make plans for Sunday, so she mopes around the house and waits for him to call.
“What’s Katie up to tonight?” her mother asks when she walks through the living room and sees Jules staring at the wall absently. She shrugs in reply. “Why don’t you call her and have her come over? I haven’t seen her much since…well, these past few weeks.”
“Eh…”
“Honey, you can’t sit at home and do nothing just because your boyfriend isn’t around. You did that with Stuart too, you know.”
Jules pops up from the couch and looks at her mom’s frown. “I did?” It is a rhetorical question; she knows her mom is right. She always sat around the house when Stuart couldn’t go out. It’s why she missed most of the parties everyone else went to.
Giving her a gentle smile, her mom sits on the edge of the couch and moves Jules’ feet into her lap. “Sweetie, I know you really care for West, just like I know you cared for Stuart…but you need to be your own person, too. You can’t live for boys.”
“I know, and it’s not that. I just don’t have anything I want to do.”
“What are all of your friends doing?”
She doesn’t have the heart to tell her she stopped talking to most of her friends since school started. She’s shared a few text messages with a few girls from the old squad, but it is surprising how quickly people move on when they don’t see you day in and day out.
“You’re right,” she lies; sitting up. “I’ll go make some calls and see what’s going on. Maybe Katie and I will go to the movies or something?”
Closing herself in her room, she pulls up Facebook and scrolls through the posts. Her newsfeed is littered with updates and photos from Friday night’s game and she cringes; missing the feeling of being in the middle of all the action. She feels its absence in her chest and misses the fun she used to have. A glance at the clock shows it’s almost seven and she looks at herself, still sitting in pajamas with her hair in a messy bun, and makes a decision.
She steps into her bathroom, starts the shower and dials Katie.
“Hey Ju-ju-bee!”
“Hi! What are you doing tonight?”
“Uh, hanging with Jeff. Ruben called him about a party, and I think we might hit it up. Why? You wanna join in?”
“Yeah, I do,” Jules replies, and agrees to be at her house in an hour.
Twelve
“So let’s get this straight right now. Have you ever seen a teen movie or TV show with a big, raging party scene? Get that out of your mind. This is high school, not college, and it’s Texas. In Texas, we do bonfires on the ranch…not mansions and hotel rooms. We do daisy dukes, backward baseball caps and faded blue jeans…not sparkling cocktail dresses or fancy button ups. I love Texas. I love the laid-back, country style of my hometown and my people.”
* * *
It is almost nine when Jeff’s car finally pulls off a back road onto a gravel drive. The drive leads past an orchard; apples, she muses, as they follow another vehicle in front of them. After a few minutes of winding around a trail the car stops. Jeff pulls over, turns off the ignition and parks the car on the side of the drive, along with everyone else.
“Where are we?” she asks; pulling her cell out and checking for any missed calls from West.
“Apple Valley.”
“Apple Valley? I haven’t been here since I was like, ten. Do the Black’s still own it?” Grant Black is a few years older than Jules and her friends. He went to Hillsdale and played football back when she was a freshman. She has no idea where he is now, but she does know he’s not playing for a Texas team.
“They do. It’s cool though; they don’t check up at night. Come on.”
They follow the sound of music down the path further into the fields before coming to a large, open area containing an open pavilion with picnic tables. It seems vaguely familiar in the dark, and Jules remembers they used to do a fall fest every October where you could pick your own apples, go on hay rides, or eat
apple butter and doughnuts.
“Jules!” Ruben’s thick, deep voice booms as they close in on the first fire barrel. “Hey momma.”
“Hey!” she sings. She lets him lift her up and her hands wind around his huge neck as he swings her around; making her head swim.
“Damn girl, I miss you. Katie, you too,” he calls; dropping Jules and giving Katie a bear hug too.
Faces turn their way all around, and Jules recognizes many of them from Hillsdale. Tommy, whom she barely ever sees at school, is sitting on top of a table with a beer in his good hand already. Their eyes meet as his head tips and he raises his drink in a silent salute. She nods and turns; exchanging glances with Katie when excited squeals ring out. Several of their former cheermates rush towards them and she braces for the inevitable tackle-hugs.
“You're here!” Jules joins in the obnoxious revelry, happy to see her old friends, even though she has been a little out of touch.
“Looks like you could use a drink,” a familiar voice whispers behind her.
“You noticed, huh?” she admits; taking in Mark Jones. Mark was trapped in the Grier house with her the night of the twister. He was also one of Stuart’s best friends, and therefore a good friend to her for several years.
“I recognize the face of someone who doesn’t quite fit in,” he mumbles; leaning in and giving her a small hug with a quick peck on the cheek.
“Is that personal experience talking?”
“You could say that.” He shrugs, pulls her to the cooler and plucks out a can before popping it open for her. They stand there just to the side of a fire pit; the dim light of the flames casting long shadows on their faces.
“How you doin’? How’s Rossview?”
“Ha!” she spits out; taking a long chug of her beer and grimacing at the taste as it goes down. “I imagine it’s about as fabulous as Robinson is.”
“I’ll drink to that.” He sighs and they both take long gulps.
“You talk to Stuart?” Stupid! she curses at herself for allowing the question to come out. “Never mind, I shouldn’t have asked.”
She can’t read his expression as he chugs the remainder of his drink and crushes the can. “You can ask. He asks about you.”
“He does?”
“Sure. Unfortunately I never see you, so I don’t have a whole lot of info for him. Lucky for you.”
“Lucky for me? What’s that supposed to mean?”
He grabs another drink before answering her, and another round of screeching rings out. Over her shoulder, Jules catches sight of unknown new arrivals.
“Mark?” she questions, pinning him down with her blue eyes.
“Where’s West?” The sarcasm in his tone explains his attitude and guilt pushes its way in.
She ignores the question. “He knew about West before he left.”
“He knew you were confused, Jules. Even I had your back on that one.”
“You what?”
“Before he told you he was going to Houston, he told me. He also told me you were distant. He didn’t know what to do and asked my advice since I’d been in that house too.” She forces herself to drink the remainder of the beer as she listens to him. “I told him to back off, and he became pissed as hell when West moved in on you.”
“He didn’t move in on me; not really.”
He harrumphs and Jules rolls her eyes. “He didn’t, Mark. It wasn’t like that.”
“I know. It was the circumstance, and I tried to explain that. I figured you would flirt a little and West would lose interest, so I told Stuart to just give you time. I didn’t expect you to end up glued at the hip.”
“Gossip travels, huh?”
“Through Tyler and all the way to Houston, doll.” The use of the nickname ‘doll’ serves as an awkward reminder of Stuart. He always called her doll, and it stokes the fires of guilt another notch.
“So he heard we’re together, then?”
“Yep.” He tips his face closer to hers, evidently catching the sadness in her voice or the change in her stance. “He’ll be fine, Jules. He doesn’t know what you’ve been through. How different things are here for all of us. He got to leave.”
Mark’s voice is filled with bitterness. She shakes her head and plunks her hands on her hips. “You know what we need, Jones?”
“What do we need, Blacklin?”
“Beer. Lots of it.”
And that’s what they do. They start chugging down cheap beer; the alcohol loosening whatever bitterness Mark has and relieving the guilt Jules feels. Dropping to the grass close to a fire barrel, they laugh and drink. Mark tells her about Robinson and complains about playing football with their team. She fills him in on Rossview. Tommy joins in eventually, declaring his intent to get totally wasted, and Jules and Mark happily agree with his plan. They each pull a new beer and race to see who can chug one down first, with most of Jules’ ending up on her shirt.
Soon the field is full of partying teens. It reminds her of the last time she was surrounded by so many students. It was at the Ice Shack, the night of the tornado. Anxiety filters in as she recalls the panicked crowd that night.
“Where’s Katie?” she mumbles, her speech a little slower than normal.
“Uh, next to you, silly.” Katie giggles and sways side to side, patting Jules' head.
“Wait!” Jules exclaims. She holds her arms out, her fingers splayed wide, like she’s stopping traffic. “Do you guys feel that?”
“I’m feeling good…” Tommy mumbles and the others nod in agreement.
Hesitating, Jules bites her lip and looks around at her friends. “Why is my ass vibrating?”
Giggles spew from Katie’s mouth, along with a mouthful of beer, and Jules falls into Mark’s lap.
She lifts her butt cheek and tries to find whatever is biting at her. “What the hell?”
“It’s your phone.” Mark sighs. He has the audacity to reach behind her and pull the cell from her rear pocket, which makes Jules laugh.
He hands her the phone and she straightens; pushing up off of him. Running her hands through the hair covering her face, she looks up and her eyes fall onto a group of people she didn’t expect to see at this party. Across the way at another fire pit, but with a direct view of her position, is Aubrey with two minions and several guys she recognizes.
Keeping her gaze on Aubrey, her finger hits the green ‘Answer’ button at the same time as she elbows Katie and wails, ”What the hell are they doing here?”
Aubrey’s body snaps to attention, as if she’d been listening to the conversation, though Jules knows she can’t hear them over all of the crowd noise. They sneer at each other and the blonde curls her lips into a malicious smile. Jules is so busy glaring at Aubrey that she misses West yelling through the phone at first.
“Jules!” he shouts and she glances around before zeroing in on the phone in her hand. In her over-inebriated state, she’s slow to react to the voice calling her name on the other end. “Jules!”
“Hello?”
“Hey, what’s going on?”
“Oh, hey! It’s my boyfriend, West Rutledge!” she shouts; smiling gleefully towards Aubrey. “What’s up, baby?”
“Uh, wow,” he mumbles on a light laugh. “You sound a bit wasted, babe. Who you with?”
“No one…or everyone.” She laughs and glances around at all of the chattering people she doesn’t recognize, and a few she does.
“Hey K, who’s all here?” she asks her best friend for assistance.
“I dunno. I think I’m a little drunk. Jeff?”
“Oh yeah, Jeff is here,” she echoes. She’s talking — to the air, not to West — and she finds the cell laying in her lap. Pulling it back to her ear, she repeats herself. “Jeff is here. Oh and Ruben, Tommy and Mark, too. He touched my ass, though. Should I be mad?” She giggles.
“I’m pretty sure I should be,” West grumbles. “Where are you at? I’m-”
She interrupts him and hits Mark’s arm, saying, “West
is mad at you.”
“Me?” he thunders, and his hand shoots out to grab her phone. He wrestles it away from her hand and shouts into the mouthpiece. “What the hell, man? What did I do? West? Hello?” He looks up from the screen with wide eyes. “I think I hung up on him.”
“Eh, he’ll call back.” She drops the phone in front of her legs and finds Aubrey again. She’s still standing there with her eyes making evil little squints at her and Mark. It reminds Jules of an angry little mouse. Wait, no…not a mouse, Jules laughs to herself, and shakes her head to clear it. Something beady and bitchy. A rat, maybe? she debates silently.
Katie stretches her legs out in the grass before them and knocks her shoulder against Jules as she gets comfortable.
“Hey, isn’t that Carter?” Jules’ eyes follow Katie’s finger as she points toward the group of people Aubrey stands with.
Sure enough, Carter has joined them and Aubrey’s pinched face is now glowing.
“What a little fake she is.”
On the other side of Katie, Jules overhears Jeff muttering into his phone. “Hey man…yeah she is. Sorry, I didn’t even realize.” Jules leans forward, trying to eavesdrop, sure he’s talking to West. “Apple Valley…you are? Yeah, we’ll stay here. ‘Kay.”
“West will be here in thirty,” he explains after hanging up.
“Um, no. He’s not home.”
“No, actually he is home. He came home early.”
“Awww, he missed you!” Katie croons; falling against Jeff with more giggles.
Two things hit Jules. First, Katie giggles an obscene amount when she’s drinking, and second, Mark.
“Oh crap, Mark! He’s coming to kick your ass!” she warns; her muddled head clearing quickly.
Mark, who is now lying in the grass on his back, leans up on his elbows. His expression is best described as dazed and confused. “What?”
“West is on his way here…” she trails off, grabs her cell and scrambles to her feet.
Out of Ruins Page 11