I grab a hold of his arm and pull him back. His face is beet red and his breathing is labored and short.
“We’re happy, see.” I plaster on a smile.
“Can I just meet Sadie?” my mom has nerve.
“No.”
But of course as soon as the word comes out of my mouth, Sadie slides out of the door, shooting me a look of hesitation. Jessa follows and links her arm through Grant’s. Our parents stare at us. Me with my soon to be bride and Grant with his wife. The smiles widen across their mouths and they appear genuinely happy for us.
“Now go.”
Sadie extends her hand. “I’m Sadie Miller.” She introduces herself and I groan.
“I’m Jessa Bishop.”
They all shake hands and bile leaks up my throat.
Grant and I step back while our girls spur a conversation with our biological parents. We survey one another and shake our heads.
“You want to talk to two pieces of shit, be my guest,” I say and walk into my house.
“Jessa.” Grant’s demanding voice gets lost in his clenched teeth.
She shoots him a sympathetic glimpse, but doesn’t follow.
“Suit yourself,” he says and follows me into the house.
If they want to be a part of them, fine, but I’m not going to entertain people that never wanted me.
Sadie
BRADY HAS HIS mom’s lips. That’s the first thing I notice when I slide out the door. Well, right after Brady’s scowl. I’m not trying to go against him, but how many times have we said that we are one. That whatever one goes through the other does too.
She smiles and instantly I see the similarity between her and Brady. I thought he was the spitting image of Vince, but I was wrong. Man, I was wrong. He’s a perfect mix between the two. He has those gooey and lost eyes like his dad, but a lot more comes from his mom.
“Hi, Sadie, I’m Victoria. You can call me Tori.” Her small hand clasps onto mine and we shake.
Let’s not get too pleasant just yet, Tori.
Jessa shakes who I come to find out is Keith Bishop, Grant’s dad. Two years ago, I heard the stories and now the two people who haunted our guys’ past are standing before us, smiling as though nothing is wrong.
“I think you should give the boys some space,” I say and Tori’s hand covers her heart like I offended her.
“I agree. They are still very hurt and you showing up is a big surprise,” Jessa adds in and thank goodness she’s on my side.
“Maybe you can come back tomorrow?” I offer, although I guarantee your son won’t be here if he knows you’re coming.
“Do you think he’ll talk to us then?” Keith asks Jessa.
She shrugs. “I’m not sure, I doubt it.” She’s so honest. Can’t she just get them off the porch and we’ll deal with tomorrow then.
“I don’t know how the guys will handle all this, but you surprising them wasn’t a good choice.”
“They’re our children,” Tori argues and I cock my head to the side. She has more nerve than I would.
“Frankly, you walked out of his life, what eight years ago?”
She draws back again, and I’m guessing I offended her once more.
“Excuse me. You barely know me. You can’t judge a situation you know nothing about, darling.”
Oh great, so now I’m going to have a fight with Brady’s mom. I don’t think so.
“I’m suggesting you come back later. We have our friends and family over.” I argue, hoping she understands my point and Jessa scoots closer to me, forming a united front.
“I’m family,” she comes back to me and a hollow laugh escapes my throat before I can clamp it shut.
“You’re not family.” Brady opens the door. I should have known he wouldn’t leave me to fend for myself, which makes my heart overflow with love that he’s mine. “Let’s go, Sadie.” He extends his hand and I grab hold to go back inside. Jessa slides through the opening and Brady shuts the door in their faces, flicking the lock.
“Next time listen to me,” he tells me, his eyes burning with anger.
“I was just trying to make peace.”
“There’s no peace to give. They aren’t part of our lives.” Grant comes in with Addy and hugs Jessa to his body as though he’s protecting them from harm’s way. Maybe in a way he is.
The rest of the evening, Brady remains distant. This is how he works his issues out, so I keep my distance, waiting for him to come to me. He and Grant whisper in the corner for most of the night while Jessa and I exchange raised eyebrows. The arrival of their parents has definitely put a kink in our wedding.
Everyone leaves around nine o’clock. That whole we’ve got kids excuse. I wish I could leave the cold confines of this house. My mom and grandma instantly yawn and over exaggerate their tiredness and retreat upstairs into their bedrooms. I guess everyone is under the belief if they ignore the fact of our unexpected guests, it didn’t really happen.
Brady busies himself in the kitchen, and exits through the backdoor after I enter the kitchen. I prop myself up on the counter and wait for him to return, which he does a second later.
“We’re not talking about it, Sadie,” he says, his eyes never veering my way.
“Brady,” I sigh, but he shakes his head vehemently.
“I said no. Don’t try your psychology babble on me.” He pulls out a beer and twists off the top before gulping down half of it. This could be bad; Brady only drinks when something is really eating him up. Not that I didn’t think his mom’s return wouldn’t be grounds for him to have the occasional beer, but I wish he’d talk to me about it.
I hop off the counter. “Then take me upstairs and work it out on my body.” I’m half joking, but he glances at me from the corner of his eye in annoyance. “I’m joking.”
“I got it.” He turns to me in his chair, both his hands gripping my hips. His head falls to my stomach and I thread my fingers through his longer strands of brown hair. “I can’t.” His voice stutters and I’m positive he’s trying to hold himself together. “No way will my perfect day be ruined by her presence.”
“Okay,” I agree. I shouldn’t have gone out there earlier. I should have listened to him. My failed attempt to help only worsened the situation.
“I don’t want to deal with this. Please make her go away,” he begs, and my heart breaks for this man who usually has it all together. We joke that he’s the father of our small group, and right now he’s crumbling in my hands.
“Okay. I will. I’ll handle it, baby.” I fall to my knees and take his head in my hands. Wetness fills the brims of his eyelids and a lump forms in my throat. I’ve never seen Brady cry, ever.
He nods and wraps my body around him and I hold him tightly to my chest. “I promise. I’ll take care of it.”
Then his tongue snakes out and he casts kisses to my collarbone. The reason I made the joke earlier is because this is how Brady forgets his problems. He buries himself in me when he’s overwhelmed and can’t see straight. He once admitted he has to lose himself into something else. It used to be his music and now it’s me.
I happily allow him to distract from the issues torturing him with my body. He picks me up and locks all the doors, checking twice. My mom and grandma’s doors are shut as we climb up the second floor to the third.
He drops me to the bed and crawls up to me, his eyes intense with lust. For the next hour, he uses my body as his own reprieve. The niceness is he makes love to me. Whispering sweet nothings in my ear with soft flowing kisses and lingering touches. By the time we’re done, we lie entwined in each other’s arms, completely spent. His hands sweep my long hair back and he nuzzles into my neck.
“I’m sorry,” he apologizes for no reason.
“I love you,” I say, diverting the topic of his guilt.
“I’ll never let her touch us,” he swears and my heart jabs to how much he hates his mother.
“Babe?” He pulls back to look in my eyes. “I think you need
closure.” He’ll argue it, I’m positive.
“No I don’t. I said none of that babble.” He tries to slide out of the bed, but I lock my legs around his long limbs.
“You will not run away from this.” My voice much more demanding than I had anticipated.
“Why, you do,” he sneers and I’m thrown back from his dig at me, even if he has a point.
“That’s exactly why I won’t let you.” I sit up and the sheet falls to my lap, giving Brady a show, he’s enjoying since his eyes zero in on my breasts now.
“You told me you’d handle it,” he says, his voice breaking.
“I will, but I strongly suggest we do it together.” I grab my T-shirt and toss it over my body.
“I never want to see her again.” He stands from the bed, shrugs on his pajama pants and leaves the room.
I know where he’s going, downstairs to the studio. I wouldn’t be surprised if Rob and Dex sneak in too.
I lay in bed, wondering what I could do to make this situation better. Needing to talk to someone in similar a position as me, I call Jessa.
“Hey, Sadie,” she whispers and I hear shuffling in the background.
“Can you talk?” I whisper myself like a dummy. I don’t have children.
“Yeah. Grant’s halfway to wasted outside, freezing his ass off. I just got Addy down.”
“I don’t know what to do. Brady’s lost it,” I admit and she agrees with an uh huh.
“Could you imagine what this is they’re going through, internally I mean. People that left them show up how many years later.”
“I know, but I think they need to talk to them. Each say their peace and see what happens.”
“You’re dreaming. I can tell you right now, Grant won’t. You should have seen him, Sadie. Constantly scanning the rearview mirrors as though they were following us home. He shuffled us into the house like we were being hunted by killers. Immediately he turned on the alarm. He’s lost his mind.” I hear ruffling and chomping. How can she eat?
“What are you eating?”
“Oh My God, potato chips and ranch dip. I can’t get enough of it.” She laughs and I do too. When she was pregnant with Addy, she craved chocolate shakes. I think she lived at Moo’s.
“Brady’s playing downstairs.”
“Again?”
“Yeah. At this rate he should be able to perform at his wedding.”
“If only his bride would let him.”
“I reneged on that, okay? Let it go.” Jessa never fails to rehash my regrets.
She laughs into the phone. “Oh, here comes trouble searching for another drink to put himself into oblivion. My man doesn’t talk his problems out, he drinks them into submission.”
“Mine doesn’t either, but we need to get them to.” I try to entice her to help me out on this front, but Jessa and I are different. Where I mettle, she waits for him to come around.
“I can’t, Sadie. Grant’s firm on this; he doesn’t want anything to do with them. It’s over.” More chomping. I hear Grant in the background ask who she’s talking to. “Just Sadie.” Her voice is nicer than ever.
“Tell her no, I’m not talking to those assholes,” Grant says and Jessa sighs.
“See, I told you,” she says and my stomach churns because although I’m no good at talking my own issues out, I try to push others to.
“Okay. I face defeat.” I lie back down on my bed and stare up at our ceiling.
“Good. I gotta go. He’s making so much clatter trying to start the fricking fire pit, he’s going to wake Addy. Which then, I’d have to beat the shit out of him. Joking, of course.” She laughs and hangs up before I even say good-bye.
I move over to the chaise lounge and open the blinds. Rob and Dex are crossing the street with a six-pack in each hand. Yep, this isn’t going to be a good night. They catch me in the window and raise their cases of beer. Dex gives a thumbs up as though he’s going to fix this. But he can’t, only Brady can, and he’s never good at fixing his own problems, only others.
I lean back and call the only other person who might be able to convince Brady to face his mom.
I dial the number, glancing at the clock. Before ten, so she should still be up.
She answers immediately.
“I know, she had the nerve to come over here too. Where is he?” Maura’s voice is annoyed with a tinge of panic.
“Downstairs with Dex and Rob.”
“Oh great, those morons aren’t going to help him out of this.” I can just see her shaking her head.
“He won’t handle it,” I say and a long breath is released over the line.
“I figured. I’m supposed to meet only her for lunch tomorrow, do you want to join?”
“I don’t want to intrude on your mother/daughter time.”
She huffs. “Trust me, you won’t be intruding. I don’t want to go either, but I’ll face her and speak my mind.” I hear a wine bottle opening in the background.
“Okay. I think Brady wants me to tell her she’s not welcome at the wedding, but I can’t keep her out of the church.” I argue because truthfully, I’m starting to panic. I don’t want Brady to stand next to me at the altar with his mind not focused on us.
“I’ll tell her. Try to get him to join us. We’re meeting at noon at Filgree’s. You can bet she’ll be paying the bill at the end.” She laughs a conniving giggle.
“I’ll see what I can do.”
“Sadie, relax. I know your wedding is this week and things are so crazy, but I’ll pay one of the football kids to stand guard at the doors to keep them out if I have to.”
I smile. Maura is so strong and self-assured. So opposite from myself.
“Thanks, Maura.”
“Sure. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
“Yeah. Bye.” We hang up and I feel oddly a little better after talking to Maura. I know if she has to, she’ll whip Brady into place.
Brady
I LEAVE BEFORE Sadie ever wakes up, because I’m not in the mood to entertain her let’s all be one big happy family bullshit. What would she say if her dad showed up on our doorstep? I doubt her arms would open for him.
Ida and Maggie are downstairs already and I almost backstop and secretly sneak out the front door, but how can I honestly dodge my soon to be in-laws?
“Morning, ladies,” I greet them and grab a to-go coffee mug from the cabinet.
“Good morning, Brady.” Ida comes up to me and places her hand on my arm. “How are you doing?”
Crap. Not one sarcastic comment about my body. I hate it when people feel sorry for me. Despise actually.
“I’m good, Ida. Thank you for asking. Do you have a fun day planned with Sadie?” I lean back on the counter and Ida ventures back to the table, joining Maggie.
“I’m going to talk to her about Theo. I have a really good idea about preserving his memory during the service so she feels he’s there with her.” Maggie leans back in her crisp button-down shirt and sweater over her shoulders. The epitome of a high society wife. No one would ever suspect otherwise.
“Thank you, Maggie.” I twist the cap on my to-go cup, not reaching their eyes. I’m embarrassed for what happened last night. Or who is more like it. Fuck her if she thinks she’s going to ruin my wedding with some attempt to rekindle our relationship.
My phone rings in my pocket and I pull it out, quickly hitting ignore. Figures Maura would call. I wonder if she got a surprise on her doorstep too?
“Have a great day, ladies.” I wave to the women who will be my family in a week.
They each say goodbye and I exit out the back door, sliding into my Camaro. I stare down at the racing stripes and think how I should paint over them. Now that I’ll be married man and all. Responsibility and all that shit that goes with it.
My engine roars to life and I have to thank Rob again for that tune-up the other day. Driving has always calmed me. Not like drag racing with Rob, just the mindless action while music fills my ears. I take the long way
to work; hopefully this shit works itself out in my head before I get there. My game has been slipping at work and I wouldn’t doubt if my boss, Mr. Friar, sees good reason to let me go. Maybe he’s giving me a pass until the wedding’s over.
Weaving through the streets I grew up on, I pass houses of my friends who have long gone on with their lives. Did I make a mistake staying in Western? Should I have ventured off after graduation like my other friends? It was my intention before Sadie entered my life. I would have disappeared immediately and left good ole dad in Maura’s hands.
That’s just a woulda, coulda, shoulda that is null and void now. Sadie captured me my senior year and I didn’t want to be anywhere she wasn’t. I think about my house, the house I grew up in and could I raise our family there? There were certain aspects about living in a college town my whole life that I’m not sure I want my kids to experience. Drinking heavily available, college girls thinking you’re older than a sophomore in high school. My experience with sex came early, but I never abused the easy access like my other friends. I guess I’ve always been an old sole so to speak. That, or I had too much responsibility from a young age. That thought alone only brings her face in my head. My fists clench the steering wheel and my foot presses harder on the gas.
“Who the fuck does she think she is?” I scream as my tires squeal around a corner. My fist pounds the steering wheel and I shift it to high gear, pressing harder on the gas. I can’t go fast enough to get her out of my system.
Out of fucking nowhere, a stop sign in front of a school appears and my tires squeal to a stop just in time. The crossing guard and parents all stare at me with their mouths open. Some pointing fingers and saying things I can’t hear over my music. I place my hand up in the air in form of an apology, but they don’t seem to care. Hurriedly, I fiddle with the knob of my radio to turn it down, which appeases them slightly.
My face is bright red in embarrassment by the time I pull over that white crosswalk line. Slowly, I turn at the next street and head to work. If I was those parents I would have beat my ass, so I know how lucky I am to drive away without any consequences.
Love Me Always (The Invisibles) Page 5