“Don’t say anything, Guy. I didn’t tell you this to get you to say something to me. I don’t really know why I told you at all. I probably shouldn’t have.”
“I’m glad you did. I want to know you, Tori. I may need a minute to calm down like I just did but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to listen to anything you choose to tell me.”
“But you were disgusted.”
“By your situation, not by you. I agree with what you said about kids and I’ll never understand parents who don’t treat them as all kids deserve but it’s your parents I have the problem with, not you. Christ, Tor, I can’t begin to imagine what your childhood was like for you.”
“I didn’t have one. I don’t think anyone I grew up with did. I went to private schools and my family was pretty much the same as everybody else’s. I was the only oddball. The rest of the kids I knew never thought to question the way they lived. Even my friends made fun of me for being a weirdo if I brought up how unreal it all seemed too often. Do I wish it had been different? Of course I do. Do I feel sorry for myself or want you to because it wasn’t? Absolutely not. I can’t change it but I’m not part of it anymore so it really doesn’t matter.”
“You have no idea how utterly amazing you are,” Guy stated, caressing her cheek.
“That’s our cue to change the subject.” Guy nodded. “But just so you know, I haven’t told anyone else about all that.”
“I won’t either. Thank you for trusting me.” He brushed her lips.
“Yeah, well.” She shrugged. “Consider it an apology for hitting you in the same spot. I didn’t even consider that I could hurt you.”
“I’m fine, trust me. You won’t even see it by morning, I promise.”
Tori still felt bad but let it drop anyway. She was getting numb again and knew arguing would make it worse. “So Lita told Todd everything?”
“She had to. Although I suspect she went above and beyond the simple report her job requires when she told Todd about how often you got past my defenses. You can bet he’ll make sure my sisters all know too. Thank God I stayed on my feet. I’d never live it down if you’d knocked me on my ass.”
Tori chuckled. “Hey, Guy? Thanks for keeping me from thinking about them.”
“Thanks for letting me.”
“Thank Todd, not me. That was the other thing he talked about this morning. He guessed I might be too self-absorbed to realize that you needed to distract me as much as I needed to be distracted so he asked me to consider your suggestions instead of just rejecting them.”
“Then I’m even more pleased you let me teach you a little kickboxing. Lita’s description of you scoring some good hits will give all of them a few minutes of stress relief.”
“Oh, come on. You don’t have to keep saying that. I know I only hit you and kicked you because you let me.”
Guy shook his head. “No, I didn’t. I admit I was being sloppy when we first started and it would have been more difficult for you if you’d had to defend yourself but I swear that was all you, tiger. I wasn’t just talking when I told Todd you had good instincts. Too bad you didn’t think of it in high school. If you’d had some decent training you really could have been the state champ.”
“Maybe you could get me ready so I can enter one of those tournaments I’ve seen advertised. If I did well enough to be interviewed I could say I owe it all to my family and give the name of the salon.”
“Okay.” Guy laughed with her. “Could we wait until tomorrow for the next round? I’m still feeling a little beat up today and I don’t want you to overdo it and strain something.”
“I was kidding.”
“Me too.” He grinned. “So what should we do since we’re not going back to the gym?”
“Oh no. You’re looking at me like you do when you’re about to make me eat something and I know I’ll throw up if I try to so please don’t.”
“You’ll let me know when you’re ready?”
“Yes,” she promised as she unsuccessfully tried to hide a shiver.
Guy reached for her hands. “Damn, your skin is like ice. Why didn’t you say something?”
“I didn’t notice,” she admitted. “I think I’m a little out of it.”
“Tori.”
“I’m okay, Guy.” When Tori met his eyes, she was overwhelmed by the tenderness she found. “Will you let me do something?”
“Should I be afraid to ask?”
“No.” She reached for the bottom of his shirt and eased it up. “You wouldn’t let me kiss your boo-boo when you were on the phone. Can I now?” Tori gently covered the purplish bruise and looked back up at him.
“Please do.” Guy held his shirt out of the way.
She slowly leaned forward and barely touched him with her lips. “Maybe you should take that off and stretch out,” she suggested shyly. When Guy tugged off his shirt, she slid to the floor next to the sofa. “You might be more comfortable with another pillow,” she decided as she snagged one off the nearest chair. “Better?” Tori asked after fluffing it under his head.
“Somewhat. Be much better if you were up here with me.”
“Gee, that’s what I was thinking too.” Tori spent the next few minutes covering his slightly bruised skin with soft kisses and caresses. “You are so warm.” She ran her hand across his chest and held it over his heart. “I’m tired but I don’t want to sleep. I know I’ll see them die if I do and I don’t think I could stand watching as it happens now that I know they’re real. It’ll be almost as horrible tonight but it won’t be the same. Am I being too selfish? I mean, what if they talk about where they are and they die because I’m too scared to let myself sleep now?”
“They never mentioned it before. I seriously doubt they will this time.”
“You sure?”
“No, but I’m not going to let you find out now that you have me thinking about it. It’s not up to you anymore. I’m taking it out of your hands and whatever the outcome, it’s my responsibility now.”
“You don’t have to do this.”
“I know but I am. I let you kiss my boo-boo and make it all better so now you have to let me do something.”
“What?”
“We already agreed that you should be on the sofa with me. You said I felt warm and I think you still feel cold. What I want is you to take off your shirt just like I did for you and stretch out on top of me so we have lots of skin-to-skin contact. I want you to tuck your hands underneath me and let me pull this cover over us. I want to wrap my arms around you and hold you against my chest while we spend the next few hours talking about whatever comes to mind. Can we do that?”
Tori answered by removing her sweatshirt. She climbed between his legs and let Guy position her body because she was afraid she’d press against his semi-hard cock and cause him pain. After he had their lower bodies comfortable, Tori shifted her head so she could listen to his heart.
“This is so nice,” Tori sighed.
“Better than nice,” Guy agreed. “Now don’t go to sleep on me or I’ll be forced to tickle you.”
“But I’m not ticklish.”
“Ah. Okay then, don’t go to sleep or I’ll uncover your back and lick as much of it as I can reach so you get real cold, real fast.”
“That’s just plain mean.”
“I know and I’d hate to be so mean to you but you’ll be the one who caused it so you’ll be the mean one, not me.”
“Then you better start talking so neither one of us has to be mean.”
“Maybe we should make the first topic lady’s choice so I don’t start out boring you to sleep.”
“Hmm.” Tori paused to push her hands farther beneath him. She stalled by taking a deep breath. “Okay, the first thing I want to say is that I’m sorry for falling asleep last night.”
“Huh? Maybe I’m being stupid but I don’t understand why you’re apologizing.”
“Because, um, well, because I fell asleep right away. Without, um, I mean, you were…”
/>
Guy chuckled. “Oh, I get it. You think you should apologize because you fell asleep without taking care of my hard-on.”
“You don’t have to laugh at me.”
“I’m not. Listen to me. Last night ended exactly as it should have. The way you trusted me was so special. As special as the way you made me come. Anything more might have taken away from that. If you haven’t noticed, I’m perpetually hard around you. I’m getting used to it because unless you’re willing to take care of that for me, oh, say every nine minutes, twenty-four hours a day, there’s not a whole hell of a lot I can do about it.”
“Guy. I was being serious.”
“So am I. Tori, I won’t deny how much I want you. We haven’t really started yet. So far we’ve just been teasing each other. No, let me finish. Don’t think I didn’t love every second we’ve been together because you already know how much I did. But there are many more possibilities for us to explore. And I’m sure we’ll keep coming up with new ones so we’ll never run out of ways to find pleasure with each other. There are going to be times when one of us gets more attention than the other and there’s not a damn thing wrong with that because it’ll balance out.”
“But I felt so selfish when I woke up this morning. That’s why I was afraid to face you.”
“Wait. You thought I’d be mad?” Tori nodded mutely. “Christ, no, tiger. How could I ever be mad at the gorgeous babe who let me spend all that time licking her tasty pussy? How could I be mad at you when you look so beautiful and feel so good when you come around my tongue? How could I be mad when you made me feel so special by giving yourself to me like that?”
“Guy,” Tori sounded lost.
“Sh, don’t get upset. I know you don’t understand but I promise you will if you stick with me.”
“I’m scared.”
“So am I but it’s a really good kind of scared, isn’t it?”
“I don’t know how to do this.”
“I can help you if you let me. We can help each other.”
“Yeah, right. Like you need any help, especially from me.”
“But I do. I’ve never been in love before either. The only difference between us is that I’ve already accepted it for what it is. I’m ready for us because I’ve been hoping to find you. I know the life I want with you is possible because I grew up surrounded by people who have what we can have. You’re not sure any of this exists, that a couple can love and trust without boundaries because you weren’t exposed to it before you came here and even now you’ve kept yourself on the fringes.”
Tori caught a few chest hairs in her teeth and tugged to get Guy’s attention.
“Hey! What was that for?”
“Distraction so you let me change the subject before I hit overload.” She kissed the spot. “Better?”
Guy shifted his groin slightly. “What do you think?”
Tori giggled. “I’d say that’s a yes. I’d also say it really was okay for me to leave you hard last night since I don’t think you’re exaggerating anymore about that being your constant state.”
“Tease. You might want to watch what you say next, tiger.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re nice and warm now.”
“Yeah, so?”
“If you’re not cold anymore there is some other reason for your nipples to be as hard as my cock.” She gasped. “Personally, I’m glad to know I’m not the only one affected here. Gives me more to work with. Now I can ask you to listen to your body until you’re ready to hear your heart. Or are you going to pretend that you’re not excited and deny that you want me?”
“No. But that’s just physical. It doesn’t have anything to do with love.”
“All right, Tor, if you say so,” Guy agreed pleasantly. “Want to talk about something else or should we discuss how physical we can get together?”
“Tempting as that sounds, I think we better save that for later. Why don’t you tell me why you have an accent?”
Guy was soon lost in his past. “If you ask Mom she’ll insist we would have been fine staying in the two-room apartment while Dad finished his time with the Merchant Marines. I think she would have managed somehow because, let me tell you, my mother is the most determined person I know. The fact that she had an almost toddler, an infant and was pregnant again with a husband who was away for months at a time didn’t stop her from finding work. She would have continued to juggle it all after I was born too if she’d had to but I’m getting ahead of the story.
“Dad says they couldn’t wait to get married even though they couldn’t afford it and both sets of parents told them not to expect any help if they went against their advice. He and Mom eloped and he joined the Merchant Marines because they decided it would be worth spending time apart for a few years if they could then afford a house when he got out. They hadn’t exactly planned on having kids right away but they’ll both tell you they didn’t do a thing to prevent it.
“Marie was born nine and a half months after their wedding. She was five weeks old before Dad got to see her. Mom was pregnant with Terese by the time his month leave was up. He was home for her birth but gone again a few weeks later. I was conceived on his next leave.
“The whole time Dad believed their parents would come around. Mom was skeptical but she sent letters and pictures every month or so since it made Dad happy. She included Dad’s grandmother even though she’d never met her. She says she did it because she loved the way Dad looked when he talked about her.
“Two weeks after I was born Mom opened the door and, as she calls it, entered the Twilight Zone. Granma got tired of waiting for Mom’s and Dad’s parents to come to their senses and decided it was time for her to take charge. A week later, when Dad got home he walked into utter chaos. He says Mom was unpacking as fast as Granma packed. Everything they owned was thrown somewhere and Marie and Terese were crawling through it, laughing and babbling while Mom and Granma argued over Granma’s plan, which was to take Mom and the babies back to Quebec with her until Dad was off the ship. After Dad got them calmed down enough to explain he figured out that Mom didn’t object to moving. She just wasn’t leaving until he got back and agreed it was a good idea.
“Dad had signed on for five years. He got out two months before their fifth child was born. We spent another two years in Quebec while Dad did an apprenticeship with a local electrician before we moved back here. After that, my sisters and I spent summers there.”
Guy continued to speak, telling Tori everything he remembered about his time with his great-grandmother and what his childhood had been like. For the most part, she let him ramble, uninterrupted except for an occasional question.
“I wish I could have met her,” Tori stated when Guy paused.
“Me too. She would have loved you. And I think you would have loved her too, not that she would have given you any other choice.”
“No wonder you are the way you are.”
“Which is?”
“Everything you’ve said about your mom and great-grandmother combined and magnified. Determined, stubborn, one-track mind, willful, focused, persistent…”
“Kind-hearted, loving, loyal, patient, truthful, dedicated,” Guy added. “You can’t pick out the traits that suit your purpose and ignore the others I share with them. I’m sure you’re right. I did grow up under the influence of their strong personalities. I’m proud of who they helped me become. Overall, I like who I am. I think Granma would be very pleased with the way I turned out. I know my parents are.”
“Hearing you talk about them like this almost makes me want to meet them.”
“Ah,” Guy hesitated.
“What?” Tori tensed, dreading what she knew was coming. “Guy?” she asked her whole question with just his name as she tugged her hands from under his body and used them to prop her chin so she could see his face.
“There’s something we need to talk about and I’ve been avoiding it because I honestly don’t know what to do.”
/> “I can tell already that I’m not going to like this. Too bad too since I enjoyed the last hour. May as well just spit it out now that the fun’s over.”
Guy took a deep breath and linked his fingers behind her back. “Terese and Todd host a Christmas open house every year.”
Tori immediately began to shake her head. She would have pulled away but Guy’s arms prevented her. “Un-uh. No way. No how. Not happening. No, and I mean hell no! Do you hear me? Are you listening? You’d better because there is absolutely, positively, without a doubt, not any chance in the universe that I am going to that with you.”
“Tori—”
“Don’t bother. Just forget it because nothing you say will change my mind so don’t waste your breath.”
“Tori—”
“What’s with you? How many different ways do I need to say this? For the last time, Guy, thanks but no thanks. I must regrettably decline your kind invitation. I have a prior commitment that I just can’t get out of so, I’m sorry to disappoint you but I’m afraid I simply can’t be there. It’s impossible.”
“That might be more effective if I’d told you when it was.”
“Doesn’t matter because I’m booked from now until the third Tuesday in April.”
“Then you have some calls to make because your plans have changed.”
“Just like that? You say jump and I say how high? And if I refuse to get in the car when you order me to you’ll handcuff us together and carry me to it? Where do you get off, bossing me around like you are somebody? Who the hell do you think you are anyway?”
“Tori,” he said sharply, his tone silencing her. “I am the man who cares for you enough that I’ve stayed awake for hours trying to find the solution that is easiest and least upsetting for you. I’m the man who loves you enough to worry about whether or not my good-intentioned family will hurt you by being themselves. I’m the man who would do anything to keep a smile on your face and your eyes from taking on that cautious look they get when you realize that you forgot yourself and opened up the slightest bit as you put the distance back between us.”
“Nobody asked you to do that so why don’t you just forget it? Why don’t you just go away and leave me alone?” Tori cried as she finally struggled out of Guy’s embrace. She got off his chest and moved to stand at the window on the far side of the room. She stared out, her rigid back toward Guy and fought to hold in her tears. As she wrapped her arms around her middle she felt more alone than she ever had in her life.
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