by W. Winters
“Is he…?” I trail off as my bottom lip wobbles ever so slightly.
Seth’s answer is everything that I need. “He’s perfect.”
He never stops stroking the side of our baby’s head as I gently rock him, not wanting to disturb him.
“He had to have a few surgeries and he was a champ through all of them.” As Seth talks, my inhales come in shaky and it takes everything not to cry even harder. I could drown in the sadness of what we’ve been through, or I can rock my perfect baby to sleep while the man I love tells me he loves me too.
I choose the latter.
“He loves to hear stories and I swear he knows your name,” Seth says and I look into his blue eyes, shining with devotion as he looks at the sweet bundle in my arms. I never stop rocking as he tells me our little man stops crying when Seth says, “Laura.” He pauses, like he’s waiting for the rest and Seth swears if he tells him some mushy story from when we first got together, he stops crying. He wants to hear the good stuff, that’s what Seth says.
Most importantly, he says so many times how much he loves us, the three of us.
I love us too. I love all of us and although it hurts how we got here; I’m so grateful that we did get here. This is all I ever wanted. To love and be loved and share that love with our little prince.
“Can we name him Cameron?” I ask Seth. Judging by the way he peers at me, with long-ago memories in his eyes, I think he knows why. “I just feel like…” My throat’s tight and I want to cry just thinking about Cami.
I don’t remember much, barely anything at all really. A month went by and all I did was sleep. There’s some part of me though that feels like she was holding my hand. Like I wouldn’t have gotten through any of this without her. Maybe I just miss her that much. Maybe there’s more to it, I don’t know. “I just want to remember her always and honor her in a way… is that… I don’t know. It’s—”
“I love it,” Seth says, cutting me off, kissing my cheek and preventing me from crying even more. “Yes. Yes, let’s name him Cameron.”
Seth
“You’re growing so fast,” I say and my words are lost since they’re whispered to a sleeping baby boy. Even though he’s dreaming, he holds my thumb with all his might. His wrists are chubby, his cheeks full. He’s gaining weight and the pediatrician is happy with his progress.
We’re in the clear. It took three more days after Laura’s release, but we’re finally able to breathe now that we’re in the clear.
I never knew how much relief those words would bring me, doctors telling us we can all go home. Bring us.
“I love it when he holds my fingers like that.” Laura’s comment is gentle and comes from the open door to the nursery.
In only her silk robe that clings to her curves, she tempts me like she never has. Seeing her with our baby boy, little Cameron, makes me ache for her.
I’m already hard by the time her eyes move from Cameron to my gaze. She must know because even with only the faint light from the hallway behind her, I can see her blush rise up from her cheeks to her temple.
“You’re impossible,” she huffs humorlessly, wrapping her arms around her front. Her bare feet pad on the floor as she comes to me, although I know it’s only to scoop up Cameron into her arms.
We have another week before sex is an option. I am counting down every fucking hour.
She teases me even more, taking Cameron from me, but settling down into my lap. With my arms wrapped around her, I keep her close to me, smelling her fragrant hair as I sigh easily.
I never knew how badly I wanted this. Her with me and a child too. A family.
It’s more important than anything else, which is why I’m continuing to lay low, only running the bar for the Cross brothers… indefinitely. I don’t ever want Laura or our son mixed up in anything else. So I took a step back and everyone was on board with that.
“I want a million more,” I comment and with my admission, our little prince stirs in Laura’s arms.
She only laughs, soft and easy. Her shoulders shake against my chest with it and then she rocks Cameron. I expect her to joke about another being too much or that I’m just ridiculous. She doesn’t though. “I do too,” she whispers.
“Could you not sleep?” I ask her.
“I got six hours straight,” she answers with a smile and then looks deep into my eyes, still rocking our baby as she adds, “I dreamed I was missing you two.”
A soft hum leaves me, vibrating down my chest and she snuggles in closer to me.
As much as I love this, as much as I want to live in this moment forever, I know what day it is.
The reminder makes me hold Laura closer to me. I kiss her temple, her hair tickling my nose when I do, trying not to think about what’s going on outside these walls.
I want to stay here forever with her. In love with her and loved by her.
Declan told me it was all right. He said the note told him he had to go alone and there was nothing I could do. Still, I want to know what happens. I need to know this shit with Marcus is over. Forever.
I got my happily ever after, but I don’t know at what cost.
“You all right?” Laura’s question brings me back to this moment and it’s then that I realize my heart is racing with fear for Declan.
“Fine,” I lie to her and kiss the tip of her nose. She shouldn’t worry, not when I don’t know what to tell her.
“I love you, Laura,” I tell her rather than confess my fear. “I would do anything for you.”
She has no idea how much I mean it. I’d sacrifice everything for her.
“I know,” she answers with a soft smile on her lips as Cameron coos in her arms. “I love you too.”
“You need to sleep,” I comment, noting how our little prince is falling asleep in her arms. “Let him sleep and you get into bed.”
“I’m not tired,” she protests and I’d smack her ass if it wasn’t firmly in my lap right now.
“You will be when I’m done with you,” I whisper at the shell of her ear. Her eyes close and her breath hitches.
“But we can’t—”
“I know what we can and can’t do,” I say, cutting her off. “I’m far too aware.”
As quiet as can be, she sets our son down in his crib, giving him one last look before peering back at me. She catches me standing up and her gaze goes straight to my cock. I’m so fucking hard for her. I take my time closing the distance, watching that rosy color in her cheeks grow.
Cupping her cheek in my hand, I press my lips to hers and then give her one last warning. “Get your ass on that bed, Babygirl.”
I don’t have to swat her ass, because she immediately turns around, making her way to our bedroom. I do anyway though, a slap that makes her gasp that sweet sound. The smile’s wide on her beautiful face and there’s a happiness and a lightness in her step that I haven’t seen in so long.
She’s mine forever like this. And I’ll make damn sure it stays that way.
Marcus
He came alone like I knew he would.
The youngest of the Cross brothers has always been the most trusting. He doesn’t remember the events of his past like the others do. He didn’t have to go through it like they did. That’s the only explanation I have for his trust in me.
He shouldn’t trust me. No one should. Just like I don’t trust a damn one of them.
Seth didn’t trust me either, but he sure as hell was willing to make a deal.
He may think I didn’t follow up on our arrangement, oh, but I did.
Little Audrey, with her long blonde hair, would have killed herself so many times before. She begged for death and her tragic story pleaded for me to let her let go in the years I’ve known her. In an effort to convince her otherwise, an effort for her to see the greater good, I told her she couldn’t do it, unless her death became someone else’s miracle.
It worked for a while… until she happened upon Laura. She found a picture online of two girls. O
ne that looked like her and the other was Laura Roth.
She was too wise for her age. Finding Laura and knowing she could save her was the way out she’d been hunting for years. She said it was a sign.
It certainly gave me leverage, but if I could have saved Audrey, I would have. I tried. Some souls are just too far gone.
Audrey’s death, her suicide, hurt me more than anyone would ever know, even if she did save a life.
Seth got what I promised him and it killed me to allow it, to tell Audrey the moment I knew about the accident. But I won’t hold him to our deal. It wasn’t for him anyway. It was a test of his dear friend.
Declan steps closer to a stone carved with his own last name on it. His brother’s first. The dried leaves beneath his feet crack and crumble.
Declan came to me for this. He came months ago wanting something I didn’t know if he deserved… So I tested him.
No man would allow the woman he loves to die. Seth could never say no. He would have done anything for her. I allowed Declan to know. I let them plant the wires, I let them listen in as I offered the deal.
He knew his best friend was made an offer he couldn’t resist. Declan knew Seth had to kill him in order to save the woman he loved.
After seeing what happened…
Declan deserves what he asked for and I’ll give it to him.
I do have regrets, for the pain it put Seth through, but that’s on Declan. Not on me. All of these men, they want, want, want, but I have never gotten what I wanted. Not until now.
Snow gathers in the sky, making it a cloudy gray to blanket the darkening evening. The chill is biting and it reminds me of the night everything changed for me.
The night I met her.
A stream of light descends between us and it casts his shadow long against the stone and grass that litter the graveyard. More importantly, the light gleams from the metal in his hand.
I’m certain his gun is loaded. Maybe he has less trust than I thought he did.
No matter. If he thought I’d let it end like this, he thought wrong.
“Declan.” I call out his name before he can leave. His back is to me, his shoulders tight and tense. So at odds compared to my easy posture.
He doesn’t turn around, which only brings the corners of my lips up into a smirk.
“I have one last deal to offer.” One more. Because I have to. “I know something you don’t. Something you really, desperately want to know.”
“What is it?”
“Turn around, Declan.”
“Are you going to kill me?”
“No,” I answer him and a nervousness rolls up my spine, coupled with a sickness in my stomach. It’s been so long since someone’s learned who I am.
It’s a risk, but one I have to take. I need to for her.
She begged me for this.
Declan’s slow to turn and face me. The recognition lights in his eyes, his expression turning from stone to one of confusion and then quickly, betrayal.
I give him a moment and he speaks a single word. “You?”
Marcus’s story, This Love Hurts, is up next. Pre Order your copy today!
For an extended epilogue of Laura and Seth’s story, sign up for my newsletter. Spoiler alert, she got a baby shower, even if it was a little late. xoxo
There are many moving parts in this whole world. If you haven’t read Carter’s saga, starting with Merciless, I highly suggest you do that now. His story is just as intense and a tale that will stay with me forever. I hope these words stay with you as well. Keep reading for a sneak peek!
Here’s to love stories keeping our hearts beating.
The timeline of the Merciless world is as follows:
Sebastian’s story: A Kiss to Tell, A Kiss To Keep
Daniel’s story: Possessive, Seductive
Carter’s story: The Merciless Series (Merciless, Heartless, Breathless , Endless )
Jase’s story: Irresistible Attraction Trilogy (A Single Glance, A Single Kiss & A Single Touch)
Seth’s story: (Hard to Love, Desperate to Touch, Tempted to Kiss & Easy to Fall)
Marcus’ story: This Love Hurts
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Unedited Sneak Peek at This Love Hurts
Prologue
Delilah
His gaze is piercing; he has the sharpest of blue eyes. As I freeze where I’m standing in the middle of the aisle, the faint noise of dull music mixed with the sound of carts rolling by fades. It all blurs in aisle four of the grocery store as my grip on the loaf of bread turns so clammy that the plastic slips.
The pitter patter of my racing heart and my blood rushing in my ears is all I can hear.
Nothing else matters.
I take my time though, placing the items back. There are only four of them, a bag of rice being the first to go back on the bottom shelf before I slowly, meticulously, roll my cart through the only aisle I’ve been down.
It’s chilling, the fear that rolls down my spine. Is it fear, though? My heart beats the question, wildly fighting against the decision to act calm. It’s not afraid, not like my logical side is. When the shadow is just barely seen, tall and foreboding as the wheels squeak against the linoleum floor and the clang of metal from one cart being pushed into the row of them, my stomach drops and my heart flips with recognition.
“Do you need any help?” a young man, in a red vest that barely hides the nondescript black logo on his white shirt beneath it, asks me. I recognize him; I’ve seen him a number of times in this grocery store. I’m certain he’s rung me up a handful of times since I’ve moved back here a month ago.
How did I think I could move back, even if the house is on the outskirts in the middle of nowhere, and he wouldn’t find me? How could I be so foolish to think he wouldn’t come for me.
A sinking feeling in my chest moves my hand there, and the paper list in my hand crinkles as I do.
“Oh no,” my throat is too tight as I speak. I close my eyes, forcing a childish smile and clear my throat. “I just realized,” I answer him, finally looking the young man in his deep brown eyes. “I have a call in ten minutes and I’m going to take it in my car then come back,” I lie, that smile staying in place although everything in my body wants me to run. Run from here, get away from other people.
There’s no point in running though; I know better than that.
The young man, college age or younger offers me a smile in return. “Understood,” he says with a nod and returns to moving a smaller stack of carts in line with the one I’ve just left my own in.
Even now, as I take each deliberate step through the automatic, glass double-doors and feel the cool breeze of early spring against my heated face, I try to rid the memories that flash before my eyes.
The bar. The drinks. The court cases and late nights of getting lost in bed with a man I knew I shouldn’t be with.
My heels click as I remember losing my license, as every dreadful moment returns with the stain of blood. So much blood.
Wrapping my arms around me, I protect my body from the wind but it’s useless. The weather isn’t what batters me.
His lips on mine, the searing of his touch, forces a gasp from me, a short one in longing. Knowing those moments are lost ghosts of the person I was. The people we were.
All of the memories are a cocktail that infuse into my conscious thought as I listen to my keys clink and unlock the door to my sedan with a low beep that fills the practically vacant lot. From the time I entered the grocery store, to now, a mere fifteen minutes at that, the sun decide to set, casting a shade of red across the dark tree l
ine of thick forest beyond the store parking lot and stealing the light was here only just a moment ago.
The leather seat groans and the door shuts with a loud thud. All I can do is sit there, my purse now on the console. My keys in my right hand, resting against my lap. And my breathing coming in faster and faster although I’m doing everything in my power to stay calm.
When I hear the click of the back door opening, the one behind my driver seat, I close my eyes. He didn’t make me wait long.
He enters the car with a chill from the evening wind and the car rocks gently until he’s seated behind me and the door is shut.
When I open my eyes, his steely gaze is on mine in the rearview and my treacherous heart chokes me in an attempt to escape. It stays at the base of my throat, pounding viciously in protest.
I did always love him. There wasn’t a moment that I didn’t love him.
“You said you’d let me go,” I whisper, speaking over my strangled breaths.
My gaze never leaves his, even as tears prick my eyes. Not until he answers me.
“I changed my mind.”
This Love Hurts is coming this May. Pre Order your copy today!
Sneak Peek at Merciless
From USA Today bestselling author W Winters comes a heart-wrenching, edge-of-your-seat gripping, romantic suspense.
I should’ve known she would ruin me the moment I saw her.
Women like her are made to destroy men like me.
I couldn’t resist her though.