by Arizona Tape
She bit her lip and batted her eyes down. “Terribly…”
“Oh, Heather… Why didn’t you say so?”
“Why did you never ask?”
Any other questions I wanted to ask, stuck in my mouth. She was right. I never asked. I always assumed she was lost, that she didn’t have a home, that she was looking for someone to ease her mind, fill her heart, complete her soul. I never asked myself if what I saw in her wasn’t just a reflection of me. My needs, my wants, my feelings, my emptiness.
Hesitantly, I studied the young woman in front of me as I rethought all our time together. About what I assumed was two people connecting, but maybe I’d been wrong. Maybe I made it all up.
I took a deep breath, a calm feeling settled into my body, and a sudden clarity enlightened my mind. And I finally found the words I should have said a long time ago. “I’m so sorry, Heather,” I whispered, my voice barely audible. “I’m sorry for keeping you from your home, for making you stay in a hostile world, for not treating you with enough kindness, for taking you for granted, for forcing you to —” I swallowed a big lump. “… Forcing you to be with me.”
I caught her eyes and I found more turmoil gushing around. “Don’t apologise. You did what you thought was best…”
“But I thought wrong… Didn’t I?” I asked, immediately regretting my question. I wasn’t ready for her to tell me that she was over me… That what we had, hadn’t been that great at all.
“I… Ade… “
“You can tell me, I can take it.”
Lie.
“I know… It’s not that…”
“Then what?”
“I…” Another internal battle flashed through her eyes. “What we had… It was real…” she admitted quietly, her eyes locked firmly on the ground. My heart skipped a beat, my palms sweaty. Did I hear that right?
“It was real for me too…” I tried to say, but instead of hearing my sentence roll off my tongue, I heard a gurgling ‘errrr’ leave my mouth. Great.
“The vampire world was hostile and foreign, yet you managed to make me feel… Safe…” she murmured, her eyes finally leaving the ground and meeting mine. Her dark blue oceans were warm, like gentle waves crashing against the shores of a peaceful beach.
I swallowed the lump that had been stuck in my throat for months now and slowly approached. Carefully, making sure not to startle her. Having her flinch away from me would hurt more than I’d care to admit.
But she didn’t, she stood immovably still until I was only a foot away from her. I could feel her heat radiate onto me, the familiar sensation warming me up immediately. I wanted to kiss her so badly, but the moment didn’t feel right. She was staring too intensely at me, watching my every move, curious to what I would do next. So instead of kissing her, I lifted my hand and tenderly brushed a lock of hair away. My fingertips grazed lightly over her cheek, like butterflies. She briefly closed her eyes and I felt her head tilt towards my hand, a shy smile playing on her lips.
A whisper. “I missed you.”
A smile tugged on my lips and her warmth spread from my fingers through my arm, into my chest. Further and further, until my whole body radiated her.
“You… You did?” I asked, my voice breaking.
“I did. I don’t think I realised how much I had actually fallen in love with you.”
“Oh…” A breath escaped my mouth as I stared speechlessly at her. She was always an expert in jumping from one mood into the other. Some things never changed, after all.
“Your world, it’s not made for me. It’s too fast, too hard. I would’ve never fit in, we both know that… But yet, I connected with you. You treated me with an unexpected kindness.”
“I wasn’t trying to be kind, I was trying to charm you” I pointed out, cringing at my own words. Why did I say that?
“You were?”
“Yes.”
She squinted and tilted her head. “Why?”
“Because I liked you?”
“Oh.”
Now it was my turn to squint my eyes. “Wasn’t that clear?”
“Ummm… No?”
“Oh… Well, I did. Do.”
“Do?”
I ran a hand through my hair and looked at her surprised face. Had she not expected that? Hadn’t I been clear on my feelings? “Yes, I never stopped.”
She slowly turned around and for a moment, I feared I’d chased her away. With my words, with my presence… With me. I opened my mouth, hoping to find the words to make her stay, but she stopped me right in my tracks.
“You showed me your world… Allow me to show you mine.”
What? She was going to show me her world? The human world? Why? What? How? My confusion must’ve been clear on my face as she answered all of my questions before I had a chance to spew them out.
“You always wanted to know everything about my world. And here you are again, so you must have thought about me a lot. Must have missed me. And I know you’re filled with scientific curiosity, but you didn’t learn as much as you could. You were too kind and set me free. So I’ll return the favour, call it my way of saying thank you.”
I felt a smile tug on the corners of my mouth, my chest lighter than it’d been in months. Not only would I get to see the human settlement, I’d get to spend time with Heather again.
“Just one thing...” she trailed off, a concerned look in her eyes.
“Yes?” I coughed, finally regaining my ability to speak.
“Down… We’re not that fond of vampires… So people can’t find out you are one. It would cause chaos and panic and it wouldn’t end well for you.”
“What?” I asked, not believing how the tables had turned all of a sudden. “You want me to pretend I’m… Human…?”
“Yes… And don’t say that word with so much disdain.”
“I’m not, I’m just… Look at me, I don’t look like—”
She cut me off. “You don’t look so average like us? You’re right, you would attract too much attention with your high cheekbones, bright eyes, flawless skin…”
“Oh…” I blushed, my cheeks heating up from her compliments.
“Wait, come here…” she muttered, bowing down so she could swipe her fingers over the ground. Her forehead frowned in concentration as she brushed the dirt over my cheeks, her lips dangerously close to mine. I studied her face, basking in the feel of her skin against mine. How I missed that. How I missed her. She was close, oh so close. But not close enough. No, if only I could lean in and press a long-wanted kiss on her lips. Just a little one, just so I could feel her against me.
Involuntarily, I gravitated towards her. My lips inching closer and closer, my breath hitched in my throat. Maybe, maybe, maybe… Just when I thought I couldn’t control myself anymore, she moved back, breaking the tension between us, releasing me from my trance.
“There you go, that looks a bit better,” she breathed, awkwardly scratching the back of her head. She must’ve felt the sparks between us, she had to. But there was probably a good reason she wasn’t acting on it and I should respect that.
“Good,” I muttered, burying my disappointment with extra cheer.
“I’m not joking around though. If people realised you come from above, it would cause a massive panic and they would attack you.”
I nodded so she knew I heard her, but I wasn’t worrying too much. I knew I could easily fight off any human trying to harm me.
“I know you’re strong, but a horde of humans is not to be underestimated. They could trample you.”
She was right, that would be inconvenient and dangerous. Not for me, but for Heather. If she got caught in the middle, she would certainly bear the consequences of it. And I couldn’t have that. No, I would just have to make sure to go as unnoticed as possible, and not draw attention to myself.
“It should be fine, I managed to go unnoticed in your world, so you should be able to do the same?”
“I hope so…” If I didn’t pass for a h
uman, it could be fatal for my girl. Seemed like no matter which world we were in, there was always danger lurking around the corner.
She extended her hand, her palm up and her eyes boring straight into mine. “Do you trust me?”
Chapter 3: Rain
I looked at her open hand and reverted my eyes back up to hers. They were still staring at me, an unasked question lingering in them. Her emotions swirled untainted and unchained through them. Flecks of hope and strands of affection. An iris filled with love and blue oceans of trust. And as much as I wanted to, I couldn’t take her hand.
I swallowed a lump and shook my head. “I can’t,” I whispered breathlessly, even though the rest of my entire being said otherwise.
“Why not?” she voiced, the spark in her eyes flickering out. I could tell she was trying to keep her voice steady, but the hurt laced through it was unmistakable.
“I… I just can’t…” I muttered, my brain refusing what my heart was yearning for. Heather looked at me, the warmth in her eyes disappearing and I could see the ice forming. I let out a slow breath, trying to keep my emotions under control. “I just… If I see your world, my authorities could find you. They’ve been looking for you and believe me, what they were planning on doing to you… It wasn’t, isn’t pleasant in the slightest. I’m not compromising your safety for my own desires,” I tried to explain, hoping I was making any sense. She swallowed visibly and I stared into her eyes, praying she understood. She clenched her jaw and nodded her head in reluctance.
“I’m just concerned,” I muttered, tearing my gaze away from hers.
“I know,” she breathed.
“If I come with you, there is a chance they’d be able to trace my scent to yours.”
“Would they recognise it?”
“I know it by heart.” The words left my mouth before I could stop myself, but she did have a good point. I was able to track her scent because it was embedded in my senses, but that didn’t mean anyone could. Our world was filled with scents and smells, and we filtered through them, the way we filtered the noise. Heather, her scent was odd, but to the council it was just as strange as any other person’s scent.
“But they might not be able to track it?” I trailed off, balancing out the risks.
“So, are you coming with or not?”
“I…” I looked at her face, deep into the pools of her eyes, and shook my head. “No.”
“But I want to show you my world,” she whispered, her hand still lingering in the air, her eyes hopeful and her voice soft.
“I want to see your world, but I can’t… They might not recognise your scent, but they know mine.”
“Then how do I make you smell differently?” she asked, and I could swear I heard a sexual undertone, but this was not the time to visit that idea.
“You can’t, but there’s one thing that can erase it. Rain.”
She frowned and just as she opened her mouth to ask me to elaborate, I explained myself.
“It will cleanse the earth and wipe away my scent. If I’m here when it rains, I can follow you to wherever you’re willing to lead me.”
Heather nodded and smiled. “Okay… So then we wait.”
“Wait?”
“Yes, wait.”
“Hold on. We wait until it rains?”
A strange smile played around her lips. “Yes.”
“Here?”
“Well, we can go inside the building.”
“Errr…”
“You have a better idea?”
“Errm... No,” I admitted reluctantly.
“Let’s go then,” she said, her hand reaching out to me again. And this time, I slipped my hand in hers, my cold fingers intertwining with her warm ones. A white cloud of smoke left her lips as she released the breath trapped in her chest.
“Lead the way, dear,” I whispered, the endearment slipping out of my mouth, surprising myself as much as her.
She raised an eyebrow. “Did you just call me dear?”
My cheeks heated up in embarrassment.“Yes, I did.”
“Oh.”
“You don’t like?” I asked, and even though I hadn’t meant to, it would still be painful if she hated it.
Heather brushed her blonde hair out of her face. “No, I do. Say it again.”
“Dear?”
“Yes, I definitely like it,” Heather smiled, making my heart flutter.
“Good,” I grinned, a big smile beaming on my face for the first time in months. And without any more words, I tightened my grip as we silently walked towards the building. Even I could feel the cold bite into my skin, so finding a warmer spot would be good for my vulnerable human. The building shrieked as the wind raged through the empty rooms, but we managed to find a relatively wind-free and slightly warmer spot. Awkwardly, I leant against the wall and inspected Heather. She really was just as beautiful as in my head.
“So…. Ummm... Ade?”
“Yes?”
“Would you hug me? I’m cold,” she shyly asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
I ignored the heat spreading through my chest and nodded. “Of course… Come closer.”
“I'm close.”
And she was. All I needed to do, was take a little step towards her. I tenderly brought my hand to her face and wiped some stray strands of hair that the wind pulled out of her ponytail. My other hand found her hip and I slowly pulled her against me, into me. She buried her face in my shoulder and wrapped her hands gingerly around my waist. Butterflies rose from my stomach as I pulled her harder into me, closer into me. My senses rejoiced as I breathed in the familiar scent that I’d come to associate with home.
She slowly relaxed in my arms, her head turning so her soft lips found my cheek. I hid the smile forming on my face by pressing a soft kiss on her forehead. How I missed this. Her.
And so we stood, wrapped up in each other embrace, our breaths shared, our bodies entangled, our hearts linked together. Inhaling each other’s scent, listening to each others breathing, time standing still. And we waited, waited for an eternity, until rain fell from the sky and hit the earth, wiping away any traces of us.
Slowly, I unwrapped myself from Heather and this time, I held out my hand, wordlessly asking for her to take it. A glint played on her lips and without any hesitation, she did. We walked to the exit of the building and stood where the door used to be. Still protected by the roof, yet so close to the rain that I could feel little drops splash off the ground up to our lower legs.
Heather looked at me, a twinkle in her eyes. “Do you want to?”
I faced her too and grinned. “Definitely.”
Her eyes turned soft. “Do you want me.”
Even though it sounded like a question, it wasn’t. “Yes,” I responded, loving how a smile stretched across her face and the pools in her eyes became a little deeper.
She leant in and whispered. “Then catch me…” And with those words, her hand slipped out of mine and with a laugh clear as crystal, she ran into the pouring rain. I should have given her a head start, but not a hair on my body wanted her to get further away from me than she already was. So I ran after her, her laugh and scent guiding me to her even if I were blind.
She was running towards the forest, looking back to check how close I was and at that moment, I was reminded of our first meeting, how she had run away from me and how I had grabbed her so she couldn’t escape. To a stranger, this would have looked exactly the same, but both Heather and I knew this was something completely different. This time she wanted to be caught.
So that was what I did. Not unlike the first time, I grabbed her by her waist but much more gently. And this time, she wasn’t screaming to get away. Instead, a warm smile danced across her pink lips.
“Got you…” I whispered in her ear, my breath softly blowing over her skin.
“Yes, you got me,” she whispered back, her voice sending goosebumps and shivers down my spine. She pressed herself harder into me and let out a throaty chuckle. I
brushed the rain from her skin, surprised by how warm she felt. We were soaked, our clothes heavy from the water, our hair wet with drops sliding down our faces. She looked at me, her gaze so intense I almost couldn’t take it. It almost made me run in the opposite direction. But I didn’t. Instead I returned it with the same intensity, allowing myself to feel something I hadn’t in a long time. And with the rain still pouring down on us, I placed my lips softly on hers, sealing an unspoken promise.
She sighed into my mouth, temporarily sharing her breath with me. As gently as I could, I caressed her face as she parted her lips to grant me access. Without any hesitation, I deepened our kiss, wrapping my tongue eagerly around hers so I could finally greet my lover properly.
For a moment, she pulled back. Just enough to allow a breath to pass through our lips. Softly, she murmured my name before crashing her lips hard onto mine. Passion bubbled up from deep within me and I allowed it to surface as I answered her kiss. With Heather pressed into me and rain cascading down onto us, I allowed myself to feel. I no longer wanted to be empty, I wanted her. Only her. And for once, it felt like the world was encouraging me.
The rain pouring from the sky was washing away any signs or traces of us, almost as if we never even met or existed on this earth. Yet nothing felt more real than her, us, right here, right now. And so, I kissed Heather again as the rain painted a fresh start for us.
Chapter 4: Underground
Heather shivered in my arms so I pulled her into the forest, where the branches and leaves gave us some cover. She intertwined our hands and tugged me deeper and deeper into the woods, further away from civilisation. The roof of leaves got thicker and barely any rain managed to make it through. I’d never been this deep into the forest, or what we called a forest anyway. Technically, it was just one tree. One big ass tree, to be exact. The biggest of the willow family and it had been standing here for as long as we could remember. Over the years, its branches had grown so long and heavy, they extended back to the earth where they sprung new roots. The whole tree extended from shore to shore and was the biggest forest area in our world. Not surprising, there were only two of those areas on the planet left, including this one.