Shadow Of A Mate

by SA Welsh

  Jay stared back at him, eyes shining.

  “Why did you do it?”

  Jay tried to pull back, but he refused to let go. If this was a dream Kyle wasn’t going to waste a second of it by not touching Jay.

  “You know why. I’d do it again,” Jay whispered, breaking Kyle’s heart in the process.

  Kyle’s eyebrows scrunched together as he frowned in surprise. “How can you say that?”

  “Nikko is alive, your brother and Mam’s son. They’ll get to have the mother and son relationship they should always have had—” Jay continued talking about how it was the right thing to do and while Kyle understood it to a degree, the irrational side of him just couldn’t wrap his brain around what Jay had done.

  “But what about the relationship we have? Do you have any idea how much I need you or how much people at home care about you?”

  Jay looked stunned at the anger in his voice, but Kyle wasn’t done yet. “I don’t understand how you could leave me. My heart beats for you and you just threw it away,” he croaked brokenly.

  Jay’s arms came around him and Kyle lost the ability to think under the crashing waves of relief, fear, sadness and elation that swirled around and inside him. There were so many contradicting emotions he was left spent and confused, clinging to Jay like a life raft. He didn’t know what to do, how to fix it.

  Jay was so much smaller than him but Kyle always knew that inside him, Jay had a heart so big it wouldn’t allow anyone to hurt what or who belonged to him. Jay was his rock, his one constant touchstone.

  “It’s going to be ok. I love you. I never meant to leave you. You’re my mate, Ky. I’ve always loved you. How can you think I chose to leave?”

  “You just said you’d do it again!” Kyle ignored the wetness running down his cheeks as he glared accusingly at Jay.

  Jay pulled him up so they were standing and turned him around, moulding to his back. “Watch.”

  Kyle didn’t know what he was supposed to be watching or who Jay was talking to when his mate whispered something he couldn’t understand. Before him, what had simply been more white empty space morphed into some kind of window.

  “What...?” The question died on his lips as inside the window shape began to change and colour seeped in to a familiar scene. Slowly the window started to show Jay lying in bed as Kyle had left him. It was too much to take in when he could feel Jay’s arms around his waist, solid and warm. He didn’t want to believe it wasn’t real.

  “Look at them, Kyle.” Jay’s quiet order sent shivers over his skin but he did as he was told.

  Looking at the window again, Kyle saw Jay wasn’t the only one there. Mam, Papa and Nikko were clustered around the bed, all touching, whether holding hands or brushing shoulders. Papa sat on one side of the bed and Mam took up the other, each holding Jay’s hand with Nikko sitting cross-legged at the foot of the bed, hand on Jay’s foot.

  As he looked closer Kyle realised Kane was there, too, in feline form curled on top of Jay like a living blanket.

  “How could I not save him, Ky?”

  Kyle snorted, mad at himself and Jay and everyone else. “Don’t play that card with me. We both know you didn’t have a clue what would happen.”

  This wasn’t some miracle where everyone got to ride off into the sunset.

  Yes, it was amazing and wonderful that Nikko was alive and that his betas and Logan were healed, but they were living proof that Jay put himself last, thought himself less important.

  Jay let go of him and the window vanished as if it had never been there, the white, blank surroundings once again everywhere they could see.

  Good, get angry, he thought.

  “Why are you acting like this?” Jay’s big blue eyes and perfect blond hair was the last straw.

  Kyle snapped. “Because none of this is fucking real and I’m going to wake up and you’re going to be hundreds of miles away, dying and there’s nothing I can do to stop it, you stupid ass!”

  Jay gawped for a few seconds as Kyle panted, out of breath from yelling. His words echoed around the space and he turned away as his eyes stung. He would not cry over some stupid dream. He needed to keep his head in the game.

  The witch wouldn’t go down easy and falling apart over the perfect, safe and unscarred beauty of his mate in a dream would only be a distraction. One that could get him or one of his friends killed.

  “Oh, Ky.” Jay’s voice softened and Kyle spun to shout at dream Jay, to demand that Jay never put himself last again. But as he turned to face him, his mate’s hand grabbed his face and yanked him down into a hard kiss.

  Grasping Jay by the waist, he hauled the man closer, slamming their bodies together.

  He fell to his knees when Jay ducked out of the kiss and bit his ear. That was his sweet spot.

  Jay tortured him with more biting kisses all over his neck and jaw until Kyle couldn’t take it anymore and pulled Jay off him roughly, throwing his mate onto the white floor.

  He followed him down, covering Jay with his body, separating Jay’s legs with his knee and sinking into the space. He attacked Jay’s mouth, claiming kiss after kiss until he couldn’t breathe. Kyle growled when Jay pushed at his chest, not ready to give up his prize.

  “Kyle,” Jay cried breathlessly, hitting his chest.

  One powerful shove knocked Kyle off and he rolled up onto the balls of his feet, crouching and waiting for an opportunity to pounce again. He wasn’t going to lose his prey this easily. “Mine,” he growled, eyes shifting to cat and enhancing his vision so he could see the fine blond stubble on Jay’s cheek and jaw. He needed to lick that.

  “And you’re mine.”

  Jay waved a hand and all their clothes disappeared.

  The freedom as his hard cock was released from the unforgiving army issue combat pants was a relief. He was transfixed by Jay’s naked body. It felt like so long since they’d been together instead of only a day. The mate bond inside him flared and he could have sworn Jay pulsed in time to it, becoming more solid and iridescent.

  The temptation of Jay’s hard body was too much and he tensed, ready to strike.

  But he never got the chance as Jay pounced on him instead, rolling them over and taking control.

  “Where did this come from?” Kyle fingered the soft texture of the small mountain of velvety cushions that suddenly appeared beneath him.

  Jay sent him a playful leer that had his heart racing and made his cock harden to the point of pain. “I may have learned a thing or two since I’ve been here.”

  Kyle inhaled sharply when Jay pushed him flat and rocked forward, forcing Kyle’s erection to run along the seam of Jay’s ass cheeks. “Holy fuck, you feel good,” he moaned, shifting his hips up to rub himself against Jay some more.

  He tossed his head back into the pillows as something cool and slick trickled over his erection and stomach. How Jay was creating all this stuff was far beyond his brain capabilities to figure out at this moment. Kyle arched up, pushing his cock through the silky cheeks again to tap on Jay’s hole.

  When he opened his eyes, Kyle found himself looking deep into Jay’s and the world faded away, all the thought of outside the dream, all worries and pressures as well as the pain and unstable power. Everything that mattered was right in front of him, sitting on him.

  He had to have him. Now.

  Kyle let go of Jay’s waist and with one hand scooped up some of the lube, it had warmed up on his stomach so it wouldn’t cause Jay to make that lovely little gasp he loved to hear but it would still ease the way as he fucked his mate’s brains out. With his other hand, he palmed Jay’s ass, squeezing one cheek, then the other. That was a wondrous thing.

  He gripped one cheek firmly and lifted, opening Jay up as he dipped his lubricated fingers into Jay’s crack. First he teased them around the rim, smiling when Jay growled in frustration and pushed back against his fingers.

  “Stop teasing. Either fuck me or turn over and I’ll fuck you,” Jay snarled in his face, looki
ng every bit the fierce warrior with his blond hair ruffled out of the perfect placement and the guyliner smudged like war paint.

  Having Jay inside him was great but his jaguar really wanted to claim his mate. The reprieve from his newly boosted dominant side wasn’t exactly a welcome interference and the idyllic effect of the dream cracked. But Jay didn’t seem to mind as he gripped him tighter and began to growl softly.

  “Mine.” Kyle glared at Jay daring him to deny it.

  “Then claim me,” Jay challenged, chin tilting up.

  Kyle flipped them over, grabbing Jay by the ankles and throwing his mate’s legs over his shoulders. Jay was very flexible.

  He crowded close, covering Jay with his body.

  His jaguar insisted that they take him now, just drive into Jay’s welcoming heat until his mate was covered in his scent and no one would dare try to take him and Jay was too satisfied to even dream of seeking out another mate.

  But he shook his head, desperate to gather some control. He had to get Jay ready first otherwise he might hurt him. Jay liked the burn, but Kyle had no desire to hurt him.

  Jay seemed to know he was struggling and began smoothing hands up and down his arms. “It’s ok. I’m yours, you’re mine. Nothing can change that.”

  Kyle dropped his head so it rested against Jay’s, breathing raggedly.

  The lick of aggression faded and his jaguar bowed, submitting under Jay’s calm words. Kyle slowly moved his lubed hand back down Jay’s body, leaving a glistening trail. He smiled to himself as he took a breath and blew cool air over the wet trial.

  Jay jumped as if Kyle had struck him and shivered delightfully.

  “Not nice.” His mate glared at him, eyes narrowed but sparkling with amusement.

  “But funny,” Kyle argued.

  He scraped the last of the lube off his own stomach and proceeded to get Jay ready for him, stretching Jay with first one finger then two, pumping them in and out of Jay’s body. As he fingered his mate, Kyle reached down to tug on Jay’s cock.

  Soon Jay was able to take three fingers and Kyle tightened his hold on Jay’s hard dick when Jay twisted and gasped.

  “In me. Now,” Jay panted urgently, lifting his upper body off the cushions and grabbing onto Kyle’s neck.

  Kyle grunted and removed his fingers. The temptation was to bring Jay to the brink and tease him with the promise of orgasm. But something in Jay’s voice and eyes told him the dream might not last that long.

  He positioned himself so his cock fit against Jay’s ass and took a steadying breath. At this rate Kyle was going to have to book himself onto a Lamaze class or take up meditation with all the calming breaths he was having to do.

  He rocked forward just a little and the tip popped inside.

  The tight heat almost undid him. It was like this was the very first time all over again and he had no stamina, no control.

  Jay whined and wriggled, greedy for more and Kyle had to hold him still as he slowly sank deeper. All he wanted to do was hammer home and never leave again, but he restrained the urge.

  Jay’s hands clawed into his sides as his mate let out a guttural moan. “More.”

  Kyle gave him more, sheathing himself completely in Jay’s ass.

  His mate was almost bent in half with Kyle’s dick in his ass, but Jay was still running the show. Jay ruled him. Always had.

  “Yes!” Jay screamed in his ear as he pulled back and slammed forward.

  No words came out of his mouth when he tried to tell Jay that he loved him only an animalistic roar.

  Jay’s eyes flew wide and his mate roared back at him.

  The thin leash on his control snapped and Kyle was a slave to his body and the passion and need between them. Jay’s lynx-clawed fingers dug in to his shoulder and scraped down his back. The hot burning sting was exactly what he wanted.

  Jay tilted his head up and Kyle couldn’t resist nuzzling under his chin, sneaking his tongue out to get a taste of the smooth, salty skin.

  They both moaned as he started rotating his hips. He drove into Jay again and again until he felt the need for release begin to overtake everything else. He knew Jay was close. His mate made little grunting whines when he was almost ready to come.

  A few more thrusts and they were both making sounds that would have been familiar on the discovery channel. He was growling, Jay was snarling and it was magical. Both of them were fighting for release. Jay switched up their positions, taking over before Kyle could even argue about it. When Jay began bouncing on his cock, dragging claws lightly over his chest Kyle forgot why he wanted to protest at all.

  Jay’s movement became more frenzied and Kyle roared until he ran out of breath as Jay swooped down and bit him, teeth clamping on to his neck. He came hard and fast, shooting inside Jay but his cock didn’t deflate, he was still hard and aching.

  Kyle rolled them again, flipping their positions so Jay was back on the bottom and thrust through his orgasm, blind to anything but his pleasure and giving Jay the same rush. With Jay’s teeth in his neck, he pounded into his mate until Jay pulled him down on top on him and hot liquid splashed over his chest.

  Gasping for breath, Jay released his bite, but Kyle stole it again in a kiss. He teased his tongue along Jay’s purring at the familiar taste. He slowed his thrusts until he rocked gently against Jay.

  Despite just coming Jay stayed as erect as him. Jay bucked against him and sighed into their kiss. It was like coming home.

  Unfortunately breathing required air and the kiss had to end. Kyle’s eyes fluttered open and his gaze connected with Jay’s. He was never one for poetry and pretty words, Jay was much better at that than him, but right then he was inspired enough to write a sonnet. Jay was like the sun and Kyle just revolved around him, basking in his warmth and beauty.

  He kept the slow rhythm as sweat ran down his back and hair clung to his face. He stared down at Jay in wonder as his mate flung his head back and arched beneath him. He still couldn’t believe how lucky he was. Jay was his.

  They came together this time, crying out and locking stares. They saw each other at their most vulnerable, most open, and Kyle sighed as the mate bond throbbed with energy, tying them closer together as it fed on their emotions.

  The high and afterglow faded far too soon. His thoughts turned dark as he remembered the reality awaiting him. The reality where Jay was dying, leaving him again.

  No. No witch was going to take this from him.

  “Kyle?” The note of worry in Jay’s voice was at odds with the relaxed, cuddly state Jay was in, running slow caresses over Kyle’s back.

  He didn’t answer Jay, simply shook his head and tried to dispel the bleak voice in the back of his mind. No matter how hard he concentrated on the here and now, something kept dragging him back to the fact that this was a dream.

  “Kyle, stay with me. Please. Don’t go, not yet.” Jay grabbed at him, but Kyle was swept away in a river of doubt and fear. He furiously tried to cling on to Jay, but his hands slipped right through Jay’s body like smoke.

  Kyle groaned as he felt someone shaking his shoulder. “Wake up, we’re getting ready to descend.” Tryst’s voice in his ear didn’t improve his mood. He blinked, looking around to find himself back on the plane, far away from Jay.

  All he wanted to do was go back to sleep and be with Jay again. He had no idea if any of it was real, but that didn’t matter. Nothing could touch them or hurt them in a dream, Jay was safe. Wasn’t he?

  So why did he seem so scared when Kyle left?

  The mate bond was a mystical thing not many people understood and apart from when Jay had saved him from a hunter it had remained stubbornly quiet. He’d put it down to them being young and not having had time to really connect with a crisis around every corner.

  That it pulsed like a living thing now in his chest contradicted that.

  If the bond was so vibrant then as far as Kyle knew either he or Jay must have reached out to it and used it as a bridge. He knew he hadn�
�t for fear the feedback would hurt Jay.

  So Jay must have.

  Tentatively he reached up to his neck, scared to hope.

  But when his fingers drifted across indented, tender skin, he could have wept.

  Jay was alive. Aware.

  Kyle closed his eyes and traced his fingers over Jay’s claiming bite mark over and over again. Every time he touched it, the bond vibrated happily.

  Chapter Five

  “Holy fuck.”

  Mack’s gasp drove his attention out of the window to the landscape below and his relaxed, relieved moment of happiness disintegrated. He’d been hoping Logan’s map was wrong or exaggerated. They were still high enough that they couldn’t make out details of the landscape below, but the general layout, green land and blue water and so on could still be discerned.

  “Where exactly are we heading?” Tryst sounded like he could already guess, but needed confirmation. Kyle wanted to know as well. The ground below looked like it would be challenging at the best of times, let alone under a tight timeframe.

  Logan glanced out of the window briefly before standing up and heading to Tryst’s chair, leaning over the leopard to point out of that window instead. “We have to land there on the outer part of the city because there are no other secured areas to do it where we wouldn’t be detected and probably arrested or end up victim to one of mother’s traps. The swampy area there, next to the beige stretch of land is the first part we need to get through. Mother spelled everywhere around her home for miles and miles so she’d never be caught vulnerable.”

  Logan paused, letting them all soak that in and Kyle stared at the area Logan had described. “A few people have tried to get to her before now. No one made it through the swamp.”

  “How can she spell a desert, swamp and jungle next to the city without anyone noticing?” Mack’s nose scrunched up. Leopard shifters weren’t fond of deserts.

  “You grease the right people’s palms and you can get away with anything. I think the mayor is blaming it on global warming.” Logan frowned and pointed out another part that was coming into view as the plane ducked lower in its descent.