by Sam Destiny
Nothing else ever had been able to, but Leila’s innocence and trust meant the world to him. She didn’t know or understand about assholes and angels yet, and if you were nice to her, she rewarded you with loyalty and smiles. The scene at the airport had proven that.
“And you probably want to fuck her mother, but that doesn’t mean you need to take care of the brat. Thomas, listen to me.” She framed his face and leaned in slightly. “If you think you want a family, find yourself a girl who’s ready for it, have the baby and then play family, but don’t come running to me. You’re better than that. Having a child means you’ll never again be free.”
“Thanks, Mother,” he replied, standing. He’d heard the sentence so often and yet, it hurt again each time she dropped it.
“Don’t be dramatic. Sit, boy. Love is just a hindrance.”
He swallowed, knowing he’d regret his next words. “You’ve never been in love, have you?” He didn’t know if he’d been, but he had a feeling he had an idea how it felt, and none of it really seemed to be a hindrance for him.
“Oh please. Making yourself vulnerable? What if that girl you are so hung up on grabs your colleague and kisses him? You’d be crushed because you had the illusion something would come out of it. But you should know better. You were not made for love. You get what you need from a woman and then move on. It’s what I taught you. Loyalty is reserved for your friends, because those won’t as easily abandon you. Women—”
“Not all women are like you, Mom. They don’t just search for cock.”
His mother cackled and he closed his eyes. Maybe, if they’d have a better relationship, he could ask her what broke her so utterly and completely that she was the way she was, but he didn’t and wasn’t sure he ever wanted to.
“Do not call me a slut, son,” she fussed and he stood again.
“Why not? It’s what you are. Yes, you don’t bring them home, but you don’t go back for seconds, and—”
The slap she gave him echoed through the silence of the house and he lowered his eyes. It wasn’t the first time this happened, either.
“If I ever have a child, or a wife, I’ll tell them my mother moved far, far away, and we cannot ever visit her. Just so you know.”
He passed her, stepping back into the dark hallway.
“I never asked you to come here today, and I certainly never want to see you with a child or a wife. It’ll ruin you, my perfectly good son!” she called after him and he let the door fall closed behind him, pausing in the overgrown yard…or rather what was called a yard in that area but really wasn’t much more than two steps of weeds.
Was it too hard to ask for a few encouraging words, for a small show of affection? She was his mother, for fuck’s sake, and he couldn’t remember if she’d ever bothered to touch or hold him.
It proved again that feeding and clothing a child sometimes wasn’t enough. He was messed up because of his mother, and wondered if he’d even be able to have a fully functioning relationship—or family.
What if he messed up like she had?
You’re already changing, his heart whispered.
Nothing can get that rotten shit out of you, his mind insisted.
Getting into his truck, Tank turned the music up until he couldn’t hear his own thoughts anymore in the tiny space, and only then did he exhale slowly.
The office they’d gotten for her was tiny, almost a joke, and Evy couldn’t believe how far her asshole one night stand would go to make her life hell. It had a desk, a chair, a computer and Internet, and that was about it. No phone, no lamp, no nothing.
Hell, there weren’t even pens on the desk. Not that you could really call it a desk. It actually was just a wooden board and four legs attached—or looked like it, because when she tried moving it, it proved to be rather heavy.
Her English cell rang just as she was about to open her laptop.
“Jackson?” she asked, not being able to recognize the number since it was a private one.
“Miss Jackson, all the way on the other side of the world. Have you started on the project yet?”
Ian.
She gritted her teeth and refrained from snapping at him, or making stupid comments.
“It’s nice of you to check in on me, Mr. Lanestrong. I’m just at the office, ready to print all I need to go and talk to—”
“Tick tock, Miss Jackson. I’m expecting a positive report in a few days. That shouldn’t be a problem, right? Did you talk to you friend already?”
“Of course. You understand it’ll take some negotiating on her side.” It was a white lie Evy didn’t mind making. Ian didn’t have to know about her situation. “And thanks for the office,” she added as an afterthought, wondering if it would disappoint him that she didn’t sound angry.
He made a dismissive sound. “I didn’t look for that or know anything about it. Cecilia dealt with that. I gotta go. Do your job, and do it well.” With that he hung up and she surveyed her little office again, wondering if Cecilia had known the dimensions of it.
However, she had one, and that was what mattered. She’d make it work. She’d be okay with it. She’d make the best of it. Leila was on the floor—dark wooden planks, as if the room didn’t feel claustrophobic enough—and occupied herself with some paper and pencils. She drew far off the paper, but honestly, Evy couldn’t care less. Lei was silent and that was what mattered.
“Printer,” she said to herself as she hit print, wanting to have the numbers of the event on actual paper. Of course she didn’t own a printer yet.
How she was supposed to set up a second office with more than one person working in a space like that, she didn’t know. There were large offices outside; the building she was working in was just newly opened and redone, and next to her storage room office there was a huge one with a full view over the city. It was an empty room, but Evy had snuck inside anyway to look at it. In front of the door there was a huge open space, offering room for maybe ten to fifteen cubicles.
Evy could see it, almost hear it, the low buzzing of working people, but instead of having a glorious office, she had this.
There was a tiny window at her back, barely big enough to lean out if she wanted to, and she opened it, feeling as if she was suffocating.
The sound of heels on hardwood floor made her look up. She’d left the door open because no one else was working on that floor, and she spotted her best friend coming toward her. She was beaming—which wasn’t unusual—and carried a potted plant that looked like a small palm tree.
If Tessa was thrown off by the tiny office Evy worked in, she didn’t let on, still beaming. “I brought you a plant. You know, it’s what people do if someone moves into a new… something.”
“Storage room?” Evy helped out and Tessa shrugged.
“Let’s be real, your asshole boss won’t pay for a cleaning lady any time soon, and having a small office like this just ensures you can clean it alone. It’s better than any of the huge things, and if you want to move your feet, you can still do that in the space in front of your office’s door.”
Evy smiled. “You know I love you, right? You always see the positive, and yes, I most likely will have to clean by myself.”
Tessa placed the potted plant in one corner, bent to kiss Leila hello, and then stepped back out into the wide space. Evy followed her, observing the room. It had light gray walls, windows looking into smaller offices and also some facing the outside. The ceiling was high for an office building, the lamps efficient and long.
“Did you call your London office to ask if maybe there was a mix up?” Tess eventually asked and Evy snorted.
“I talked to my boss, but… If I didn’t know any better I might believe the mix-up theory, but since he said he didn't look for it or know anything about it, I’m just assuming Cecilia hadn’t gotten the right measurements. Anyway, I’ll do my job, won’t complain, and that’s that.”
And she was set on that. Tessa watched her thoughtfully before walking over to
the window facing the outside.
Evy eyed her up and down. She’d seen her best friend at Christmas and it had been obvious the year had taken a toll on her. She couldn’t remember when Tess had last been so skinny. Now she had curves in the all the right places, wore dark denim and black heels as well as a business suit jacket over a blouse. She could fit into any meeting, but also didn’t exactly stand out in a casual crowd.
Happiness looked exceptionally well on her best friend.
“Speaking of job, any idea of how you’ll secure an event with this?” She pointed back at the black hole in the wall and Evy sighed.
Now would be the perfect time to tell Tessa everything.
I have less than three months to do my job.
I’m supposed to secure your event.
I need your help.
The thing was, she couldn’t get the words past her lips. She was used to doing everything alone, and if Tessa would help her score this gig, she felt as if Lanestrong had won because she’d used her connections.
“I don’t even know where to look actually, but it’ll be okay. I plan on doing a lot of footwork. Ringing doorbells and so on.”
Tessa arched a brow. “I don’t think small people events will help you with this,” she remarked.
“I meant hotels and businesses,” Evy replied and Tessa nodded, sighing.
Something was up. “What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know if you remember the Army event coming up?”
“The one your station sponsors or whatever you do?”
Tessa laughed. “No sponsoring whatsoever. We’re getting paid a shit ton of money because we’re basically presenting the gala, planning the entertainment for the night, and we need to put together TV spots and whatnot for it. It’s a huge thing and I’m either at the studio or out talking to soldiers, wives, and parents of soldiers. You know, military families. We’re looking for stories about bravery and everything. It’s inspiring and incredible. I also spend a quarter of my time at the base now. I think Tank hates seeing me.” She winked while Evy’s stomach dropped.
She hadn’t talked to Tank since he’d sat on her bed, hadn’t even messaged him just to tell him they were okay.
She hadn’t even managed to message him when Leila asked for him constantly. She had no idea how he’d done it, but Tank was pretty much the only guy Leila let close. With others her daughter had a tendency to freak the moment they spoke, as if some male had scared her at some point.
Not that Evy could remember.
“He loves you and you know it,” she said absentmindedly, knowing it was the truth. “Jazz is like his brother, and Tank is glad he has you.”
“Still… What I was aiming at, the event planners for the gala and everything else? They suck. I was supposed to be informed about everything since I deliver the content they have to present, and the Army wants the event my style.” She pulled a face, causing Evy to giggle. “Whatever my style is, but they clearly don’t like me very much. I don’t get informed or involved at all, and it’s just…” She shook her head.
Evy’s heart started to race in her chest. If Tessa were unhappy, maybe things would work out after all.
“I wish I could organize it,” she said casually and Tessa glanced at her, sympathy in her eyes.
“While I think you’d do amazing, I don’t think you could jump in on such a short notice. You don’t have the connections it would take, you don’t know the businesses here, and let’s face it, this wouldn’t be a one-woman-show. You’re out-of-this-world-dedicated, but even you couldn’t make that happen.” Tessa shook her head. “Remember when you started working for Lanestrong Events and you forgot to eat because you worked yourself into the ground, trying to prove yourself?”
Evy remembered that. She’d collapsed on her way home and the diagnosis had been a circulatory collapse from the lack of food and too much coffee. She’d spent two days in the hospital and Tessa had sat by her bed the entire time, telling her she’d never again allow something like that to happen, even if it meant she’d have to hand-deliver food.
“That was different,” Evy insisted. It really wasn’t, but Tessa didn’t need to know that.
“Again, it’s not a one-woman-job, Ev, even if that woman is you,” Tessa argued gently.
“I’m allowed to hire people to help me,” she replied instantly and Tessa grinned weakly.
“It’s going to be cozy in that office of yours. However, I didn’t tell Jazz’s boss yet that I’m not very happy with the planning. I feel horrible, like I’d sink to their level, so…”
“Tessa, this is about so much more. That event is supposed to push the Army’s popularity, and your radio station’s, too. You need to think about that. Do you want their good name ruined?”
Her best friend turned to her, a serious expression on her face now. “The event is March sixteenth, Evangeline, and has been in the planning for almost six weeks now. There’s hardly the same amount of time left. Who would possibly be able to manage the whole event planning? You don’t think Elaborate Events would give any of their clients and partners over, right? They’d cancel all they ordered so far and the whole thing would have to start from the beginning again. You’d need a new concept and everything. No event business could do that. Especially because the Army already spent money on it. Be realistic.”
Would it be hard work, coupled with tears and breakdowns? Yes, but it was possible.
“Tess, it’s possible. You have an amazing event and should be happy with it instead of settling.”
Her best friend shook her head. “You think I’m just going to be a push-over? Is that what you’re saying?”
Instantly Evy back-paddled. “No, I’m just saying—”
“Trust me, they will inform me, and I will have a say in how those things are going, but I will not allow you to work yourself into the ground for an event you cannot possibly arrange by yourself, and finding valuable help will impossible on such short notice because as it is, look around. You don’t have anything to offer in terms of work or reputation. They don’t know you.”
Evy gritted her teeth. “You don’t believe in me.”
Tessa laughed, the sound cold and disbelieving. “I believe in you, Evangeline, but I’m also not stupid, and I’ve seen the organization this kind of event takes. I’m being realistic. Besides, the Army has event planners, and that’s that.”
“If I talk to the Army and they give the thing to me, will you believe I can do it?”
If Tessa hadn’t made so much sense, Evy wouldn’t feel as angry, but being helpless had always caused her to be furious, too.
“Work yourself into the ground if it makes you happy, but don’t expect me to stand by idly and not say something. Good luck with it, Evangeline. Call me when you realize I was right and only have your best interest at heart.”
The moment Tessa was gone; tears started streaming down Evy’s face. If she’d just told Tessa that her life in the US depended on this job, maybe she’d be more understanding.
Maybe then they wouldn’t waste more time, either, but Evy wanted to do this alone, and she already had a plan.
“Leila? Come, we’re going to see Tank,” she called and then turned, steeling her shoulders and wiping away the angry tears. Ian Lanestrong would see what she was made of, even if it was the last thing she ever did.
“Tant!”
Tank lifted the head from the ground, trying to see if he’d just imagined the small voice because he’d been thinking of her, but when he saw small white boots blinking with each step, he rolled out from under the car.
“Tant!”
Leila jumped at him before he had any time to think, and he caught her, knowing he was going to leave grease prints all over her. She wrapped her small arms around his neck and he cuddled her close. She smelled of sugar and baby and mostly of her mom, which caused him to close his eyes.
“Lei,” Jazz greeted the girl, coming around a car.
Tank pulled back, almost smu
g when the girl held onto him, just squinting up at his best friend. “Jesse.”
The way she said it, she might as well been talking about the dirt on the ground.
“You’ll love me one day, I swear,” Jazz muttered good-humoredly and Tank wanted to stand, but Leila kept holding onto him.
“Evy, hey,” his best friend said and Tank knew he should’ve expected her since her daughter was there, but seeing Evy felt like a blow to his stomach.
She was beautiful in an conservative black business suit, her now-straight dark hair pulled into a braid, her lips smiling softly as she hugged Jazz, and then her hazel eyes came to rest on him.
He tried to gauge what she was thinking, but if he knew one thing about her, it was that she wore a poker face like no one else.
“Tank,” she said, her voice soft.
Finally he stood, this time with Leila in his arms, and held a hand out to her, but she ignored it and stepped into his arms for a brief moment the way she had with Jazz.
God, he’d missed her.
“What are you doing here? And how did you get in without company?”
Her eyes flitted to Jazz for a second before she lowered her lashes, a blush on her cheeks. “I used Tessa’s name and told them she sent me to talk to the base commander,” she whispered and Tank arched a brow, feeling how Leila fingered his dog tags.
He expected her to get heavy, but the truth was he wanted to hold onto her. It felt good, her weight in his arms.
“And why exactly do you need to talk to the base commander?” Tank asked.
“Why exactly did you lie to the guy at the gates and use Tessa’s name for it?” Jazz asked at the same time.
Tank smirked as Evy’s chin lifted in defiance. “Tessa is unhappy with the event planner for the charity gala. I want to offer my services,” she explained. “Maybe that way it’ll get better. And I could be around her more.”
Tank glanced at his best friend before stepping forward. “I think it would be a good idea to give it to you because you know Tess, but honestly? You cannot do that alone.”