by Sam Destiny
That Evy understood, and she felt instantly guilty again. “I’d promise it won’t always be like that, but I know it’s a lie. There’s too much to do.”
“Two more days, Ev, and then take off Sunday. I’m going to think of something we can do outside. We can meet up with Tessa and her family, and just do fun things. Unwind a little from all the stress and think about different things. Maybe you could even bring Tank.”
Evy picked up the fork and knife to start eating in order to avoid looking at Hilary. “Why would I bring Tank?” she asked, trying to sound indifferent.
Hilary sighed. “Because I think he needs it. Seeing how life really works. There’s something off about him. Like… I don’t know, maybe it’s just because I keep seeing him now more than ever, but it’s like he’s broken.”
“He’s an ass and you know it.” Then again, Evy didn’t really believe that.
“He’s an ass with everyone else. He hasn’t been one with you. Not even in the beginning. And he changed with me, too. However, you know… I’m kinda still curious about that dinner you had with him. The burger thing when we were at that Halloween party.”
It had been an easy-going and intense evening. “Food, talk, him being pissed at Ian on my behalf, and that was pretty much it.”
Hilary studied her, squeezing her eyes closed before she shook her head. “Fine, don’t tell me. But maybe you’re the one to change him.”
Evy laughed. She’d yet to take a bite of the pancakes and somehow couldn’t bring herself to do so. Her stomach was in knots and she couldn’t exactly say why. “Tank? Me? That’s ridiculous. I’m so not his type.”
“He has a type?” Hilary asked, sounding honestly surprised.
“Cheap and dumb?” Evy suggested.
Hils shook her head. “Honestly? No. I think the way he treats you is much differently than anyone else I know. He was sweet with Tessa for a while there, but nothing compares to the way he is with you. Plus, he’s handsome.”
Evy didn’t comment, finally putting a bite into her mouth, chewing. The pancakes were cold, but damn, they were still heavenly. “This food is freaking awesome.”
Hilary did a small bow. “Thank you, but you cannot distract me.” She winked. “Tank? Be honest here, with you, and with me.”
Evy squinted at her. “Are you trying to play matchmaker, Hils?”
“I’m not trying anything. But he brought you here last night, Evy, and the way he handled you… I think he deserves a chance. That is, if you think he could be—”
“I have a child, and I’ve met a lot of guys like Tank in my life. I just cannot risk it. I have too much to lose here, and imagine I would try something with Tank, anything at all, and it doesn’t work out. I’d have to constantly see him and be around him because he’s Jazz’s best friend.”
“What if it works out and he makes you happy?”
Evy wouldn’t admit that perspective scared her even more than anything else because she couldn’t see herself trusting someone so fully—and what kind of relationship would that be?
The house seemed quiet as Tank rang the doorbell, but it didn’t take longer than ten seconds for the silence to be interrupted.
“Tant!” Leila’s excited scream penetrated the front door and he already smiled to himself before even seeing the girl.
Hilary opened the door. “Told you,” she called inside and then moved so Leila could come out. Tank knelt and caught her, collecting sloppy kisses that made his heart thud with tenderness. God, he wished she’d always be as innocent as she was now.
“Tant! Tome! Draw,” she insisted, taking his index finger and pulling him inside. Hilary arched a brow at him, giving him an unreadable look.
Evy stood in the living room wearing jeans and a blouse, her hair back, and he wanted to walk over and draw her against him to kiss her hello. He’d never before felt an impulse like that and so he turned away, focusing on the little girl who tugged at him to sit down next to the coffee table.
“Tome,” she insisted and he glanced at Evy.
“Do we have a few minutes?” He could tell she wanted to say no, but then nodded.
“We sure do.”
She sat on the sofa, Hilary next to her, and he felt oddly observed as he picked up the pen Leila pushed toward him.
“Here,” the girl ordered, pointing at a star, and he nodded.
“Will do, Ma’am,” he replied. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d colored anything, but when Leila nodded in approval, he grinned.
“Dood. This now.” She pointed at another star and he colored that, too.
“So, what’s the plan for today?” he asked casually.
“Checking the replies, making a list, and then I was thinking I need to see the location.”
He nodded. “We can pick up Lei and take her to the aquarium later,” he pointed out and then heard a thump and Evy complain about something having hurt.
He glanced at them, but besides Evy rubbing her ribs, he couldn’t say what was going on.
“Yes?” he prompted, but the girls just looked at him innocently.
“I like the idea of picking her up, but won’t we waste time if we take her? I mean, after all it’ll take much longer if we look at everything.” There was longing in Evy’s voice, as if she wanted to see the fish and whatnot.
“Evangeline loves the ocean and everything water, so…” Hilary injected casually, arching a brow at him, almost as if trying to tell him something. Something like… This could be a covert date.
“You won’t mind taking Lei and maybe watching her while I speak to the people there?” Evy asked, not reacting to Hilary’s comment.
“Lei, wanna watch fish with me later?” Tank asked toward the little girl and she nodded eagerly.
“Fish! Fish!” She started dancing around the table, around him, and he grabbed her, pulling her onto his lap to tickle her until she giggled, kicking like crazy trying to get away.
“Yes, fish. But before that you’ll be good with Hils, okay? Go take a nap on time and be nice.”
He wasn’t sure the girl was old enough to understand instructions like that, but she nodded nonetheless, making him grin.
“Ready?” Evy asked after he’d put Leila on her feet again, and he took the hand Evangeline held out to him, offering to help him up. He’d manage perfectly fine by himself, but it didn’t matter because he wanted to touch her.
Her fingers were cold under his and he almost pulled them between his palms to warm them.
Almost, because they had an audience and he hadn’t decided what he wanted to do about himself and Evy at all.
“I’ll call you before we come over so you can have her dressed and everything, okay?” Evy asked Hilary and her friend nodded. Tank watched as Evy crouched down to hug and kiss her daughter, lingering in the hug.
“Love you,” Leila announced. “Love Tant, too,” she continued.
“I love you, too, little one,” he replied, ruffling through her hair. The words felt foreign in his lips, and he couldn’t remember if he’d ever said them before, and yet, they felt right, too.
“See you later, Hils,” Evy stated, her voice having taken on a weird tone, and Tank wondered if he’d overstepped a boundary.
Once they were out of the door, he wanted to ask her about it when she stopped, startled.
“How did my car get back here?” she asked, surprised.
Tank grinned. “Tessa took it. Seems she has a spare key she forgot to hand to you and when going with Jazz to pick something up at the base, she saw it, so she took it back with her and caught a bus from here. Johnny’s going with her today, so when we meet her later at your office, we’ll have them both there.”
“It’s good. I miss seeing the little man.”
Tank nodded. “Me, too, to be honest.”
They crossed over to his car and she got in, not even giving him the time to open the door for her. Once they were both inside, he confirmed that they were starting with the office
, then got on the road. Being in the car with her regularly was nice yet confusing. Her berry scent drove him wild, and her silence added to his stress even more.
“You have something on your mind. We need to get you to the point where you tell me things without me prompting,” he complained and she chuckled briefly before sobering again.
“Just you and… kids. Like… I cannot believe how well you are with them. I didn’t think it would be like that.”
He grinned. “I can ease your mind. I’m not normally like this. With Leila it’s easy. She’s the most amazing kid I ever met. Open and friendly and sweet. And Johnny… He’s my best friend’s son. Jazz is like my brother. As much as Tessa doesn’t like it, I’m like the cool uncle you cannot get rid of, that you don’t want around your kids but that kids love.”
She stayed silent for a moment, then placed her hand on his thigh, making him swallow. “I want you around Leila. She loves you. So much. And I trust you with her. She needs a father figure, needs to know someone besides me loves her, so whenever you want to see her, Tank, you’d do me a gigantic favor in dropping by and just spending time with her.”
He gulped. Was she offering him an in with her family? Did she want him in her life? Maybe he should be trying for the relationship thing, too.
Clearing his throat, and wondering what in the world he was going to do if she said yes, he said what was on his mind. “Can I come and visit you, too, when I want to see you? Not just for sex, but because I want to be around you?”
His voice was quiet, subdued, and for a moment he wondered if maybe she hadn’t heard him over the engine running and the music playing in the background, but then she took his hand where it rested on the stick, entwining their fingers.
“Let’s try not to kill each other in the process, okay?” she suggested and he laughed, kissing the back of her hand just because he felt as if he could.
“I’ve never done a relationship,” he confessed, hoping she understood what he was trying to say.
“Yeah, it’s been a while for me too, but I can give you the basics. No other women. No complaining about me being me. No lies.”
He could ease her mind about one thing at least. “There hasn’t been any woman I’ve been thinking about besides you. And the one you heard when you called… you know which talk I mean?”
He saw how she worked her jaw and took that as a yes.
“She looked like you, and in the dark alley I could almost pretend it was you. However, I can’t get it up anymore.”
“You did fine with me,” she replied smugly.
“Because it was you.”
She laughed, squeezing his hand. “We’re going to mess this up,” she predicted.
He couldn’t help but feel confident anyway. “At least we’ll mess up together, and then we’ll clean the mess up together. And if nothing else works, we’ll ask Tessa and Jazz for pointers.”
She sobered. “I’m no Tessa.”
“And I’m no Jazz, but let’s face it, you still like being held.”
“And kissed. By you.”
He shrugged. “See, we have things to work with, so now let’s make this event amazing and then see where the future takes us. Trust me, okay?”
“Already do,” she replied and he couldn’t remember if he’d ever heard words that made him feel as good as those two did.
Tessa was there when they arrived at the office, and again the guy downstairs seemed to have let her in. Not that Evy minded, but she figured it was time she told him to not let anyone up unless she was there.
They had an hour before the people she’d more or less hired yesterday would show, and she was ready to use that hour.
“You don’t need me here, right?” Tank asked and Evy looked back at him, feeling excited, worried, and downright terrified at once. “I have something I’d like to take care of. I’d be back in less than an hour to help you handle the people okay?”
He glanced at Tessa before looking back at her. Her best friend was on her laptop, sitting on what looked like a folding chair while her son was playing quietly in a small pack and play. “We’ll handle it until then,” she told him.
“Where are you going?” Having him around gave Evy a feeling of security she hadn’t realized she was missing in the first place.
Tank laughed softly, stepping closer to draw her against him. “I’ll be back. And you’ll be happy about it.” He winked and then pressed a soft kiss to her lips. She couldn’t believe she’d agreed to try a relationship with him, but if it meant getting kissed constantly, she probably wouldn’t mind all that much.
“Okay. I’ll be here. I mean, we’ll be here.” He nodded, pressed another kiss to her lips, then left again.
Evy didn’t even want to turn to her best friend, but after two minutes of ignoring the way Tessa cleared her throat, she didn’t think she could any longer.
“Say it,” she challenged and Tessa closed her laptop.
“There are about a thousand replies to the invitations. I wonder if we need a plan to attack them. I can stay around until about half past eleven because then I need to leave to do my show,” her best friend replied and Evy gaped.
“Come on, I know that’s not what you want to say.”
Tessa blinked innocently. “What else exactly should I be saying?”
Evy pointed at the elevator. “This… Him and me.”
“And what am I supposed to say?”
Evy tried to read her tone, guess what her best friend was thinking, but it was impossible. “I don’t know. It’s Tank. And you and Tank…”
“I’m not dating Tank. I’m not planning on ever kissing him, or going out with him, or sleeping with him, so how Tank acts around me—although I know by now most of it is bravado—has nothing to do with what you do with Tank. And maybe it’s a good distraction for you.”
“Distraction?” Ev echoed. “We’re going to… I’m going to… This is a serious relationship. Or at least we’ll try for it.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?” She felt like a parrot, but the things Tessa was saying were nowhere near what she’d expected.
Instead she’d prepared herself for judgments and fights.
“Yes, Evangeline, okay. Who am I to question your happiness or decisions? It’s not like you met Tank just yesterday, and even then I couldn’t say a thing because of Jazz. I mean, I knew nothing about him and wanted it all. I know I don’t need to worry because you’re not one to make impulsive decisions. If you decided to do this thing, you’ve probably had it in the back of your mind for a while.”
Evy wished she had a chair to sit on. She didn’t want to stand anymore because her mind was a mess. With Tank out of her vicinity she suddenly panicked, and not just for herself, but for him.
“I have trust issues, Tessa. I’m used to doing my own thing and I’m going to hurt him by still doing that, and I don’t want to. God, I’m the first real relationship he’s had, and if I mess up, he might never again be able to—”
“Jesus, Ev, slow down. This thing is fresh, and let’s try the positive way, okay? What if you are his only relationship because it’s perfect and right? What if you work out? Yes, you want to do it all by yourself, but in case you didn’t notice, Tank’s not really the guy to just roll over.”
Evy stared at her best friend. “You’re currently trying to convince me that I did the right thing in starting something with Tank?”
Which she believed was a good thing, but she couldn’t see Tessa agreeing.
“Fine. What the fuck have you been thinking, wanting to date such an asshole? Who has so far done nothing but make sure you have everything you need, and also who dares to take care of you when you don’t? How in the fucking world can you possibly like someone who’s been nothing but gentle with you? Jesus, how can you follow your own heart when it doesn’t matter what others are thinking? Like for real, how can you?” Tessa’s expression softened. “Do I approve of his attitude, or the way he goes about things? No. Do
I approve of the way he looks at you? Yes. So much. Because he wants to take care of you and I have a feeling he’d do that no matter if you’re friends or lovers. And I approve because you never let me do that and I don’t have the strength to force my attention on both you and Jazz. And now, let’s please get something sorted so I know it’ll be okay when I leave you later on.”
Finally Tessa stood and turned away from her. It was funny, because Evy had considered things were easier now that Jazz did what he was supposed to and was fully invested, but it seemed she was wrong.
“Tess—”
“No, sweetie. We’re perfect, okay? Don’t worry. All I’m saying is if he can calm your mind, hold onto him. That’s what matters. In between all the craziness you need someone who makes you feel as if you finally can breathe and slow down.”
Tank made her feel a lot of things, but she wasn’t sure slowing down was one of those things. However, calmer definitely was true.
Her phone rang and Evy grabbed it from her pocket. It was Sweetie’s Bake, the bakery doing the cakes, and Evy’s stomach dropped. If they cancelled on her now, she’d get a heart attack. “Jackson?”
She walked out of the main room into her stuffed office, and after having stood in the free space, she felt suffocated inside her own tiny room.
“We need to know when you’ll be coming by for a tasting. We have sixteen flavors you can pick from and that means you need some time. Bring at least two more people because it’s usually easier if you have others trying it as well,” the woman on the phone announced and Evy laughed briefly, relieved it was something good.
“Hold on.” She leaned into the doorframe. “Tess, cake tasting. When can you and Jazz join Tank and me?” She figured it was the best having those two there.
“Tomorrow morning? That way we have it out of the way. Jazz gets time off when he needs it, so I just have to let him know.”
“Tomorrow morning is perfectly fine. Half past nine?” the woman on the phone offered and Evy agreed, then hung up.
“Okay, so,” Tessa started, kneeling next to the bag with the letters. “We might have to turn people down.”