I scooted around so that I was lying flat on my back with my head on a pillow. Kelsey sidled up next to me and nuzzled into the crook of my neck. I wrapped an arm around her and stroked her hair. If there was a time in my life more perfect, I didn’t know when it would’ve been.
“We fit together pretty well, Martin.”
Her fingers traced the ridges of my abs as they constricted with each deep breath I took. “Oh, I kinda like it when you call me by my last name. We may have to try that out sometime.”
“I don’t know about that.”
“What? Why not?”
I glanced over at her, not entirely sure if she was fucking with me or not. Her innocent stare told me she hadn’t thought that one through.
“Imagine you’re me, having sex with you.”
Her eyes widened. “Oh, this sounds fun.”
I rolled my eyes. “Okay. And so you’re a guy, right?”
“Yep, I am you.”
“And you’re talking dirty to you, using your last name.”
“Okay, so I’m you—a guy. And I’m fucking me and talking dirty. So I say, ‘Oh yeah, you like the way I’m fucking you, Mart—’ ” She froze and covered her mouth.
I nodded and said, “Yeah. Exactly. It might kill the mood a little for me. Nothing against that, it’s just not my thing.”
She reached up and pinched one of my cheeks. “Aww, I think you’d make a hot gay guy.”
I chuckled. “No offense, but I don’t think I have the style to pull it off. Now, Ethan on the other hand. I think he’d be pretty good at it. Dude looks like he walked right out of a fashion magazine every day.”
“Yes. Ethan would be perfect.” She laughed. “We are so wrong!”
I pulled her in closer to me and gave her a soft peck on the forehead. “Maybe two wrongs can make a right.”
—
I pulled into the parking lot in front of Sweeney’s, a bar that Ethan and I frequented on occasion. As usual, the parking lot sat empty, the way we liked it. Sweeney’s provided an opportunity to talk without yelling over live music or dealing with fans asking for autographs left and right.
I’d dropped Kelsey off at her place on the way. Waking up with her in my arms was fucking awesome. I must’ve watched her sleep, snuggled into my shoulder, for at least an hour.
A chilly wind hit my face when I stepped out of the car, but my entire world seemed like a new foreign place. I heard things I didn’t usually hear, like birds chirping and shit. Everything seemed brighter and more alive. Endorphins coursed through my body every time I thought about Kelsey, like my spirit was invigorated by this new possibility of a life with her in it permanently.
I walked into the bar and nodded to Sweeney. He was perched on the same stool as usual. Ethan hunched over the bar poking angrily at his phone with a pint sitting next to his elbow.
“Goddamn it.” A vein bulged from the side of his neck.
“Always so intense.” I grinned.
His head whipped in my direction. “About time, motherfucker.”
“Jesus, five minutes late. You’d think you’ve been waiting for hours.” I walked up and took a seat next to him.
“Beer, Matty?” Sweeney made a show of standing up from his stool.
“Whatever this asshole is having.” I nodded toward Ethan’s glass.
“Give him two thirds of a beer, Sweens. He doesn’t deserve a full one.” Ethan chuckled at his own joke.
I shook my head. “Why do you look like you want to throw that thing through the wall?”
Ethan sighed. “Just some work shit.”
I stared. “You haven’t stressed about work since Jenny came along. Stop bullshitting.”
“Don’t worry about it. It’s nothing.”
I grinned. It was obviously something he didn’t want me to know about.
“Let it go or I will bring you down with me, bitch.”
Sweeney set a beer down in front of me, filled to the top.
Ethan glanced up at him. “Traitor.”
Sweeney chuckled and walked off.
“He knows better than to give me a partial beer. That’s sacrilege.”
“Indeed.” Sweeney walked back down to his stool.
I took a drink, and even the beer tasted better today. Kelsey made beer better; who would’ve thought?
I stared at Ethan. “It’s wedding shit, isn’t it?”
“I have to go look at flowers.”
I burst into laughter and Ethan glared laser beams at me.
“So what are you guys thinking? For the arrangements?”
“I’m going to kick your big fucking ass. That’s what I’m thinking.”
I barely contained myself and patted him on the back. “Can’t you outsource that shit?”
Ethan looked away. “I tried.”
“Well, I think since day one we’ve known who wears the pants.”
“Says the guy who looks like Cupid fired a quiver of arrows up his asshole.” Ethan grinned.
Fuck, was it that obvious? “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Yeah, right. Might as well have danced up in this bitch singing something from West Side Story.”
“Don’t do it, bro.”
Ethan’s arms flailed. “I feel pretty.”
“Hey, how is your arm? Can you still throw pretty good?”
Ethan cocked an eyebrow up. “Um, yeah. I’d strike your big ass out.”
I burst into laughter and smacked him on the back. “Dude, you couldn’t do that shit before the surgery. That’s funny, though. Good one.”
“Please. They used to issue tornado warnings before I’d take the mound. Big fucks like you causing hurricane winds from all the swinging and missing.”
I shook my head. “You are so full of shit. But I’m glad your arm is still in decent shape.”
“Why are you glad?”
“You’ll be able to toss the bouquet extra high for my tall ass.”
Ethan chuckled. “Don’t you mean the garter?”
“No, Jenny will have already pulled that off your leg from underneath your dress. Probably with her teeth.”
Ethan struggled not to laugh and shook his head. “Such a prick. How long you been saving that one up?”
“A while.” I took another swig of beer and stared at him, deadpan. “Don’t be a cheap ass, either. Spring for the roses. Nobody will be fooled by daisies and sunflowers and shit.”
“I don’t know why I put up with you.”
“Because you love me.”
“It’s true. I do, sweetie.”
“Thanks, hon. Now, what do you need to talk to me about?” I took in a deep breath.
I knew it couldn’t be good. Ethan kept the jokes running far too long. His ass was stalling, something he rarely did.
“I told you the Yanks want an answer sooner. But there’s more.”
I sat my beer down and stared off at the wall, away from him. “More?”
“I spoke with the GM of the Rangers. They’re worried they’ve offered too much. Have a few guys they’d like to call up to spring training, but they’re not sure. It’s all a waiting game to see what happens with you.”
I ran a hand through my hair and stared down at the floor. Why did everything have to be so difficult? It was a fucking game, for crying out loud. That was life, though, always complicated, always a risk of upsetting or hurting someone no matter what choices you made.
“So a quicker decision would help them, too?”
“Exactly.” He took another gulp of his beer. “Look, don’t pressure yourself trying to please everyone. I know how you are. This is a fucking monumental decision for your career.”
“I know, but—”
He grabbed me by the forearm. “No. No buts, Matty. This is your life. This decision affects you forever. I’m not just saying that to hear myself talk. It’s the truth.”
“Fuck.” I crushed one of the cardboard coasters in my palm. “You know I don’t want to g
o to New York. We’ve hated them since we were kids. But you played the game, too. You know what it means to be a Yankee. Contender every year. The history.”
“I know. They’re dicks. But they are indeed glorious dicks.”
I chuckled. “And the money. It sounds so fucking selfish, man. It’s tearing me up. I mean, let’s be honest, you know I’m going to care about what people think of me, the fans in this town. They won’t understand.”
“I’m not being a smartass when I ask this next question.”
I laughed a little. “Sure.”
“I mean it. I’m being a hundred percent real with you, because I know it matters.”
“You gonna ask the fucking question?”
“Fine.” He took in a huge breath and turned to me. “What does Kelsey think about all of this? I mean, you told her, right?”
Anxiety ripped through my veins and landed in my stomach. My eyes darted away.
“No, no, no. Matty?”
I couldn’t face him.
“Look at me.”
I finally turned to face him.
“Why?”
“It’s not like I haven’t wanted to talk to her about it. But you know how she is. You know her. The timing is always wrong.”
Ethan nodded. “Sure, I get it. But—”
“There would be no Kelsey if I brought it up. She’d roadrunner out of my life so damn fast for not telling her sooner.”
“I mean, you don’t know that.”
I stared at him. “Yeah. I do.”
“You need to talk to her. This will not end well.”
“It won’t end well no matter what. But if I wait, I have more time to win her over. Maybe to a point where she won’t spook when I tell her what’s going on. Because I’m going to stay.”
“Jesus, man. Listen to yourself.” He looked up at the ceiling and back at me. “Does that sound like a good fucking plan? Have you said that out loud to yourself? Two seconds ago you were telling me about the Yankees, and the prestige. It didn’t sound like you were sure. Now all of a sudden you are? You’re a fucking mess, bro.”
“I didn’t say it was the best plan. I’ve been dealt a shit hand and I’m playing it the best way I know. And it sounds even more awful that we’re talking about a nine-figure deal and I’m calling it a shit hand.”
“So what is your plan?” He emphasized the word plan. “No bullshit, like is your mind made up?”
“I was hoping to wait until after the wedding. I don’t want to cause any problems.”
I watched Ethan and could practically see the wheels spinning in his head. “Maybe it’d work either way. Like she’d go with you. If that’s what you decided. You can’t wait that long, though. The wedding is still a long way off. She’ll find out before then, and not from you.”
I gave him a side eye that told him everything he needed to know. His phone buzzed against the bar at the same time.
Ethan glanced down to it. “Shit, I have to go.” He downed his beer and clapped a hand on my back. “I’m pretty good at reading people. You know this. My gut tells me you aren’t going anywhere. But if there is a chance you’re seriously considering New York’s offer, you need to tell her as soon as possible. Scratch that, you need to tell her regardless. I don’t give a shit about problems it might cause with the wedding. Jenny and I want you and her to be happy and we can figure that stuff out.”
I shook my head. “Go pick out your flowers. I don’t want to be the reason you show up late. I’d prefer to stay on Team Bridezilla.”
“Good idea. The best one you’ve had today.” His hand gripped the side of my neck. “Tell her what’s up. She may surprise you. I’ve got your back no matter what. It’ll kill her if she finds out from someone other than you.”
My stare turned down to the floor and I mumbled, “It’ll kill her no matter what.” I looked up at him. “But thanks, man. I’ll think about it.”
“You know where to find me if you need me.”
“Bye, hon.” I joked, but gave him the look that said, thanks.
“Bye, sweetie.” Ethan strode toward the door.
“Get the roses, ya cheap prick!”
A middle finger shot up over his shoulder as he pushed through the door.
Chapter 14
“When people run in circles it’s a very, very mad world.”
—Gary Jules
Kelsey Martin
A few weeks had passed since the first night I stayed with Matt. My entire life had pretty much done a backflip and yet everything seemed right with the universe. I’d stayed at his place almost every night, to the point where I had my own toothbrush there.
I wasn’t sure how he did it, but he’d managed to shrink down the huge cloud of doubt that’d hovered in my brain for as long as I could remember. We were pretty much inseparable sans the two times I went with Jenny to do wedding-planning stuff and when I had to work.
“You ready?” Matt walked around the corner into his living room.
A black Led Zeppelin Swan Song T-shirt clung tight to his chest and biceps.
“Your shirt is a little small.” It was hot as hell, to be honest, but Matt didn’t need the ego boost—though I found myself pretty certain he was already aware.
“What are you talking about? Fits me perfectly.” He grinned.
I rose from the couch and flashed him a playful stare.
“It’s my lucky shirt. Got it in high school. Don’t judge me.”
I reached my hands up toward the ceiling and yawned. Matt’s house threatened to make me the laziest person on the planet. His television was gigantic and I was pretty sure he had every good movie known to mankind ready at the press of a button.
“You’re one to talk.” He walked toward me and looked down at my stomach.
I glanced to where he stared and noticed my Dead Weather tee had risen above my jeans, showing off some of my stomach. “Women’s shirts are supposed to fit this way. Is yours a women’s size?”
His hands gripped me around the waist and he kissed my forehead. “I don’t know.” He shrugged. “I never checked.”
I traced the letters of Led Zeppelin with a finger. His chest and shoulders were about twice as wide as my own, and my hands constantly explored them.
Matt stepped back. “We need to go.”
“What?” I reached out and put my hands on his pecs again, where they belonged.
He narrowed his eyes at my hands. “You know where this always leads.” His face lit up. “And I have a special surprise for you today.”
“Is it your dick? Because I will fall for that joke, Matt.”
Matt’s shoulders bounced up and down along with his laughter. “It’s not my dick, but I’ll remember that you’re a sucker for that joke.”
“Pun points awarded, sir.” I held out a fist.
Matt bumped it. “Thank you for noticing. Now, let’s go.”
—
We pulled up in front of a large building. It was 3 P.M. on a Sunday and the building looked deserted.
“What is this place? It doesn’t look like they’re open.”
“It’s not. For the public anyway.” He waggled his eyebrows. “It’s the Texas Music Museum.”
I shot straight up in my seat. The words were plastered across the building but I hadn’t bothered to look hard enough. My mind had been focused on the hot sex we didn’t have before we left, but this was perfect. He always found a way to surprise me.
“You mentioned one time that you’d always wanted to go, but had never been.”
Hot, sweet, amazing in the bedroom, and he fucking listens. You better not fuck this one up, Kelsey.
I had to constantly remind myself to slow down, because I ate, drank, and breathed Matt Stallworth nonstop, all day, every day. It had started to seem like borderline obsession.
“This is just—” I looked over at him and smiled a huge, cheesy smile. “It’s perfect. Thank you.”
“Come on. I called in a favor with the guy who runs
the place. We have a personal tour guide. I’ve only been here once.”
“This is so cool.”
We both got out of the car. An older man, maybe midsixties with thin, silvery hair, greeted us at the door in a suit. “Mister Stallworth.” He reached out and shook Matt’s hand, then turned to me. “And Miss Martin.” He had a soft Southern accent.
I shook his hand, as well. “Thank you so much for this.”
“My name is Jiles. It’s my pleasure.” He turned his gaze toward my boobs and stared.
I looked up at Matt like, what the fuck?
Matt chuckled and shrugged. I couldn’t help but sit there and grin. If he hadn’t been as old as he was I was pretty sure Matt would’ve kicked his ass on the spot.
The old man finally pried his eyes away from my chest and looked at both of us. “Sorry, I just love their album, Horehound.”
Matt and I slowly turned to each other, completely in shock.
“You like the Dead Weather?” I asked.
“Oh yeah. I just love that ‘I Cut Like a Buffalo’ song. Jack is a very talented guitar player and songwriter, but man, that guy can really bang the drums.”
“I thought you were checking out my girlfriend’s boobs.” Matt laughed.
My heart nearly melted into the ground. It was the first time he’d referred to me as his girlfriend. In all the time we’d spent together the past few weeks, we hadn’t ever really defined the relationship. I wasn’t one to worry about labels and titles, but with Matt, I did. The right time to bring it up had never really presented itself.
I looked up at him and he smiled back like it was any normal moment.
“Oh, those are nice, too. Well done, son.” Jiles nudged Matt in the ribs and gave him an obvious wink. He stared at my breasts again and my face flushed pink. Jiles pointed at the picture of the band. “I have a crush on that Alison Mosshart, myself.”
I breathed a huge sigh of relief. Matt’s hand slid down to mine and our fingers locked. He bent down toward my ear and whispered, “Sorry, that just slipped out by accident. We need to have that talk, though, tonight. We should’ve done it sooner.”
How does he read my mind?
“That girl has a set of pipes on her. Anyway, you didn’t come here to stand out in front of the building. Let’s do this shit.” Jiles took off toward the door on a power walk, leaving us behind.
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