“I don’t want to get married, I don’t want the inheritance, and it ceased to be my home a long time ago.” He wasn’t as sure of those statements as he had been a few days ago.
Broc got to his feet. “I think you’re making a mistake, but it’s your life. I’m hungry. Are you going down to breakfast, or would you rather stay and wrestle with that tie?”
Rafe had almost forgotten the tie in his hand. “I can handle the tie. It’s everything else that I can’t.”
Maria could have eaten in her room, but she was so tense that just the thought of food made her stomach heave. She had told herself she would have to face Rafe sometime, but she was relieved when she found only Luis in the breakfast room.
“Where are Rafe and Broc?” the boy asked.
“Maybe they slept late.”
“Rafe never sleeps late,” Luis stated emphatically, “but Broc does. Broc says in Texas he has to get up early because his cows get up early. Do our cows get up early?”
Maria had no knowledge of the nocturnal habits of livestock. “I don’t know, but the chickens do.”
Rosana entered from the kitchen bearing a pot of coffee. “What can I get you to eat?”
“Nothing. My stomach isn’t feeling right.”
Rafe entered in time to hear Maria’s response. “Are you getting sick?”
The concern in Rafe’s voice made her feel even worse.
Broc, who had followed Rafe into the room, subjected her to close scrutiny. “She doesn’t seem sick. Why don’t you take a look and tell me what you think?” he said to Rafe.
Rafe took Maria’s chin in his hand, turned her head from one side to the other, while he peered into her eyes. She felt so much like a criminal caught in the glare of a spotlight, she had to force herself to sit still. Why hadn’t she stayed in her room?
Rafe released her chin. “I don’t think she’s suffering from anything more serious than a poor night’s sleep brought on by her inability to find a satisfactory solution to a problem that’s bothering her.”
“Mama didn’t sleep, either,” Luis informed everyone. “She woke me up. Did she wake you when she went to your room?” he asked Maria.
Maria had lain awake most of the night listening for any unusual sounds from Luis’s room. “I was already awake.” She was relieved when Rosana deflected Rafe’s attention from her to ask what he would like for breakfast.
“Bring me the same,” Broc said when Rafe said he liked the looks of Luis’s breakfast and would have some of that.
Luis beamed. “Mama says I should have only fruit for breakfast, but I like sausage and potatoes, too.” He also had stewed tomatoes and corn muffins.
By the time the men had poured their coffee and taken places at the table, Maria had herself under control. Rafe didn’t mention anything about last night or ask about Dolores. Instead he and Luis planned what they wanted to do for the day. Maria decided she would stay in the house to give Luis as much time as possible with his brother.
Watching Rosana bustle in and out of the room, fussing over the men, making sure they had everything they wanted and that it was what they wanted, Maria realized she would miss Rosana, Juan, and all the others who worked in the house. They had become her family. They had formed a partnership, each respecting the others’ strengths and areas of responsibility, all working for the benefit of the whole. And now Dolores’s foolish lie was threatening to bring that happy alliance to an end.
Luis pushed back his chair. “I’ve finished my breakfast,” he said to Maria. “May I go?”
“Go where?” Knowing Dolores had threatened to kidnap the boy, she couldn’t be entirely at ease with his being alone.
“I have to change my clothes. Rafe is going to teach me how to saddle my pony.”
Rafe, barely half through his breakfast, smiled at her unspoken question.
“He can spend the time getting acquainted with his pony. It’s important for a man to build a relationship with his horse.”
Luis swelled with happiness when Rafe referred to him as a man. Leaving the ranch was going to be very hard on him. “Okay.” She wanted to say no, but she couldn’t hover over Luis all the time. Besides, Dolores couldn’t kidnap him by herself, and no sane person would help her. “Just make sure one of the stable hands is with you.”
Luis nodded and hurried from the room. She turned back to Rafe. “It’s good of you to spend so much time with him. I never realized how important it was to him to have a man around.”
“I don’t understand why my father ignored Luis. That was so different from how he was with me.”
“I think he was ill for a lot longer than we knew. I doubt he had the energy to do for Luis what he did for you.”
“Then he could have asked Miguel to teach him.” Rafe looked almost angry. “I’m sure he never forgave Dolores for having deceived and entrapped him, but that was no reason to take his anger out on Luis.”
She was relieved to know Rafe was so concerned about his brother. It would make it easier to say what she had to say. “We need to talk about a living allowance for Luis.”
Rafe’s brow knitted. “Why? If you need to buy anything extra, like clothes or another pony when he outgrows the one I bought, the lawyer will give you the money.”
Maria had spent hours deciding what to say to Rafe only to have the words desert her when she needed them. “You’ve told Dolores she has to leave the house within a month. I don’t agree with your decision, but I can understand why you made it.” It took all of her courage not to break eye contact with Rafe. He looked baffled by her request.
“I don’t see what that has to do with Luis needing a living allowance.”
Maria swallowed. “I know you have little sympathy for Dolores, but she is my sister and she did invite me to live here in luxury compared to what I would have had to endure at home.”
“You’ve more than paid for any luxuries you allowed yourself.”
She had worked hard, but that wasn’t what she was trying to say. “Dolores wasn’t brought up to take care of herself or anybody else, much less a house hold. What I’m trying to say is that Dolores is incapable of living alone. She needs someone to take care of all the things she simply knows nothing about.”
“Her allowance isn’t generous, but it is sufficient to hire someone to help her.”
Maybe being away from her had allowed Rafe to forget what Dolores was like. Maybe his own competence, his ability to adapt to any circumstance, had made him believe others could do the same. “Dolores can’t live on her allowance, but the two of us can if I’m there to manage for her.”
Both men stopped eating and directed stern looks toward her. “Are you saying you’ll leave the ranch when Dolores does?” Rafe asked.
“Yes. She can’t manage on her own.”
“Then let her suffer the consequences.” Broc’s mouth was twisted in disagreement. “That woman is entirely selfish.”
Maria was surprised at Broc’s harsh response. “I know you can’t understand, but—”
Broc pushed back his chair and got up. “It has nothing to do with understanding,” he snapped. “I’m going to see how Luis is getting along with his pony.” He left more of his breakfast on the plate than he had eaten.
The silence after he left was overwhelming. Rafe continued to eat his breakfast, studying her while he chewed. “Say something,” she said when she could keep quiet no longer.
“I don’t think you should go with Dolores. She’ll never understand that anything she’s done, or is doing, is the cause of her unhappiness.”
He didn’t have to tell her that. For years she’d refused to face the true nature of Dolores’s character. Her sister had found it easier to lie to get what she wanted than to alter her expectations of what life had to offer her. But not for one minute would Maria consider letting Dolores take Luis while she stayed at the ranch. “I admit that Dolores has her faults, but I can’t abandon her.”
“What does all of this have to do
with a living allowance for Luis?”
“You can’t expect Dolores to support both Luis and herself.”
“We all agree that Dolores doesn’t know how to support herself on her allowance. Why would I expect her to be able to support Luis as well?”
“You don’t, and neither do I. That’s why Luis needs an allowance of his own.”
“If the house hold allowance isn’t sufficient to cover his normal expenses, I’ll increase it.”
“This has nothing to do with the house hold accounts.”
“Look, I don’t know how you manage the accounts, but if it would be easier for you to have all of Luis’s expenses in a separate account, that’s fine. Though I don’t see how you can decide how much of this morning’s breakfast could be considered his expense.”
Maria felt guilty for not coming right out in the beginning and saying why she needed a separate allowance for Luis. “I need the extra money because Luis will be living with Dolores and me.”
Chapter Fourteen
Rafe’s eyes practically drilled a hole through Maria. “You’re free to do what you think best for yourself, but under no circumstances will Luis leave this house to live with Dolores.”
“I’ll make sure he’s well cared for.”
“I’m sure you’d try, but you can’t possibly believe living with Dolores is in his best interest.”
“Dolores says she’ll take you to court. She says a judge has told her no court will take a child from its mother, that the law considers men unsuited by nature to raise children. She says if I don’t convince you to give Luis an allowance and go with her, she’ll take Luis and I’ll never see him again.” She hadn’t meant to say any of that, but it all came pouring out.
Rafe regarded her for a moment, his expression softening. “If necessary, I’ll take Luis where no judge would ever find either of us, but I doubt I’ll have to go to that extreme. I’m sure I can find enough evidence to convince any judge Dolores is unfit to raise a child.”
Maria wasn’t sure. Men couldn’t say no to Dolores.
“I’d much prefer that you stay here and continue to take care of Luis,” Rafe said.
She had been so afraid of losing Luis, his words made her dizzy with relief. “I’m surprised you would want me to care for him considering how you feel about the way I’ve brought him up.” Maybe her reply wasn’t fair, but she was angry and felt powerless.
“I didn’t express myself very well.”
Was he about to apologize?
“You’ve done a good job. It’s just that he’s lacking the influence of a man, and he’s going to need that to be respected as a man.”
“So you’re saying that being able to ride and shoot well—maybe I ought to add fistfighting and performing tricks on horseback—are more important than being thoughtful and understanding of others?”
Rafe didn’t appear annoyed by her outburst. “I doubt you’ll find many women who appreciate those virtues in a man. They look for a man who’s strong enough to protect them and provide for their children.”
Maria hated the fact that he could undermine her position so easily, but she knew he was right. The gentler virtues were saved for women and the church.
“I know sisters are taught to help each other,” Rafe said, “but I don’t understand your continued loyalty to Dolores.”
It was impossible to explain how she could still feel responsible for a sister who’d lied to her, who’d taken advantage of her and everyone else in her life, who cared for no one but herself, but she still did. Dolores couldn’t adapt to the change in their circumstances any more than their father could. She was too strong to commit suicide, but not strong enough to accept her altered position in life.
Rafe took a swallow of his coffee and pushed back his chair from the table. “I intend to convince you to stay here and take care of Luis. Dolores can take care of herself. Now I’m going to see what Broc is teaching Luis. I wouldn’t put it past him to tell him so many stories about what we did during the war, the boy will sneak out when we’re not watching to try to copy some of them.”
“Wouldn’t that make him the kind of man you think he needs to become?” She realized her response sounded a bit childish, but she resented his telling her what to do.
Rafe paused briefly before answering. “We did desperate things because we had no alternative. I hope Luis never has to make the same kind of choices. I lost a lot of friends. I wouldn’t want to lose my only brother.”
His answer made her feel small. “I’m sure Broc would never do anything to hurt Luis. He seems like a very nice man.”
Rafe smiled and Maria felt something warm inside. “I was only trying to ease the tension between us. I don’t like it when you’re angry with me.”
All of her resentment melted. “I’m not really angry. I’m frustrated. I feel caught between my duty to Dolores and my responsibility for Luis.”
“Let Dolores ruin herself if she wants. You owe her nothing. Now, before I make you too angry to forgive me, I’d better go.”
Maria was left with her mouth open. Rafe wanted her to forgive him; he cared about her opinion of him. Although Rafe was still determined to go back to Texas, he was truly concerned about doing what was best for Luis. Now it was up to her to do the same. There was no question in her mind about what she wanted to do. She wanted to stay at the ranch with Luis, but that decision would conflict with Dolores’s demands.
Before Maria could decide which of her house hold duties needed her attention first, Dolores entered the breakfast room.
“I saw Rafe leaving the house. How much allowance is he going to give Luis?”
There would be no hours of rest, no period of relative quiet. “Rafe won’t allow us to take Luis from the ranch, and he refused to consider an allowance for him.”
“He doesn’t care that I’ll have to live in some squalid hotel room slowly starving because I don’t have enough money to feed myself?”
“You’ll have to bud get carefully, but you’ll have more than enough money to keep from starving.”
Dolores threw up her hands. “You don’t understand because you don’t care what you look like. When a woman is as beautiful as I am, people expect her to look stunning all the time. I can’t do that if I wear the same old dresses every night. You’ve got to talk Rafe into giving Luis a really big allowance. If I have his allowance to combine with mine, I won’t feel so desperate.”
Maria decided it was impossible to make Dolores understand. Her only choice was to do something she’d never done before: stand up to Dolores. “Rafe won’t let Luis go with you. He said he’d go to court to prevent it. Nor is he going to give Luis a big allowance. But if he did allow Luis to leave with you, and if he did give him a big allowance, I wouldn’t allow one cent of it to be spent on your clothes.”
Paralyzed by shock, Dolores gaped at Maria.
“Since Rafe won’t allow Luis to leave the ranch, I can’t leave, either,” Maria went on. “You will have to live on your own.” Maria’s conscience wouldn’t allow her to leave Luis. Neither would her heart. She loved him too much.
“I’ve never had to live by myself. I don’t know how,” Dolores cried in panic.
Maria was shocked Dolores would make such an admission. Though Maria had made all the decisions, Dolores had always insisted she was the one in control. She’d acted as though every success had been of her own making. “It’s not that hard to do. Before the first month has passed, you’ll probably be wondering what I’ve been doing all these years.”
“I don’t care what you’ve been doing. You’ve got to come with me. Rosana and Juan can take care of Luis. They’ve been trying to do that ever since he was born.”
It had been Warren’s decision that Maria would have final responsibility for Luis.
“It’s not just that I need to be here for Luis,” Maria told her sister. “Someone needs to run the house hold as well.”
“Rosana can do that.”
“Rafe h
as asked me to stay. He can’t take care of everything from Texas.”
Dolores’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “When did Rafe start to depend on you to take care of the ranch?”
“Not the ranch. Just Luis and the house.”
“That’s the same thing.”
Leave it to Dolores to ignore the ranch and the work required to support her expensive tastes. “Miguel will continue to oversee everything other than Luis and the house.”
“How can you abandon me for Luis?” Dolores’s eyes filled with tears, and for once her show of emotion was more than mere manipulation. “I thought you loved me,” she whispered.
“Of course I love you.”
“You love Luis more, or you wouldn’t leave me to starve alone.”
When did Dolores become such a child? Maria had coddled her and taken care of her, and just like a child who had been coddled too much, she’d turned into a spoiled, selfish adult. “It’s not that I love Luis more than you. He’s a child. You’re a grown woman. It’s time you started to act like one.”
Dolores’s tears stopped and her eyes turned hard. “Are you hoping Rafe will marry you?” Her laugh was mocking. “Why would he marry you when he could have had me?”
Maybe because he hates you so much he can’t stand to be in the same room with you. “Rafe has made it clear from the beginning that he intends to go back to Texas as soon as he can.”
“He won’t,” Dolores declared. “Laveau says Rafe and Broc hate him and are trying to find a way to drag him back to Texas so they can kill him.”
“I don’t think Rafe would kill anyone, but I can understand why he hates the man whose betrayal caused his friends to die.”
“Laveau didn’t betray anyone. That was just a lie Cade Wheeler and his friends used to steal Laveau’s ranch.”
“What ever Laveau may or may not have done, and whether Rafe stays here or goes back to Texas, I am going to raise Luis until he’s grown, and you are going to have to learn to live on your own.”
The tears started to flow again. “I can’t believe you’re abandoning me, not after I brought you to live here instead of sinking into oblivion with our mother and sister.”
Someone Like You (Night Riders) Page 15