“Please baby, listen to me,” I said calmly to her. “I love you so much. You know you have my heart. I have given it to you freely from the minute we met. Those promises we made to each other back in Pottersville were very real. Our commitment to each other has changed my life. I have not regretted one minute spent with you, no matter what we were doing. I’ll fight with you all day long, if I know I’ll get to hold you in my arms at night.”
The fight had now left her. She placed her head back to me so I could place kisses on the side of her cheek.
“I love you, Riley. Please don’t ever doubt me or my love for you. I don’t know what else I can do to convince you that what I say is true. I’m sorry if I hurt you. It was never my intention. You demand honesty from me. You can’t shut me out every time I give it to you.”
I loosened my hold on her and turned her around to face me. She didn’t look away. If anything, her stare had me almost hypnotized.
“Talk to me, Riley. Please?”
“I’m an idiot! Why are you even with me, Jackson? I am crazy. You should be with someone more like you. Not a girl that is always questioning why you’re with her. I want to be deserving of your love. Your love is a gift. My thoughts are all over the place. I jump head first without ever thinking about the consequences of my actions. You’re right. I do demand so much from you, and when I disagree, I shut you out. I hate feeling so insecure. This is not me, Jackson.”
“No it’s not, Riley. You are incredibly strong. You have a pure heart filled with a thousand emotions, all that I love by the way. You do deserve me, and I you. I love you, crazy girl…even your crazy mood swings. You can’t just pick parts of a person to love. You are my chosen soul mate. I freely gave my heart over to you without any conditions. You accepted that love, and now here we are. I love you. I promise to always remind you of that love each and every day.”
I held her tightly as I continued, “You are kind and loving, but never ever stupid, and certainly not an idiot. I’m actually getting pretty pissed off every time you belittle yourself. This is my final warning, so stop it. We will be married, Riley, just not today. The day you become mine, and really mine will be the happiest day of our lives. We will be surrounded by every single person that loves us and believes in our story. We deserve our moment, just like our parents do. Our love is forever, and it’s not going anywhere. Please believe me, baby. I have never ever lied to you when it comes to my feelings for you, Riley Taylor Briggs. You are part of me. And I am part of you.”
“That sounds like a line you would use in saying your wedding vows,” she said.
“It could be. I’ll make sure to remember it when we get to that part of the program. Are you okay now?”
“Yes, I’m fine. I may be the one that needs her head examined after this.”
“That’s my girl. Let’s go and talk with your father. I will broach the subject of the consult. If he says no to my request, then we will leave it at that. I don’t want to come between you and your father. You have fences to mend today, not break them down even more. Okay, sweet girl?”
“Jackson, if he loves me like he says he does, then he won’t say no. How could he? He is a doctor, the best in his field. He won’t be that closed-minded especially when it comes to the well-being of his patient.”
“That’s just it, baby, I’m not his patient. I am the son of the man that he believes destroyed his life. Once we cross that threshold, my mere presence will remind him of everything he lost. I don’t want to make you any more nervous than you already are, but Riley, you need to understand that he may not be receptive to me. He loves you and will welcome you with open arms, but I have to be prepared for a less than kind reception.”
“Jackson, let me handle my father. You asked me to give him a chance. Well, today is his chance. I’m extending the olive branch out to him, and it will be his choice to take it or not. I’m betting my father will take it. He loves me. I know our estrangement can’t be easy on him. Let’s go and find out.”
“One more thing, Riley,” I called out.
“What is it?” she answered with anxiety to her tone.
“You didn’t answer my question. Once again, you skated right over it.”
“Jackson, what more do you want me to say?”
“The one answer I need to hear.”
“Which is what?”
“Promise me you will truly try to mend these fences. You need your father in your life. He loves you, and I’m asking you to remember all those good feelings and memories you have with each other when you finally come face to face with him. That’s the answer I am looking for.”
She looked down to the floor and shuffled her foot back and forth. I had fallen in love with the most obstinate girl on the planet. She was full of fire and fight. Looking back up at me with a smile finally breaking through, she whispered, “I’ll try.”
I swept her up into a body crushing hug. I said to her, “Thank you! I love you, crazy girl…so very much. Don’t look now, but you’re a grown-up. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone.”
“Gee! Thanks, boyfriend, for the vote of confidence. Maybe I won’t keep you after all.”
“Oh yeah? Try getting rid of me, smartass!”
“Okay, since you put it that way. You do have a great ass. Okay, I’ll keep you. I guess I will marry you and love you crazy hard for the rest of my life.”
“I wouldn’t want it any other way. Love you, baby.”
I took her hand and led her to Richard, who was holding the elevator. We had been talking for nearly an hour, but I was thankful that we didn’t officially agree to a time with her father. He told Riley that he cleared his entire schedule for the day. That alone should have proven to her that he was serious about their meeting.
MY FATHER’S WAITING area looked as if it was featured in an interior design magazine. He had soft Italian leather couches in place of chairs. Exotic flowers and plants were all around the room. Fine artwork hung on the walls, and a huge fish tank lined one entire wall. A beverage center was set-up, along with an assortment of healthy snacks.
My father was aiming for his patients to be comfortable while here. He always said it was hard enough just dealing with the reason. He wanted to lift the sanitized feeling that people usually get when visiting a hospital. He put his personal touch on every surface in this room. He always did put his patients first. I already had a few tears forming in my eyes.
“Hello, Riley.” A familiar voice brought me out of my daydreaming. It was Gretchen, my father’s personal assistant.
“Hi, Gretchen! I would like you to meet my boyfriend, Jackson Reed. Jackson, this is Gretchen. She keeps my father on track. Without her mad skills, my father’s ship would sink.”
“Please make yourselves comfortable. I’m afraid it’s going to be a little while. A post-op patient of your father’s had a complication this morning, and your father had to perform an emergency procedure. I was just updated about ten minutes ago. He should be here shortly after he does his post-surgery monitoring.”
“I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, duty calls. Would you mind if we waited for him in his office?”
“I don’t see why you can’t do that. Go make yourselves at home, and I can bring you in some drinks while you wait. What can I get for you?”
We both answered at the same time that we were okay and thanked her for her hospitality. We left Richard out in the hall of my father’s office. He was content and out of the way. We didn’t want to call out attention to him. If we needed Richard, he would be at our side in seconds.
“Jackson, you look a bit pale. Has your headache returned?” I nervously asked him.
“I’m fine babe, just nervous. I’m going to shoot my father a text, letting him know that we are safe and sound. I’m surprised he hasn’t called me ten times already.”
“He could have already spoken to Richard, and he would have updated him.”
“You’re right, he could have, but I still should reach out t
o him.”
Me: Dad. Arrived in Maryland. No worries. Waiting on Dr. Briggs. Lunch to follow. I will call you later. Jackson.
I hit the send button and not a minute later, my phone pinged with his response.
Walker: Sounds good, son. Richard has already updated me, but thank you for keeping in touch. Love, Dad.
Just reading his text made my heart hurt. I was racked with guilt. I should just bite the bullet and be honest with him. I was about to send him another text when the door pushed open. Dr. Briggs arrived with a full smile on his face, until his eyes found mine. Was my father right? Did he hate me on sight because of who I am? I guess I was about to find out.
I didn’t show my apprehension to Riley. She was already a bundle of nerves and didn’t need to worry about me too. No matter what happened here today, they needed to sort their problems out first and foremost.
“Hi, Daddy,” she managed to get out before her tears began to fall. I knew how much she missed her father. No matter what she had said to me up to now, I knew better. I saw the love they had for one another, and her reaction didn’t come as a surprise. Scooping his daughter up in his arms, he wasted no time hugging her back.
“Oh my sweet girl! I have missed you so much. Let me look at you. You look beautiful.”
“Thank you, daddy, you look good too. Aren’t you going to say hello to Jackson?”
“Of course I am, I just wanted to take you in and commit you to memory. It has been way too long since I have laid eyes on you. All my fault, by the way. I am so sorry, honey.”
“Daddy, we will get to all of that. Please say hello to Jackson.”
Oh, please don’t punch me sir. I know I look like my father, but I’m definitely not Walker Reed!
WITH HIS MANNERS back in check, my father extended his hand out to my boyfriend. They shook hands and exchanged smiles. Well that’s progress, let’s hope it gets better.
“How are you, Jackson?”
“I’m good sir. Thank you for asking.”
“Forgive me, son, but I thought it was just going to be Riley and me for lunch.”
“Daddy! You knew I was in New York with Jackson, and I told you that he would be joining me today.”
“No, I didn’t know anything Riley, and you want to know why? Because you have shut me out for months, and with not even offering a simple text in return. So please, give me a break.”
Taking the higher ground and remembering what Jackson told me, I took a breath and simply moved on from this hostility.
“Well, we are both here now,” I said, trying to maintain a calm demeanor and hold a smile. “So let’s go to lunch, and we can all catch up.”
Just as we were about to leave, Dr. Christopher McGovern entered my father’s office. He headed the Board of Directors at Johns Hopkins. He was the one that commissioned Jackson’s father to build my father’s wing. He also loved money. He could smell it a mile away like sharks do when blood is present in the water. He was smiling from ear to ear when he saw Jackson.
Dr. McGovern said to Jackson, “I heard the chatter that Mr. Reed was in the building. I hadn’t known it was the younger Reed but am happy just the same. How are you, son? What brings you here today?” He shook Jackson’s hand as if he was royalty or something. My father stood silent and was annoyed with his intrusion.
“I’m good, sir. I’m just here for a social call. Riley and I are having lunch with her father.”
“Is your father here in town?”
“Um…no sir. Just me.”
“That’s a shame, son. I would have enjoyed a conversation with him. Oh well, maybe next time. Anything you need while you are here, Jackson, you just let me know.”
“Will do, Dr. McGovern. Thank you.”
“Always a pleasure, Jackson. And please pass on my hello to your father.”
“I will sir.”
Oh my goodness! He didn’t even acknowledge my father. He just brown nosed my boyfriend. As if Jackson would fall for his fake pleasantries. Oh the hospital politics! What a bunch of bullshit. You have to hand it to Jackson. He has impeccable manners and has been around many McGovern’s in his life. He handled him like the pro.
As awkward as that was, my father took my hand and led me out of his office with Jackson following close behind. I looked over my shoulder to him, and Jackson just winked and assured me he was okay. Richard was keeping a safe distance behind us. I don’t think my father even noticed him. It was Richard’s job to be discreet and invisible. We didn’t need any new problems today.
My father chose Henningers Tavern. It was his home away from home with the long nights he spent at his hospital. I would have been okay with a burger place, but my father wanted to spoil me today. Henningers was fine dining with an eclectic mix of arty décor. It had amazing seafood to choose from.
We were seated at a secluded table at the far back of the restaurant. It was quieter here, as my father wanted to talk with me without any interruption. We ordered drinks and made ourselves comfortable. My right hand was linked with Jackson’s, a gesture my father did not miss. He cleared his throat and looked directly at me, ignoring Jackson completely.
“Riley, no matter how I begin my apology, this conversation will be a hard one to have. I am so very sorry for missing you when you left on your summer vacation. I broke my promise to you. That is one regret I will always carry with me. I also missed my baby girl’s prom. Another mistake that I still feel sick over. I guess I should be thankful to your mother for sending me pictures. Time away from you has given me the chance to reflect on many things. I can promise you that I am working on my anger. I’m embarrassed to admit that it took a right hook to my jaw to set me straight. I was on a destructive path, one I deeply regret. I am now on the right path and have begun the process of healing.”
He looked over at Jackson as he said his last sentence. I didn’t react to his comment. This was me listening, giving him a chance. I remained quiet, with Jackson holding my hand for support. Little did Jackson know, but this was exactly what I needed.
My father continued, “I should have never sold the house without discussing it with you first. All I can say is that I was allowing anger to lead me. I just couldn’t bear to live one more day in a house that I no longer considered our home.”
“Daddy, I don’t think we need to rehash everything. This meeting today is not about that. I have moved on from the house and you not being there when I left for my trip. What upsets me is the way you treated mom. The hurtful words you had said to her were cruel. How could you? You say that you are sorry? Well, apologize to my mother. Once you do that, I can begin to believe your apologies.”
“Riley, my relationship with your mother is complicated, to say the least, and I will not discuss it with you, especially not in front of him.”
So much for extending the olive branch. Jackson visibly shifted in his seat. My boyfriend looked like he was sitting on nails.
“Him? Really daddy? He has a name. His name is Jackson Walker Reed. Oops! I said the very name that is never to be mentioned. Kind of like Voldemort from Harry Potter. Note to self: Do not say the name ‘Walker.’ Oh man, there I go running my mouth again! Where are my manners? I guess I’m taking my cues from you today. Clearly, you forgot yours as well.”
“Now that’s enough out of you, little girl. I am your father. You will not disrespect me, especially in public. I understand you are angry with me, but this is not the place to show it. Show some restraint, Riley, and grow up.”
“Believe me, daddy, I am showing restraint. Sorry if I’m embarrassing you, but I thought we could have been civil with one another today, but clearly that is not the case. You want respect? I will gladly give it to you, but you also need to show respect to my boyfriend. Better get comfortable with it, daddy, because he’s not going anywhere.”
I refocused my attention back to Jackson, who clearly looked uncomfortable. Is he getting angry with me?
“Are you okay?” I asked him. “I’m sorry, Jack
son.”
“Riley, can I speak to you in private?” my boyfriend said to me.
I take his offered hand and walk with him to a more private area of the restaurant.
“What the hell was that back there?” Jackson asked me. “Riley, what happened to hearing each other out? You two are like stubborn bulls colliding with each other at full speed. I can’t believe your behavior toward your father. He’s trying, Riley. I thought you would too. You promised me.”
“No. I said I would try. And I did. Jackson, please don’t be angry with me. I can’t bear it. I’m sorry. I told you this was a bad idea. I’m clearly not ready for this conversation to happen.”
“You think? At this point babe, I’m not even going ask him about a consult.”
“Well, if that’s what you want, then let’s leave right now.”
“No! You don’t get off that easy, I will not let you. You are going back to that table. You will try, and this time, succeed. Work it out with your father. I mean it, Riley. No more tantrums. You are so much more than that girl who just spewed ugly insults at the one man she claims to love.”
“I do love my father. How can you say that to me?”
“Prove it. End of discussion. We’re here, and you’re going to talk with him.”
I was going to continue to plead my case when Jackson suddenly appeared unsteady on his feet. He quickly grabbed onto a chair for support.
“Jackson! Are you okay? Oh my God! I’m going to get Richard.”
“Relax. I’m fine. Just got dizzy for a second. Come. Let’s rejoin your father.”
We walked hand in hand back to our table. My instinct was to run and return to New York, but Jackson wasn’t having it. My father was sitting there, waiting with no expression on his face. I just wanted to scream at the top of my lungs right now. Jackson was too calm. It was almost making me nervous. He pulled out my chair and placed my linen napkin onto my lap. I looked at him lovingly, thinking all the while that I don’t deserve him.
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