He couldn't help but worry that it was unreasonable to ask her give up her life in Oregon to be with him. Climbing out of the bed, he stalked after her and roughly pulled her into his arms, burying his face into her hair. "I can't believe you want to be with someone like me."
"Why wouldn't I?"
"Because you're smart, beautiful. Shit, girl. You could have anyone you wanted. You should be with some fancy lawyer or something."
She laughed and, standing on tiptoes, kissed him gently on the lips. "Oh I've dated more than my fair share of lawyers, and they don't have half the integrity that you do. I know you, Joe. Who you are, what you do. I'm not stupid and I don't think life with you will always be easy. But you are the only person I can truly be myself with. Yes, I have a good job and a nice lifestyle, but what's really important to me is what's important to you. Family."
Joe returned the kiss, then, reluctantly, pulled away. He knew he'd never shake the feeling that she could do better, despite her reassurances. The life he led could be brutal and took its toll on old ladies. He had already decided that there would be no property patch and he would do his best to keep her away from the club. The greater the distance, the safer she and Amy would be.
Amy sat at the kitchen table watching as Beth made pancakes. "I wish you could stay."
"Me too, Amy. But I'll be back as soon as I can."
"For good?"
Beth grinned and Amy leapt to her feet and pulled her aunt into a bear hug. "I always knew you and Joe would get together eventually."
"Oh, did you now?"
"Yeah, ever since I was little. Nana Sophie knew it too. She's gonna be stoked."
"I'm not sure telling her is a good idea. Me and Joe want to keep things under wraps for now."
"Why? Oh, I get it. This is about mom ain't it?" She frowned. "You think she's gonna cause trouble?"
"Truthfully, I don't know. But Joe's worried she might try to keep you from him if she finds out."
"She can't do that. Can she?"
"Yes, she can, Amy."
"You can't keep it a secret forever."
"I know, and we don't want to. We just need a bit of breathing space. Does that make sense?"
"I guess." Amy sat back down. For over two months all she'd tried to do was get Joe to agree to her going back to Fillmore, but suddenly nothing was more important to her than being allowed to stay. She might never admit it, but she actually quite enjoyed going to school now and was starting to make friends. Her relationship with Joe was slowly starting to improve. He still drove her nuts, but the thought of being kept away from him terrified her. It wasn't that she didn't love her mom, but she loved him just as much. And she trusted him more.
Once showered, Joe made his way to the kitchen, hesitating as he overheard his name mentioned. He didn't mean to eavesdrop but hearing that Amy was genuinely pleased for them and finding out that, despite her protestations, she wanted to stay with him, was reassuring. He was still afraid that he'd be put in a position where he'd have to choose between her and Beth. More than anything, he wanted to keep his little family together.
TWENTY-SIX
Maria smiled as her five-year-old son checked outside yet again. He was almost beside himself with excitement at the prospect of seeing his big sister again. She, too, was looking forward to her daughter’s visit, although this was tempered with a degree of apprehension. Despite Joe’s reassurances that Amy was settling well into her new school and seemed to be calming down, she couldn’t help but worry that all those resentments would come bubbling to the surface when they saw each other. There could be no doubt that her past behavior had damaged the relationship she had with her daughter beyond repair. Amy loved her mom, but she would never fully trust her. Maria couldn’t blame her. She hadn’t been much of a mom, especially when Amy was small, and if it hadn’t been for Joe, his mom and Beth, the kid would have ended up in the system and lost to her forever.
She checked her reflection. She still had her looks and appeared much younger than her forty-one years. Maybe when Joe saw her he would fall in love with her all over again. His love for her was something else she'd managed to destroy. It was something she had taken for granted. Never once had it occurred to her that there would come a time that he wouldn’t be there to pick up the pieces.
“They’re here!” She smiled as Jack ran to the front door and out towards the big red truck that had pulled up outside. She may have let her daughter down, but when it came to her son, she was a perfect mommy. He was an easy kid, compliant and laid back and since sobering up, she had thrown herself into caring for him in a way she never had with Amy.
Watching as her daughter climbed out of the truck, sweeping the little boy up in her arms and, followed closely by Joe, walked towards the front door, she felt her breath catch in her throat. It was a glimpse of what could’ve been if she hadn’t have fucked it all up. She didn’t know what stung more. That she’d lost Joe or that he’d taken her daughter with him.
Joe followed Amy towards the house. He would really prefer not to have anything to do with Maria, but Amy was her kid and it seemed right that he gave her a progress report. He stood back as she greeted her daughter, then followed them into her house and stood, leaning on the kitchen counter, waiting, until they’d finished saying their hellos. Surreptitiously, he watched the woman he'd once loved as she fussed over her oldest child. Even after all these years, she was still stunning. Her blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders in thick waves, framing that pixie-like face, with those deep brown eyes and full lips that just begged to be kissed. She wore a thin cotton sundress that clung to her svelte body that maybe now, as middle-age approached, was a little too bony. She looked up, and as her eyes met his, she smiled. “Like what you see, Joe?”
He shrugged. “You always were beautiful, M. That ain’t changed.”
She turned and stepped closer. So close that he could feel the heat from her body and smell the vanilla shampoo she always used. “You’re looking pretty good yourself.”
She looked at him though her thick, black lashes and ran her tongue along her top lip. Joe could feel his body starting to respond, the way it always had. He swallowed. “You need to back off, M.”
“You sure that’s what you want?”
With his hands on her upper arms he pushed her firmly away from him. “Yeah. It’s what I want.”
Amy frowned as she watched their exchange. She couldn’t let her mom jeopardize Joe’s relationship with Beth. As she moved to intervene, she gave a sigh of relief as he pushed her mom away. She should have given him more credit, but monogamy had never been his strong point, and her mother always had some kind of hold over him.
She had always believed that Beth and Joe belonged together and that he loved the wrong sister, so when they had finally pulled their heads out of their asses and got together she couldn’t have been more pleased. But Beth wasn’t like her mom, wasn’t like the whores that pushed up on him on a Friday night. She deserved respect and commitment, and Amy worried he might let her down. His eyes met hers and he gave a tiny smile, a silent communication that he had this under control.
Maria still had no idea that Joe and her sister were together. She would find out eventually and when she did, the shit was going to really hit the fan. Of that Amy had no doubt. Her mom had never really believed things were done between her and Joe, despite the years they had spent apart. She had always thought that, given the right circumstance, she could win him back again, and Amy dreaded to think of the depths she would sink to achieve her aims.
Taking her brother’s hand, she led him into the living room and switched on the TV. She knew that Joe would want to talk to her mom about her, and the sooner he did that, the sooner he could get out of there. He would be staying at his mom’s. He hadn’t seen her for ages and was keen to spend some time with her. As far as Amy was concerned, though, the further away he was from her mom, the happier she would be.
~ oOo ~
Sophia leaned back
in her armchair, forcing herself to relax. Joe would be arriving soon, and she could hardly wait to see him. Since he had been helping with the cost of her meds and paying for someone to come round to help her with housework a couple of times a week, things had improved. Her back still hurt most of the time, but at least now that she was taking her meds regularly, she was more mobile and could climb the stairs to bed every night. She looked up as she heard the front door open and her son walked in and, bending over, kissed her on the cheek. “Joe. It’s so good to see you.”
“Good to see you too, Ma.” He sat on the sofa opposite her. “How you been?”
“Good. Better. The meds are helping a lot.” She smiled. “I’ve made a chili, I hope you’re hungry.”
“Starving.” He grinned. “It’s been too long. I miss your cooking.”
As they sat at the table in her cozy little kitchen, Sophia couldn’t keep the smile from her face. She had long since gotten used to him being away for long periods, and there had been times when he drove her to distraction. But he was her life, and she loved times like this, when it was just the two of them. “How’s Amy?”
“She’s doing good.”
Sophia rolled her eyes. No one could ever accuse Joe of talking too much. “She still giving you a hard time?”
“Yeah. Kid’s got a temper. She is getting better. Sometimes we can go for whole days without her slamming doors and throwing stuff.” He chuckled. “Please tell me I wasn’t like that.”
“Oh Joe, you were an absolute nightmare. If you weren’t getting suspended from school for fighting, you were getting picked up by the cops for god knows what.” She grinned. “The only reason I wasn’t on the receiving end of your temper was because you were never home.”
“Then I would like to apologize. I’m sorry, Ma.”
“Apology accepted.” She took his hand and laughed. “It wasn’t all bad, and you’ve made it up to me a hundred times over.”
“When I’m not getting arrested for fighting or god knows what.”
“Well, some things never change. But you’re doing right by Amy and me.”
He took a deep breath. “I got some news, Ma.” He grinned at her concerned expression. “Beth came to stay a while back, and, er, we kinda got together. As soon as she’s worked her notice, she will be moving to Seattle with me.”
“Oh Joe, that is wonderful news.” She frowned. “How did Maria take it?”
“Well, that’s the thing. We haven’t told her.”
“You can’t keep it a secret forever.”
“I know. But we want some breathing space. You know what she’s like Ma, I don’t want her taking Amy away.”
“You really think she’d do that?”
“Oh, I know she would. Amy’s more settled than she’s been for a long time. But M won't care about that. She’ll trample all over that kid if it means she can hurt me.”
Sophia nodded; her son was right. Maria might be sober now and, to all intents and purposes, had turned her life around. But she’d always hung onto the hope that she and Joe would get back together. On the rare occasion she called, he was all she wanted to talk about, and there could be no doubt that finding out he was with her younger sister would bring out that vindictive streak she’d always possessed. “You’re going to have to tread carefully, son.”
“I know.”
They ate in silence for a while until it was broken by Sophia. “Maria mentioned that her ex had died.” She looked carefully at the man sitting opposite. “You hear anything about that?”
“Yeah. Fucker killed himself.”
“That’s what I heard. You were away then, if I remember rightly.”
“I’m away a lot.”
“Yes, you are.”
“Something you wanna say, Ma?”
“No. I just remember that Beth was staying with me at the time, and how she didn’t seem that surprised when she heard the news. She mentioned that he’d been arrested for having pictures of kids on his computer.” Her eyes met his. “As I said before. Tread carefully, Joe. If Maria is pissed at you and puts two and two together….”
“There ain’t nothing to worry about. It was suicide. Period.”
“Well, if you’re sure.”
“I’m sure.”
He stood and walked out to the back yard, where he leaned on the wall and lit a cigarette. He was sure that Maria had no idea of his whereabouts when Rob met his end, and even if she had suspicions, there was no proof that he had anything to do with his death.
He turned as his mom came out to join him. She sat down with a wince on an old folding garden chair and he frowned. Despite her reassurances, she was still in a lot of pain, and she seemed to be shrinking before his eyes. Joe was a fixer. He put things right. But he couldn’t fix this. His mom was getting old, and there was nothing he could do about it.
Seeing his expression, she smiled. “I really am okay, son.”
“Would you tell me if you wasn’t?”
“Of course.”
“You’re a lousy liar, Ma.”
She grinned and, closing her eyes, raised her face towards the sun, enjoying its warming rays. “So how’s Seattle?”
“Good. Cold, but good.” He looked out over the barren plot that was her back yard. “Amy got the chance to meet her father.”
“Oh. Wow! I didn’t know you knew who he was.” She glanced at him as he shrugged. “How did it go?”
“Okay, I guess. Amy has a lot of anger there, but Barney….”
“Barney? Barney West? But he’s…”
“My brother and my friend. Yeah I know.”
“Oh, son. That must’ve hurt. How did you find out?”
“Did the math. She looks like him, I dunno, Ma. I had my suspicions, so I confronted him and he confirmed it. He slept with my woman, so yeah. It hurt, betrayal always does. But me and Maria weren’t together at the time and Amy was the result.” He shrugged. “I stopped being angry a long time ago. And who her real dad is don’t change nothing. We might not have the same DNA, but Amy is my kid. Always has been, always will be.”
TWENTY-SEVEN
It would take fourteen hours to get from California to Seattle in his truck. If he had been alone, Joe would have done it in one hit, stopping only for food, coffee and gas. As he was traveling with Amy, however, it seemed prudent to split the journey over two days. While it was true it would be easier on her than if they were on his bike, there was still no way he could be persuaded to spend such a long period of time trapped with her in his truck. As it was, after only four hours, she was whining that she was bored and bitching about his choice of music, as if it was somehow his fault that she had lost her iPod.
She had been living with him for nine months now, and in that time Joe had discovered hidden reserves of patience that he had no idea he possessed. He loved the skinny teenager that was currently pouting in the passenger seat next to him, but there had been times when he had come dangerously close to losing his shit with her.
It didn’t help that in the last six months, he had only seen Beth once. Work commitments had meant that she couldn’t move to Seattle as quickly as they would have liked and, although they spoke practically every day, Joe was struggling with the concept of monogamy in a long distance relationship. He was doing pretty well, even if the muscles in his right arm were now twice as big as in his left, but if he didn’t get laid soon, he swore he would explode.
“C’mon, Joe. Please can we stop? I need to pee.”
“You should’ve gone when I stopped for gas.”
“I didn’t need to go then. I’m hungry too.”
Joe rolled his eyes. Despite her appearance, Amy ate like a horse. He had no idea where she put it all, but ever since she was tiny, she’d always had a healthy appetite. “Okay, there’s a truck stop up the road, we can stop there.”
“I ain't peeing in a truck stop.”
“Well it’s there or nowhere, sugar.”
“It’s alright for you. You don�
�t have to sit down. Those places are disgusting.”
“You’ll have to go in the bushes, then. This is the only stop for miles.”
“We’re only five miles from Sacramento. Why can’t we get something to eat there?”
“If we do, will you shut the fuck up?”
“I promise.”
“Fine, but it’s gonna put at least another half hour on our journey.”
Something else Joe was learning was compromise. They would butt heads on a regular basis, and nine times out of ten, he wouldn’t budge. But every so often, like when he was trapped in a truck with her, it made sense to let her have her own way.
The diner was small and the food was delicious. Amy watched as the man she considered to be her dad tore into his chicken. She may have told him that she hated him on an almost daily basis, and wasn’t above throwing the occasional ‘you’re not my dad’ barb in his direction, but the truth was, even when he was driving her nuts, she adored him. She grinned. “Thanks Joe. You’re the best.”
“I know, sugar.”
“Modest, too.”
“Yep. You done?”
“Yeah, ready when you are.” As they left the building, she slipped her arm through his. “Joe?”
“Yes, sugar.”
“Can I change the station on the radio?”
“Absolutely not.”
“But it’s old man music.”
“That’s cuz I’m an old man, sugar.”
“True.” She grinned and nudged him. “Don’t worry, Joe. I’ll take care of you in your old age.”
“God help me.” He climbed into the truck. “C’mon, sugar, shake that skinny ass.”
The relief as Joe opened the door of his apartment was palpable. For three hours they hadn’t spoken after their latest argument had run out of steam. Amy pushed past him and, storming into her room, collapsed on the bed with a sigh. The term argument implied a two-way thing. But of course, arguments with Joe were different.
A Family Man Page 16