by J H Cardwell
John spoke in the calmest voice. “For starters, I took you to the emergency department in Wilmington. They monitored you, fixed you up, and made sure you had a chaperone to watch you like I said before…”
“Wait! That doesn’t explain why you felt the need to bring me all the way here. Why didn’t you fish my keys out of my purse and take me home?”
“I felt responsible for you, and while I had agreed to watch over you, I had to come home.” His face fell, lips sternly in a thin line. “I had an 8 AM web-conference this morning with our board, and unfortunately, I couldn’t miss it for anything.” His words trailed off at the end. Something resembling sadness and hurt passed over John’s expression. “Anyhow, I was hoping you would be more understanding. I agree. I should have told you as soon as you woke up. I forgot you didn’t know we were in my home in Charlotte.”
I wanted to ask him what was wrong. I wanted to feel sorry for him. My defenses almost failed me. Almost.
“John.” I took in a deep breath. “Please take me home.” I couldn’t bear to look at him. His expression was one of confusion and possibly relief. I’m not sure he really wanted me here anymore than I wanted to be here.
“As you wish Chloe.” John said with a flatness that hadn’t been there until now. “I’ll call for the car to be brought around.” Well, this is new I thought. John typically drove himself everywhere. A sideways glance let me know he was aware I was thinking it too. “Being in the city and parking being horrendous, this just…well it just works better.”
Fair? No, life was anything but fair. Here I was wondering how I was going to pay my tuition much less my cable bill, and John has a driver at his service. I was shaking my head in disbelief.
“How old are you John? Ninety? I can’t believe you don’t park your car yourself and walk. Must be nice is all I’m sayin’.”
My eyes were met with John’s intensive stare; “The car service has always come with the Rider name and company benefits. I refused it, Chloe, until I moved into this apartment…”
“You mean Penthouse.” It was a statement, not a question.
“Okay, Penthouse.” He said through clenched teeth. Yeah, I was itching for an argument. “My driver, Gill, has been with the family for a very long time. My father…” He shook his head. “Look, I just want you to get home safely.”
For some reason, this caused a pain in my chest. “You’re not coming with me?” I asked too quickly and eagerly. “I mean that’s right, you’re not coming with me,” I said more confidently.
Chapter 8
A flash of amusement passed over his features, momentarily, before the seriousness ensued. “No. I have another meeting shortly. I can’t leave. I…I was planning to take you back this evening.” He was looking at me directly now. “Although, you seem so anxious to leave, and I don’t want you to stay any…” The ringing of John’s phone broke our quarrel. John gave a quick glance to his phone. “Excuse me please.”
“Yes.” John answered shortly. “I know. Listen. Look. Okay. Yeah, whatever.” Hmmm. A definite one-sided conversation. Before I could ask who it was, John was answering for me.
“Brett. He’s not happy with me as you might have guessed. And to be honest, the tables have never been turned like this…ever.” At the notice of my confused expression, John continued. “Usually I’m the one making Brett second guess his decisions, and correcting him. This time…” He paused shaking his head. “Why did you let him go?” Wow. That came out of left field.
“I, uh, I…Let him go? What the hell does that mean?” How dare he?
“You know Chloe, you practically ran him into the arms of Celeste. Now that girl’s a charmer and man is she…”
“John! I mean…Brett and I are better off as friends. I can’t dictate who he dates. We never were really meant to be more than that. I love him, as a friend. You, of all people, should know what I mean.” I physically winced as I said the words. I knew that was a low blow. My defenses were up. This is what I did. I pushed away, and usually hard. John closed his eyes at the thought of Reese, flinching at my verbal slap. She loved him more like a friend, and a protector…just like I love Brett.
“I got you Chloe.” He glanced down at his phone, and allowing a couple of moments of silence. “Brett’s on his way though, he’s boiling mad that I didn’t call him. He still thinks he needs to always be your body guard even now, even if he’s engaged.”
Engaged?
Did John say that right?
“Wh-wh-what do you mean engaged? Engaged to be m-married?!” Surely I heard him wrong.
“Uh, Chloe, what other kind of engaged would you think I meant?” John must have noticed my solemn expression. Out of the corner of my eye I saw his hand go to the bridge of his nose.
“I’m sorry Chloe. I thought you already knew.” He let out a long, slow breath. “Brett and Celeste are planning to get married. Celeste is all hyped up over it too...you know, booking all kinds of crazy shit already and...okay, I’m shutting up now.”
I backed up in the living room until the back of my knees hit the couch or chair or something. Without looking, I sat down, hoping I wouldn’t land on the floor, and wishing I could rewind time.
“Chloe, are you okay?” Geez when did John get so close to me. He sat down beside of me, our legs touching. His voice was quiet. “I didn’t think it would be this important to you. Is it...Are you…jealous? Surely that’s not the case.”
Before I could speak, the front door flew open and in walked Brett.
“Baby, what in the hell happened to you?! Oh my God, look at your head. Shit!” He was inches from me, and John tensed up beside of me. Before I knew it, Brett was shoving John’s shoulders as he fell back onto the couch.
“Bro – Why the hell didn’t you call somebody?! I would have taken her to her place, she didn’t need to stay here…with you!” He shoved John again. This time, John jumped up and shoved back. Hard. Brett fell on the floor after ramming up against the oversized chair beside of the couch.
“Enough!”
I shot up and held both arms straight between them to keep them from going at it again. As calmly as my voice would carry at the moment, I turned to Brett and spoke.
“When were you going to tell me, Brett, huh?” This time I shoved Brett in the chest. “Engaged! To her! What in the hell are you thinking?” I started pacing the room. John sat back down, an amused shit-ass grin on his face.
“Chloe, I didn’t tell you because I knew you would over react.” I started to come at him again. “Yes, over react like you are now!” He held his hands up in mock defense.
I stopped short with my fists by my side. “I mean, this is too quick Brett. I…We…I mean you’ve only been seeing her for about four months. You just declared your love to me right before you met her, for crying out loud.”
Brett’s gaze quickly shot to John. He was embarrassed. I was sure of it. I could care less at the moment. I trudged along. “And, she just started dating you to get back at me.”
“Chloe, you’re not being rational. She isn’t trying to get back at you. She knows you don’t love me like that. We all know you don’t love me like that Chloe.” Now he was pacing. Rubbing a hand over his face, he walked over to me. “Chloe, look at me. You said you wanted me happy. Celeste loves me. She does. She makes me happy. I make her happy.” He paused for a moment, his voice becoming quieter. “You don’t know how good it feels to have my feelings reciprocated for a change.”
If I could crawl in a hole now, I would.
I took a deep breath in and sat back down, staring at the floor. I finally spoke. “Well, do what you have to do Brett. Go marry her and live happily the flip after. Make lots of Celeste and Brett babies, and I hope you feel that love from here to eternity.”
Brett kneeled down in front of me, grabbing my hands. “Babe, I wanted to be sharing this with you. Is this bitterness I detect due to jealousy? If so, I can…well, we can talk about this. You know my true feelings…” I quickl
y shot him my answer.
“No.”
Brett looked suddenly angry.
“No? No to what Chloe?” His mouth was drawn tight. His breathing kicked up a notch.
“No. It. Is. Not. Jealousy. Not in the least.” I brought my eyes to stare directly in his. “I’m happy for you Brett, but looks like we just lost friends…each of us. There is no way in hell I’m dealing with her shit. Sorry. Not even you are worth that.”
He stood up quickly and stepped back never taking his eyes off of me. “Well then. I’ll leave you two to it. Whatever it is.” He shot daggers at John and turned to leave. Making it to the door, he grabbed the handle and stood there for a moment. Without looking at me, he said, “I’m still here for you Chloe. I want you to know that. One day you’re going to hate how you’re all alone after pushing everyone that loves you away.” With that, the door slammed shut. My shoulders jumped in response.
I’m not sure how long I sat there, staring at the floor. Finally, the silence was broken when John’s soft voice interrupted my internal chastisement.
“Chloe. Are you okay?” He was quiet again for a moment, as I never responded. I could see his chest rise and fall out of my peripheral vision and then he suddenly rose and walked away. The next I knew, the driver was asking if I was ready to leave.
“What? Yes, of course. Sorry. I…” Looking around, I didn’t see John anywhere. Part of me wanted to thank him, part of me wanted to scream at him. Either way, the most of me chose not to say or do anything, but leave.
Chapter 9
I woke up confused, my whole body jumping awake. After dragging myself into our apartment in Wilmington the night before, I found I was just waking up from a ten hour ‘nap’. “What in the hell?” I said out loud, my hand flying to my forehead. Oh yeah, the bandage was still there. I realized what must have startled me when I heard footsteps coming down the hall, then my door creaking open letting in the light from the hallway.
“Chloe?” Maura. Oh thank God. “Chloe, hey, how are you?” Maura spoke in her soft, comforting voice.
“Hmmm” I sat up and scooted to the edge of the bed while tossing my feet to the floor. “Hey girl. I…I’m probably a wreck.” I cleared my throat. “I…”
“Hey,” Maura hugged me. “No need to explain.” She touched my bandaged head. “John told Harrison everything. Thank goodness he was at the club to scoop you up, huh?”
“If you say so.” I kicked off the rest of the covers and decided it was time I took a shower and changed. I needed to wash the last few days off of me, and try to move forward.
“Yes. I would definitely say so. Mel couldn’t have taken care of you from what I understand, and Brett had already left with Celeste.”
She just had to bring that up! I blew out a harsh breath and grabbed my robe; unfortunately, Maura didn’t take the hint. “Chloe,” she continued. “John says you’re torn up about Brett being engaged. Isn’t this what you wanted? For Brett to move on and realize he’s not really in love with you after all? I mean it’s been over six months. What’s really going on here?”
“Pfftt. I…well, I just didn’t know it would happen so quickly – I guess.” The last part was more of a whisper. I knew Maura was going to have a field day dissecting all of this, all of ME in this. Her look of pity told me I was right.
“Awww Chloe. You know Brett has always drawn the women. I mean he is handsome, fun, sweet, and he is nearly twenty-eight years old, not to mention wealthy. Need I say more?” Even if I wanted her to shush, there wasn’t a chance. She continued with the badgering. “Is it because you don’t like Celeste?” Maura walked closer, completely invading my personal space. Making sure we connected eye to eye she said, “Or is this more about you not being sure about your feelings for Brett?”
Was it? What was the real issue? What is wrong with me?! I can’t answer that as confused as I am. I do love Brett, but I am not in love with him. Even if I was, I would never make him commit to me and let my bitterness ruin his fun-loving nature. He needs more than that. He needs more than me. He needs…Celeste. I guess I didn’t want it to be true, but – it was. Keeping any of that honesty from ringing through, I simply said, “No Maura, I’m not in love with Brett. I didn’t think Celeste was good enough for him, that’s all. John blew it all out of proportion, that’s what really happened.”
“Mmmm, Hmmm.” Maura stared at me knowingly for a few beats, then she took in a deep breath and started to walk out of my room. With Maura now turning back towards me, I rolled my eyes. Is she not done yet? “Speaking of John, it’s really sad about his situation. Tsk, tsk, I hate to hear what he’s going through.” With that, she walked into her room across the hall.
I paused for a moment, mulling through everything I knew to be so of John right now. Is there something he told me about that I don’t recall at this moment? I followed after her, swinging my robe over my arm. “What do you mean ‘his situation’ Maura? I don’t know of anything sad happening…unless you mean he works all the time, except when he’s meddling in other people’s business!” I said, tapping my chest so she would know I mean me when I said the word ‘people’.
“Oh, you don’t know? I just assumed you knew after staying the night with him and all.” She wagged her eyebrows up and down at me.
“What!? You can’t be serious! Nothing happened with us. Why…why are you doing that, that thing with your eyebrows!? John and I…I mean, Pfft! Just NO, I mean NO!” I got ready to turn around and storm off, but I was curious now. John did rescue me, if you can call it that, and I sort of owed him, although I would never admit it. “But, what, I mean…sad? What happened?”
Maura let out a loud sigh and she looked at me with a solemn expression for a moment. “His father’s dying Chloe. He found out a couple of weeks ago. He was taking it okay, I mean they have never been close – at least not as close as John would have liked – but he wasn’t torn up until he found out he was losing the company to his uncle. John pretty much lost his entire childhood to Rider Industries, and all of his adulthood thus far has been spent on the company. But, it seems his uncle will run the company once his father…well, after he dies or becomes unable to run it, whichever comes first.”
“Oh.” Is all I could say, moving over to the mirror, and looking at my sorry self for the first time today. “I hate that for John, I really do, but if his uncle has invested as much or more in the company, then he deserves it as well, right?” I was missing something surely.
“You would certainly think that; unless you knew that his uncle had just come onto the scene in the last year and a half and has terrible business sense. The only reason he was allowed to come into the picture at all is because Sam’s dad, and John’s dad had a falling out, finally!” She looked at me, and we both agreed with our expressions on this. “And he needed overseas help. He and his wife and two children picked up and moved to Saudi Arabia without any questions. Mainly, as John says, to have all of their expenses paid, and to be in line for when his father did have to retire from the company or passes away, whichever comes first? In case you didn’t know, his dad waited late in life to have children, and didn’t have his only child, John, until he was forty-eight years old. His mom is ten years younger than his dad.” Wow! That was a mouthful!
After a few moments of digesting all that she had told me, I was still confused. “So, why doesn’t John just ask to run the company? Surely as smart and as business savvy as John seems, his dad would let him.” I knew John was good at his job. He had already been written up in Forbes Magazine as the up and coming top executive to run Rider Industries. His ideas on oil marketing and U. S. leaderships in the safety department of his rigs had also won many awards - at least that’s what I read. Okay! I do keep up with him, who wouldn’t?!
“You need to ask him, Chloe. There’s more that he’s not talking about, is all I’m saying.” Why would I care is what my mind was saying, but my mouth didn’t agree.
“Tell me. I know you know.” And why w
as she being so secretive?
After the seconds ticked off, Maura finally looked at me. “He’s not a cookie cutter, family man, Chloe. According to his dad, the board has mandated that the new CEO be an established, married, stable, leader. John doesn’t fit that profile at all on paper. Needless to say, while he’s been sad and worried about his dad, he’s also pissed at his dad.”
Whoa. This was going to be really hard on John. “But, aren’t his mom and dad divorced, well sort of anyway? At least that’s what I remember both Reese and Brett saying.”
“Yeah, they haven’t lived together in the same house since John was a kid. But on paper – well, on paper, they are still happily married. From what Harrison says, they house hop year round with all of the homes they own over the world and never have to run into each other.” Geez, poor John. That’s a messed up childhood and even adult life. “They have only been seen together at charity events where it’s SO important for them to be seen as a family. Although, John quit playing that charade a LONG time ago. His grandfather started this business with a strong sense of family and his board of trustees, who are older by the way, think it needs to still stand firm on that.”
“So, what’s John going to do?” Now I was curious, and vested more than I had meant to be.
I jumped when Maura’s cell phone rang.
We both looked at each other, then at her phone, like how dare we get interrupted. It was Harrison.
As she talked with Harrison, I motioned I was getting in the shower. I guess we would have to take that conversation up later.
Chapter 10
The pandemonium was clearing up and reality was setting in. I was jobless, and owed enormous debt! That’s what it all boiled down to. I had tried to no avail to a get a job at several local shops. To top it all off, my car had broken down, and of course, I couldn’t afford to fix it; so I was taking the community bus if and when I left the apartment. Maura offered to help me out, but she was on a pretty tight budget herself, and I wasn’t about to make my problems cause her to suffer.