by Riley Scott
“Any idea how long you’ll be gone?” Brittany asked.
Chris sighed. It had been left so open-ended when she left town and she still had no more to go on. “I have no idea. I know that I’m going to try to garner a bunch of interviews, photo shoots and some publicity stops, all as part of a spearheaded campaign to drive up her positive press. I’m not sure how long that will take or if she’ll fire me before I finish the job. She’s kind of a hothead.”
“Sounds like it,” Brittany said and Chris could just imagine her shaking her head, giving Chris the “stay away from that” look Brittany often wore at bars whenever a girl tried to give Chris her number. “After all, nothing sounds fun about a masochistic child hell-bent on self-destruction.”
Her choice of words made Chris laugh loudly. “I needed this,” she said. “Sorry to vent. I just needed to get that all out.”
“Anytime,” Brittany said, her voice serious and sincere. “You know that’s what I’m here for. We’re best friends. You’ve talked me off the ledge a time or two, and talked me out of blowing up a girl’s house a time or two.”
Her words trailed off for a moment, and Chris recalled the times Brittany referenced. They had always teetered on the edge of more than friends, but Brittany was right. They were best friends.
“We’ve gone through tough times, breakups, new starts and more. We listen to each other. We’re there for each other and I want you to remember that, even while you’re out there on the road, okay?”
“Okay,” Chris promised. “Thank you.”
As the conversation went on, Chris felt better. They chatted about Brittany’s job, about Paco and about life. By the time they hung up, Chris felt more relaxed—but tired. She wished she had a place to go lie down for a little while and just let some of the craziness fade away. She let out a long sigh and headed for the arena, missing her stable life back home.
Inside the hall, hundreds waited already. She felt lost in the sea of people—adrift among a crowd of smiling faces. All she wanted to do was find a hole to disappear into.
A clearly intoxicated teenage girl bumped into her as she took her seat next to Chris. “Sorry,” she mumbled, her words easily slurring together. “Are you excited about the show?”
Chris nodded, not wanting to dull the shine in the young girl’s eyes.
“Raven is my favorite singer of all time,” the girl babbled. Chris called upon everything in her power to offer up a smile, before turning her attention to the empty stage. She wondered who was checking IDs or if this girl had been drinking before the show. She didn’t care and tried to block out her constant commentary.
Chris listened to the music, watched Raven move on stage and tried to remember that this was a woman she was beginning to respect, to enjoy on a personal level. Even so, pettiness crept up within her, making her feel every bit like a jealous lover. She scanned the crowd for Tanya.
Her heart pounded, and she grimaced at the thought of the trashy woman, the way she had excluded Chris. She tried to tell herself that her immediate and intense dislike was aimed solely at her rudeness. But she knew herself too well to think that was really the case. It was jealousy, plain and simple, and it was ugly. Her mind flashed to the way Tanya had so crassly put her hands all over Raven’s body, all while giving Chris a “go to hell” look.
Thankful when she couldn’t find her in the crowd, Chris tried to focus on the music. She just wasn’t feeling it tonight. She didn’t want to sit in a concert hall full of hot, sweaty people, much less tolerate the drunk teenager next to her yelling, cheering and generally making an ass of herself. I’m getting old, Chris thought to herself, realizing that she once would have been doing exactly the same. Now though, she was tired. She was tired of so many things—mostly of trying so hard, just to get tossed to the side like a pair of dirty socks.
As the show came to an end, Chris wanted nothing more than to disappear into the sea of people and then be back at her house in her Jacuzzi bubble bath. She sighed, realizing those creature comforts were too far away. She looked longingly at the crowd, wanting to follow one of them home instead of having to trek back to her home on wheels and party it up with complete strangers all night.
“It’s no wonder you weren’t a rock star,” she muttered to herself, deciding that she wanted out of there as soon as possible. She needed to breathe. She made a beeline for the long hallways of dressing rooms, bolting through the back exit and inhaling fresh air.
She threw her hands out by her side, looking up to a full moon and the mountains of New Mexico illuminated in the distance. Forcing herself to breathe deeply, she worked on calming herself back down.
She reminded herself that this was temporary and she was going to get to go home eventually. She briefly felt some sadness for Raven’s gypsy life, but just as quickly as it came, she pushed it away. She needed to prioritize her job, feelings and concerns about being liked be damned.
“This is work,” she whispered to herself. “It’s nothing more.” Sure, she might be getting a behind-the-scenes look at a life she had always wondered about and she might be getting to spend every day with a woman who had been her celebrity crush for years, but this was work. It was an assignment, nothing more than another challenge at which she was going to succeed.
Once her heart rate had returned to normal, she turned on her heel and walked back to the bus. Thankful that none of the crew had returned she went straight to her “room” and shut the door behind her. Closing her eyes, she relished the softness of the pillows. In an instant, her tired body gave way, letting her finally rest.
Exuberant shouting just outside her window startled her. Slightly disoriented, she glanced at the clock. Only ten minutes had passed, but it felt like she had been asleep for hours. Blinking, she tried to force herself awake.
“Let’s do shots,” she heard Tanya’s high-pitched and irritating voice as the door of the bus flew open. She could hear people rummaging through cabinets and then rushing back outside.
She wanted to scream. She reminded herself of her pep talk. She was going to paint on a smile and handle this like she would any unpleasant work situation.
“She’s a client,” Chris said under her breath, before taking a quick look in the mirror. She touched up her makeup and smiled at her reflection. For just a moment, she looked at the eyes staring back at her, remembering the same strong and somewhat wild green eyes of her father. She looked at her smile and remembered that she was beautiful. Regardless of what the night might hold, or how catty Tanya might be, Chris was determined to make the best of it.
With her head held high, she emerged out in front of the bus, and followed the noise. There was a party already. Chris fought to keep her expression neutral. She had never seen it quite like this. On the pavement in front of the bus, people were scurrying to set up speakers and a makeshift dancing area. Nearby, two scantily clad women were lurking. It appeared that the party people had arrived.
“There you are,” a husky voice shouted from behind her, causing her to turn and face a glassy-eyed Raven whose head was bopping along a little too freely with the music. “I’ve been watching for you.”
Chris nodded. “I was inside,” she said, trying to catch her breath, suddenly taken back to feeling completely out of place. “I was just stepping outside to smoke.”
“I’ll come with you,” Raven offered.
As she caught Tanya’s narrow-eyed stare, she considered dismissing Raven’s offer, but she shrugged and nodded instead, turning to lead the way away from the crowd. Once in an open space, she gulped in fresh air, silently willing this night to turn around—even though she still couldn’t quite pinpoint what had her so jumbled.
“What’s wrong?” Raven asked, sidling up beside her and lighting a cigarette in one fluid motion.
“Nothing,” Chris lied.
“Ah, come on,” Raven urged, putting an arm around Chris’s shoulders. “I spent all day with you and this isn’t how you were acting earlier.”
Chris felt an odd sensation, as if she was being watched. Turning around quickly, she saw Tanya peeking out of the bus window, her eyes flashing with anger. Her long, red fingernails tapping on the edge of the windowsill seemed to scream at Chris.
“I think it’s safe to say your girlfriend isn’t too pleased about you coming out here,” Chris said, lighting her own cigarette and taking a deep drag.
Raven laughed, amusement spreading as quickly as her grin grew. “She’s not my girlfriend,” she said with a shrug. “She can get upset about whatever she wants.”
“What is she then?” Chris asked, giving into her curiosity and deciding that if Raven was going to discuss things freely, so would she. “A groupie?”
Raven’s laugh grew, until it sounded hearty and she wordlessly shook her head. Once she had regained her composure, she faced Chris with a raised eyebrow. “I like that you think I have groupies.”
“Don’t you?”
“No,” Raven said. “Fans that I fuck, on occasion. Groupies, no. And Tanya is neither. She’s my New Mexico road stop for items out of the ordinary.”
Chris nodded in understanding. “I suppose that’s your nice way of saying she’s a dealer.”
“It’s all in the wording,” Raven said, a half grin lifting the right corner of her mouth.
“You should be doing my job then,” Chris said, taking a long drag and opting for a subject change under Tanya’s hostile glare out the window. “What I do is all about positive messaging. Smoking and drinking are not vices—they’re hobbies. PMS does not make women moody—it gives them versatility to figure out how they feel about a certain situation. I’m not indecisive—I’m simply weighing my options and giving my situation the attention that it deserves.”
Raven laughed and shook her head. “Are you going to do some of that voodoo on me?”
“We’re already doing it,” she said. “There’s been nothing but positive stories on you for the last three weeks. As you’ll recall, even before I hit the ground, we were working in partnership with Frank to issue statements and set up partnerships. The results have been great. We’re going to keep doing that and we’ll distract from the bad. In addition to the charity partnership we’ve agreed to, I’ve got a slew of press junkets lined up for the next couple of weeks. We have a stop in Fresno at a youth center on our way through. We’ve planned backstage visits with some Make-A-Wish kids. You have your interview with Ellen coming up when we’re in Los Angeles, and we’re going to continue to release positive statements, monitor social media use and drive home the message that you care about things other than the party-hard lifestyle. It’ll be a strenuous couple of months, but I have it all lined up with the concert schedule.”
“Thank you,” Raven said, her dark eyes filling with a direct look of sincerity. “I really do appreciate what you’re doing.”
While Raven’s words had calmed Chris to some extent, the intensity of Raven’s eye contact made her heart speed up again.
“You’re welcome,” Chris said. “Thanks for giving me a shot—”
She was about to finish her thought, when Raven leaned in, maintaining eye contact. Inches from Chris’s lips, she stopped, causing Chris’s heart to pound even more. At the last moment, Raven offered a smile and leaned the rest of the way in to wrap Chris up in a warm embrace.
With her body pressed tightly up against Raven’s, Chris could smell her hair, could feel the way their bodies fit together. She felt herself tense, but returned the hug, enjoying the feeling of being so close.
“This is nice,” Raven murmured into Chris’s neck.
“It is,” Chris agreed before reluctantly pulling back to stop the embrace. She glanced to the window and saw the curtain swing quickly back over it. Message received. Tanya was not happy. “Does your dealer know she’s just your dealer?” she asked, turning back to face Raven.
“Yes. She does, but she’s a little crazy,” Raven said, looking back to the bus. “Truth be told, she’s just jealous because you’re hot.”
“I’m hot?” Chris asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I know we have mirrors in the bathroom,” Raven said, nonchalantly stomping out her cigarette on the ground. “You have to know just how good you look.”
“Thank you,” Chris said, cocking her head to the side as she replayed the compliment in her head.
“Don’t doubt me,” Raven said. “This is my bus and my party and I said you’re hot. Go with it. Rock it. Go in there and make those other girls jealous. And if you want to make it fun, we’ll play it up a little for them. I’m in the mood to be a little silly tonight, so let’s go have some fun.”
Chris laughed. She hadn’t engaged in jealousy games since junior high and it wasn’t really her style. Regardless, it would prove interesting and fun to mess with Tanya just a bit. “What the hell?” she said, her grin growing. “Let’s do it.”
“All right, ’atta girl,” Raven said, looping her arm in Chris’s as they walked back onto the bus.
She watched as Raven fist-bumped people on her way to the couch in the corner, making small talk as she went, but never removing her arm from Chris’s side. She nodded at Tanya, who glared pointedly at her rival. Raven immediately lost herself in head banging to the beat of the music, letting her long, dark hair flow freely through the air in mesmerizing fashion. Chris stared in awe, wanting to define this woman’s charisma. All eyes were glued to Raven, the revelers seemingly fueled by her energy. Like a skilled conductor, she owned the room, causing everyone to amp up their own tempo and reach her level.
The night progressed with girls providing near striptease dances outside the bus, and shots downed like it was a rave. Even as her head started to spin from the alcohol, she noted the way Raven’s attention to her never faltered. She had to remind herself that it was all an act on Raven’s part, but the sincerity in Raven’s gaze was very convincing.
When Raven took her hand and led her to the dance floor as old-school R & B pumped through the speakers, she couldn’t resist. Wanting nothing more than to get lost in the pure sexuality of dancing with Raven again, she followed eagerly. Raven quickly straddled Chris’s legs and began moving with the beat. Transfixed, Chris watched the display of visual lust in front of her, her body burning as though she had stepped into a bonfire. As much as she wanted to watch the gyration of Raven’s hips, she couldn’t pull herself away from Raven’s face.
She’s on multiple substances, Chris reminded herself silently. Even so, there was a beauty in how easily she moved and how her eyes no longer held even a hint of being drug fucked. Still, Chris was cautious. Raven was gasoline. No good would come of lighting a match.
She took a few steadying breaths, attempting to move to the beat, but there was no denying how distracted she felt, or just how hard she was fighting to keep her composure. Her body pounded from the electricity in Raven’s every touch, every grind against her thigh. When Raven winked and moved in close to brush the hair from her dance partner’s neck, Chris thought she might explode.
“Are you having fun yet?” Raven’s sultry whisper cascaded against Chris’s ears and made her knees weaken. Her entire body tensed with desire as Raven, less than an inch from Chris’s skin, trailed her lips all the way down to the base of her neck. She ran her full lips gently over Chris’s neck, causing Chris to gasp in pleasure. “I’ll take that as a yes,” Raven whispered again, pressing the length of her body against Chris’s and continuing to move to the music.
She pulled back without warning, leaving Chris wanting more. When she gazed deep into Raven’s dark eyes, Chris could see clarity, full awareness of the situation shining in their depths. In one fluid movement, Raven brushed the hair out of Chris’s eyes and leaned in for the softest kiss Chris had ever experienced. When their lips met, Chris felt her own breath catch, just as she felt Raven’s small gasp. Raven’s full lips engulfed her own, setting a fire across every part of her. As their tongues danced, she knew there was no turning back. Lost in desire, she
threw her arms around Raven’s neck, pulling her closer and not caring who saw—or if anyone else was even there. Nothing more mattered aside from the feel of soft lips against hers.
There was a loud, low whistle in the background, but Chris ignored it, wrapped up in what was happening between the two of them. Intertwining her fingers in Raven’s hair, she could feel the passion mounting within her, culminating in wetness between her thighs.
“I think everyone is calling it a night,” Pete’s voice called. “We’ll leave you two alone.”
Chris moved back reluctantly, but suddenly all too aware of how many sets of eyes were on them. Near the door, a woman was trying to push her husband out the door, but he stood staring, slack-jawed and completely immobile. Tanya sat stoically on the couch without averting her gaze.
Raven cleared her throat and offered a huge smile to everyone. “I think we’re all going to call it a night,” she said, walking over to the bar and grabbing her drink to raise it into the air. “Thank you all for hanging out and for making New Mexico one of my favorite stops. We’ll see you all again soon.”
With that, she took a big sip, set her drink back on the bar and grabbed Chris’s hand. Chris smiled as she was led out of the main room. Without questioning motives or intentions, without caring what would happen next, she knew she had reached a point of no longer caring. She needed sex. She needed it badly and she had never felt so strongly aroused by anyone. Whatever may come, she was going to fuck Raven.