Secrets of the Prairie

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Secrets of the Prairie Page 7

by Joyce Carroll


  “How was training today?” He yelled from the couch.

  “It was great. Exhausting, but great. The new coach really knows his stuff.” I looked into the sink of day-old dishes. I tried to brush off my annoyance.

  “Oh, it’s a guy? That’s unexpected.” Elliot wasn’t the jealous type which I had always loved about him, but for some reason today I wished that he was.

  “Guys dance, too, Elly. It’s not that uncommon.” He didn’t reply. I peeked out of the kitchen to see him contemplating his next line. I smiled then; I had adored the scrunched-up face he made when he was concentrating. I pushed Luis out of my mind as I expertly stirred vegetable stir fry.

  ***

  It was finally the weekend, and I ached as I opened my eyes. Something felt off. Trying to shake it, I leaned over Elliot’s peacefully sleeping face and kissed his cheek. He stirred without opening his eyes, and kissed my nose.

  “I’ll go make us some coffee.”

  I rolled out of bed, holding back the groan rising in my throat. The rest of the week’s training had been arduous, and took a toll on every inch of my body. As I hit “start” on the coffee grinder, my mind wandered to earlier in the week, when Luis and I had been practicing my salsa. I had tried so desperately to not ogle the way his hips moved. In Latin-style dance, there is something called “Cuban motion,” and it requires the use of the hips to generate the correct movement. His hips moved flawlessly and erotically. At some point during our time together, he had adopted a habit of running his thumb across my hand while he held it. I’d assumed it wasn’t intentional; he was so very difficult to read, and it made me self-conscious.

  Suddenly, I realized what my strange feeling was when I woke up. I stopped pouring the coffee as I struggled to recollect the dream I had. It was about Luis. I bit my lip unconsciously as I resumed fixing our coffee, and raced back into the bedroom.

  Elliot had fallen back asleep. I sighed and placed his cup on the nightstand beside him, and paused. His face was angelic. He always had such an innocent, boyishly handsome look, and it didn’t betray his gentle nature. Except when he drank too heavily. That’s when most of our fighting happened; I resented the way he never seemed interested in talking about our issues when I did. Or ever, for that matter.

  He stirred again and opened his eyes to see me staring at him absently.

  “Hey, baby. You made coffee. You’re the sweetest.” He groggily gravitated towards the coffee cup and didn’t seem to notice the distant look on my face. He was never very good at noticing these things.

  “What do you want to do today, El? Did you still want to take the canoe out to that river we found the other day? I could make mini sandwiches and tea the same way that I did when we hiked the Adirondacks?” Despite my mood, the idea of another one of our adventures delighted me.

  “Yes, honey, after I finish that piece.” I looked over at the clock. It was already noon.

  “Don’t you want to get there before the sun goes down? It’s going to be really hard to find in the dark.” I frowned.

  “Yes, but I really need to finish this before tomorrow, if we want to have any time for our anniversary dinner tomorrow.”

  “I thought this was going to be part of our anniversary weekend. Don’t you think it deserves more than one day of celebration? I mean, we already missed the actual day.”

  “Yeah, because you had to go into work early, Jen.” He started to get defensive.

  “Because that’s my job, Elliot. Unlike you, I have to be there at a strict time or Nancy will have my ass.” I unknowingly had begun to raise my voice in annoyance.

  “This is my job though, Jenny. I thought you understood that.”

  “I do understand that. But if you spent less time trashing ideas that you half-assed and trying to create new ones halfway through your deadline, you’d have more time!” I stopped. I wasn’t an angry person, I hated yelling. I breathed.

  “You don’t understand what it’s like to be creative, Jenny. You have a set of rules that you have to follow and that’s it, no more thinking involved after that.” He realized how offended I now was, and held his hands up. I turned away from him.

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that, Jen.” I huffed in response.

  He stood up and put his palms on my shoulders, resting his head between my shoulder blades. I didn’t react.

  “I wouldn’t want to deal with Nancy’s face if you had said no, either.” I unsuccessfully fought off laughter at this, and gave in as we both exchanged Nancy impersonations.

  “I love you,” I said, still chuckling a little.

  “I love you too, Jen.”

  ***

  I went into work on Monday feeling refreshed, my adventurous weekend with Elliot having taken my mind off of the stress at the studio. We had reconciled that night with a long, romantic romp in the sheets, and a movie marathon that followed.

  I was putting my hair into a bun when Luis strolled in, looking preoccupied.

  “Good morning, Luis.” I said cheerfully. He looked up, seeming worried.

  “Heads up, Jenny. Nancy is stressed out, so she’s a little testy today.”

  “What else is new?” I laughed. He looked surprised, and smiled. I cursed my heart as it reacted by speeding up its beat.

  “Well well, have you lost the fear?” his tailored vest clung to his slender form, and I had to concentrate on his words.

  “No, I think I just got a good night sleep for once!”

  “You worked hard last week, you deserve it.” He stopped and stared at me for a moment. I felt my cheeks get warm.

  “What?” I said, shyly.

  “Do you wear blush?”

  “Not really, I don’t wear much outside of eye makeup, why?”

  “Huh. I guess you have naturally rosy cheeks.” I must’ve looked embarrassed, because he followed up with: “it goes well with your fair skin.”

  I was elated for a moment, and before I could stop myself, I blurted out “you too.”

  He began to laugh, a little too loudly. Nancy opened her office door and strutted out.

  “Jenny, I need you to start your confirmation calls.” The expression on her face was unreadable. My smile faded and I nodded.

  “Oh, of course, Nancy, sorry, I was just putting my hair up.” She looked at me for a moment longer and then walked back into her office. I looked at Luis briefly, and we both held back amused laughter.

  I sat down at the computer and begin my task. Luis followed, reaching out from behind me to take a pen from the cup in front of me. His voice was low and soft now.

  “Jenny, what are you doing tonight?” I thought of Elliot engrossed in his comics.

  “Nothing that I know of. Why?” I held my breath.

  “You mentioned last week that you’ve been wanting to learn piano. If it’s not too inappropriate, I thought that I could show you a few things.” I paused for a moment. It was true, I had wanted to learn piano for some time, but could never afford a good teacher. I struggled with myself for a moment. It’s just piano lessons. It’s not like he invited you out for a romantic dinner. He patiently waited for my response.

  “I could do that.” I strained to keep control of my voice. “I mean, I would really appreciate that.” He smiled and began to write on a piece of paper. “Here’s my address. Stop by if you’re up for it.”

  I gave him a controlled smile and folded the piece of paper into my pocket. I turned without looking at him again and began my calls. I tried not to think too much about it for the rest of the day.

  ***

  I unlocked my front door, wondering whether Elliot would be okay with my plans. I walked through the house and called his name.

  “In here,” I heard his voice echo from his office. I slowly walked in to see him bent over his desk, furiously shading a piece of work.

  “Hey, El. How’s the new piece coming?” I didn’t take my coat off. He didn’t look up from his work.

  “It’s going. I can’t decide i
f I like this idea or not.”

  “Well at least sketch it out a little before you decide.” I shifted my weight and he looked up, his glasses moved halfway down his nose.

  “Are you going somewhere?” I hadn’t decided whether or not this would upset him. My mind raced.

  “Uh yeah, Denise called and wants to get together.” I lied. “Did you want to come?” I knew his answer before I asked. He turned his eyes back on his drawing.

  “Nah, I’ve have to keep working at this, babe. Will you be okay by yourself?”

  “Yeah, I’ll be fine, I shouldn’t be out too late.” I tried to disguise the shakiness of my voice.

  “Alright hun, have fun. Tell her that I said hi.”

  “I will.” My heart sank a little. If he had been paying attention, he would have known something was up. I was a terrible liar. I walked over and kissed him on the cheek before changing into a blue summer dress.

  When I got into my car, I plugged the address from the paper into my GPS. After a moment of deliberating, I touched up my lipstick and mascara. It’s just piano lessons, I told myself over and over again.

  Twenty minutes later, I pulled into the driveway, and shut my car off. Sitting in the silence for a moment, I tried to determine how I felt, but couldn’t make sense of it. I breathed in and got out, walking hesitantly towards his front door. Tasteful stained glass decorated the storm door, and when I opened it, complimented the oak-colored main door. I knocked gently. After just a few seconds, I heard a click, and the door swung open. I’d never seen Luis out of his normal professional-grade suits and vests, so seeing him now, in nothing more than a v-neck t-shirt and jeans, made my heart flutter.

  “You look...different.” I said, without thinking. “N-not that you look bad, I've just never seen you without a suit or anything.”

  “And your dress matches your eyes.” He stepped aside to invite me in. I tried to look graceful as I walked past him. His house was modestly elegant, with the normal messiness that comes with living alone. I heard the door close, and he walked past me and motioned for me to follow.

  “Do you want tea or anything?” I almost declined, but felt the sudden fatigue of my emotional roller coaster on the drive over.

  “I’d love tea. Black, please.” I saw that he wasn’t wearing shoes, so I quietly took off my heels and set them by the door. When I followed him into the kitchen, I saw an array of cooking utensils and vegetables on the counter.

  “Do you live alone?” I asked searchingly.

  He looked back and saw me eyeing his collection.

  “Yes, I just like to cook. There’s nothing better than food you’ve made yourself.”

  “Yeah, I think so. I love cooking, it’s soothing.”

  “What kind of tea would you like?” He opened a cupboard to reveal at least fifteen different types of loose tea. I marveled at it.

  “I’ll try what you’re having,” I said, motioning to the half-full cup in front of him.

  “Earl Grey it is.”

  He handed me the tea a few minutes later, and we made our way into the den, where a beautiful maple grand piano stood.

  “Wow! That is a beautiful piano.” I took in a gulp of air and tried to hide my admiration.

  He glided over to it and sat down, setting his tea on the small table beside the piano. He patted the spot on the bench next to him, and I hustled over to join him. I blew on my tea while I peered at him over my cup. He opened the piano smoothly, and gliding his fingers over the keys. He played around with the keys, switching between short little melodies effortlessly.

  “So, is there anything you’re not good at?”

  He stopped playing for a minute to drink his tea. After a few sips, he nodded his head.

  “I’m actually really bad at poker, I can’t keep a straight face to save my life.” I looked at him indignantly.

  “So, tell me. What is Jenny Hunter good at?” He looked back at the piano and played slowly as I thought about it.

  “Besides cooking, I dabble in writing.”

  “Ah, that explains a few things.” I saw a smirk forming from over his shoulder. I puffed my cheeks again.

  “What is that supposed to mean?”

  He looked at me and puffed his cheeks out mockingly.

  “Make that cute face all you want, but I meant no harm. I mean that explains why you’re so interestingly insightful.”

  His smile didn’t waver as he said this. My cheeks were burning so much now that I was shocked my face didn’t catch fire.

  “Interesting?” He turned to look at me then, resting his hand on the space between us.

  “You know what I’m talking about, Jenny.” He was very close to my face now. I could smell the tea on his breath and I realized that I, too, had begun to lean in. We stared at each other for a moment, and I shyly looked down. I felt his hand on my face then; it was delightfully soft and I didn’t resist as he pulled my face into his. His lips felt like the softest pillows caressing mine, and I let out a little sound as his hand made its way through my long hair. I sunk in, unable to think of anything else under the influence of his embrace. I kissed back firmly, momentarily blocking out the protests in my head. But then they became louder and I backed up a few inches.

  “Luis, I can’t…I…”

  “I won’t tell Nancy if you don’t,” he said patiently, letting me keep my distance.

  “It’s not that.” I looked down, unable to look him in the face.

  “Oh.” Understanding dawned on his face. “I see. Well, he’s a lucky guy.” He was silent for a moment.

  “Anyways, let’s start with scales.”

  “Huh?” I looked up, having completely forgotten about the massive piano in front of me. He gestured towards the keys.

  “Oh. Oh! Right, uh...whatever you think is best.”

  ***

  A few hours later, I glanced at my watch.

  “Oh, shit, it’s a little past two in the morning.” He checked his watch too, raising his eyebrows.

  “You’re right, I didn’t even notice the time passing by.” I stood up abruptly, accidentally hitting my knee on the piano. I sat back down and cursed lowly, holding my knee with my hands.

  “Sorry about that, I keep forgetting to put padding there. Everyone does that.” He placed his warm hand on my knee, and it sent shivers down my spine. I tried to control my legs from shaking as I stood up again, carefully.

  “I should get home if I'm going to get up in time to beat Nancy to the studio.” He nodded and closed the piano. I handed him my tea cup awkwardly and ambled over to the door as he left to put it in the kitchen. He had caught up to me by the time I slipped my shoes back on. I turned and looked at him. He looked so lonely to me then. He gazed at me longingly, and I found myself gravitating towards him again.

  “I’ve got to go, thank you for teaching me so much,” I whispered, now inches from his face.

  “Anytime.” His breath made my knees grew weak, and I turned away and opened the door, walking out quietly.

  “See you tomorrow, Jenny.” He closed the door.

  ***

  I opened my front door a half an hour later, and took off my shoes soundlessly before making my way to the bedroom. I crept through the door; Elliot was asleep. I silently took my clothes off, and held them to my face for a moment. Somehow, his scent had rubbed off on them, and I wondered if he had also been nervous while sitting so close to me. I dropped the clothes into the hamper and rubbed my eyes as I walked towards the bed. I lifted the covers gingerly, and Elliot stirred as I crawled in next to him. He rolled over, half-awake.

  “Hey, babe. What time is it?”

  “It’s almost three. Sorry I took so long…” I trailed off, unable to spit out the lie.

  “That’s okay, did you have fun?”

  I touched his face. “Yeah, I did.” He lifted his arm and I cuddled up against him. It took me two more hours to fall asleep as I stifled my sobs.

  ***

  I stood in the main
ballroom and looked into the tall, stretched mirror. I had worn makeup, but I still looked tired. I stopped into the bathroom and patted my face with water. Luis arrived as I walked back onto the floor, and I greeted him with the best forced smile I could muster.

  “Hello, Luis. How are you today?”

  “I’m well, thank you. How are you, Jenny?” He looked exhausted.

  “I’m fine. Did Nancy say anything about what we’re doing today?”

  “Yes, she asked me to go over the foxtrot with you for a little while, and then I’ll be helping some of the students for the rest of the day.”

 

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