This is my first book and I had a few problems that I didn't see right away when I wrote it. One of the problems I had was character development. After reading some of the reviews I realize the readers really want more backstory and I think in my other two books in the series that I definitely did give the readers more of what they wanted. I want to go back and revisit Fire in His Eyes and give the readers more of Monica and Victor's back story. It really bothered me that some of the reviewers didn't like Victor’s character. They felt that he was too selfish, abrupt, and that he walked all over Monica. I definitely didn't want to give that impression of him. He has his reasons for doing that. His own past his left him emotionally scarred and we don't get to see what those scars are until the end and maybe if I had revealed those earlier on in the book, or provided more insight into his personality and character, the readers would've liked him more. And some of the reviewers didn't like the way Monica was so willing to continue her relationship with Victor. Many reviewers were critical of her because I didn’t reveal her backstory earlier on in the book. I would have liked to have gone more into the psychological effects of the rape on her. I think that would have made the readers more understanding of why she continued to want to be a part of Victor’s life. One other issue with the book is typos and grammar errors. It was my first book and editing is quite expensive for the indie author. It's not cheap to publish a book and I had to spend $800 of my own money for publishing and to use the song lyrics that I used in the book was another added expense. Editing was also another factor, and a big expense, I thought my editor did a great job but readers still caught more. I was much more careful in the other two books in the series, and my editor, who I continue to use does a fantastic job.
Chapter 2
Afraid to Love
by MJ Nightingale
Synopsis: Learning to trust again is the hardest thing to do.
Ana Perrot is crazy. Crazy about sex, and pleasing her lovers. She is passionate and as fiery as her red hair. She eats men like air. She is also willing to submit to any man anywhere. But outside of the bedroom, Ana is an independent woman who lives her own life by her own rules. And, her biggest rule…she won’t do long term relationships. She refuses to fall in love …again.
Teddy O’Rourke is an easy going, laid back Tampa bartender at one of the most popular clubs in town. All about family and enjoying life including all the women that throw themselves at his feet, he has no problems finding willing partners. His football player body, his personality, his warm hazel eyes all ooze sex appeal. He is the perfect package in every way for a woman like Ana, well for any woman really. An ex-cop, his instincts tell him Ana is one hell of a woman, but she is wounded and scarred by the past. What are her secrets? What will make her trust him? Why is she so afraid to love?
A one night stand, that is full of surprises for Teddy, opens his eyes to new possibilities. A single man enjoying his freedom meets his match in the bedroom, and elsewhere. He sees a future with Ana, a counselor for troubled youth. But could she be persuaded to fall…and to trust again?
Questions:
1.) Ana Perrot has secrets that affect her choices. What are those secrets and how did they affect her choices?
2.) Why do you think Ana is submissive in the bedroom, but so opposite in her everyday life? Do you think her past has affected her choices in the bedroom?
3.) How do you think Ana's relationship with her dad affects her? Do you think she likes being called a chip off the old block?
4.) Ana's home is a wild Florida home. How does her home reflect her personality?
5.) Teddy works as a bartender. Why does Teddy feel so fulfilled in his current job despite what he used to do?
6.) Why does Teddy not let Ana push him away? Why does he fall in love with her when he could have anyone?
7.) Teddy has a unique backstory. What is it? Why does this make him perfect for
Ana?
8.) Why won't Ana give in to Teddy and allow him into her life permanently right away?
9.) How does Louisa, Ana's friend help her? Why is Lou a good friend?
10.) Brenda, Teddy's mom, is a fantastic mother. How does her letter to Ana reveal how good she is and how does that letter finally make Ana make the choice to give Teddy a real relationship?
Questions with Answers:
1.) Ana Perrot has secrets that affect her choices. What are those secrets how did they affect her choices?
Ana’s big secret is that her husband gave her an STD and this disease made her infertile at the age of 24 years old. She wasn't able to have children. In fact she had to have a complete hysterectomy. As a woman this is something very hard to deal with emotionally and psychologically. She felt like she wasn't a woman. Ana wanted to have a family, to have children. But because she can't have children, she keeps herself from having a real relationship. She keeps men at arm’s length. She doesn't want to have an emotional connection to them because she believes that she can't give a man a home and a family. It is because of these things that she won't get involved. She chooses to only have sexual encounters with men or relationships that won’t last. Both my sister and I faced struggles with infertility so this story line came to me naturally. My husband and I were eventually able to conceive with the help of the medical community. My sister, tragically, experienced the incident I used in Afraid to Love.
2.) Why do you think Ana is submissive in the bedroom, but so opposite in her everyday life? Do you think her past has affected her choices in the bedroom?
She chooses to be submissive in the bedroom and this is definitely not a personality trait that is shown in her everyday life. She's a professional woman, a strong woman that vocalizes her wants and desires. Her submissive behavior, however, is due to the fact that her husband strayed in the first place. Because her ex-husband cheated on her and told her things like she never satisfied she becomes submissive the bedroom. She wants to please the men in her life because she thinks subconsciously that she didn't please her husband and that's why strayed. Even though she is a strong character, below the surface there are those doubts and insecurities that exist like every woman.
3.) How do you think Ana's relationship with her dad affects her? Do you think she likes being called a chip off the old block?
Ana’s father cheated on her mother and in Ana's mind he's much like her ex-husband. Because of what happened to her and what happened to her mother Ana distrusts men, but she's also a very sexual being. Her father is too. She doesn't really want to have this trait in common with him. Because he cheated on her mom, and she was aware of it, there was a loss of trust in him. And then it happened to her, and her husband cheated on her. But now that she's older and enjoys having sexual relations ships, and the fact that her father doesn't know all of what happened to her, and he thinks that she is just like him, but she is not. Ana is an extremely loyal person. This can be seen in her dedication to her job, her defense and protectiveness of her sister Monica, and her friendship with Louisa. Ana's relationship with her father now is very strained. They don't talk, share, or communicate very well.
4.) Ana's home is a wild Florida home. How does her home reflect her personality?
Ana purchased a house that reflects her personality. It's an old Florida style home up on stilts above the ground. She lives near the ocean and surrounded by Florida wildlife. The flora, the fauna, the trees, the Spanish moss that grows are all symbolic of Ana's untamed wild natural self. The old decaying oak tree in her backyard is also symbolic of her. Her house is described as Rustic with a few modern features, and that describes Ana too. She's definitely a modern woman but she does have those qualities, old-fashioned qualities that make her the woman that Teddy wants to spend the rest of his life with.
5.) Teddy works as a bartender. Why does Teddy feel so fulfilled in his current job despite what he used to do?
Teddy works as a bartender, but he used to be a New York police officer. Being 34 years old and a bartender may not seem like th
e greatest job in the world, but for Teddy it is. Teddy was in New York City during 9/11. He saw horrors no 21-year-old rookie police officer could ever imagine. He worked for months afterwards during the cleanup of the city as well. He saw people's pain, suffering, and discovered bodies under the debris; and it left its mark on him. He also lost his partner in that horrible disaster. Working in the bar, serving drinks to mostly happy people is what Teddy needed to cope and get through a very rough time in his life.
6.) Why does Teddy not let Ana push him away? Why does he fall in love with her when he could have anyone?
Even though Ana keeps Teddy at a distance, he won't let her push him away. He sees something in her that is different from the other women dated and he sees a future with her almost from the very beginning. Once the reader is made aware of Teddy’s backstory and what Teddy has been through they know that he is not the type of man that gives up easily. His mother wouldn't let him give up even if he wanted to.
7.) Teddy has a unique backstory. What is it? Why does this make him perfect for Ana?
Teddy is an ex New York City police officer. He's also been adopted by an interracial couple who have six other children and all but one are adopted. They are quite an unusual family. Because Teddy's parents could only have the one child, they felt a bit incomplete and always dreamed of having a large family. Both of them came from small families of their own. When their oldest son's friend’s parents died, they take him in and the sister. These are in their first two adopted children, two Latino children from their neighborhood. Then the other five arrived in various manners. They have another black child that they adopted when his parents were killed when he was just an infant. His parents were killed in a house fire and there were no relatives to take in the child. And they are also raising a niece, Brenda's sisters only daughter. The last two children adopted are Teddy and Amanda, twins. Teddy's mother was a drug addict who lost custody of the children. His sister Amanda has cerebral palsy and this made them very hard to adopt together. Because social services knew the O’Rourke family, they were approached to adopt Teddy and Amanda, which they did and then their family was complete. It is because of Teddy’s backstory, being adopted, that he is perfect for Ana. She is a woman who can't have children, who hasn't accepted and realized that families do not have to come together in the traditional sense. On a side note, the inclusion of Amanda, Teddy’s twin sister, is based on my twin boys. One of my sons has cerebral palsy. He suffered a stroke at two weeks old, and it is my greatest hope that he finds his own happily ever after some way the character of Amanda does.
8.) Why won't Ana give in to Teddy and allow him into her life permanently right away?
Even after she finds out the Teddy is adopted and comes from such an unusual family she doesn't immediately jumped into the relationship with her whole heart and that's because she's been living with this pain and belief that she isn't good enough for a very long time. So it takes her awhile to realize that this relationship could work, and that families come in all shapes sizes colors and manners.
9.) How does Louisa, Ana's friend help her? Why is Lou a good friend?
Louisa Sears is Ana's lifelong friend from Maine. She moves to Florida after Ana and Teddy have been seeing each other for several months. She knows Ana, she knows her history, she knows what she's been through, and Louisa knows that Ana is a stubborn person who doesn't often take advice well. But Louisa is also the type of friend that isn’t going to just tell you what you want to hear. This is the type of friend that Ana needs. When Ana refuses to listen, we see Lou is not afraid to get involved and take action.
10.) Brenda, Teddy's mom, is a fantastic mother. How does her letter to Ana reveal how good she is and how does that letter finally make Ana make the choice to give Teddy a real relationship?
Brenda's letter to Ana shows what a fantastic mother she is. Even though she isn't Teddy birthmother she shows Ana that the love a mother has for a child knows no bounds. The bond Brenda has with each of her children shows that biology isn't the only way to create that parent-child bond. The letter reveals that the bond is created by the time you spend with your family, the caring, the upbringing, the traditions you create, the fears and the hopes and dreams that you have for your children will make a difference no matter how they came to you. The letter finally makes Ana see the light. She was worried that Teddy would want a child of his own blood. The letter shows her that it's not genetics make a family, but love, unconditional love.
Chapter 3
Afraid to Hope
by MJ Nightingale
Synopsis: Louisa Sears is ready to start over. Escaping her small town where prejudice, long memories, and old fashioned values haunt her, Louisa embarks on her dream of finding love, and a man who can warm up her bed at night. Pregnant at sixteen, divorced from an abusive husband at twenty, and raising a daughter alone, Louisa is now ready to live. She wants what every woman wants. A rock hard man, who knows how to love. Will Florida be the place where her dreams come true?
Jay Russell is battle scarred. A past filled with horrors from childhood, the war in Iraq, and the most devastating event of his life that occurred when he returned home, he is definitely not looking for love. When he first meets Louisa Sears, the bombshell with the fantastic body, he wants one thing, and one thing only, her body underneath him. The hot little ticket that walks by his t-shirt shop, meets all his requirements for a night of passion.
The scars in them run deep though, and they both have secrets. Can two people so deeply wounded by the past learn to trust each other enough to share those secrets? And if they do, will they be able to get past them and learn to hope again?
Questions:
1.) Louisa Denise Sears struggled with men and finding love in her little hometown. Why was that so? Do you think small towns are really like this?
2.) Why does Lou get on the bike with a practical stranger? What makes her make that choice?
3.) Why do you think Jay makes the choice to try a permanent relationship after so long avoiding it? Why do you think Jay chooses to try a relationship with the Lou? Do you think her age has anything to do with his decision?
4.) Jay has PTSD. Many events and traumas happened to him in his life that could have caused or triggered it. Why was it the event with Madeline and Brontë that triggered his PTSD, and not the others?
5.) What makes Jay's father so adamant about not giving Lou the explanations she wants? Was this the right choice? Why or why not?
6.) Lou's initial fear of Jay after his first episode/anxiety attack occurs in her presence causes her terror even though she's had experience with PTSD before. She doubts that it is PTSD. Why is that? What makes her fear Jay is like Robert despite her common sense and experience with PTSD?
7.) Even after Jay and Louisa reunite, Jay holds back on fully committing to Louisa. Why does he do this? What causes his reluctance?
8.) Louisa's choice in a house reflects her personality like in my other books. How does her home symbolize her?
9.) Why were some of the minor characters in this book important to the development of the story? Dr. Phil, Pete, Monica and Victor?
10.) In the epilogue, Jay's proposal to Louisa is planned, but seems to come at the perfect time? Why is that so?
Questions with Answers:
1.) Louisa Denise Sears struggled with men and finding love in her little hometown. Why was that so? Do you think small towns are really like this?
Louisa had a hard time finding someone in her hometown because she was labeled by her small town as someone who was “easy” because she had a child at a young age. Some towns are like this, many I think. Times are changing, but small towns, do have long memories and it is hard to change people’s viewpoints. Even though Louisa proved to be very responsible, the people in her town and the men, especially, never forgot.
2.) Why does Lou get on the bike with a practical stranger? What makes her make that choice?
Lou moved to find something exciting i
n her life. She wasn’t about to let this opportunity with Jay, a man she had been fantasizing about for months, and dreaming about for years, slip through her fingers. She makes this choice because she has been careful for so long, and has denied herself so long the pleasures that comes with meeting a very exciting man. Too her, even though he is a stranger, the electricity, chemistry is just too hard to resist.
3.) Why do you think Jay makes the choice to try a permanent relationship after so long avoiding it? Why do you think Jay chooses to try a relationship with the Lou? Do you think her age has anything to do with his decision?
Like Lou, Jay is ready to move on, or thinks so at least. He wants to try. He feels extreme guilt in his wife and child’s death, and so has not allowed himself to find someone new because he feels that would be like betraying them and the love Madeleine had for him. I think he picks Lou, first of all because of the attraction he has to her, but also because she is not the kind of woman he usually hooks up with. He is looking for a relationship, and perhaps because she is a bit older than he is he finds her maturity refreshing, and yet she also has innocent qualities as well. Children, having them, terrifies Jay. Again, for him it is a guilt thing. Choosing her, a woman who is older, feels safer. In his mind, he may assume she will not want children at her age. Although, I was thirty-five when I began to try for my own first child, I think men believe that older woman will not want them like woman in their twenties looking to start families of their own.
The Ultimate Romance-Erotica Book Club Guide Page 2