PETIT-BON-DIEU: You’re going to get the hiccups.
(Suddenly, Captain Barrachon returns from the lower decks at the head of some guards and sailors.)
LE KANAK: We’re done for!
(The convicts remain glued to the spot.)
BARRACHON: (to Gueule-de-Bois) What’s that you’ve got there? Rum?
(Gueule-de-Bois is struck dumb.)
BARRACHON: Booze in the hands of convicts. It’s unimaginable! (to Pascaud) Find out what happened at once! If a guard is at fault, punish him severely!
(Pascaud leaves just as Lieutenant de Vilène enters, looking very upset.)
DE VILENE: Captain!
BARRACHON: What?
(De Vilène pulls Barrachon aside.)
DE VILENE: No. 3216 has escaped!
BARRACHON: Chéri-Bibi!
DE VILENE: Yes, Captain Chéri-Bibi is no longer in his cell.
BARRACHON: (staggering) That’s impossible. (to the guards) Lock up all the convicts immediately! And put a guard in front of every cage.
GUEULE-DE-BOIS: (to Petit-Bon-Dieu) Looks like something’s going on.
(The guards quickly push the convicts through the doors to the cages and leave with them.)
BARRACHON: What about the two guards that were guarding him? What happened to them?
DE VILENE: They’re dead. The relief guard was just found strangled behind the cell door. The irons are still locked. But Chéri-Bibi is gone. He’s vanished.
BARRACHON: (panicked) We must search the ship!
DE VILENE: Yes, but we must conceal his escape. The convicts are plotting something, I’m sure of it, and Chéri-Bibi’s disappearance might trigger a full-blown revolt. Also, the personnel on board are terrified of Chéri-Bibi. If they find out he’s escaped...
BARRACHON: You’re right.
(Pascaud returns, looking frightened.)
PASCAUD: Captain! Have you heard?...
BARRACHON: Yes, Pascaud. Chéri-Bibi has escaped.
PASCAUD: Not only Chéri-Bibi, Captain, but also the Countess, who was in a neighboring cell.. She’s escaped as well.
(Barrachon and de Vilène are both stunned.)
BARRACHON/DE VILENE: The Countess, too!
PASCAUD: Yes, Captain. Her cell is empty.
BARRACHON: Listen, Pascaud, you know I do trust you, but is it possible that, perhaps, you turned a blind eye...?
PASCAUD: No, Captain! I haven’t left the deck. My men can tell you. Also, I couldn’t spring Chéri-Bibi, even if I wanted to, because I don’t have the key to his chains. And do you think I could have murdered two of my fellow guards?
DE VILENE: The Captain isn’t accusing you, Pascaud. He’s searching for answers. No one knows where Chéri-Bibi is.
PASCAUD: He’s got to be on board somewhere. But what’s even scarier is that the others in their cages suspect something. They were waiting for something like this to happen. My word.
DE VILENE: The fact is, they’ve been up to something for the last two days.
BARRACHON: Above all, we must keep our heads. What do you recommend, Lieutenant?
DE VILENE: First of all, Pascaud is going to spread the rumor that Chéri-Bibi’s dead. Then, if you agree, Captain, we should search the ship from top to bottom. We cannot not find them, and when we do, we’ll make them run the gauntlet.
BARRACHON: I approve. (to Pascaud) Execute the Lieutenant’s order, Pascaud.
(Pascaud leaves after having given a military salute.)
BARRACHON: Between the two of us, Lieutenant, I still believe that there must be some accomplice on board. Nothing else can explain Chéri-Bibi’s escape.
DE VILENE: I agree, Captain, but not among the guards. I’m thinking of the women being transported... Did you notice how beautiful the Kanak’s mistress, the one they call the Countess, is?...
BARRACHON: I see. You think that she might have seduced one of the sailors...
(La Ficelle enters from the lower deck, running crazily.)
LA FICELLE: I saw him! I saw him!
(He bumps into the Captain.)
BARRACHON: What is it, man?
LA FICELLE: Help! Help! Chéri-Bibi’s on the loose! Chéri-Bibi’s escaped!
DE VILENE: (trying to stop him) Shut up! Will you shut up!
(But La Ficelle gets loose and runs away screaming.)
LA FICELLE: Chéri-Bibi’s escaped! Chéri-Bibi’s escaped!
DE VILENE: The news has already spread!
BARRACHON: It’s unimaginable! We’re confronted to a painful mystery.
DE VILENE: Trust me, Captain. We must search the ship at once and catch Chéri-Bibi. The sooner the better.
BARRACHON: Right away. Let me issue some new instructions to the night officer, because it’s going to be night soon.
(Indeed, night starts to fall. They head toward the stairway and, as they reach the first steps, a sister of charity enters furtively from the lower decks, casting uneasy glances left and right. She does not see the Captain and the Lieutenant, who are hidden by the ladder, but they see her plainly.)
DE VILENE: (to Barrachon) That’s Sister Mary of the Angels. Why has she left the Infirmary? Look, Captain! It’s almost as if she’s trying to make sure she’s alone on the deck.
BARRACHON: Indeed. What strange behavior.
(She bends forward to drop something taken from inside her large sleeves.)
DE VILENE: (low, to Barrachon) Look, she’s slipping a letter between the slats in the deck.
BARRACHON: I will clear this up at once (calling her) Sister!
(He rapidly descends the ladder followed by the Lieutenant. The Sister utters a little scream of surprise and swiftly picks up the letter.)
SISTER MARY: (stammering) What do you want, Captain?
BARRACHON: I want that letter that you just picked up.
SISTER MARY: I didn’t–I didn’t pick up anything, Captain. I don’t know– what you mean...
BARRACHON: Excuse me, Sister, but I hate to hear you commit such a lie. If you don’t give me that letter on the spot–a letter the mysterious nature of which clearly warrants my attention –I will call another Sister and have it taken from you by force.
SISTER MARY: (emotional) I don’t want to–I can’t....
DE VILENE: Are you secretly communicating in this way with the convicts? But why?
BARRACHON: (in a slightly softened voice) I know what I owe to your character, to the mission you are given down here. But, Sister Mary, understand plainly that there are things which I can’t allow. Disobedience mustn’t hide behind the mask of charity.
DE VILENE: Sister, why are you being so stubborn?
BARRACHON: You force me to believe that there may be more to this than mere Christian zeal. After all, you’ve just lied to us! You must have some serious motives for it! Give me that letter!
SISTER MARY: I don’t have it! Please, Captain! I beg you to believe me.
(She falls at the feet of the Captain.)
BARRACHON: But don’t you understand that your attitude makes us imagine the worst? We’ve been trying to find out how the convicts were able to communicate from cage to cage, from group to group, and form a mysterious conspiracy, the nature of which we ignore. But it presents a threat to us. And now, we discover that it’s you who are informing them, and it’s you who are informing them! It’s you who are their instrument! Oh, God, I do want to believe you, Sister, but for me to do so, I must see that letter.
(He abruptly grasps her hands and snatches the letter away. She utters a scream and remains annihilated, hands folded in prayer.)
BARRACHON: (rapidly unfolding the letter and perusing it rapidly) “Chéri-Bibi is not dead.” Now, this is rather strange! What can Chéri-Bibi have to do with her?
(Suddenly, we hear the sound of metal being pried loose.)
DE VILENE: Listen, Captain! It sounds as if someone’s trying to force open the gates of his cage. (pulling his revolver) We should do something!
BARRACHON: Not yet, Lieuten
ant. There’s still time. Instead, let’s continue to observe. I think we’re going to witness the solution to our little mystery.
(The Captain and the Lieutenant climb the ladder. Sister Mary remains on the deck, on her knees, praying. We hear, then see, the shutters on Gueule-de-Bois’ cage open–the convict having successfully pried the bolt loose with a very thin metal blade. He now slips furtively onto the deck.)
GUEULE-DE-BOIS: Decidedly, I haven’t lost my touch with locks. I still have it! (noticing Sister Mary on her knees) Sister Mary of the Angels!
SISTER MARY: (rising) Go away! Go away!
(De Vilène fires a shot in the air.)
DE VILENE: (shouting) Alert! Alert!
GUEULE-DE-BOIS: Great Scott!
(Guards surge from the lower deck. Captain Barrachon, followed buy the Lieutenant, leap down from the ladder.)
BARRACHON: Search this man right away!
DE VILENE: And grab his arms! Quickly!
(But Gueule-de-Bois knocks two of the guards down, then grabs another by the throat, while taking a piece of paper from his pocket and swallowing it.)
DE VILENE: He’s swallowing a piece of paper!
BARRACHON: (to the Lieutenant) Shoot him!
(The Lieutenant fires his revolver at Gueule-de-Bois just as Sister Mary of the Angels, who has been watching this struggle with anguish, rushes between them. She is the one catching the bullet.)
ALL: Ah!
(Sister Mary collapses onto the deck. Gueule-de-Bois Throat is finally overpowered and dragged away by the guards. De Vilène bends down to examine the Nun’s wound.)
DE VILENE: She’s wounded in the shoulder.
BARRACHON: (to one guard) Go fetch the doctor at once! (to another) Take the Sister back to her cabin and post a guard at her door. (to de Vilène) Lieutenant, I want you to remain at her bedside. The first words she says, as she wakes up, might doubtlessly be precious to us, understood?
DE VILENE: Perfectly, Captain!
(He gestures to several sailors to carry Sister Mary who is still in unconscious and leaves with them. In the meantime, night has fallen and it is now dark.)
BARRACHON: (striding nervously) First, Chéri-Bibi and the Countess escape. Then, I find that Sister Mary is somehow involved in all this– yet another new mystery, even more obscure.
(A trumpet is heard. The Captain heads towards the ladder leading to the bridge when he bumps into a man dressed in a simple sailor’s pea-jacket–it is Chéri-Bibi!)
CHÉRI-BIBI: (advancing, hand outstretched) How’s it going, Captain?
BARRACHON: (recoiling) Who goes there?
CHÉRI-BIBI: Don’t you recognize me? (pulling off his pea jacket and beret, revealing his convict uniform, with his number: 3216) It’s I, Chéri-Bibi.
BARRACHON: (terrified) Chéri-Bibi!
(The Captain prepares to shout, but Chéri-Bibi points a gun at him.)
CHÉRI-BIBI: Don’t! Be very quiet! Not one shout! Not one gesture! (pointing to a coil of ropes) Please be seated. (insisting) I beg you.
BARRACHON: Bandit!
CHÉRI-BIBI: No tough talk now, my dear Barrachon. I’ve been wanting to have a little chat with you for a long time.
BARRACHON: Take care! I won’t always be at your mercy.
CHÉRI-BIBI: Let’s not speak of the future. (forcing him to sit) Sit down, my dear Captain, and let’s talk. I am an honest man, Barrachon.
BARRACHON: Let me laugh!
CHÉRI-BIBI: You don’t believe me? I was expecting it! Fatality! If only you knew what I’ve had to endure in life! It isn’t to be believed! I will tell you, first of all, that I’m not even angry with my judges over their mistake, because it’s human to be deceived. And yet, Captain, the man who is speaking to you right now, and who is inscribed in the register of convicts as No. 3216, is innocent!
BARRACHON: You’re not going to tell me that, a few years ago, you did not commit...
CHÉRI-BIBI: Exactly eight years ago.
BARRACHON: ...that double murder near Dieppe, for which you were condemned to forced labor in perpetuity?
CHÉRI-BIBI: I am innocent of those crimes, but that’s not what I wanted to discuss with you.
(A patrol of sailors enters from the lower decks.)
BARRACHON: A patrol.
(Chéri-Bibi quickly puts on his pea jacket and sailor cap.)
CHÉRI-BIBI: Not a word, my dear Captain. You wouldn’t want to force me to commit my first crime.
(Barrachon remains still. The patrol crosses the deck, climbs the ladder and disappears.)
CHÉRI-BIBI: Excuse me, Captain, for the liberty I am taking in retaining you for a few moments, but I have something to tell you. Returning to Cayenne enrages me! When I escaped from there the first time, I swore never to set foot in that place again. You understand me? If you don’t, then we’re in for a tricky time.
BARRACHON: I’m not afraid of you.
CHÉRI-BIBI: There are more than 800 men here who will obey me at a glance. You’re not strong. They’ll make a snack of you.
BARRACHON: And the weapons?
CHÉRI-BIBI: We have them; we will have them. The men are waiting only for a sign from me to take over your ship! It would have been done already if I hadn’t noticed a nun’s head dress.
BARRACHON: Sister Mary of the Angels!
(He starts to stand up.)
CHÉRI-BIBI: Ah! Don’t jump around like that, my dear Captain. You might cause my revolver to go off just by itself. (making him sit down again) Here’s my offer: I promise never again to bother my fellow citizens. We’re not far from the coast of Africa. Put a slop at sea and let me go. That’s all I’m asking! If that suits you, say so. You won’t have Chéri-Bibi to fear any more. Not you, not anyone else. And with me gone, your ship will be safe. Why? Because without me, the other convicts are impotent. But if you refuse, beware! I’m not angry, but when attacked, I will defend myself.
(Barrachon remains silent.)
CHÉRI-BIBI: Well, do you have something to say? Is it yes? Is it no?
BARRACHON: (firmly) No!
CHÉRI-BIBI: Then so much the worse for you! Fatality!
BARRACHON: We’ll see about that!
(Barrachon rushes at Chéri-Bibi, who rapidly gains the upper hand and floors the Captain.)
CHÉRI-BIBI: I’m not going to kill you, because I hate pointless crimes, but I swear to you that I will drop you off on the African coast, naked as a savage, to punish you for not having granted my last request! Good-bye for now, Captain!
(Chéri-Bibi kicks the Captain away and escapes into the lower deck. After a couple of minutes, we hear rumbling coming from the interior of the ship, followed by several rifle shots.)
BARRACHON: (getting up) Help! To arms!
(More shots. Then, De Vilène returns, rushing onto the deck.)
DE VILENE: The convicts are revolting!
BARRACHON: (enraged) Chéri-Bibi was here just now!
DE VILENE: (shouting) Alert!
(Guards and sailors emerge from the lower decks and surround the Lieutenant and the Captain.)
BARRACHON: How is Sister Mary?
DE VILENE: She came to. I discovered that she is Chéri-Bibi’s sister.
BARRACHON: (shocked) His sister!
DE VILENE: She just confessed it to me. She thinks she’s lost. Evidently, she spoke the truth.
(Heavy firing begins. Pascaud enters, followed by some guards.)
PASCAUD: Captain, we’ve lost control of the battery above, the one below and the third deck. Thirty of my men have already fallen. All the cages are open and nothing seems to stop these bandits.
BARRACHON: Sound the rally! All able-bodied men to the bridge!
PASCAUD: (to a bugler) Sound the muster!
(The bugler pipes. In reply, we hear a loud shout: “Long live Chéri-Bibi!” A sailor enters, running from the lower decks; he has a large gash on his face.)
SAILOR: They’re attacking!
(He collapses onto the deck. Suddenly, Si
ster Mary of the Angels enters. Her wound is such she can barely stand on her legs.)
DE VILENE: Sister Mary?
BARRACHON: Please withdraw, Sister!
Cheri-Bibi: The Stage Play Page 4