“Sounds like a plan, Baby. I’ll be there in a couple of hours. Any word on Sophie this morning?”
“No, not yet. There probably won’t be, either. I get the feeling the less she sees of me, the better.”
“God, that whole thing was so weird,” I agreed with him.
“I’ll say. What a nightmare.” He pulled a shirt on just as I was rinsing my hair. “I’m gonna go get some coffee. Come out when you’re done so I can say goodbye.”
“Will do!” I called back.
I hurried through the rest of the shower and dressed quickly. I decided against blow drying since I was just going to get it wet again at the pool with Singh. I padded down the hall and stopped at Mills’ room to check on her. She was lying on the bed and looked pale.
“Are you going to live, baby girl?” I asked, sitting on the edge of her bed.
“Oh, God, I think so. How are you and your loud sex buddy?”
I laughed and covered my mouth with my hands. “Oh, my goodness! You heard us?”
“Yeah, but I’ve heard worse.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Well, first of all, I lived in a dorm room. Secondly, Dad and Charlotte used to spend most of their weekends together at the house, holed up in Dad’s room, if ya know what I’m sayin’.”
I wrinkled my nose.
Mills ignored my face and continued. “Dad is so ridiculously loud. I used to have to walk around wearing headphones to block it out. But, I guess I don’t have to worry about that anymore.” Her voice was soft and sad.
“What do you mean? Did they break up?”
Mills nodded.
“What? Why?” I was shocked by the news. I’d been so wrapped up in my own world with the adoption news and everything with Gabe and Sea Lab. I hadn’t felt very connected to Doug since he gave me the news, and I guess in some ways, I had detached a little bit since moving out.
“Well, she didn’t like the way he handled the situation with you. She thinks he should have told you about the adoption a long time ago. And she told him—yes, I’m an eavesdropper—she told him he and Mom needed to quit using you as a pawn between them. She told him she thinks he must still love Evangeline.”
“Well, that’s just ridiculous. She’s unlovable,” I scoffed.
“Why else would he refuse to stand up to her? I mean, I kind of get what she’s saying.”
I didn’t have an answer. Doug and Evangeline’s relationship was complicated at best, hostile at worst. I usually stayed out of it and hoped eventually it would become a non-issue.
“I don’t know. But I’m sad that Charlotte broke it off. I know she made Dad really happy. Maybe I should see if I could have lunch with her or something.”
Mills stopped me. “No, Pepper. Don’t interfere. Things are complicated enough right now, don’t you think? If it’s meant to be, it will work out. Just like you and Gabe and me and Fallon!” She smiled but turned green again. “Uh oh, I have to go. Talk to you later.” She ran back to the bathroom and I could hear her dry heaves through the wall.
Poor girl. I hoped this violent sickness wasn’t going to last much longer.
I got some coffee, made a piece of dry toast and took it back to the bedroom. I dug through my clothing bags as I nibbled on the toast, looking for something to wear to work. In the end, I settled on shorts and a Sea Lab shirt. My little fib to Gabe wasn’t actually a bad idea. It would be nice to pick up something fun and nautical-themed from Jack Rogers, but I wouldn’t have much time. Maybe tomorrow I could stop by.
I Googled the yoga instructor’s address and plugged the info into my phone’s GPS. I felt bad leaving Mills hugging the toilet, but I knew this was the best chance I had to get Evangeline alone, and hopefully stop the madness.
It was an easy drive, really, to the beachside yoga resort. There were teakwood walkways and an interesting Asian garden on the way to the yoga yard. I opened the gate and surveyed my surroundings. I found my ex-mother easily. She looked ridiculous in a bright yellow, spandex suit with leggings and a cropped top. She did have the decency to wear spandex bottoms, too. Her hair was piled up on top of her head in a wild ponytail. She looked like someone right out of a 1980s Jane Fonda workout tape.
The instructor, a slim, bird-like woman, had her hand on Evangeline’s hip, correcting her form slightly. As Evangeline turned into the next pose, she spotted me and tumbled right out of her pose, landing in an undignified splat on her pink mat.
“What are you doing here? What do you want?” she snarled at me.
“Oh, Mom. Not happy to see me? I can’t imagine why. It’s just your adopted kid, Pepper Anderson. Well, maybe not Anderson but let’s not get into that just yet. I actually came by to see you, MOM.” I said the “Mom” word as loudly as I could.
The instructor murmured an excuse and left us alone in the yard.
“I guess you know, MOM, that you will be a GRANDMA soon! That’s right! GRANDMA, or G-MA or maybe GRANDMOTHER! Now that’s not from your adopted kid, MOM. That’s from your real child. She’s made you a GRANDMA! Isn’t that great?”
Evangeline sneered at me. “Stop it, Pepper. You’re embarrassing yourself.”
I looked around the deserted yard. “No, I’m not. You’re the only one embarrassed by our family. I’m proud of who I am, even if I don’t have all the pieces. I’ve learned that I’m strong, independent, and that not only do I have the capacity to love, but I’m actually lovable. That’s right, I’m in love. Someone loves me. Well, actually, a lot of people do.”
“What is your point?” she snapped at me. “Why don’t you call your therapist or something? I’m sure they’ll be much more interested in your breakthrough.”
“God. Why are you such a monster?” I threw my hands up. “This isn’t about me. I’m mad as hell, but I’ll be okay. I know who I am now. This is about Mills and your future grandbaby. You need to get it together. Not for me, but for them. You can’t pull this psycho shit with them!”
“Don’t you dare tell me what I can and cannot do, Pepper. I’m a grown woman.” She stooped over and started to roll up her mat.
I grabbed her arm to stop her. She flung her arm back as though I’d burned her. “Then you need to act like it. Otherwise, I’m going to take matters into my own hands. I’ll call Oprah myself to set up my own interview. She wants a story? She’ll get the whole story, the real story. My story. Then the whole word will see who you are.”
She froze and said in a low voice. “You hate me that much? You want to destroy me?”
“No, I don’t hate you. I feel sorry for you. There is a huge difference. I just refuse to allow you to have any more control of my life. It ends here. It ends now. That’s it, Evangeline. I’ll never call you Mom again. I will never call you, period. This is over!” I turned and left her staring after me as I walked back to my car.
I pulled out onto the freeway and headed towards Sea Lab. I was still shaking from the conversation with Evangeline. I’d meant every word. If she stepped one more French-manicured toe out of line, I’d be on the phone with Oprah’s production team so fast it would make her head spin. I started rehearsing my side of the story, imagining myself out on that stage, spilling my guts to the world.
I didn’t want to do it, but fighting fire with fire was sometimes the only way to go.
To clear my head, I decided to do a little shopping after all. I wanted to get to work and see Gabe and Singh, but not feeling the way I was. It would be too hard to focus, and if I’d learned anything, it was that working at Sea Lab required all my attention.
It took me longer than I expected and I ended up shopped for over two hours. By the time I left, my car was loaded down with bags full of cute new shorts, tops, totes—and, of course, a few pair of shoes. I’d also bought a bunch of stuff for Mills and my future nephew. She needed a pick-me-up after being so sick. I decided to take everything back to Gabe’s place and then change for work so I could wear one of my new outfits. Something Gabe would lo
ve seeing me in.
“Mills? Mills? Are you here?” I wandered around and didn’t find her right way. “Mills? Are you lost?” I laughed until I saw her lying on the couch, her face swollen and red from crying. “Sis? What’s going on?”
“She tried to kill herself, Pepper. Dad is on the way to the hospital.”
“Who? Charlotte? Sophie? Who?” I felt the desperation rising.
“Evangeline. She overdosed on sleeping pills this morning. They’ve got her at the hospital now, pumping her stomach. Oh, my God, Pepper. I did this! She heard about the baby online and now she’s so depressed that she, she tried to…oh, my God!” She cried and sat up, putting her arms around my neck but I barely felt her. I was numb. Completely numb.
Mills was sobbing, her entire body shaking with the force of her tears. “Shh, shh. Sweetie, it’s okay.”
No matter what I said, I couldn’t change Mills’ mind. She was convinced it had been her that had driven Evangeline to the edge when I knew perfectly well it was me. I had done this. I’d challenged her and threatened her.
Now she was dead, or almost dead.
I couldn’t help it. I cried too. That’s where Gabe found us when he came back home. Mills was sick and in no shape to visit the hospital and I didn’t have the courage to go. What if she saw me and tried to kill herself again? I couldn’t have her attempted suicide on my hands twice in one night. I realized that deep down, I did love her—even if she could never love me the way I wanted her to. I must have broken her heart. Broken it into a million pieces.
Now what? What could I do now except wait and see what would happen next. For the first time in a long time, I prayed and hoped somebody up there could hear me.
“I’m sorry, Mother. I’m so sorry.” I kept saying it over and over again. What would happen to us now? I didn’t know, but I was more grateful than ever that Gabe was here with me, ready to walk through the wreckage beside me.
Once we got Mills calm and asleep, I pulled him to the bedroom and sat on the bed. I poured out my heart and told him what I’d done.
“I just wanted her to hurt like I hurt. Now I know that it worked, but I had no idea she was so broken—that she’d respond like this. Her overdose isn’t just for dramatic flair. She was that hurt. I hurt her that bad. I’m such a bitch, Gabe.”
“No way. I’ve seen you at your worst and your best. You might be a strong woman and have some strong opinions, but you are not a bitch. She never let you see her weakness. She never let you know how much she cared. This is just something that happens in families, sometimes. All we can do is wait. But you gotta stop blaming yourself, Pepper. You’ve been blaming yourself for everything, all your life. Now, it’s time to set it free. Set her free. Love her no matter what, because now you know. Now you can see she’s emotionally frail, just like Sophie. Sometimes, the signs aren’t there on the surface—you have to look a little deeper. It’s okay, I’m here. It’s going to be okay.”
Someone knocked on the door. Gabe went to check it out and it was Fallon, looking for Mills and Gabe led him to her, resting in her room. I was glad he’d shown up for her. It was a good sign for their relationship. She needed him now.
Gabe was right. Everything he said was true, but I still couldn’t shake the feeling hanging over me. I prayed again that she’d recover completely. If not—well, I’d have to find some way to deal with it.
At dinnertime, no one was really hungry, but we all sat on the couch watching the news and waiting for Dad to call. Each time the phone rang, I thought it was him but mostly it was well-wishers and friends who wanted me to know they were praying for her speedy recovery.
This was going to be a long day. Sooner or later, I’d have to go to the hospital and sit face-to-face with her. I wondered if she’d accuse me or cry when she saw me. I wasn’t sure, but I knew I had to see her before… before anything happened.
Now the tables were turned. I needed her to forgive me.
— Continued in —
Destiny Undone 5
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Acknowledgements
I’d like to thank my lovely readers again for your support. Y’all rock! Without you, there would be no reason for me to keep writing these books. You’re all wonderful and I so appreciate you from the bottom of my heart.
I also want to thank my incredible Facebook fans, newsletter subscribers, beta readers and advance copy reviewers. I so appreciate all your help in making this story a success.
I also want to thank my PA, Chris. Without her taking care of things, I’d never get much writing done and also big thanks to my editor, Cindy and cover designer, Barb who somehow make my words and ideas sparkle.
About the Author
Amanda Heartley is a writer of sinfully sexy romance books. She was born and raised in Oklahoma and subsequently transplanted into the hustle and bustle of life in Southern California. She's a country girl at heart with an insatiable weakness for sexy men and feisty women. Her first erotic series was published in July 2013.
At home, she plays Mom, chef, ninja, taxi, and nurse hanging out with her four wonderful children and three loveable mutts.
You can find her drinking a green smoothie, relaxing in the back yard, writing another steamy story.
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Copyright
This book is a work of fiction. The names, characters, places and incidents are products of the writer’s imagination or have been used fictitiously and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, actual events, locales or organizations is entirely coincidental.
© 2015 Amanda Heartley
Published By: Heartley Publishing
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the copyright owner.
The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of the trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
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