I looked at the long white envelope in my hand. It was windowed and had my name on what looked like a check. “What’s this, Anna?”
“Your paycheck for the last six months. I wish it were more, but it’s all I could get out of the Board. And don’t you dare try to give it back,” Anna replied. I had to stifle a smile because that’s exactly what I was thinking of doing.
“Fine,” I said, folding the envelope and sticking it in the back pocket of my well-worn jeans. I felt grubby next to Anna with her neat as a pin hair style and pressed powder blue pants-suit, and the doctor in his chinos and polo shirt. “I’ll talk with you later,” I said to Anna, and turned to acknowledge her guest with a nod. “Doctor.” I made to leave, feeling very awkward.
“Allexa, wait!”
I turned back to face Anna, eyebrows raised in question.
“I was hoping you would give us some help here. We need to find the doctor someplace to stay temporarily, then a place to live, and some suitable office space. You’re the problem solver, what would you suggest?” Anna asked.
“Well,” I said, leaning against the door jamb, still feeling unkempt even though my baggy shirt was one of my best, “there’s no shortage of motel rooms. For temporary housing, I’d suggest the Inn since it has dining facilities. The green house just across the road, Anna, is it still vacant?” She nodded. “It would take some work. The upstairs is a private residence, and that lower level could be converted to an office for the doctor, and it’s centrally located.” I turned to the handsome man sitting by Anna’s desk. “It would be comfortable, just not luxurious, as long as you don’t mind living and working in the same space.”
Anna knew all this, and probably had thought of it herself, which made me wonder why she was asking me.
“It’s what I would expect, and it would be more convenient for attending any patients, day or night,” he agreed. “How long would it take to get it ready?”
I looked back at Anna. “I can have Jason stop over later and look at the place and give an estimate. He will want to meet with Dr. Robbins to know what he has in mind.” I had absolutely no idea where we would come up with the equipment that would be needed to furnish a functioning medical office, however that wasn’t my problem. “I’ll talk to him when I get home.”
“Is this Jason your husband?” the doctor asked.
I smiled. “No, I’m not married. Jason is my son.”
“Allexa, why don’t you take the doctor over to the Inn, show him where it is and give him a quick tour of the town while you’re at it?” She smiled innocently. I had the feeling she was playing match-maker. How did I politely tell her – and him – I wasn’t interested?
* * *
“Perhaps we should start with the house, Dr. Robbins,” I offered, as we walked to the parking lot. “It’s just across the street here, and you might want to see it before you start thinking about repairs or remodeling.”
“Mark.”
“Excuse me?”
“Please, call me Mark.” He flashed a toothy white smile at me.
“Fine, Mark it is. I’m sure the few things needing attention on the residential level aren’t anything Jason can’t handle. I’d guess maybe a week, you’ll have to talk to him about his schedule,” I commented as we made the quick tour of the house. “It sure does need a good cleaning though,” I added.
“Anyone you could recommend for that?” Mark asked politely.
“Let me ask around,” I replied, though I knew my daughter-in-law Amanda was very good at cleaning and she needed the work.
The office area, which was at street level and a definite attraction for a doctor’s office, would need a great deal of remodeling. I needed to ask Anna who was going to pay for all of this.
* * *
I had Dr. Robbins park his car, that same gray compact, at the Inn, and climb on the ATV with me, instantly feeling it to be a mistake. I could feel his warm breath on the back of my neck and the nearness of his very male body. The four block tour took less than ten minutes, even stopping to point out places of interest: the post office, the ball field, the school, two churches and a bar. Moose Creek was four blocks square and didn’t have a traffic light, just four stop signs that most ignored. The main road, County Road 695, ended there. The joke in town was if you were there, it was either intentional or you were lost. There was no driving through; you had to turn around and go back to go anywhere else. This one way in had served us well when dealing with the gang of prisoners we called The Wheelers, named so from the four wheelers they rode in on.
After our short tour, I got Dr. Robbins checked into the Inn, and told him we would be in touch when Jason needed to talk with him.
“Allex, please stay and have dinner with me,” Mark asked, smiling warmly, showing an obvious personal interest. I really hate being called Allex. “It’s been a long time since I’ve met a beautiful and intelligent woman. I’d like to know you better.”
“That’s very flattering, Mark, however I must decline,” I said politely. “And the name is Allexa.” I retreated quickly before I would have to explain that I was still suffering from a badly broken heart and that only one person could get away with calling me Allex and it wasn’t him. How did I tell a very attractive man he didn’t interest me? That I felt numb inside? Easy, I didn’t. I ran.
* * *
Since I was already in town, and to save gas, I drove the short distance over to the Dam Road to talk to Jason about the renovation of the new doctor’s house. I hugged my grandson Jacob and he went back to his room to play.
Jason was enthused about getting some carpentry work. Work of any sort was still hard to come by. “A doctor in town? That’s awesome, Mom!”
“Amanda,” I said to Jason’s wife, “how would you like a job cleaning? I know you’re a marvelous housekeeper, and I think you would be perfect for getting that place ready for the doctor to move in. He might even hire you for an on-going position.”
“Oh, Mom, that would be great, thank you,” Amanda instantly replied. “I’m sure the doctor would like to move in as soon as possible. Can you meet with him tomorrow about the details?”
“Sure. From what you’ve said, the living quarters might not take much, just some upgrading, if I can find the supplies.”
* * *
It was a beautiful night; the temperature was in the low 60’s, there was only a slight warm breeze, a perfect night for sitting outside - before the mosquitoes wake up. The full moon rose in the darkened sky. Not the white shiny orb of winter, a dull yellow tinged with orange, as though there was something high in the upper atmosphere filtering the reflection. I watched as some random dark wisps of clouds made their way across the face in a jagged dance, to eventually obscure the moon itself into a smudge of light hanging low in the night.
May 3
Regular chores still needed to be done. I found that out a long time ago while living deep in the woods. Unlike in the woods, here I had even more to do: chickens needed tending, the garden would need attention once it was planted, all the yard work, stacking wood, laundry and housework fell on me alone, once again. I’d done it all by myself before, I know I could do it again. Right now, laundry was waiting.
After I sorted out the clothes, I started with the heavy stuff first, since it would take the longest to dry on the clotheslines outside. I checked pockets as each thing went in the machine. That’s when I found that envelope from Anna. I had completely forgotten about it. I added soap and turned the water on, thankful for the convenience of on demand power to pump the well.
I poured myself a fresh cup of coffee, opened the envelope, and almost choked on that first sip! The township had deemed my past services as the Emergency Manager for Moose Creek were worthy of $1,000 per month! After the usual taxes, I was looking at a check of almost five thousand dollars. I was stunned. My mind started racing on what I could use that money for. First would be resupplying all the food and supplies I had used over the winter; or maybe a small sola
r array, or even a greenhouse. This was going to take some careful planning. I started a list, my thoughts whirling with possibilities.
* * *
At noon, Jason, Amanda and I met Dr. Robbins at the house he was to occupy. Jason had turned on the power and the water first, so there was electricity and he could test the plumbing. Amanda had thought to bring cleaners, disinfectants, mop and bucket, vacuum cleaner and dust rags, and while Jason and the doctor went room to room discussing what needed fixing or replacing, she started cleaning in the living room. With only that room, a small kitchen, bathroom and two bedrooms, it wouldn’t take her long. I excused myself, and went across the street to talk to Anna.
“So how did last night go?” Anna asked with a grin, tapping her manicured fingers together. I looked at her confused. “With the good doctor? I could tell right off that he’s interested in you!” She leaned back in her brown leather chair, expecting some juicy gossip.
“We toured the house across the street, and then I gave him a tour of town, which you know takes all of ten minutes. I made sure he was checked in to the Inn, and then, Anna,” I leaned on her desk with both hands, “I refused his dinner invitation and went home.” She froze. “Please, do not try match making. Let it go.”
“I’m sorry. I thought maybe after John left you might …” she let that trail off.
“Business, Madam Supervisor,” I retreated to hold up the door jamb with my shoulder. “Who is paying for the repairs and remodeling of the doctor’s new residence?” Back on formal footing, she stiffened some.
“The township is leasing the house to Dr. Robbins for $1. He’s responsible for all the work at making the office functional beyond structural. We’ll pick up the tab for any repairs to the residence. Repairs, not esthetic replacement. Anything beyond repairs is on his tab.” Her quick answer confirmed my suspicion that she had already selected that place for the new doctor and pulling me into the situation was an unwelcomed bit of strategy.
“That sounds reasonable,” I responded. Satisfied, I went back across the road, fairly certain Anna would leave my personal life alone now.
* * *
I took the sandwich I made for dinner to the TV room, and flipped on the news. I couldn’t believe half of the political diatribe that was spouted, while other events needed no glossing over, like the frequency of severe tremors along fault lines. I turned on the computer and logged into the National Earthquake site. The minor movements rarely made the news, however, the swarms could be a red flag of something bigger coming. I had my settings to show all activity, no matter how slight. Most of what I read centered out west, away from the New Madrid. I breathed a sigh of relief and finished my sandwich.
CHAPTER 3
May 4
I added a quart of gas to the rototiller and made a couple more passes to the garden, churning up the soil, releasing a heady earthy scent, then walked it back into the barn and shut it off. The chickens would scratch around in the freshly turned soil and even out some of the ruts, the rest I would rake.
Part of last fall’s preps was getting new fencing and more posts. It had been covered with a tarp and stored under the cistern until needed, which was now. I knew I needed to redo the chickens’ yard and buying the material early would save me money on the price increase. Little did I know at the time that there would be a horrendous increase in price, and a definite lack of availability. I thanked my stars that I did what I did back then. I believed in having whatever was needed before it was needed. I had preached that on my internet groups, and lived by my words. If I hadn’t, I would not be able to do the necessary fencing now.
By creating a second enclosed yard, I would be able to seed one and close it off while the chickens were confined to the first one. Once there was adequate grass growing, I would switch the gates, and plant the first yard, then continue with that method all summer. Keeping them fed was going to take some ingenuity. No more running to the feed store. We might have power restored, and gas in our tanks, but things were definitely not back to normal, and they may never be.
I had just taken down all the old fencing when I saw the pale green car cruise slowly down the road. I didn’t think much more about it. Not until I felt that stirring, that feeling of someone being near. I straighten up, squaring my shoulders, my heart thudding hard in my chest.
“I can feel when you come near me, you know. I don't have to see you to know you're there," I said as I turned slowly. John was standing just outside the garden at the entrance gate.
The emotions that surged through my body almost caused me to sway: the joy, happiness, sadness, anger and relief, all conflicting, all hitting me at once. I could not have stayed where I was if I wanted to. I was drawn to him like that proverbial moth to the flame and I offered no resistance. I opened the gate and stepped out, closing it behind me.
“You left me,” I stated simply.
“I’m back.”
“Are you so sure I’ll take you back?”
“No.”
The admission startled me.
“Where have you been?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
What an odd conversation this was.
“I’ve missed you,” my voice broke on the words. I remained steady, almost defiant.
“I couldn’t stay away any longer,” John confessed, and reached out for me. I slid comfortably into his arms. We stood there, just holding each other, for the longest time. Then I let go and backed away.
“I’m still angry at you.”
“You should be. I’m mad at me too. Can we talk?” John asked. I don’t think I ever saw him so unsure in the two years I’d known him.
“Have a seat at the picnic table. I’ll get us some iced tea,” I said. I took my time getting our drinks. I found a tray, set the glasses filled with ice cubes, added the sugar bowl, wondering if he took his cold tea as sweet-tea like many southerners do, then I placed a small pitcher filled with golden herbal tea in the center.
* * *
The wooden picnic table that nestled between the tall maple trees was my birthday present from Jason last year and was well shaded with the newly sprouting leaves. The sun was streaming through and dappled the pine boards with splashes of muted green. I intentionally set the tray to the side as I didn’t want anything obstructing my view of John. I could see he had put a little weight back on, and his face was less pale, like he had been spending some time in the sun. He looked wonderful to me. I silently poured some tea into each glass and set one glass in front of myself, allowing him to take his own. I took a tentative sip, mostly to quench my too dry throat. There was a time when the ensuing silence would have been companionable. Now it was awkward, with each of us waiting for the other to say something.
John set a ring of car keys on the table between us. “These are for you.”
“What do you mean?” I asked, only glancing at the keys.
“I bought you a new car. Well it’s not new-new, but the newest one I could get. Automotive manufacturing has shut down.” He pointed over his shoulder to the minty green SUV. “And before you say anything, I know you need a new car and that you haven’t gotten one because of all the money you sank into your preps. Preps that kept not only you and your family alive this past winter, but me too. This is my way of saying thank you, Allex.”
“We’ll discuss this later,” I said, leaving the keys untouched. “Talk to me, John. Why did you leave like you did? It was such a shock.” All the pain of watching him walk away came rushing back, bruising my still broken heart.
He ran his hands from his forehead back across his bald head, a gesture that was undoubtedly unconscious and that was also so him. I stifled my sob by taking another sip of tea.
“I knew if I didn’t just leave, I wouldn’t be able to, and I had to go back. There were things I needed to do and get.” He rolled the cold glass between his hands and set it back down again. “See, Green Way pays me very well and I wanted to buy you this car,” he waved his hand toward t
he driveway. “There are so many things I’d like to give you and I can’t without working.” There was a plea in his voice.
“I told you before you don’t have to pay me back anything! I don’t want the car, I don’t want anything.” Just you, I added silently. “It’s been six weeks since you left. Where have you been? Why haven’t you at least called?” I really wasn’t sure I was ready for his answers.
“When I got back to the house on Eagle Beach, most of the guys were already there, acting like not much had happened. Steve was cooking breakfasts, Sandy was cooking dinners, and the routine was so easy to fall into. I was different.” He paused, finally taking a drink of his tea, no sugar. I’ll remember that.
“I don’t think you ever met Simon, our liaison to the Green Way home office. He noticed the change in me, and when he found out I had spent those four harsh months here in Moose Creek, and with you, he immediately sent me home to my daughter’s for a two week rotation. I don’t know if he thought that it would help get you ‘out of my system’ or what, but it didn’t. If anything, going back to my daughter’s, seeing my mom and sister, it just made me miss you all the more.” He started to reach across the table; instead, he stopped and picked up his glass again. I could understand needing to keep the hands busy; I really wanted to touch him too.
“I made up my mind then that I would work the mine, for as much money as I could make, only if I can have you, too…” he hesitated. “That is, if you’ll have me back, Allex. If you don’t want me back, I’ll ask for a transfer someplace far from here.” His eyes told of the sadness he felt at the prospect of leaving here.
The Journal: Ash Fall Page 2