by Jayne Blue
Harper
* * *
He was broad and strong and held me so close. Two hours. That’s all I had. Then I’d have to collect Wyatt and tell him a lie he wouldn’t understand.
“Do you want me to tell you where I’m headed or is it better if you don’t know?” I finally said, pulling myself away from Nash’s arms.
“We can work out the details later. This time isn’t like the last time. I’m not sending you off alone.”
I smiled and touched his cheek. “But you are sending me away.”
He turned his head into my palm and kissed me there. Electric fire shot through me. “I won’t risk you and I won’t make false promises. You asked me if this is going to get worse and I think it will. The mayor is willing to let this city fall to get what he wants. I have an idea what that is and it’s as bad as it gets.”
I nodded. “I heard D’Angelo and his son talking a little bit. They were careful, but I know enough to know. You think the mayor is behind the shop fire and Dre’s assault too?”
Nash shrugged. “I can’t say directly. But yeah. Yeah.”
A shudder went through me. I saw stone-cold evil in Mayor Dodge’s eyes more than once. The first time, when he called me into his office and tried to leverage me against Nash, I didn’t fully grasp it. Now I did. Now it hurt even worse because it was about to rip me away from the man I loved again.
“Don’t say anything to Wyatt. Not yet. I don’t want to walk into his life and have to walk out again. When the day comes that we tell him who I am, I’ll be damned if he ever has to watch my back as I leave.”
Nash was warm and strong and he folded me in his arms. I wanted to make him give me promises and wishes, but he was right. Wyatt wasn’t the only one who wouldn’t be able to stand watching Nash walk away again. So it would have to be me. I’d be as strong as I needed to be for all of us. I’d protect my son and hold Nash’s kisses in my heart until the next time. God, please let there be a next time.
Then a quiet desperation overtook me. Tomorrow could bring disaster, but right now I was certain of one thing. I needed him. All of him. I went up on my tiptoes and pressed my lips to Nash’s. He brought his arms up and circled them around my wrists. He would have peeled me away from him, I think. Leaving me would tear him apart as much as it did me. But as I parted my lips and sighed against him, a fuse lit inside of him, then burned brighter than the sun.
Nash lifted me and I wrapped my legs around his waist. We tumbled into the living room together. I had things to say to him. Things I needed to say to him. I loved him. I chose him. I didn’t want to be without him. But those things were too dangerous to say now. Nash didn’t have to spell it out. The truth came off him in waves in the way he held me tight, kissed me strong, and lay me on the couch.
He slipped his jacket off his shoulders and pulled his t-shirt over his head. I reached up and traced my fingers along the swirling ink over his biceps. He bore the silhouette of a howling wolf’s head across his shoulder. I sat up, moved around him, and kissed him there. Part of me wanted to curse him for it. The mark he bore is what kept us apart but it’s also what made him who he was.
Nash unfastened his jeans and slipped them off. For a moment, he stood before me naked and magnificent. He stroked himself and smiled down at me. He was everything I wanted and couldn’t have. But I didn’t want to be strong or responsible. I wanted to go back to that time when I could be bold and reckless. He brought that out in me over and over again and made me a slave to him.
I sat up and closed my fingers around his cock. Smiling up at him, I drew him into my mouth and watched as he threw his head back and his nostrils flared. Yes. I would take this man. It might be only for now. It might be never again. But I couldn’t think about that now. We made no promises to each other with our words. Our bodies sealed our oath.
I took Nash hard and deep. He laced his fingers through my hair and brought me down on him, filling me. The world became the sound of my lips around his turgid skin. Heat grew between my legs. I slid off the couch and went down on my knees for him. I broke away only as long as it took me to slip my blouse over my head and unfasten my bra. Then I went back and molded my mouth around him.
“Harper.” He whispered my name again and again. He didn’t have to tell me. I knew I belonged to him. I would always belong to him. Moisture pooled between my legs and I struggled out of my skirt as I kept my mouth fastened on his cock. Then I was naked on my knees before him.
Nash trembled in my mouth and finally pulled himself away. He moved around me; placing his hands on my hips he urged me forward. He slid his fingers between my legs and stroked me there, making me shudder. He teased the sensitive little bud beneath his thumb and opened me for him. I wanted him like this. I wanted him every way I could have him. He took his time, sliding his fingers in and out of me as I trembled and struggled to keep from sinking to the floor. I was open and wet and oh so swollen for him. I could tell him I belonged to him but my body made that clear. He hooked three fingers together and fucked me with them, taking his time to explore the deepest corners of me. I coated him with my juices. Just when he would have brought me to a shuddering climax, he withdrew and sat back on his heels.
“God, I love you like this. You were made for me, baby.”
“Yes!” I gasped. I drew the strength to turn and face him, then sank back down on my back, spreading my legs wide.
“I want to see you,” I said. “I want to hold your eyes when you fuck me, Nash. Oh, God, please, fuck me.”
He smiled and stroked himself again. He was huge and hard and a tiny bead of moisture glistened at the head of his cock. We should be more careful, of course I knew it. But part of me knew just like I had all those years ago, this might be the only part of Nash that could ever stay with me.
“Please!” I begged him. He didn’t make me wait long. Nash plunged his dick inside of me. I arched my back to receive him.
I wanted to tell him the deepest truth I knew. I loved him. I would wait for him. No matter how long it took or how far I had to run. There would never be anyone else for me but him. With each pounding thrust he called my name and I knew he felt the same.
We clung to each other with frantic need. Six years ago, I didn’t know the last time we made love would precede the most heartbreaking separation of my life. This time, I did. I held on for dear life, clinging to him with my arms and legs and my very soul.
When Nash poured himself inside of me, I cried out his name and scored his flesh with my nails. He let out an aching groan and threw his head back. He caught my earlobe between his teeth and nipped me there. We loved. We fucked. We clung to each other with an animalistic passion. I did not want to let him go.
When my own orgasm overtook me, I crashed into him just like the pounding surf on the beach where we first came together. It seemed we’d always be tied to the ocean. Its powerful force drawing us together then ripping us apart with the tide. For now, I held tight and kissed him as Nash whispered my name and spent the last of himself inside me.
Later, he held me against him. We made quite the pair, a tangle of limbs and kisses as we lay on the living room floor in front of my mother’s couch. It hadn’t occurred to me that she might walk in at any moment. I’m not sure I would have cared and the image that conjured made me giggle against Nash’s chest. Then my giggles turned to a choked sob and the magic was broken.
We were awkward with each other for the few moments it took for us to gather our scattered clothing and reassemble ourselves. Finally, when I got my legs beneath me, I walked Nash to the door. Panic rose inside of me as I crashed back down to earth.
“I’m going to send two of the prospects to watch the apartment for a day or two until you can make your arrangements.” He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a money clip. Handing it to me he kissed my forehead.
“I can’t take this,” I said. It was a thick wad of hundred-dollar bills amounting to probably several thousand dollars.
&
nbsp; “It’s just to get you started and settled,” he said. “And it’s not up for debate. I’ll send more.”
I wanted to tell him I loved him. In his eyes, I think he held the same truth. But neither of us were brave enough to say it just then. It would cost too much. I settled for the only thing that really mattered. “Be careful. And come back to me.”
He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. I think if he would have sought my lips we might have ended up on the floor again together. “How about you promise me the exact same thing. Take care of Wyatt. He’s the best of both of us and I plan on getting to know him.”
Nodding, I ran my hands over the soft leather of his cut, drinking in the scent of it. It would have to last me a while. Neither of us would say the other words you’re supposed to say at a time like that. We wouldn’t say goodbye. Nash slid his aviator glasses on, opened the door and peered into the sun. He gave me one last kiss before heading out the door. I closed it behind me and pressed my back against it, sinking to the floor.
I couldn’t fall apart. Not now. Not ever. I picked myself off the floor and went to the bathroom. I had just enough time to take a quick shower and make myself presentable again before walking across the courtyard to retrieve Wyatt from our neighbor’s house. He’d made fast friends with a six-year-old boy named Connor. Though Connor was six months older than Wyatt, the two of them would start in the same kindergarten class. My heart dropped. They would have started in the same class if we were still here in the fall.
I couldn’t think about that now. I’d lose my mind if I did. For now, I’d just tell Wyatt we were going on a road trip with Gam. I had no idea where. The safest bet would be to head back to Michigan and get my old job back for the time being. The thought made me ache with longing, but I’d done harder things before.
I let the hot water sluice over me, hating that it took away Nash’s scent and the last echoes of his touch. I stayed in until the water ran cold and a fierce shiver racked through me. Toweling off, I threw on a fresh pair of jeans and a t-shirt then wound my damp hair into a topknot. I slid into a pair of flip flops and walked down the sidewalk to Christie Derby’s unit. She was a young, single mom just like I was. Her husband Zeke was in the Air Force and deployed to Afghanistan. Christie hated living on base without him so she came here.
I ran my fingers under my eyes and hoped they weren’t still puffy from crying. I didn’t worry about explaining that to Christie, but I didn’t think I could bear Wyatt’s questions just now. Letting out a breath, I knocked on Christie’s door. I heard their Yorkie, Tinkerbell, yapping inside then Christie yelling at her. Then Christie opened the door with a bright, infectious smile. She opened it wider to let me in.
“I hope the boys didn’t tear your place apart too badly. And if they did, I hope you made Wyatt help clean it up.”
Christie laughed. “Are you kidding? They sat and watched videos on their iPads most of the time. I don’t get it. They’d rather watch other people playing video games than actually play themselves.”
I shook my head. “Ugh. Whatever happened to playing tag?”
“Tell me about it.”
“Thanks for having him. Wyatt’s been cooped up with Mom and me most of the week. He’d been looking forward to coming over for two days. He kept asking me how many minutes. We tend to measure the quarter hour in SpongeBob episodes.”
Christie laughed and put her hands on her hips. “Oh good God, anytime, Harper. I mean anytime. Connor is always just as excited. They tired each other out anyway. Connor’s in there taking a nap as we speak. He hasn’t done that in over a year! I got caught up on the laundry even.”
“Wow! Careful, that’s bad joujou. In my house that always means somebody’s about to throw up on their sheets or something.”
Christie laughed. “Did Wyatt forget something?”
I narrowed my eyes at her. “I don’t know. Do you mean to tell me he’s in there sleeping too?”
Christie cocked her head to the side. “What do you mean?”
I looked over Christie’s shoulder. “I mean, I hate to wake the little guy up but I better get Wyatt home.”
Christie’s mouth dropped open. “Harper, what are you talking about? Wyatt left two hours ago.”
Acid seemed to fill my lungs. The room started to spin and I couldn’t draw breath. “Christie?”
“His uncle came and picked him up. Is your mom doing okay? He said you had to take her into the doctor. She fell getting out of the shower.”
I shook my head as heat rushed down to my toes. No. No. No. “I didn’t. Wyatt doesn’t have an uncle. Christie?” I put my hand on the wall to steady myself. My legs had no strength. Christie’s face lost all color. My phone vibrated in my back pocket.
Everything that happened next seemed to go in slow motion. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my phone. A number came up I didn’t recognize. Normally, I wouldn’t have answered it but something in my heart tripped.
“Hello?”
“Mama!” Wyatt’s voice sounded so far away. I bent over, grabbing my thigh with my free hand.
“Baby?”
“Mama, I don’t like it here. I wanna come home.”
“Baby, where are you?” My voice didn’t sound like mine.
“Hello, Harper.” A familiar-sounding man’s voice came on the other end. I straightened and took a staggering step backward. Christie looked nervously behind her as Connor started to wake and call for her.
I shook my head, turned on my heel, and stumbled out of Christie’s house, slamming the door behind me. I stormed down the sidewalk.
“What have you done with my son, you son of a bitch?”
“Listen very carefully. If you ever want to see this kid alive again, you’ll do exactly what I say. Do we understand each other?” Paul McGill said.
The sun seemed to burn so bright it felt like a white-out. I nodded and pressed the phone against my cheek. “I understand.”
Chapter Eighteen
Nash
* * *
When evening came, we were all back at The Den. I paced in front of the bar like a caged fucking tiger. We were nowhere. Paul McGill never showed up at his aunt’s house. He hadn’t called and she herself started to worry. We left Luce and another of the prospects there with her. Aunt Irene wasn’t stupid and she’d been around Ghost long enough to know shit wasn’t right.
I felt like I had control of nothing. Just when things had started to move in the direction I’d always dreamed, the club’s past rose up and threatened to shatter it all. I could still taste Harper on my lips. I’d had to push her away just like all those years ago. Dammit, I’d been a fucking fool to think things could ever change for me.
“You think he’s been tipped off?” Puck asked.
“I don’t know how. But yeah. You sure Irene didn’t slip in a call to warn him while you were there?”
Puck shook his head. “I’m positive. Nash, she doesn’t even know how to use a cell phone and she never used the landline the whole time we were there.”
“Well, I think it’s a pretty safe bet to assume he’s gone to ground because he knows we know something. What about the mayor? We still have eyes on him?”
Floyd nodded. “Yeah. He hasn’t left the mayor’s mansion in hours. I really fucking wish we had somebody on the inside there like we used to when Hansen had the job.”
“I’m through sitting around. So he’s on to us. I see no reason to wait on flipping his place. If there’s even a chance he didn’t manage to get back there after his meeting with the mayor last night, we might be able to find something if we can’t find him.”
King sat at the bar. He slid his phone out of his jacket and made the call. We had prospects sitting on Paul’s house off on the north end of town. No one had seen him come or go from there either. So we’d do this the old-fashioned way. We’d bust the fucking door down.
King told our crew to sit tight and that we’d be there in twenty minutes. At least it wa
s action.
“You think your contact at Emerald Point PD would be willing to do something off book for us?” I asked. King’s eyes narrowed.
“What did you have in mind?”
“Ghost told me Paul had some skills as a hacker on top of everything else. I don’t know what we’ll find, but I wouldn’t mind having somebody there who could take a peek at his computer. I mean, if we’re right and he hasn’t had a chance to set foot in his house since this started to go bad for him.”
“That’s not a half-bad idea,” King said. “Gimme a couple of minutes and I’ll see what I can do.”
I pulled my Nine out of my hip holster and checked the magazine. I sure as shit hoped this wouldn’t end in a body count, but we had to be ready if it did. We’d go in tight. Me, King, Hammy, and hopefully King’s contact. Hammy had been mistrustful and up my ass since Ghost, but I never doubted he’d have my back if it came to a fight. I put a hand on his shoulder. His eyes misted over as he clenched his jaw. Losing Ghost took a toll on him and he was just as eager to put an end to this as I was.
King gave me a thumbs up when he clicked off his phone again. “I got a name of somebody my guy at EPPD trusts. It’s one of his informants. He says this guy is twitchy as shit but a fucking genius with computers. If there’s anything there to search, we should be good to go.”
“Good,” I said. I couldn’t fault the cop for not wanting to get his hands dirty with this himself. It was too risky and no matter what, he’d be no good to us on the inside if he got caught.
Puck got in my way as we headed for the door. “You gotta let me go with you on this one, boss.”
I shook my head. “Puck, if this goes south, I can’t have you near it. Somebody’s gotta mind the store. Let King, Hammy, and me deal with this. We’ll keep you in the loop. We don’t know how deep Paul took this. I trust you to make the right calls for the good of the club if I’m not around to do it.”