They’d slept together as man and wife for the past two nights, and would probably do so again tonight. In the eyes of the law, they were married. In her heart, they were married, but she still didn’t know what was going on inside Billy’s head. Or his heart.
She breathed a long, weary sigh.
Earline nudged her. “Come on. The sooner we serve dinner, the quicker they’ll go.”
Darcy fell into step beside Billy’s older sister. She wasn’t sure she wanted to rush everyone out because then she and Billy would be alone. If she were alone with Billy, she’d be face to face with her questions.
And one she was terrified that Billy wouldn’t ask.
BILL SQUEEZED Darcy’s hand as they stood on the porch and waved goodbye to Earline and Edd and the kids. They had stayed long enough to help with the mess, and Earline and Lougenia had relieved them of a good portion of the leftovers. Still, once Billy went back to Florida tomorrow, Darcy would probably end up tossing most of it out.
Once the minivan was out of sight, Bill drew in a long breath and turned to Darcy. They needed to talk, and it was better to do it now in the light of day than wait until tonight when they were in bed. Of course, if this didn’t go right, they might not be in bed. Not together, anyway.
He exhaled and drew her toward the swing and beckoned for Darcy to sit down. She arched an eyebrow, but said nothing as he seated himself beside her.
“We have to talk,” he said, and wished he hadn’t been so blunt. Darcy stiffened, and her breath caught in her throat.
Bill didn’t know whether that was a good sign or not, but he had to go on. He inhaled, then let it out slow. “I know we agreed that we were only getting married for Momma,” he said slowly. “But things have changed.”
Darcy opened her mouth to say something, but Bill stopped her with a finger to her lips. “Let me finish. We got ourselves in a little deeper than we’d intended. We didn’t think to use protection, so you could be pregnant. But, I still think it’s okay. We were good together. I don’t want it to end.” He swallowed and moistened his lips and waited for Darcy to respond.
She gasped and lifted her hand to her mouth. Her fingers trembled. She looked at him, her brown eyes bright and wide. Had she been expecting something else?
A real proposal?
Bill slid to the floor, setting the swing into wild motion as he went. He put a hand out to stop it, then positioned himself on one knee. He took Darcy’s hand, the one on which he’d placed his mother’s ring. “Darcy, I want you for real.”
She looked at him, her eyes wide, for a long time. Then she blinked. “I—I don’t know,” she murmured. “I wasn’t prepared for this. I need to think.” Then she yanked her hand out of his grasp and ran inside.
Bill looked after her and tried to understand. It wasn’t exactly hearts and flowers, but he’d said it from his heart. What had he done wrong? Why had she run away?
Chapter Sixteen
Pregnant?
He wanted to cover his bases in case she was pregnant!
Darcy slammed the door shut and flung herself down on the bed covered in silly pink chenille. She wanted to cry, but she clenched the soft fabric in her hands and balled it up in her fists instead. She wanted to scream, to pound something, to hurt Billy as much as he had her.
Pregnant, indeed. Shotgun marriages had gone out of style half a century ago, and besides, they were already married.
Men were so…stupid.
All she had needed to hear was that Billy loved her. Three little words. Did he seriously believe she would force him to stay married because they’d created a child?
He’d almost had her, then he’d ruined it all.
Darcy’s eyes filled with tears, but she blinked them away. She would not cry. Weak women did that, and she was not weak. She could deal with this.
She knew what to do. She wouldn’t give Billy his answer now. She’d wait to see if she really were pregnant. If she wasn’t, she’d tell him no. If she was….
Well, she’d have to think about that.
But she had plenty of time. Billy would be leaving tomorrow, and he wouldn’t be home again for weeks.
By then, maybe, she’d know the answer to both questions: was she pregnant? And did he love her?
DAMN, women were hard to figure out, Bill thought as he headed to Florida and the remaining two weeks of the NCO Academy course.
He’d have given anything to stay in Mattison and try to work it out with Darcy, but he had to get back. And Darcy had barely spoken to him since he’d asked her to remain his wife.
What the hell had he done wrong?
Had she truly meant it when she’d told him weeks ago that she had wanted to make her way herself and not depend on someone else for everything?
Why?
Bill clenched the steering wheel and wished he could squeeze it in two.
Then he relaxed.
At least she had given in and agreed to think about what he’d said. She said she’d tell him when he returned.
He’d promised not to press her, and he meant to keep his word. In fact, he’d already made up his mind not to call her at all until the class was over. He’d miss hearing her sweet voice over the phone, but maybe she’d miss him, too. Maybe if he played hard to get, she’d come running.
The dry summer scenery whizzed by as he drove, every mile taking him farther away from Darcy.
Bill only hoped that absence truly did make the heart grow fonder. Darcy’s heart, not his. He already knew how much he loved her.
He just wasn’t sure she loved him back.
DARCY SAT in the porch swing, an album filled with fading photos and yellowed newspaper clippings in her lap. She wished that Nettie were still there to tell her about the pictures, the people who populated the book, but they’d never gotten around to it.
She turned another page and sighed.
A week had passed since Billy’d left, and Darcy already knew she wasn’t pregnant. She wasn’t surprised, and she should have been happy that the complication hadn’t come to be. But in a dark little corner of her mind, she couldn’t help feeling sad. She sighed again and looked off into the deepening twilight.
It would have been wonderful to have Billy’s child, a new little human being to love, a new soul to take Nettie’s place on this earth. But that hadn’t happened, and Darcy supposed it was just as well. She didn’t want to stay married to Billy by default. She wanted to know that he loved her as much as she did him.
She had returned to work, and her days were busy enough to keep her from thinking about Billy. Every night she busied herself sorting through Nettie’s belongings, preparing them for…what? Billy?
Billy had been uncharacteristically silent since his return to Florida, and that worried her. He hadn’t called once, and Darcy missed their nightly chats. She missed the sound of his voice.
Darcy tried to rationalize that he was busy and that his schedule hadn’t permitted the time for him to call, but she knew it wasn’t true. He was making a point.
She had hurt him by not trying to explain why she’d turned him down, but she hadn’t tried, and now she missed him.
She just hoped he missed her, too.
Darcy knew beyond a shadow of doubt that she loved him. She had already decided that if he asked her again to remain married to him, she would accept. How important were those three little words, anyway?
They were only words.
How could mere words stand up against a living, breathing man? In her arms. In her bed. In her heart. Why should she miss hearing those little words when she had Billy?
Why hadn’t she said yes?
She closed the album and went inside to bed. Not to the bed she’d slept in for almost a month, but the other bed across the room. She’d never be able to sleep in her old bed again. It felt too big, too empty, and she felt too alone.
BILL SAT with the rest of his class in a roped-off section of folding chairs and waited until he was called to accept his
certificate of completion. He looked around to see wives, husbands and parents in another section of chairs and wondered how many of the other men had no one to share this day. He wondered if he was the only one who was alone.
The commandant called his name, and Bill stepped forward to accept the blue plastic folder that contained the proof of completion. He shook the man’s hand, saluted, pivoted smartly, and returned to his seat. It was easy to know what to do when there were rules and procedures. What wasn’t so easy was trying to figure out life.
The rules for life weren’t in any reg book he knew about.
What the hell should he do about Darcy?
He’d halfway hoped that she’d be so bothered by the silent treatment that she’d call him. But she hadn’t.
How many times had he gone to the pay phone in the hall and reached for it? And how many times had he walked away?
Why had he retreated?
Why couldn’t he have taken the offensive? Combat controllers were tough. They took charge. Why was he letting a woman tie him in knots?
“…Dismissed!”
Bill pulled himself out of his thoughts as his classmates tossed their hats in the air in celebration, caught them, and en masse surged toward their waiting loved ones.
He looked around. He was the only one still standing in the seats. The only one alone.
But, damn it, he vowed, he could do something about that. Not this time, of course, but next time, he would have someone waiting for him, too. If he didn’t, it wouldn’t be because he hadn’t tried.
He loved Darcy, and damn it, he was going to make sure she knew it.
He took one last look at the men and women being congratulated by their loved ones, then he turned and headed in the opposite direction. He had to clear quarters and then he was free.
Free to do everything he could think of to convince Darcy that he was the man for her.
He had no intention of ever being alone again.
He passed by a newspaper stand on the way out of the academy billets and a headline caught his eye. Missing Woman’s Car Found in Abandoned Car Lot: Foul Play Suspected!
But the headline wasn’t what had him digging in his pocket for a quarter. It was the small head shot that accompanied the article.
It was a dead ringer for Darcy. The woman he’d married.
He inserted the coin with fumbling fingers and snatched up the last copy in the rack. He started to read the article as he walked to his car, his anger growing as he read each sentence.
Darcy Stanton Hays, his wife, was in reality Tracy D’Arcy Harbeson Stanton, the missing niece of his commanding officer. The one who’d climbed out the window of the chapel and left old Dick What’s-his-name standing at the altar.
How could she not have told him who she was?
Bill unlocked the car and slid behind the wheel. The afternoon was hot, and he turned on the engine so he could use the air conditioner, but he didn’t drive. Not until he’d read every word of the article.
No wonder she hadn’t wanted to remain married to him. He hardly traveled in her circles. Her father was a general, for God’s sake. Her mother was the daughter of one of the most decorated heroes of World War II, and the rest of her family was a veritable Who’s Who of American military history.
Why the hell hadn’t he made the connection?
She’d told him she’d backed out of a marriage that her family had practically arranged. He didn’t realize that it had been just a matter of hours prior to him finding her on that deserted road.
Had she been laughing at him behind his back? Was she having a merry old time thinking she had him wound around her little finger?
He looked back at the photograph. It was apparently a college yearbook shot, and not the most flattering picture, but it looked like her, the woman he’d fallen in love with. Then he opened the paper to read the rest of the article.
Apparently, her family called her Tracy, and he’d known that the missing bride was Colonel Harbeson’s niece and assumed that she was Tracy Harbeson. The girl he’d picked up on the road had a different name. No wonder he hadn’t made the connection.
He had to get home. He had to figure out what to do. Hell, could he be accused of harboring a fugitive or something? Had he done something against the law?
He slammed his fist against the steering wheel, causing the horn to blow. Damn it. He was more confused than ever. And the only one who could clear it all up was Darcy.
He had the weekend, forty-eight hours, before he had to report back to the squadron. He would go home, and he would demand answers. He would find out why she had played him for a fool. Then he would let her go.
Even if he’d regret it for the rest of his life.
DARCY’S DAY had started slowly enough, but just when she’d thought she’d made it through, a flurry of minor emergencies that all had to be attended to had come in in the last hour. She’d been ready to pack up and leave early and had ended up staying. She finally headed home from work an hour late.
She was tired and hot and cranky. She hadn’t been sleeping well lately, and all she could think about was preparing a light supper and going to bed early. And to make matters worse, the air conditioner on Nettie’s old car had given up and died.
A thunderstorm was forming off in the distance and the hot air was thick with humidity. Lightning flickered against the backdrop of purple-gray clouds. Maybe the impending storm would help to cool things off.
She steered the car into the driveway with nothing more pressing on her mind than a cold shower and a light snack. Then she realized that there was another car in her usual parking spot by the old tool shed.
Darcy’s heart did a back flip when she realized it was Billy’s dark green Cherokee.
He was home! He’d come for her!
Excited, she parked beside the dusty Jeep and hurried toward the house.
Billy, leaning against the support column, was waiting for her in the shade of the porch. Darcy grinned and started to wave, but her smile faltered as the grim expression on Billy’s face registered. He looked as dark and as threatening as the thunderstorm building in the distance.
“What’s wrong?” Darcy tried to temper her alarm, but the expression on Bill’s face was frightening. This was a side of the man she’d never seen before.
“Oh, that’s rich,” Bill snarled. “You spend weeks laughing behind my back about how you…” He stopped, apparently too angry for words. He had a wadded-up copy of a newspaper in his hands and he threw it at her, the pages separating and fluttering out onto the lawn in the cool breeze that carried the smell of rain.
“How could you not tell me who you are?” He turned and marched inside, leaving Darcy standing, stunned, at the bottom of the steps. “How could you make me love you, then play me like a fool?”
“Who I am?” Darcy still didn’t know what he was talking about, but she guessed the newspaper would clear up the mystery. And she couldn’t defend herself until she knew what this was all about.
As fat raindrops spattered against the tin roof of the porch, she gathered up the scattered sheets of newsprint, polka-dotted with wet spots. She barely made it to the shelter of the porch before the sky opened and rain fell in blowing sheets.
PACING LIKE an angry tiger, Bill waited inside, his rage growing with each moment it took. How the hell long did it take to read one damned newspaper article?
Lightning struck nearby and with it came the acrid ozone smell. His skin tingled as the electrical charge ripped through the air.
Darcy was still on the porch! He had to get her inside where it was dry. Where it was safe.
Bill hurried to the door and a gust of wind ripped the screen out of his hands and set the door flapping against the wall. A volley of raindrops mixed with hail rattled against the tin roof, sounding like machine-gun fire. Why was she still sitting out there?
He pushed outside. Darcy was in the swing, the newspaper clasped tightly in her hands. Her face was wet and her eyes cl
ouded, her expression miserable. She was soaking wet and shivering, whether from the cold rain or something else, he didn’t know.
“I—I’m sorry, Darcy,” he said, holding out his hand, but wanting to scoop her into his arms, though he didn’t dare. He had to make it right first. “Come inside.” Apologies didn’t come easy to him, but he struggled for the right words. “I didn’t mean to take it out on you.”
She looked up at him and took his hand. A little of the light had returned to her eyes, but her expression was wary. “I guess I owe you an explanation,” Darcy murmured, shivering as Bill led her inside.
“That would be a good start,” Bill said, grabbing a kitchen towel and rubbing the excess water off her skin, skin he’d rather be kissing. No, he had to harden his heart. At least, until he’d heard what Darcy had to say.
“I don’t know where to begin,” she answered weakly. “I was so confused.”
“Go on.” It was hard not to drag her to him, not to crush her in his arms, but Bill determined he would remain aloof, objective, until she’d had her say.
“Looking back on it, I’m not really sure why I agreed to marry Dick,” she said simply. “He had given me a long list of good reasons that had more to do with pedigrees than affection. My mother had gone on and on about the wonderful match, and it seemed easier to go along with everyone than to make waves. I’d known Dick forever, we’d dated on and off in high school and college, and I hadn’t had that much experience with other guys.” She shrugged. “What did I know? I didn’t know how love was supposed to feel.
“Until I met you,” she said, so softly that Bill wasn’t sure he hadn’t wished it.
“I—I guess it was just easier to go along with it than to disagree.” She smiled wanly through a sheen of moisture that Bill knew this time was from tears. “I figured that if all the other things were right, then love would grow. And, to tell the truth, I was ready to get out from under my parents’ influence and be on my own.
“Only Dick just proved to be a younger version of my parents. He didn’t want me to work.” She looked up, her eyes bright with indignation. “How could he expect me to go along with that after I’d knocked myself out to succeed in nursing school?”
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