by Nana Malone
"He is my assignment. I don't know what you're talking about." Problem was, she'd always been a bad liar.
"See, the thing is, I'm good at reading people. It's the way you don't look at each other. The way you orbit each other but don't interact. Fuck, you smell like him half the time. Oh, and one night I was coming from an ice run and saw him leaving your room at 4:30 in the morning. Guy looked well used."
Her brain worked, trying to figure out when they'd ever been careless. There'd been one night a couple of weeks ago. After we went to San Diego. It had been in Miami, and they'd actually been working. Working naked, maybe, but they'd been going over the new endorsements that had come his way since the team started to win. He'd wanted her opinion. That, and video chat just hadn't cut it. They'd both needed to touch each other. "I don't know what you're talking about." All she wanted to do was get into the room. Even if Aaron was inclined to tell anyone, she and Dax would recover. It would be fine.
He sneered at her. "You act so fucking high and mighty. With all your 'I don't date' and 'I'm just here to work' bullshit. When what you really meant is, 'You don't have enough money to be worth my time.' He leaned in close, and the scotch on his breath had her recoiling. It didn't smell spicy and inviting like it did on Dax's breath.
"You've been drinking." They'd passed around a celebratory drink in the meeting, but it was looking like Aaron had had more than one.
"You don't even know the kind of guy you're fucking, unless you don't care." He grabbed her arm, and pain shot through her from her shoulder to pinky. She raised a shoe to go into full attack mode, but the next thing she knew, her arm was free and the scent of scotch no longer surrounded her.
She whipped around to find Damon and Dax in Aaron's face, fighting for the pleasure of ending his life. The flood of adrenaline made her head spin, and it took a second to realize Aaron was talking. And his face was bloody. Was that Damon or Dax? Dax. Blood dripped from his hand.
Aaron was saying something. "Does she know about the night at the club? The blonde. That you fucked her?"
What? Who did Dax fuck? Dax's brows snapped into a deep frown. "See that's the problem with lying. You'll always be found out. I never fucked some blonde at the club." The conviction in his voice made her heart soar.
Problem was Aaron was smirking. "Oh, really? Is that why I have a video of you getting a blowjob at Blink nightclub the night you met Asha there? From a woman appropriately named Barbie, of course. I was there. I saw you go off with the girl. I didn't think I'd get anything so good, but man, I found her again and hit paydirt. She'd been recording part of your tryst to show her boyfriend. I guess the joke's on you. Bitch is pregnant."
Asha's stomach roiled. Blonde from the club? What club? Dax hadn't really been out much. He was on the phone with her every night. They were attached at the—no. No, they weren't. That first night she met with him. When she'd felt that spark. He'd stayed. Oh, God.
The look on his face told her everything. There had been a blonde. And just when she thought she was going to be sick, and the gray on the edges of her vision edged in, Damon let go of Aaron and his fist connected with Dax's face.
Twenty-Four
"Dax, you're being stubborn for no good reason. Just call the lawyer."
Dax shook his head as he paced his living room. "No, Echo. I'm not doing it. This is not a Coulter problem. This is a Dax problem. I've worked really hard to distinguish myself from the fold, and I'm not running back because it's convenient."
His sister sighed. "Look, I understand. You want to stand on your own two feet. But if this girl goes to the press, or worse, that asshole leaks it, you're toast. All your hard work to become this new you is over."
He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Truth be told, I'm pretty sure no one expected this new me to last too long, right? What's the current bet on how long before I fucked up?"
His sister was silent for a beat too long. When she finally spoke, she said, "You are the only one who thought that. You. No one else, Dax."
"Oh, come on. You and I both know Gramps has money riding on me fucking up."
"That's enough. I love Gramps, but let's face it the geezer can be an asshole. Especially when it comes to you. Or, you know, something new. You've been locked in this battle for his approval for too long. You know, no one ever saw you as a screwup until you started playing to that. You have always been just as capable as the rest of us. But you thought it was your lot in life to take on the black-sheep mantle."
Shit, that burning, in his chest, it was back. The emptiness once again threatened to consume him. To take over. To engulf him and drag him down. "Echo, I liked being this me."
"Newsflash, twin brother. I like all the versions of you. Because they are part of you, and I always believed in you. You're the only one selling yourself short."
"Now you sound like Asha."
"Well, she's a smart girl."
He licked his lips and stopped in front of his fireplace, where a selfie of him and Asha had taken center stage amongst the family photos. Fuck, he missed her. "You never asked me if I slept with her."
Again his sister sighed. "Because it doesn't matter. Anything that happened, or didn't happen, would have been before you and Asha got together. Even if you couldn't see it, since she showed up you've been tuning to her frequency. One day, I hope someone looks at me how you look at her. That would be awesome. Besides, if you say you didn't sleep with her, I believe you. You have been an ass in the past, but you're no liar."
With her words, she peeled back another layer of fog he'd always assumed stood between him and his family. She knew him. Bryce saw him. He'd always held himself apart a little because he thought he needed to. But that was his own shit. "Thanks, Echo."
"Of course, what are—?" Her question was interrupted by movement into the room.
"Dax?"
He bit back the groan at the sound of his grandfather's voice on the line. The old man had commandeered the phone from his sister.
"I've been hearing rumblings, son. Did you pull a Dax again? Once again think with the little head instead of the big one? Because if you've jeopardized the Coulter—"
That was it. He had had it. "That's enough, Gramps."
There was a beat of silence then sputtering, and then his grandfather started again. "Now, you listen—"
"No, it's time for you to listen. You think I'm not good enough, you're entitled to your opinion. I, on the other hand, am no longer interested in hearing about it. Besides, thanks to winning, I get the rush of love from the fans now, so I don't need your approval anymore. And while I'm at it, I'm in love with Asha Wix. I know I might just about give you a coronary with that information. But I'm telling you that now so you have time to work your way around to that thought. No more off-color comments. No more mentions of her ethnicity unless it's to ask a thoughtful question."
"Now if you think—"
"Not done, Gramps. I love my name. I love how I grew up. But if the family can't let me be me, I will drop the last name and start going by Mom's maiden name or something."
"You wouldn't dare!"
"Watch me." And then Dax did something he'd never considered doing in his life. He hung up. No one in their right mind had ever told off Rory Coulter. Ever. First, he hoped Gramps survived. Second, he waited for the nervous anxiety, but it didn't come. He didn't need the old man's approval. Not anymore. Asha had changed that for him. He just hoped she took him back. Because he was going to go all-in with her. She was everything to him, and it was time he showed it.
Dax wiped his hands on his jeans, waiting for someone to answer. When the door whipped open, Damon cut an imposing figure. "D?" he nodded.
Damon just crossed his arms. "What do you want, Dax?"
"Dude, this whole thing is a fucking mess. I'm just trying to fix it. You're my best friend, and I need you to know I would never hurt her intentionally. That thing with that girl. I—that was before Asha. I didn't even…that girl is someone's sister, too, and w
ell, I'm a dick. I've always been a dick. But for some reason the people in your family have faith in me, and I screwed that up. "
Damon shook his head. "Shut up, Dax."
"No, man. I'm not shutting up. I came to talk to you, and I'm not leaving until it's said. I love Asha. And that girl, that happened when I was trying to do right by you and stay the fuck away from Asha. I was willing to take any out. Just as long as it wasn't Asha. Things with the two of us just spiraled so quickly and the next thing I know I'm falling for her hard. And that ache in my chest is almost unbearable. I would never have intentionally hurt her."
Damon shook his head. "You think I'm mad about some groupie? Shit, I've lost count of how many women I've slept with. I'm mad because you lied."
"No, Damon. I didn't. Yeah sure, I got a mediocre blowjob for my efforts, but I never slept with that girl. I don't lie to you. Not to the guy that's pulled my ass out of the fire a dozen times. And never to Asha."
Damon met his gaze and Dax held it, unwavering. It only took a minute, but then Damon's enormous shoulders sagged. "Shit. You really didn't sleep with her?"
"No, I really didn't. The tape Aaron claims to have is a fake. I didn't fuck that girl. She might be pregnant, but it's certainly not mine. You know me. This isn't my brand of asshole."
Damon nodded. "I know. I've known you almost half my life. You'll drink too much and sleep with a lot of women. Sometimes even at the same time. But you are unabashed at that. You keep the secrets, but you don't lie. I should have known it. It's just—this is my sister, man."
"I know. And it's killing me that I hurt her. That I hurt you."
"So what are you going to do?" Damon asked.
"Besides apologize to you? I haven't come up with much. I need to talk to her, but I haven't figured out how. I fucked this up."
"Well, you have to do the whole grand gesture thing. Off her feet and into your bed, or whatever. Make it a good gesture and she can't help but forgive you."
"I hope you're right about that."
Twenty-Five
So this was what it meant to be lovesick. Well, Asha was tired of it. Frankly, it sucked. She'd take old, uptight Asha any day. At least that version of her didn't have a big, old, gaping hole where her heart used to be.
Every day, she woke up and put on her Asha suit. The one with the determined face that didn't cry at her desk or lick her wounds…on the outside. On the inside, she was a mess. Inside-her was walking around in her pajamas with ice-cream stains on them, and hadn't showered in three days. And had drunk-dialed and hung-up on Dax twenty-two times.
In truth, they hadn't spoken. Dax had walked away from her. He'd let Aaron go and looked between her and Damon. He hadn't said a word before he walked away. And afterward, no call, no nothing. Poof. Gone. Not a thing after the shit that went down a week ago. Her brother had taken her to the police to file a report.
Work passed in a blur. Aaron had been removed from his job. It turned out that Thrashers management really were zero tolerance. And she'd also learned that he'd made passes at two of the other girls on staff. He'd said he was going to sue Dax for hitting him, but she knew that was mostly bluster. Or at least she hoped so. The little shit would undo all her good work. Not that you care anymore. And of course, HR had been sincerely apologetic, wanting to know if she had other grievances to file. But all she wanted to do every day since that night was crawl into a hole and sleep. Either that or run to Dax's apartment and beg him to lie to her and tell her he didn't sleep with that girl.
With the team winning, babysitters were no longer needed, so she could focus more on traditional marketing. She found that more boring somehow. But with everyone gearing up for the playoffs, it was all-hands. She hadn't seen him in a week, and she missed him something awful. But she didn't have time to pout.
Sam was in town for a conference, and they had lunch plans. She would enjoy her time with her bestie and not sulk. She was in serious need of girl time.
When Sam showed up to meet her, it was pretty quiet at the office, as most everyone else had gone out for lunch. "So this is where the magic happens? Where you guys convince us a man with the nickname The Devil can also sell kids sports bottles or something?"
Asha laughed. "Something like that."
Sam sat back in Asha's seat and twirled, her thick, dark hair flying out as she did so. "If you don't mind me saying so, you look like hell. You fell in love, didn't you?"
"Sam, I just need you to hug me and tell me it's going to be okay right now, all right?"
"I would. Except you're not really one for hugs, and you've never wanted anyone to feed you any bullshit, so I'm going to kick it to you straight. You don't look good, babe."
"You think I don't know that? That I don't see the pitying looks people give me? Nobody here knew, but they suspected."
"Does he love you?"
Asha shook her head. "No."
"And you're sure of that? Because some girl said she slept with him?"
"You should have seen his face, Sam. And the way he just walked away from me."
Sam frowned. "All I'm saying is, maybe you should give the guy a chance to explain."
"I thought you said to stay away from him and not to be a proho."
"Well," Sam slid her gaze away. "That was before I saw how you looked. That picture of you two from the wedding. You looked so happy. I've never seen you that happy. And now you just look so sad. I want to fix it for you, and I think if you talked to him, you'd feel better."
"He's had all this time to talk to me. He hasn't even called." That was the shit that hurt the worst. She'd been waiting for him to call. To tell her something, anything. But nope. And besides sneaking to watch practice, she hadn't even seen him. It was like he was a figment of her imagination. "He would have called if he wanted me. And he hasn't."
Sam shrugged. "You ever think maybe he hasn't called because he thinks the one person that has had faith in him no longer does? That he is truly alone? Did that ever occur to you?"
Pain sliced through her chest. No. She'd never considered that. But he didn't even need her now. Hell, he hadn't really needed her before. He just needed some tweaking. And he thinks you don't have faith in him. And honestly, did she have faith? She kept thinking back to that look on his face. Horror and…something. Disbelief? Why the disbelief, though? Her gaze flickered to Sam's. "It never even occurred to me. I screwed up, huh?"
Sam shrugged. "Dunno. But maybe you should talk to him. Then maybe you'll stop looking like death warmed over. So lunch. But first, I want to see the field. My bestie works for a playoff team; I want a tour."
"Fair enough." How had everything gotten so messed up? Things got messed up when you stopped trusting in him.
She led Sam down to the hallway to the field. The main door was open, but it was eerily quiet. Usually, the place was teeming with people. When she walked out, Sam at her side, Dax walked toward them. Asha glared at Sam. "A setup?"
Her friend shrugged. "A conference, really? You believed that? Dude, the man loves you. He tracked me down. Flew me out here. Put him out of his misery."
The tears welled. Oh, no. No, no, no. She was not that girl who cried at work. But she wanted to be. Because when Dax walked toward her in jeans and a white T-shirt, he looked better than anything she'd ever seen in her life. And damn, she'd missed him.
What if she doesn't forgive you? The thought ran through his head, over and over and over again. All week, he'd been trying to figure out what to say to her, who to be without her, and it all came back to the fact that he was better with her. Far better. And that empty feeling was gone. But not because of her, more because he let someone see him. And it felt good. He nodded at Sam. "Thank you for getting her here."
"Damn, you're pretty. I can see why she likes you."
Dax smiled briefly. "Thanks?" he phrased it like a question.
Sam laughed. "Any man who goes to all this trouble must be in love. You have my vote." She scampered off to join Damon and the others.
"I'll call you when I get back to New Orleans, Ash."
"Dax, what did you do?" her voice was soft.
"I'm showing you I've been paying attention. Your whole life, you wanted people see you. Well, I see you, and yes, you're beautiful, but you're also smart, and funny, and kind, and patient. Fuck, are you patient. And you're tenacious and I am completely in love with you."
Her eyes went wide.
Shit. Now or never. He was going for broke. "And in case you need to hear it, I didn't sleep with that girl. Yes, we hooked up in the bathroom and frankly, it felt shitty, and I'm being honest when say I could barely keep it going. But the point is, I don't even know that girl. Yes, she blew me, but I didn't sleep with her. I spent the last couple of days sorting out lawyers and investigators to find her. For once, I handled things on my own. She’s recanting her story. Aaron had tried to get her to leak the whole thing, but all she ever wanted was for her boyfriend to pay attention to her. And she wanted bragging rights. The whole thing just got completely out of hand."
"Dax."
"Let me finish, please. I know you thought I lied to you. But I didn't. I was so surprised when Aaron said she was pregnant. I was shell-shocked and confused, and I could see it on your face, and I thought you lost faith in me."
"Dax. I have had nothing but one hundred percent faith in you from the beginning. But you just walked away from me. Like I could be discarded in a heartbeat, and that hurt. That really hurt."
"I know, and I have been thinking of how to make that up to you in every way. I am in love with you. I have been ever since you walked into the training room and started bossing me around. I never should have walked away from you. I should have given you the chance to have faith in me. I am sorry. Please forgive me."
She rapidly blinked away tears, and he wasn't sure if that was a good thing. "Asha?"
"I love you, too."
Relief hit him square between the shoulders, and he wobbled. Oh, God. She was forgiving him. "I swear to God, I am never walking away from you again."