The three of us had so much fun this evening, but now it’s time for a different kind of fun for the two of us.
I take a quick shower while Sean cleans up. How thoughtful of him to do the dishes. He’s definitely going to get rewarded for that.
Out of the blue the doorbell rings. Awfully late for a visitor I think, as I towel off in the bedroom.
I move closer to the bedroom door and I absolutely freeze when I hear the voice. It sends chills up my spine and my eyes bulge.
“Hey buddy! Thought I’d surprise you. How you been?”
“Hey Rick,” Sean says. “Well, you’ve definitely surprised me.”
I hear the sound and pacing of boots walking across the floor and it’s instantly identifiable.
Rick as in Rick Upton…my dad!
“Mind if I grab a beer?” he asks.
“Have a seat,” Sean says. “I’ll get it for you.
My eyes dart toward the bed as I sort through my clothes. Thank god I didn’t start stripping in the living room. Everything’s accounted for and it’s a race to see how quickly I can get dressed without making a sound.
“You seem a bit frazzled. Everything okay?” I hear my dad ask.
“You know me,” Sean says. “Everything is always okay.”
“Okay. Just wanted to make sure you didn’t have a hot date lined up tonight or anything.”
“I’m too old for a big night out on the town these days,” Sean says.
I’m glad he didn’t deny he had a hot date while still answering my dad’s question. He’s always got my back, even in the most trying of times.
“So you don’t mind if I stay over?”
“No, no problem at all,” Sean says, raising his voice. He must have heard the water shut off a few minutes ago and knows I’m out of the shower. “Couch pulls out, no prob.”
“Hate to ask you this, brother, but I’ve been flying for two days straight. Afghanistan to all the way here, and then the cab ride. Do you mind if I sleep on a proper bed tonight? Next dinner is on me.”
“No problem. The bed is all yours.”
“Great,” he says. “Cheers.” I hear the beer bottles clink.
“If you don’t mind I’ll grab a quick shower. Don’t want to dirty up your couch.”
“You got it. Just let me check and make sure the hot water heater’s on. It might need a minute to warm up.”
“Cold water is even better. It’s hotter than two rats screwing in a sock in the middle of summer over there in Afghanistan.”
I hear my dad’s boots again, and I grab my purse and dart towards the closet.
Just as I slide the door closed I hear him enter the room.
“Water okay, Rick?”
“Sure it will be fine. Thanks, buddy.”
I look through the slats in the closet door as my dad pulls his shirt up over his head. He makes his way through the bedroom and into the bathroom. I’m just waiting to hear the water turn on and him to start whistling and I’m out of her immediately!
I reach for the knob, waiting for the moment. I hear the water, but don’t hear the shower curtain. My dad is an old school Marine. He may not even close it. Rats!
I start to pull the knob towards me when suddenly I see my dad walk back through the bedroom…in his underwear!
I close my eyes tight, but remember I can’t. I have to watch this no matter how painful the idea of seeing my dad in a compromised state might be. Just keep your eyes at head level, I tell myself, not that I need any reminding.
“Hey buddy. That first one went down too quick. Can I grab another?”
“I’ll bring it to you.”
“Thanks, man!”
Suddenly my dad is cutting through the bedroom again and as he’s walking away he slides out of his tighty whities. Oh my god! Gross! I can’t believe this is happening.
I hear the water hitting the base of the shower, and then it stops. He’s in!
I prepare to pull the knob again and take a deep breath. Just as I’m about ready to make a run for it, the water hits the base of the shower again. What in the world is he doing?
Then, I get the sight that will give me nightmares for the rest of my life.
“Where does he keep the damn towels,” my dad says as he walks right toward the closet I’m in!
I take a step back and slide behind an oversized coat. Thank god New York City gets cold winters and Sean is huge.
I’ve got my body turned sideways and my shoes pointing forward when the doors come flying open.
“There we go,” he says, and I hear my dad reach up for a towel on the shelf above the hangers.
He shuts the doors and I open my mouth breathing out a sigh of relief.
“Pink! What the hell? Not being out in the field is making him soft.”
A second later the doors fly open again and I can see my dad’s wet feet. He’s standing on his tiptoes looking for a towel that he feels is masculine enough for him. Oh my god, dad! It’s just a towel. No one’s even going to see you…except maybe your own daughter right now! So disgusting.
The doors shut again and I’ve learned my lesson. I stay in position and wait until I hear the break in the water again.
I slide back towards the handles and the doors fly open!
My whole body pulls back and I almost scream!
“Sean!” I mouth.
He points toward the door, and as I slide out he gives me a quick pat on the behind.
“Don’t come out, Rick. Don’t want to see anything that might make us not friends anymore. I’ll set your beer next to the sink.”
“Can’t hear you,” my dad says and I hear Sean’s loud fake cough just as I round the corner ducking out of the bedroom.
“Dude! Cover that thing up!” Sean says.
I tiptoe towards the door, turn the handle and turn the lock as I step outside and then slowly and quietly close the door.
I go to turn and walk away, but in my nervousness I decide an all out sprint is better…or not. I trip and sideswipe a garbage can sending it toppling over. Of course it’s not one of the new plastic ones owned by 99% of the American population. It’s an old galvanized steel one. I fumble with the garbage bags, stacking them back inside as the car alarm next to me starts wailing in my ear. I set the can upright and take off running.
“Thief! Get him!” a man’s voice yells as I find myself sprinting away from a bad situation once again.
I never thought I would be so happy to be called a man before. At least they’ll be looking for the wrong person.
And that’s just how I would describe my dad. He was the absolute wrong person to show up at the worst possible minute, but somehow I got out of there without getting detected…I think.
CHAPTER 16
Sean
Eight weeks later
I’m supposed to be shipping out for the next six months, but all I can think about is her.
Brittney.
I still can’t believe we got caught. I thought for sure we were home free, but in the morning her dad decided last minute to call her first instead of just showing up and surprising her. That was all well and good, until he wondered why it seemed like he could hear the call ringing both in his ear and in the bedroom. At first he just thought his equilibrium might be out of balance due to all the travel and proximity to the constant barrage of mortar rounds he experienced daily during his last stint in the Middle East.
He figured all the noises of military life had finally caught up with him, but he wasn’t ready to admit he was getting older or losing a step. He decided he’d try again just to make sure his ears weren’t playing tricks on him. He called again and realized maybe he was onto something. Then he started to think his daughter was in my closet.
It wasn’t her, but it was her phone. It had fallen out when she made her escape. There was really no explaining away that one. Why couldn’t he just show up uninvited at her place like he did at mine? That would have solved everyone a lot of trouble.
But now everything’s all messed up.
Rick took her phone and forbid her to see me, at least in the short-term. To make matters worse, he pulled her out of college and enrolled her in one of those study at home undergrad programs. If he wants to punish me, fine, but don’t punish your daughter’s future in the process.
I felt terrible. Not seeing Brittney was the worst, but knowing I may have had a hand in sabotaging her future was equally as painful.
And to make matters worse, my NCIS stint was up. Somehow they wanted me to do a tour abroad now, even as a single parent. That made no sense to me. My ex was happy to have Isabella all to herself for the next half-year, but I’m not so sure the feeling was mutual.
My wife’s career had taken off, but then it hit a snag. She had a lot more time on her hands now, which opened up possibilities for her to “get back to being a good mother.” The sound of those words angered me more than she could have ever known. There are no breaks in parenting. It’s a commitment you make to yourself as well as your children. I know she was committed to doing a good job now, but her word choice still had me feeling shaky.
I was doing everything I could to fight the deployment. I thought if I put up a big enough fuss via the right channels I might be able to stay where I was. I only had another three years until I retired. Why send this old man back into the thick of things?
I definitely wasn’t one to shirk responsibility, but in this case I just thought my talents were better put to use elsewhere. Sitting around in the heat and the dust all day with guys in their late teens and early twenties was doable, but solving crimes with my mind here was much more appealing and valuable to country and Corps. Plus my last case had been a big hit. I found all the guys behind the Veterans Day Parade terrorism attempt and got them put away for good. I was good at this kind of work, and I felt I could save a lot of lives if I stayed where I was.
But now everything was in the hands of the powers that be in Quantico, and it wasn’t looking good.
But the real reason I wanted to stay was that I knew if I had enough time I could convince Rick that what Brittney and I have is real. And word choice here is critical. I say what Brittney and I have, and not what we had, because my feelings for her are just as strong as they ever were. If he could just see us together he’d know, but he wasn’t about to give it a chance. Not now. Not ever.
Still I knew time could heal, and time could make him see.
But I was running out of time. In three days I was shipping out. I had to come up with a plan…and fast.
CHAPTER 17
Brittney
My old phone was so beat up the ringer didn’t even work. My dad got me a new phone before I left for college so I’d make sure and hear his calls.
Well, I certainly didn’t hear the most important call he ever made to that phone but he sure did. And it was his last call. He never gave that phone back, so I had no way of calling Sean again. His number was stored in my contacts, nowhere else.
And to add insult to injury when my dad found out, he took Sean’s phone and deleted my number from his before he told him what he’d discovered.
I had hoped that Sean would pull up the report he ran when I was a person of interest in the Veterans Day Parade case, but then I remembered he did the “interrogation” so quickly he didn’t even bother to take down my details. We had no way of contacting each other, other than a face to face.
And that wasn’t happening anytime soon. Sean had Isabella to look after and my dad had pulled me out of school and made me move in back home.
I almost had everything, and then I lost it all.
And to make matters worse I hadn’t been feeling very well lately. And with all the stress I’d missed my last two periods. I was worrying so much and I was stuck at home all the time so I started eating more. I wasn’t walking to class anymore so I didn’t have much of a chance to burn off the calories. I just felt so hungry and worn down all the time.
I Googled ways to eliminate chronic fatigue and this slight illness that I’d been carrying. After spending about an hour reading about the effects of stress, I clicked on another link on WebMD that told me possible other causes that might be leading to my symptoms.
“No. There’s no way,” I say, as I lean back in my chair and stare at the computer screen.
I read through the symptoms. Perfect match.
I read through the behaviors. Definitely a perfect match.
What was I thinking? Here I was thinking about how mature and amazing Sean is, and I wasn’t even mature enough to take simple steps to protect myself.
I can blame it on the passion of the moment, but there were many in the brief time we had together. I never took the initiative once. Now I had to take the initiative and see if what might be, is.
I run to the pharmacy in the mall. No way I’m doing this at home. There’s always a chance my mom somehow finds out. I can’t take any more risks. I pay for the test and head to the mall bathroom. This is like a bad dream. Scratch that, this is an absolute nightmare. I feel like one of those commercials they show high school girls…don’t wind up like this.
A minute later and it’s confirmed. I did wind up just like that.
I put down the lid on the toilet seat, and sit down. I bury my face in my hands and it starts.
“Is everything okay in there?”
“Yeah. I’m fine. Thanks.”
“You don’t sound fine. Can I get you anything?”
“No. I just want to be alone. Alone,” I say.
“Okay. Sorry if I bothered you.”
I told the voice I want to be alone. What was I talking about? I am alone.
Alone. Sick. Depressed.
And pregnant with the child of a man I haven’t spoken with in two months.
I am the definition of alone.
CHAPTER 18
Sean
Two days later
I pack up my seabag and give the house one last look.
Isabella’s mom already came by and picked her up. Check.
Bills are all paid up in advance for the next six months. Check.
No visible signs showing that no one’s home? Check.
Everything’s completely turned off? Check.
I sit down on the couch and call a car. They’re busy, but they’ll do the best they can to get a car over as soon as possible.
I can hear the clock ticking on the wall. It adds an eerie stillness to the room…a room without laughter and life. It’s been that way since she left.
And now six more months are going to go by.
She’ll move on, and when I get back I’ll have two and a half more years of this. It’s just Isabella and me from now on.
I love my little girl and I’m at peace with it just being the two of us again, but I really thought I had something perfect. Everything was so right, until it all came screeching to a halt. Now it’s gone. Who am I fooling? I’m not at peace with any of this.
The doorbell rings. Well, at least I don’t have time to wallow in my misery. I grab my seabag and head for the door.
I take one last look at the inside of my house, and then open the door.
I’m expecting to see a man who drives for a living, but I’m greeted by just about the exact opposite.
“Brittney?”
“Hey.”
“Are you okay?”
She pauses, not answering my question.
I toss my seabag back inside and grab her, holding her in my arms.
“Can I come in?” she asks in-between tears.
I carry her across the threshold and sit down with her on the couch. I’m holding her tight, trying to will the pain away. I never want to see her like this. Not now. Not ever.
She buries her head in my shirt, and I can feel the wetness from her tears. I reach for the bottom of my shirt, trying my best to dry her eyes.
“What’s wrong, beautiful?”
“I’m…not…beautiful,” she says in-between sobs as her chest heaves.<
br />
“You’re always beautiful to me.”
“I’m ugly and I’m fat and I’m…pregnant,” she says.
“You’re not,” my mind freezes. “You’re…what?”
“I’m pregnant, Sean! And I don’t have anywhere to go and no one to turn to.”
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