Stupid Girl

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Stupid Girl Page 14

by Mary E. Twomey


  “Would it have gone over better if I’d said ninety?”

  “Yes.”

  Kerdik shrugged. “Fine. Then I’m ninety percent certain this will work.”

  I growled my frustration. “You’re making me crazy!”

  Everyone took a visible step back from my outburst, except for Bastien, who inched closer to me. They all expected Kerdik to get pushed one shove too far and implode like the child he sometimes was. Kerdik narrowed his almond-shaped eyes at me until they were irritable slits. “I’m the one with the power, so what I say goes. Deal with it.”

  Panic welled in my chest. “I don’t want you to hurt him for nothing!”

  Kerdik studied the emotion I didn’t bother to hide. “I would never hurt something I loved for nothing. But I’ll break him a thousand times over if it gives me even a sliver of a chance to have him back. It isn’t just you who’s got a stake in this.”

  I glowered at him. “Let’s put it to a vote.”

  Kerdik shrugged. “Do whatever you like, but I don’t bow to the majority, whether they follow reason or not.”

  I thrust my hand into the air. “I vote we don’t gamble my dad on a whim that has a less than awesome chance of working, but a perfect score that it’ll put him in pain, possibly for nothing. I vote we look for another option.”

  To my surprise and disappointment, no one else’s hands went up. I balked at them, but Kerdik’s smile only grew. “Hmm. Perhaps I should invest in democracy after all. Yes, let’s go with the majority here.”

  My mouth drew into a tight line, my arms akimbo as I glared at Kerdik. “Oh, you are so smug. I guess I’m the only one who cares about King Urien here.”

  Lane rubbed her temples, and it was the first time I noticed she was leaning heavily on Reyn. “Honey, we all care about Urien. We care enough about him to think long-term. The worst that happens is he’s in pain for a short amount of time. He can handle pain. No one can handle being cut off from living for this long. We owe it to him to try every possibility until we’ve exhausted all the options.”

  “Fine. I’ll go break the news. Let him know how painful all of your guys’ love is.”

  Lane sighed, the sound lingering in the air as I spun around and pushed through the bedroom door. My dad had been laid on a bed near the window in hopes that a little old-fashioned Vitamin D might do whatever vitamins were supposed to do in this situation. I popped open the glass pane and let a handful of birds in, giving them someone to sing over. Hopefully it might distract my dad from his unending nothingness.

  “Urien? It’s R-Britney. Britney Spears. How are you feeling this evening, sir?” It felt off calling my dad “sir”, but I wasn’t sure how cordial a relationship he liked to keep. Morgan hadn’t liked anything too familiar.

  His voice came out in a desperate rush. “You came back! I was worried something had happened to you again, and I would be trapped in here forever. I was shouting for you for days when you disappeared that first time.”

  “Yes, well, Morgan’s not here anymore, so you don’t have to worry about anyone throwing me down a well anytime soon. She’s back in Province 1, and I’m safe with Duchess Elaine in Province 9.” It was the fiftieth time I’d told him as much, but apparently I wasn’t the only one traumatized by the whole getting thrown down a well thing. Urien counted on me to listen to him, to give him a break in the abyss in which he was forever stuck. Each time I visited him after I’d gone missing brought forth another batch of relief. I knew part of that was circumstantial, but darn it, if my heart didn’t leap at the sound of my dad being glad I was around. “You doing alright?”

  He pfft’d. “I hope one day I can answer that question with some amount of optimism. I’m stuck in here. I heard Kerdik in the room earlier. Is he any closer to breaking me out of this?”

  I sat on the edge of the bed as Kerdik, Bastien, Lane and Reyn came into the bedroom. I picked up my father’s hand and patted the back of it, hoping one day it would be strong enough to hold me together when everything fell apart, as life had a tendency of doing. “Kerdik’s here, along with Lane, Reyn and Bastien. Kerdik’s got an idea, but ultimately you get to decide if you want to risk it.”

  “Whatever it is, I’ll risk it.” His answer came too quick for my liking.

  Kerdik tsked me that I’d put the decision in the hands of my dad, and not in his own, which is where he assumed every important thing belong. He leaned over my shoulder, his hand on my spine for balance as he spoke to my dad. “Urien, can you hear me?” He sounded like he was testing a microphone.

  My dad’s voice came out grim and frustrated. “Of course. It’s only me no one can hear.”

  “He can hear you,” I confirmed for Kerdik.

  Kerdik laid out his entire plan. There were so many technical magical details and horticultural elements. I knew I’d never be able to relay the message to Urien without Kerdik there to spell it all out. “It’s what needs to be done, old friend. I wouldn’t risk the pain if it wasn’t the only option.”

  Urien didn’t hesitate. “I’ll do it. Whatever needs to be done, let’s start now. This very moment. I need to find my daughter.”

  There was something so very Superman about the whole thing. He didn’t wince from the pain, only faced the inevitable with a surety that he would do whatever it took to guarantee a bright future. He was a king if ever I saw one. My emotions stuck to my throat when I tried to piece together a response. “I’ll take you to your daughter as soon as you’re back to yourself.”

  “Can you bring her to me now? I should like to listen to her voice, even if she can’t hear mine.”

  I pressed my father’s knuckles to my cheek, closing my eyes while Kerdik gave my spine a reassuring rub. “You just focus on you for now. I’ll make sure Rosie’s here when you open your eyes.”

  Bastien and Lane both mouthed, “Tell him!” but I didn’t want to risk it. He needed a clear head if he was going to make it through the searing pain. Kerdik didn’t bother to hold back the details of it all.

  I leaned back into Kerdik, turning and burrowing my forehead into his neck. “Okay, go ahead and start. He’s ready.” I stood and moved across the room to sink into Bastien’s waiting embrace. He was so unbelievably open now. I didn’t know what to do with my good luck. His thick forearms banded around me, crushing me to his chest with a loving protectiveness I don’t know how I ever lived without.

  Kerdik clenched his fist a few times, and out of the bottom squeezed a plant with five green leaves that had pink on the tips. “Take her out of here,” he ordered Bastien. “I don’t want her near these leaves.”

  “What’s wrong with the leaves?”

  “Poisonous if you do it wrong.”

  “Huh? No! Kerdik, if there’s a chance you’ll poison Urien, you can’t do it!”

  Bastien didn’t waste any time hustling me out the door. He held me tight in the hallway, though I struggled against him to get back in. “Shh. Kerdik wouldn’t risk killing your dad and pissing you off for all of eternity unless he knew what he was doing. He’s doing all this for you, so let him.”

  I tried to stretch around Bastien for the door, but I was still more than a foot from my goal. “Bastien, let me go!”

  A guttural howl started up from inside the room. It was too deep to belong to Reyn, and too agonized to belong to Kerdik. Kerdik mostly moaned and whined when he was in dire straits. “Urien! I’m here! I’m here! It’s okay!” I struggled, and then let out a shout at the sound of my Superman crying out his pain.

  “Can you hear him? Is he alright?”

  “No! He’s hurting, and you’re keeping me from him!”

  Bastien made an executive decision to piss me off when he lifted me off the ground and carried me like a bride through the mansion and down the steps. “You don’t need to be hearing that. He wouldn’t want you to see him in pain. You need to let Kerdik handle this.”

  “If you’re wrong and he dies, it’s on you that I’m missing my last moments with my
dad!”

  Bastien flinched, but didn’t stop until we reached the kitchen. He plopped me down on the stool at the island in the center of the kitchen, unapologetic that he’d taken the choice away from me. Faith, Hope and Mercy were working on cleaning up from dinner as quickly as they could, but they stopped their progress to fawn over me like the aunts I wished they were. They never passed up an opportunity to be sweet to me. Their late-forties plump curves and grandmotherly chortles made the kitchen feel warm and welcoming, no matter how dreary the day. “What’s wrong, Princess?” Hope asked, wiping her stained hands on her apron.

  I wasn’t sure how much I was allowed to say about any of it, so I shook my head. “Just a rough day.”

  Mercy seemed to flit to my side with a tray of colorful cookies. I mean, like, they were all the colors of the rainbow. “Here, Princess. Take a break with us. Would you like some?” She held up a blue cookie in her thick fingers.

  “Okay. Thanks.” I took the cookie, but before I could press it to my lips, Bastien sniffed it to make sure it was safe from all poisons, maladies, and Boogeymen. You never know.

  Bastien eyed the platter with longing as he palmed the small of my back and rubbed the space lightly. “Mm. Those smell good. Can I steal one?”

  Faith giggled, her dimples digging deep wells in her round cheeks. “Of course, Master Bastien. Take as many as you like.”

  “Haven’t had a macaron in ages.” He looked adorable, biting the dainty cookie in half, so I could eat the other part. The blue color was dye from super tart blueberries that hit my tongue with a burst of flavor. The outer edge was almost crispy, but the inner part of the sandwich cookie was fluffy, almost like marshmallow. Then the two cookies were stuck together with a blue jelly that tasted like love and candy and fruit.

  “Oh, man. These are amazing. Did you girls really make this?”

  Hope beamed at me as if I’d told her she was beautiful. The way she lit up at the simple compliment, she really and truly was. “We did. You like it?”

  I reached for another one and bit into the dark red cookie, sighing at the delicious raspberry that had a hint of nutmeg or something to it. “Oh, man. You’re only like, the queens of my dreams. Super way yummy.” I gave Bastien the other half and reached for another, unable to help myself. “They’re so good, I almost forgot that I’m mad at Bastien.”

  “Well done, ladies,” Bastien said to them with a slight bow.

  Mercy kissed my cheek and set the tray of cookies down on the counter next to me. “Then perhaps I’ll just set these here, in hopes they lessen your fight.”

  Faith and Hope each pressed a kiss to my cheeks before they vacated the kitchen. I kind of loved how they doted on me and Draper, treating us as if we were their children. Yesterday morning, they’d fawned over him for finishing all of his oatmeal, as if he was five. It was totally precious.

  Once we were alone, I gave Bastien my most serious face. “You shouldn’t take me away from my dad when he needs me.”

  Bastien leveled his face to mine, speaking low into my anxiety. “Listen up, Daisy. I’m doing this for your own good. When we have kids someday, no way would I want them to hear me cry out in pain. If I get hurt, you run them into another room. A kid needs to have faith that their dad can handle anything. I won’t see you lose that right before you get him back. Urien can handle this. Have faith in your father’s strength. Once that leaves a person? Well, it’s a rougher road ahead for you both if you lose that.”

  I wanted to argue and give him a piece of my mind, but his reason was so unselfish and loving; I couldn’t bring myself to be mad anymore. “That’s… You really want to have kids with me?”

  Bastien stood straighter, brushing off the front of his flannel, as if it desperately needed his attention. “Well, yeah. Eventually. You think I wanted to have kids with Reyn?”

  “Well, I assumed. You two are awfully close.” I don’t know why I went with shtick. Bastien was doing and saying so many permanent and thoughtful things lately; I wasn’t sure what to do with them all. “You’re really that certain of us?”

  He nodded, though he couldn’t look me in the eye. I think we both knew he’d jumped a hair too far off the diving board, and now our relationship was plunging into the deep end. I hoped we could handle it. He cleared his throat, staring at a fixed point on the counter. “You know I want to marry you.”

  My skin felt cold and clammy, but my heart warmed to his words. I wanted exactly that some days, but there was so much we didn’t know about each other. To make a big life shift without Judah or anything from my world felt like making only half a commitment. We hadn’t fared Common together successfully yet, and I needed to know we could make it in both worlds before I got too comfortable with how easy our love was coming these days. “How’s it going to work with Mad being my fake fiancé?”

  “When we move to Common, we’ll start over. No one there knows the arrangement. Engagements are broken sometimes. Not often, sure. Duke Henri’s daughter Gwen’s been promised to a judge’s son in Province 3, but she’s been stalling on going through with the marriage for a year now.”

  “Hello, she’s a teenager.”

  He smirked and mocked my valley girl lilt that sometimes came out. “Hello, that’s pretty normal here. If a woman hits her mid-twenties and hasn’t found a husband, that’s when the stigma starts.”

  “Oh, rats. I guess I’m an old maid already.” I frowned up at him. “You and Reyn are older than that, and you’re both not married.”

  “Not for long,” Bastien said, and then grimaced. “For Reyn, I mean. I know he’s wanted to lock that down for a while now. I can’t imagine them waiting a whole day after they move to Common before they exchange rings.” He waved his hand. “It’s different for men in Avalon. We outnumber women four to one. There simply aren’t enough women for older, unmarried men to get a stigma. Plus, I’m an Untouchable and Reyn’s a judge’s son. We can do what we want without too much social judgment.”

  “Wow. What an amazing chauvinistic society I’ve stepped into. Excellent.” I frowned. “I don’t want to disrespect Mad, though. I know a few of the people in the household know the whole thing is a fraud, but not everyone, and certainly not the public. He did me a huge solid, offering to marry me so I didn’t have to go off with Uncle Henri. I don’t want to do something mean to him.”

  Bastien smirked at me. “I like that you’re protective of my friends. Trust me, Mad will be relieved that you won’t need to marry him. He’ll take the stigma over forever tying himself to a woman who isn’t Meara.”

  “Okay. If you’re sure.”

  “We have to wait three more months until I can marry you. I have to wait, out of loyalty for Reyn’s sister. I can’t dishonor his family. They’ve done a lot for me over the years.”

  I scratched the nape of my neck uncomfortably. “Are we really talking about this now?”

  “I guess we are.” Then he grimaced and shook his head. “Maybe not. I’m supposed to ask your father for your hand. I want to do right by you. I don’t want to take shortcuts.”

  My mouth went dry at the very serious conversation we were having. “Wow. I mean, I want to say something all refined, like a wife would say, but all I can think is a stream of ‘holy crap, holy crap, holy crap.’”

  “Well, you’ve got three months to work your way up to a solid, ‘Yes, Bastien. I’ll marry you.’”

  “Thanks for the heads-up.” I rubbed my temples, trying to get the ache out of my head. “You kind of threw my future plans for a loop. I was set on living the glorious gangsta life of a spinster.”

  “I’ve got big plans for the rest of our life together, Daisy.” Bastien saw through my shtick and had pity on my ineptitude. He wrapped his arms around my waist and drew me in so my head could rest on its favorite support. The crook of Bastien’s neck was entirely masculine, and I used it as my oxygen mask in times of duress.

  “I should go check on my dad.”

  “Not now, babe
. It’s about time for the kids to show up,” he commented after I inhaled a solid half-dozen hits of his scent.

  “The kids?”

  “Your soccer camp?” he reminded me.

  I sat up straight, my eyes opening wider. “Oh, right! This whole not having a watch thing is really throwing me.”

  Bastien gave me a smile in a way that did nothing to quell the serious vibe between us. There was intention in his eyes, permanence that both scared and excited me. “I love that you do this. Taking all the kids from Province 9 into the dungeon to teach them to play soccer? It’s genius, and exactly what everyone loved about Lane before she left. Her province was all about working, and then playing. Most of the provinces were about work and survival only.”

  “Lane knows what’s important. Plus, how are the parents supposed to settle into their new homes if they’re worrying about keeping an eye on their kids? Also, I don’t want the same stigma that Morgan needed in Province 1. Royalty shouldn’t be feared like that. They should be able to come to us if they need something.”

  “You are Lane’s daughter, that’s for sure.”

  I grabbed an apple from the bowl on the island. “I love when you get me. Help me round up the kids?”

  “Whatever you like, Princess.” His teasing tone always made me smile with a slight eye roll. I batted my hand at him, and he popped his elbow to me. Bastien was my welcome distraction, though as we walked through the mansion to the front door, my heart shook with the knowledge that while I killed time with the kids, my dad was in agony.

  Kids and the Keep

  “Just like that, Gaylord. Only try it with the inside of your foot next time. Kick it like you’re doing too often, and you’re going to break a toe one of these days.” I caught a second, smaller ball I was tossing with a few of the littler ones.

  Four days had passed since Kerdik started my father on the course of excruciating pain, and I hadn’t been allowed near his chambers since. So far, there had been only pain on my father’s part, and no healing to speak of. Kerdik assured me that sometimes things took longer than anticipated. I, in turn, assured Kerdik that if he let my father keep howling in agony, Urien would soon have a bunkmate who screamed louder than he did.

 

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